Part Thirty-Six: An Ode to Our Brother
A hazy blur of January faded into an equally dreary February. When it wasn't snowing outside, it was raining, and there were large patches of ice scattered about everywhere on Hogwarts grounds. Care of Magical Creatures classes had been canceled for the past two weeks as Hagrid had slipped on a particularly large patch of ice and was spending his days with Poppy Pomfrey and the students unfortunate enough to be caught up in the sudden flu epidemic taking over Hogwarts. Kali and Ron were both among the said students and drove Madam Pomfrey crazy for the total of three days they spent in the infirmary. Apparently, they were too loud when trying to entertain themselves.
The trip to the hospital wing, however, came welcomed to the couple as it got them away from Hermione. She had been running ragged, trying to get everyone in on her N.E.W.T. game plan, which involved a strenuous three-month study plan involving practice exams and games followed by six weeks of intensive cramming. Even Draco, who also had begun studying for his N.E.W.T.s, ran away every time Hermione came into view. The only time she was sane was whenever Servius seemed to be around. Perhaps she didn't want him to think she was crazy, or perhaps she didn't think about school work when he was around, but either way, the strange twist of fate caused Harry to keep Servius around a lot more than he would have.
On more than one occasion, and it seemed to have been happening every week since early in October, Kali could be found laboring over a bit of parchment in the common room. She would scribble frantically with her quill, pause for a moment as if to think, and then begin scribbling again. At first, Ron and Hermione had surmised she was studying or doing homework, but when they asked her about it, she gave them small, secretive smiles and set back to her work. Once she seemed satisfied with whatever she had written, she would scribble a few, short notes, head up to the owlery, and send away her Tawny Owl, Calypso. She never elaborated on just what she was doing and Ron eventually just assumed it was Kali being her strange, idiosyncratic self.
As far as classes went, everyone was having a reasonable time. Draco had little to no problems with Crabbe, Goyle, or any of his former house mates as they didn't even so much as look at him anymore. The professors were constantly trying to get Blaise to talk about what had happened, but he continued to refuse. As for Kali, she was caught up in Potions, though her tutoring sessions with Ron had increased to three times a week. With the N.E.W.T.s approaching (as Hermione was ready to remind any and every one), Snape thought she needed all the practice she could get. Since it was obvious he was right, there was no real arguing with him.
Harry, however, was worse off with the Slytherins than he had ever been before, even when he and Draco were enemies. The rivalry had come to a zenith, an apex that far surpassed any that had been there previously, making all former feuds look trifle and silly. This altercation was only proven more at the Quidditch match, pitching Gryffindor against Slytherin. With Harry as the Quidditch Captain (and only being slightly less intense than Oliver Wood), the Gryffindor team was not allowed to lose. For the weeks preceding the match, Harry had the team practicing five nights a week, and it would have been six if Professor McGonagall would have let him. Draco missed his boyfriend and appreciated the effort, but he had to admit that the Gryffindor victory (by a whomping two-hundred-thirty points) was that much sweeter when Harry was so determined.
Valentine's Day came on a Saturday that year and Kali rolled over in bed to find that Ron had already gotten up and gone. Since starting work at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, it was Ron who woke up first on Saturday mornings, and even on his one day off, she assumed he found that he couldn't sleep in. There was a slight pain in her lower back and inner thighs as Kali rolled over in bed, after affects of their love-making the night before. Sitting on the side table was a white long-stemmed rose and a short note that read:
Kali-
Happy Valentine's Day! I got up early and decided to let you sleep because I am nicer than you are. Don't forget, we have a Hogsmeade visit today. We have to stop by and visit Fred and George. Sorry about that, but I thought I'd warn you.
Love,
Ron
Kali smiled at the note and the rose. She wasn't sure whether to be disappointed her hadn't been there when she woke or be touched that he had remembered she preferred white roses to red. Deciding to go for the latter, Kali snatched his bed sheet, wrapped it around her body, and made her way to his bathroom to prepare for the day.
Once dressed and showered, Kali made her way down to the common room to find only Seamus Finnigan sitting there.
"Where's Lavender?" she asked.
"Getting ready to go to Hogsmeade," he answered. "How about Ron? I see you spent the night with him again." Seamus gave her one of his infamous, knowing grins.
"Yes, I did, and I'm not sure where he got off to. He was already gone when I woke up. You haven't seen him, have you?"
"No, but he's probably at breakfast. When you don't know where he is, it's usually smart to check the Great Hall."
"So I've noticed," she quipped. "If you see him, let him know I went down to see my dad and then I'm going to the Great Hall."
"Okay."
Sweeping past him, Kali passed out through the portrait hole and headed down the many flights of Hogwarts stairs that lead to the dungeons. She often wondered if there was a faster passage to her father's rooms as it took so long to get from the seventh floor common room in Gryffindor down to where he lived. The walk took too much time and Kali often tired of seeing the same Slytherins glaring at her for trespassing into what they believed to be their territory.
"Morning, Daddy," she said, sliding into his rooms and sitting beside him by the fire.
"Good morning, Kailah. To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I haven't been by in a few days. I thought I owed it to you to stop by. Let you know your still loved. Make sure you haven't completely lost feeling in your heart. That sort of thing."
"How kind of you. I suppose you're going into Hogsmeade today with Mister Weasley."
She gave a quick nod. "Of course I am, it being Valentine's Day and all. We have to go visit his brothers. I have to admit, I'm a bit worried about what the twins plan on doing. They're very interesting sorts, those Weasley twins."
"Indeed. And how are things with Mister Weasley? Still going too slow for your liking, I hope."
Kali bit the inside of her lip.
"Kaliah?"
"What, Daddy?" she replied, feigning innocence.
"How are things going with Ron?"
"You called him Ron," she exclaimed, glad for a chance to deter the subject.
"Kailah."
"What? Oh - yes. Ron. They're wonderful. Just wonderful," she said, a little too quickly to be true. Snape's brow furrowed as he stared at her, trying to figure out just what to make of this.
"You're worrying me, Kailah. He didn't hurt you, did he?"
"Oh yes, Daddy. He hits me because he loves me."
Snape gave a very deep sort of sigh. "What aren't you telling me, Kailah. You know that you can tell me anything."
Kali tried to give him a grin but it resulted in more of a grimace than anything. "I don't know what you're talking about, Daddy. There's nothing I'm not telling you. Everything's just fine. I told him I love him. He told me he loves me. He hits me because he loves me. Things in that area."
He studied her for a moment, going over her words in his head, and then his eyes went wide.
"You had sex with him."
It was no more than a statement, said almost as if he were in class telling her the use of a complicated potion.
"No, I didn't," she squeaked.
"You had sex with him."
"Daddy, I didn't have sex with Ron."
"Yes, you did."
"No, I didn't."
"If you hadn't, you would have said you did. You're contrary and backwards like that, Kailah."
"Dammit," she muttered, chastising herself. "Oh yes, Daddy. We have sex all the time."
"It's too late to fix the damage, Kailah."
For a long moment, they stared at each other, neither knowing exactly what to say.
"You could have told me," he said, finally.
"I didn't know how you'd react."
He closed his eyes for a brief, pained instant, before motioning her to come sit beside him. "Kailah," he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder, "I won't lie to you and tell you I'm happy about this. You wouldn't believe me if I did so, anyway. However, just because I'm not happy about it doesn't mean that you can't tell me. I know it must be hard for you to not have your mother in times like this. Sometimes I think I should have left you stay with Serena. She would have been better at this than I am."
"Daddy," she interrupted, "I like being here with you. Besides, if I had stayed with Aunt Serena, I wouldn't know Ron."
"Yes, it's a very cruel twist of fate," he replied, giving her a soft, teasing smile. Kali sighed and settled back into him.
"You didn't make me come here, Daddy. You gave me a choice and I decided to be here with you."
"I know." He sighed and ran his fingers over the smooth, silky black strands of her hair. "Why Weasley, Kailah? Why, of all people, did it have to be Weasley?"
"It could have been worse, Dad. It could have been Harry. It could have been Neville."
"Point well taken. You're really in love with him, aren't you?"
She simply nodded.
"Bloody hell, I think I need to get drunk."
Laughing, she sat back up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I have to go find Ron before we go to Hogsmeade. I'll come by tomorrow night if you'd like."
"You might want to give me the rest of the weekend to process this information, Kailah. I need time to mourn."
"Alright then. I'll see you on Monday when you emerge from you bat cave."
"Goodbye, Kailah."
~*~
"A whole day in Hogsmeade," breathed Ron as he and Kali stepped outside into the crisp, February air. It had finally stopped snowing and the sun was peaking out from behind the clouds as Ron wrapped his scarlet and gold Gryffindor scarf around his neck.
"It looks like it's going to snow again later on in the day," said Kali, studying the sky as Ron took her hand and they headed off in the direction of the village. He nodded.
Halfway to the school's gates, the figure of a lean, black boy appeared, coming in their direction. His hair was a curly blond and Kali thought he must be freezing as the only garment on his body was a large piece of white material that looked like a diaper. Strapped to his back was a quiver full of arrows, he carried a bow, and around his waist was a belt with a large pouch attached. On the pouch were the letters 'WWW'.
"Lee?" asked Ron as the boy came up beside them.
"My name is Cupid," he replied before reaching into his pouch and sprinkling red, pink, and white confetti all over them. "Happy Valentine's Day!"
"Lee, did you just throw confetti at us?"
"It's for the happy lovers," he said, "and my name is Cupid. Eros, if you're Greek. And it isn't confetti. It's fairy dust."
"Of course," said Ron. "How couldn't we know it was fairy dust?" He rolled his eyes and they began off in the direction of Hogsmeade again, Cupid (or Lee, if you talked to Ron) following them. "Are you stalking us?"
"I'm sharing in the joy of happy couples on Valentine's Day," said Cupid, sprinkling them with fairy dust a second time. Kali shrugged, grinned, and picked a piece out of Ron's hair.
It was in the shape of a heart, as she soon saw all the pieces were, and they were littered the whole way from the Hogwarts castle into Hogsmeade. She assumed it was all from the 'happy couples' Cupid had decided to share joy with before. Written on each heart was the letters 'WWW' as it had been on his pouch.
"Why are you dressed like Cupid, Lee?" asked Ron as they got into Hogsmeade.
"My name is Cupid," he insisted.
"Don't you have other happy couples to grace with your presence?"
"I'm under strict orders to make sure you find your way to the Beacon of Love."
"The Beacon of Love?" asked Kali. Ron shrugged, and they both found Cupid guiding them down the streets of Hogsmeade. Turning the corner, Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes came into view. There were red, pink, and white balloons floating all over the place with streamers to boot.
"You see?" said Cupid. "The Beacon of Love."
"I should have known," muttered Ron as the door opened and they were pulled inside.
"He followed you, too?" asked Harry the minute they set foot inside. Ron, sighing, nodded.
"He's here!" called Cupid, disappearing behind the counter. Fred and George emerged from the back, identical wicked smiles on their faces as they surveyed the couple.
"Ronniekins," cried George, throwing out his arms and racing at Ron to wrap him in a tight embrace.
"Happy Valentine's Day!" cried Fred, in an important sort of voice. "We told you we had something extra special planned. Cupid! Where did you go?"
The black boy reemerged after a moment or two, dreadlocks where the blond curls had been and sans bow and arrows. Fred shrieked upon seeing him.
"Cupid! Where is your wig?"
"And your bow!" added George, sounding equally as horrified.
"If you don't get your act together, we're going to have to fire you."
"And that means you can't play Cupid next year, either."
Cupid frowned. "You can't fire me! I'll find my bow! Really! Give me a second chance!"
"Well -" started Fred, looking unsure, "it is Valentine's Day. What do you think, George?"
"I say we give him another chance, but only one more. We can't have a Cupid without his bow and arrows. How would that make us look? I hope you still have your fairy dust."
"I do! I do!" cried Cupid, showing them his belt. "Wait! I found my bow and quiver." He strapped the quiver to his back once again and took up his bow as Fred and George turned around to face Ron and Kali again.
"Sorry about him," said George. "It's so hard to find good help these days."
"We knew we just had to do something for the happy couple, so here it is! We've even written you a poem."
"Can't you torture someone else?" moaned Ron.
"I think it's funny," said Kali.
"You would."
"You know, you're starting to sound like my daddy. I went to visit him this morning, by the way. He - er - he knows about - er - you know . . ."
At first, Ron stared at her blankly. Then, as realization began to sink in, he grew horrified, staring at her as if she had just sprouted a second head.
"What?" he snapped.
"Yeah . . . it was quite by accident and he kind of figured it out on his own but, you know . . ."
"Did you have sex?" asked Harry, interrupting.
Leave it to Harry to think about sex, thought Ron, glaring at him. Unfortunately, he didn't get a chance to reply as Fred and George took this silence for admission. They clapped their hands together and beamed at Ron.
"You had sex!" exclaimed Fred. "We have to change the ending to our poem, now," he added to George as an after thought.
"I'm so proud, Fred! Our little brother! They were right! They do grow up so fast!"
"And with Snape's daughter! And he knows. That takes some real balls to sleep with Snape's daughter. I'd never have had the courage to do it. Can you imagine having to go to class and have him giving you that patent glare of his, knowing he knows where you stuck your penis."
Ron had gone a sickly white but the empty, swimming sensation in his head paled in comparison to how light his head felt when Fred, in a spurt of joy and excitement, ran outside and began shrieking about how Ron was no longer a virgin. It took the small snickers Harry was making beside him to bring Ron back to the present. Kali was still standing beside him, looking very small and aware of herself. George was trying to restrain Fred, or at least that had been his purpose upon going outside, but his cause seemed lost as he joined in. Ron pulled himself together just long enough to shout at them, go outside, and yank the twins back into their shop.
"Can you please torture someone else for a change," pleaded Ron once again.
"We aren't trying to torture you," said George. "We're really very proud."
"Besides, who else would be more exciting to talk about?" added Fred. "You're the weirdest couple Hogwarts has ever seen."
"Not true," said Kali. "My mother and father were much stranger than Ron and I."
"Besides, Harry and Draco are even weirder than that," said Ron.
Draco and Harry glared at him, both looking murderous.
"Harry and Draco?" asked Fred, looking dumbstruck.
"I forgot to tell you!" cried Cupid, coming around to join them. "I saw them coming into Hogsmeade from Hogwarts together while I was waiting for Ron. They were holding hands and everything."
"They didn't know about us, Ron," seethed Draco, "and I wanted it to stay that way."
Ron made an embarrassed sort of laugh and shrugged. "Sorry."
"Well that is just sweet. Do you shag, too?" asked George.
"I'm sure they do," said Ron. "All the time."
"Speaking of shagging," said Harry, not caring if Fred and George knew and failing to notice that Draco did, "why didn't you tell me about you and Kali?"
"I never got around to it. It didn't come up in conversation."
"Not come up in conversation? Sex always comes up in conversation with me."
"Not recently," countered Ron. "You've been kicking Slytherin arse and yelling about how you want them to all die. Why didn't you tell me about you and Draco?"
"Er - it didn't come up in conversation?"
Ron rolled his eyes.
"Since when are you gay?" interrupted Fred, pulling Ron and Harry apart.
"I'm not gay. I'm bisexual," Harry informed them. "He's gay."
Draco sighed.
"We have to announce this, too!" shrieked Fred, already bounding for the door.
"Tell Hogsmeade I shagged Harry and I swear to Merlin I will hex you so fucking fast you won't know what hit you," seethed Draco, holding out his wand. Fred bit his lip, looking back and forth between Draco and George, and slowly made his way back to his twin.
"Draco's not an exhibitionist," explained Harry. Kali nodded as if this scene were actually making sense.
"What about the poem?" interrupted Cupid, now standing behind both couples.
"Oh, yes!" cried George. "The poem."
"Oh brother," muttered Ron.
"I want to hear it," said Kali.
"So do I," added Harry. Draco rolled his eyes.
Fred and George simultaneously cleared their throat and said in unison, "This poem is entitled, 'The Ballad of Cupid: An Ode to Our Brother' by Fred and George Weasley."
Harry and Ron exchanged glances as Cupid proceeded to shower all four in fairy dust.
"What is so special about today
That gives a reason to our poem
Is that today is Valentine's Day
And for once Ron isn't alone."
Ron sighed as fairy dust came pouring down on him and from behind, Lee said, "Hummm . . ."
"We met her at the Halloween Ball
Before we knew her dad was scary.
Who'd have thought it would be Snape?
At least she's not dating Harry."
"Hummm . . ." went Lee.
"They came to Christmas at our house
And mum forced us to make dinner.
It wasn't our fault she picked up a trick wand.
We hoped Snape would pick it up sooner."
Kali joined Lee in his humming.
"The adults talked all night
But they wouldn't tell us who about.
We're guess it was Ron and Kali,
Otherwise, mum might just shout."
A piece of fairy dust fell onto Ron's cheek as Kali and Lee hummed.
"We caught them snogging in the hall
For more than a second or two,
And Percy came about midday,
Saying, 'Happy Christmas! Happy Christmas! Happy Christmas to you!'"
"Hummm . . ."
"When Charlie showed up late that night
We learned he forgot to send his letter.
One look at Snape, he thought he was crazy,
And that staying with dragons was better."
Kali bobbed her head and went, "Hummm . . ."
"And on Christmas day - it was fun.
Ron and Kali snogged some more.
We're so proud of our little brother.
Now he's just got to score."
The took simultaneous bows as a big glop of fairy dust fell out of Ron's hair. Harry, Draco, and Kali burst into a wild round of applause.
"That's all we have," said Fred, "but we'll add a stanza now that you've had sex. Otherwise it won't make any sense."
"Because of course everything about this day makes sense," muttered Ron. "I'm not waiting around for this. Let's go."
Taking Kali's hand, he guided her out of Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes, with Draco and Harry coming close behind.
"That was interesting," said Kali once they had stopped teasing Ron about snogging in the hall and needing to score. "So, who was Cupid, anyway?"
"The twins' friend, Lee Jordan. He was in their year at Hogwarts. Two years ahead of us," explained Ron.
"He used to do commentary on Quidditch games," said Harry.
"I'm sad I missed that! He seems hysterical!"
"He was," said Harry.
"He said I was a priss on my broom," complained Draco. Harry gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.
"It's cold out here," said Ron. "Anyone care to go to the Three Broomsticks?"
"Sounds good," said Draco, and they headed down the street.
They settled down near the front with mugs of foaming butterbeer sitting before them.
"Has anyone seen Hermione?" asked Harry, taking a sip and slipping his arm around Draco's shoulder.
"Not since breakfast," replied Ron. "I bet she's with Servius. That's who I last saw her going off with and we all know how she fancies him."
"I know," said Kali. "It must be something incredibly new for Servius. He isn't used to girls thinking he's heterosexual. Aunt Serena really got him good between the purple hair and the Spice Girl shirt she made him wear to camp."
"The Spice Girls?" asked Ron.
"A muggle group," replied Kali as Harry nodded and laughed.
"You know a lot of muggle things," said Draco.
"Uncle Martin's half-blood and Aunt Serena's fascinated by muggles. I went to a muggle school before I started at Chivington. I quite enjoy combining the two worlds."
"You'll just adore my father, then," said Ron, rolling his eyes. "It's a shame you didn't have more time to talk to him over Christmas. He'd talk your ear off about muggle things. Dad loves muggles." Harry nodded in agreement.
From somewhere at the near left, a drunken voice called, "Madam Rosmerta! Two more!"
They looked over to see her staring at the man, frowning. "I think you've had quite enough."
"Daddy?" asked Kali.
She was, unfortunately, correct.
Snape turned around to face her, a silly sort of drunken smile coming across his face. "'Ello, Kailah," he said, slowly, and trying very hard not to slur his words. "What're you doing here?"
"It's a Hogsmeade weekend, Daddy. You know that." He pressed his lips together in a very thin line and nodded. "You're drunk." He nodded again. "Maybe you should go back to the castle." This time he shook his head.
"Nope. I'm not drunk enough."
"I hate to disagree with you, Daddy, but I think you are."
"Nope. I don't even want to remember today." He then burst out into a small fit of laughter.
"Daddy thinks everything is really funny when he's drunk," explained Kali. "Everything." Harry was trying very hard to hide his amusement. "What are you laughing at, Daddy?" she asked as she got up to help him keep his balance.
"The funny boy in the diaper."
From across the room, Lee Jordan was crossing the room, his blond wig back in place.
"Er - hello Professor," said Lee upon seeing Snape. He, in turn, began to laugh again.
"Silly," he mused, shaking his head.
"Very silly," agreed Kali. "Daddy, I really think you should go back to the castle. You've had enough alcohol."
"Will I remember today?"
"I don't know, Daddy."
"I don't want to remember today, Kailah."
"I know, Daddy."
"Er -" interrupted Lee, "I've been sent to you with a message from the Keepers of the Beacon of Love." He cleared his throat, took on awkward glance at Snape, and said:
"Word just in: He got in.
Our little brother shagged.
Even if she's mean Snape's daughter,
We know that she's no hag."
"Sweet Merlin," Ron whispered, hanging his head and running his fingers through his hair. Snape, to his left, began to laugh again.
"I need more ale," he said, turning back to the counter, but Madam Rosmerta refused to give it to him. After a great deal of persuasion, Kali got him to the door and was ready to escort him back to the castle when Hagrid walked by the door and Snape burst out, falling onto Hagrid's large chest. "Take me to the pub," he requested.
Hagrid, who often went to Hog's Head and was on the way there himself, looked at Snape strangely. Apparently, Snape was not one to frequent Hogsmeade, much less the pub, and he certainly looked drunk enough already.
"He's trying to forget I participated in an act of fornication with Ron," explained Kali. "Tell him you'll take him to the pub and take him back to Hogwarts instead."
Hagrid took one look at Snape and nodded. As they went down the street, Kali could hear Snape bellow at a small student, "Ten points from Gryffindor for looking at me wrong!"
"But I'm a Hufflepuff," the girl protested.
Snape's expression softened. "I'm sorry. Twenty points to Hufflepuff. It must be difficult living with Servius."
She stared at him strangely as it wasn't usual to see Snape in a way less than threatening. Kali sighed and turned back to her friends. "Er - I think I'm going to head back and see how he is. I don't feel much like celebrating anymore, anyway."
"I'll come with you," said Ron, casting a glance at Lee. "I'm not in the highest spirits, either."
Draco and Harry bid their goodbyes as Ron and Kali linked hands and set out for Hogwarts. Kali was already in a bitter mood as they walked, though she wasn't sure with who, and she sighed very loudly when she was Servius and Hermione together, flirting without shame. She looked at Ron, who was smirking, and headed over to them.
"Happy Valentine's Day," she said.
"Hey, Kailah," said Servius. "Are you okay? You look like shit."
"Thanks for that, Serv," she muttered. "You know, you two are driving me crazy."
"What?" said Hermione, looking confused.
"You! You both drive me crazy! Hermione, here's a little secret: he likes you. Guess what, Serv? She likes you. You flirt all the time, why don't you just get together already?"
Hermione and Servius stared at her, lost for words, but Kali didn't wait around for them to appear. With Ron snickering beside her, they made their way back to the castle, determined to see how Snape was and just how long he was going to be sick and hungover. It was a shame the only way to get through a hangover with magic was with a potion. Ron somehow got the feeling Snape wasn't going to drink anything that Kali had made. It had been a very strange day.
Forgive all of my mistakes. I've posted in a hurry to get this out to you now that I have the internet back. My humblest apologies. If you see any glaring errors, let me know at angeldlsm00@hotmail.com. I'll get around to fixing it eventually.
