A/N: OMG!!! The saddest thing happened! Like totally! (No, it wasn't that
my imaginary dog got run over by a cat-I mean, car) NO ONE gave
suggestions! I had to write this chapter all by myself!!!! You should all
be ashamed!!! :@ (That's a mad face, by the way. It says so on IM. : )) Oh
well, since there weren't any suggestions, I just wrote as I saw fit.
Oh, and here's a little tip for reading this! The whole thing basically is the letter, until the letter is finished. However, the things in parenthesis are about Malfoy while he's reading the letter, so don't get anything confused!
Disclaimers: Uh.what now? I still have to write this stuff? *sniffs* You horrid people, you just want to sue me because I'm such a cool butterfly! Fine, I won't let you! I don't own anyone! (Butterfly? Where'd that come from?)
***
Glimpse of Your Future Husband
***
Chapter 3: The Letter
Dear Cousin,
I am writing to inform you that I'm on my way back to London. Yes, I know I as supposed to stay until Monday, but I refuse to. I cannot, I repeat, CANNOT stand it there anymore. It was revolting, truly! Yes, you may think I'm just being unpleasant and spoilt, but really, I can account for my actions! By the bye, I'm NOT marrying that abominable girl. No, coz, you may not pitch this letter into the fire. This is of the utmost importance, and you must read to the end before you conjure up whatever horrible punishments you can think of for me. Here is the whole story.
("And why in the world shouldn't I throw this in the fire?" wondered Malfoy. "Well, maybe I'm just a tinsy bit interested. Only a bit, though.)
I arrived at their estate later than I had planned to. No, I was not sulking along the way; my horse was having problems.
("Oh really?" thought Malfoy. "You're certain it wasn't yourself having the problems?")
So, when I did eventually reach there, their butler had the dashed impudence to ask me for my name!
("Impudence, eh? And if he didn't ask, what should he have announced you as? My lady, the no-name-stranger has arrived! Really, Harry, you're so childish sometimes.")
As was expected, I was damned tired and starving. I must say this Lady Anne was most gracious and courteous, and their cook was quite amazing. She made some excellent country dish for which I cannot for the life of me remember the name of. But I can't remember ever eating it in town? Oh no! London is being beat by a country cook! Really, coz, you must get your cook to obtain the recipe. The dish was purple and fried with eggs.
("Why, how helpful. Was it prunes perhaps? Are country folk now interested in eating prunes fried with eggs? How interesting!")
Well, after which, I packed off to bed and left my stuff to-whom I thought to be-a maid I met in the hallway.
And who should barge into my room the next morning but the very same 'maid'?! It was-well, really, no word can describe it. Irksome, to say the least. The funny thing was, she was holding this big tray laden with breakfast, and she was wearing an awful, dirty maid's dress, and she tells me she isn't a maid. In fact, she says that she is Miss Granger! Yes, the very lady herself! Lady? What am I talking about? She's no more a lady than you are! Well, rather, you're perhaps even more so, begging your pardon.
(Malfoy lifted an elegant brow at this. "I wonder if I always give people the impression that I'm girlish?")
Well, back to Miss Granger. She was perfectly deplorable, I tell you! Disgusting, even! Her hair was all frizzy and gross, and she sloshed all this rouge on her face making her look like some clown! Imagine, a lady of quality looking like a clown! Besides which, she has the worst teeth I've seen in my whole life! They were dashed well near to black! I am using exclamations, I know, but really, it was horrid. To top it all, she was FAT! Fat, I tell you! In fact, I don't think I shall describe her anymore. It's making me quite sick just recalling all this. You must feel thankful that you weren't there.
("What in the world? But I have seen Miss Granger before. Sure, it was three years ago, but she was quite lovely. One doesn't change that fast, does one? Oh, but her mother did mention her big appetite. I wonder if that's it? Baby fat?)
Naturally, at that moment, I already decided that she is most certainly not the one for me, and you can't persuade me otherwise! But that's not all. I told her I was to be on my way out right that moment, but she begs me to stay for breakfast. Well, as I saw that she had already carried the tray over and that I was actually quite hungry, I did not decline.
("Miss Granger has a big appetite? What am I thinking about? Harry's the one with the big appetite! I swear he could eat a cow!")
However, as she pours the coffee out, she lifts her head and gives me this big toothy grin. Out of any other girl, I would have called it flirtation, but from her, I'd say it was just sick. In fact, I was so disgusted by the smile that I let out a little scream.
("Disgust can make one scream? I never knew that! Well, I now know another way to keep Harry under control.")
Anyhow, I guess the scream startled her as well, and what does she do but knock the cup of coffee over? Naturally, none of the coffee spilled on herself, but all of it spilled on me. ME, cousin! To think! Never have I been so humiliated in my life! In fact, that wasn't even the worst. The worst was still to come.
("I can still remember the time you wet your pants in public," thought Draco with a smile.)
A cockroach crawled out of the cup. Has this place NO sanitation? Oh it was- nevermind, I shan't say the word disgust again. Oh, and not only did it crawl out of the cup, it also crawled into my coat! Gave me a heck of a time trying to get it out. And all the while, she's just sitting there gazing at me. Not in the least helpful, I say! Birdwitted, as well as ugly!
Well, after the cockroach was successfully smashed, I told her to hand me my cravat, and that I was to be on my way. But just as she was about to hand it to me, she suddenly gets this look of great fascination on her face and asks in a child's voice if she could study it. Naturally, that surprised me, but who was I to deny her pleasure?
("Really now? Are you sure it wasn't because you wanted her to say it was the most beautiful cravat she's ever seen? And you say I'm girlish!")
However, she doesn't just study it, she tied it in a knot! A double knot, for that matter. One would never have thought her dainty little fingers capable of it!
And that was when I decided to run off. Thankfully, she hadn't yet unpacked my clothes and I was able to run off before anyone could detain me.
I hope you understand all the troubles I had to undergo, and I hope you understand that I'm not going back!
With love,
H.P.
At this point, Draco let out a smirk.
"Cousin, you are so silly. But Miss Granger, you cut quite an interesting figure. He says you are a fat child, yet you have dainty fingers? How is that to be? Well, either way, hats off to you, milady. You have successfully gotten rid of my cousin-for the time being. But I assure you this isn't over yet. Not with me around."
***
End of chapter 3
***
A/N: And I finished that abominable chapter. Now Hermione and Draco cross swords!!! How interesting it will get! (I sound like a commercial, don't I?) *yawn* I'm way too tired to elongate this speech, so onto my gratitude to you following reviewers:
Jamie: Thanks awfully for pointing out that folly. I was originally going to make them brothers, you know, but then I was like, Harry Potter is Draco Malfoy's brother? Yeah right! So anyway, I really appreciate you helping me out there, or else everyone's going to be confused!
Dragon Guardian of the Sea (a.k.a Meredith): Sorry if I don't quite understand what you mean about the bloody chapter, but hey, glad you liked it. ^_^ I'll e-mail you for further updates, no problems about that!
Twisted Angel: Funny, funny. You're the second person to actually say that, and I'm glad. I really can't help but laugh every time someone does it, because I didn't think anyone would actually listen to me, you know. Anyway, I hope you mean it!
C.Kitsune: I AM SO TOTALLY MAD AT YOU!!! *sigh* Oh well. It's not like you're actually going to read this-wait, you might. AHH! I don't even remember what you wrote. Oh, how troublesome you are. I'M TELLING MR. A THAT YOU CRITICIZIED MY STORY!!! ^_^ I'm going to criticize yours now. HAHAHAHA.
JoeBob1379(a.k.a Allison, or Mrs. Allison Snape): Wow, you read my story! Go Allison!!! Besides, I was supposing that my audience wasn't signed in. Hmph. :@ Hahaha, of course it isn't going to be Harry/Hermione! I'm not _that_ evil! Allison/Snape pairing? Oh, my! Uh-I'll try. But no one else request this!!! I'm not going to stick all my reviewers into this story. Well, actually, that might be fun. And yeah, the review's up to my standards, I guess.
DazedPanda: Hey, I kept an audience! Hooray for me!!! Glad you like my writing, and hope you read more!
Oh, and here's a little tip for reading this! The whole thing basically is the letter, until the letter is finished. However, the things in parenthesis are about Malfoy while he's reading the letter, so don't get anything confused!
Disclaimers: Uh.what now? I still have to write this stuff? *sniffs* You horrid people, you just want to sue me because I'm such a cool butterfly! Fine, I won't let you! I don't own anyone! (Butterfly? Where'd that come from?)
***
Glimpse of Your Future Husband
***
Chapter 3: The Letter
Dear Cousin,
I am writing to inform you that I'm on my way back to London. Yes, I know I as supposed to stay until Monday, but I refuse to. I cannot, I repeat, CANNOT stand it there anymore. It was revolting, truly! Yes, you may think I'm just being unpleasant and spoilt, but really, I can account for my actions! By the bye, I'm NOT marrying that abominable girl. No, coz, you may not pitch this letter into the fire. This is of the utmost importance, and you must read to the end before you conjure up whatever horrible punishments you can think of for me. Here is the whole story.
("And why in the world shouldn't I throw this in the fire?" wondered Malfoy. "Well, maybe I'm just a tinsy bit interested. Only a bit, though.)
I arrived at their estate later than I had planned to. No, I was not sulking along the way; my horse was having problems.
("Oh really?" thought Malfoy. "You're certain it wasn't yourself having the problems?")
So, when I did eventually reach there, their butler had the dashed impudence to ask me for my name!
("Impudence, eh? And if he didn't ask, what should he have announced you as? My lady, the no-name-stranger has arrived! Really, Harry, you're so childish sometimes.")
As was expected, I was damned tired and starving. I must say this Lady Anne was most gracious and courteous, and their cook was quite amazing. She made some excellent country dish for which I cannot for the life of me remember the name of. But I can't remember ever eating it in town? Oh no! London is being beat by a country cook! Really, coz, you must get your cook to obtain the recipe. The dish was purple and fried with eggs.
("Why, how helpful. Was it prunes perhaps? Are country folk now interested in eating prunes fried with eggs? How interesting!")
Well, after which, I packed off to bed and left my stuff to-whom I thought to be-a maid I met in the hallway.
And who should barge into my room the next morning but the very same 'maid'?! It was-well, really, no word can describe it. Irksome, to say the least. The funny thing was, she was holding this big tray laden with breakfast, and she was wearing an awful, dirty maid's dress, and she tells me she isn't a maid. In fact, she says that she is Miss Granger! Yes, the very lady herself! Lady? What am I talking about? She's no more a lady than you are! Well, rather, you're perhaps even more so, begging your pardon.
(Malfoy lifted an elegant brow at this. "I wonder if I always give people the impression that I'm girlish?")
Well, back to Miss Granger. She was perfectly deplorable, I tell you! Disgusting, even! Her hair was all frizzy and gross, and she sloshed all this rouge on her face making her look like some clown! Imagine, a lady of quality looking like a clown! Besides which, she has the worst teeth I've seen in my whole life! They were dashed well near to black! I am using exclamations, I know, but really, it was horrid. To top it all, she was FAT! Fat, I tell you! In fact, I don't think I shall describe her anymore. It's making me quite sick just recalling all this. You must feel thankful that you weren't there.
("What in the world? But I have seen Miss Granger before. Sure, it was three years ago, but she was quite lovely. One doesn't change that fast, does one? Oh, but her mother did mention her big appetite. I wonder if that's it? Baby fat?)
Naturally, at that moment, I already decided that she is most certainly not the one for me, and you can't persuade me otherwise! But that's not all. I told her I was to be on my way out right that moment, but she begs me to stay for breakfast. Well, as I saw that she had already carried the tray over and that I was actually quite hungry, I did not decline.
("Miss Granger has a big appetite? What am I thinking about? Harry's the one with the big appetite! I swear he could eat a cow!")
However, as she pours the coffee out, she lifts her head and gives me this big toothy grin. Out of any other girl, I would have called it flirtation, but from her, I'd say it was just sick. In fact, I was so disgusted by the smile that I let out a little scream.
("Disgust can make one scream? I never knew that! Well, I now know another way to keep Harry under control.")
Anyhow, I guess the scream startled her as well, and what does she do but knock the cup of coffee over? Naturally, none of the coffee spilled on herself, but all of it spilled on me. ME, cousin! To think! Never have I been so humiliated in my life! In fact, that wasn't even the worst. The worst was still to come.
("I can still remember the time you wet your pants in public," thought Draco with a smile.)
A cockroach crawled out of the cup. Has this place NO sanitation? Oh it was- nevermind, I shan't say the word disgust again. Oh, and not only did it crawl out of the cup, it also crawled into my coat! Gave me a heck of a time trying to get it out. And all the while, she's just sitting there gazing at me. Not in the least helpful, I say! Birdwitted, as well as ugly!
Well, after the cockroach was successfully smashed, I told her to hand me my cravat, and that I was to be on my way. But just as she was about to hand it to me, she suddenly gets this look of great fascination on her face and asks in a child's voice if she could study it. Naturally, that surprised me, but who was I to deny her pleasure?
("Really now? Are you sure it wasn't because you wanted her to say it was the most beautiful cravat she's ever seen? And you say I'm girlish!")
However, she doesn't just study it, she tied it in a knot! A double knot, for that matter. One would never have thought her dainty little fingers capable of it!
And that was when I decided to run off. Thankfully, she hadn't yet unpacked my clothes and I was able to run off before anyone could detain me.
I hope you understand all the troubles I had to undergo, and I hope you understand that I'm not going back!
With love,
H.P.
At this point, Draco let out a smirk.
"Cousin, you are so silly. But Miss Granger, you cut quite an interesting figure. He says you are a fat child, yet you have dainty fingers? How is that to be? Well, either way, hats off to you, milady. You have successfully gotten rid of my cousin-for the time being. But I assure you this isn't over yet. Not with me around."
***
End of chapter 3
***
A/N: And I finished that abominable chapter. Now Hermione and Draco cross swords!!! How interesting it will get! (I sound like a commercial, don't I?) *yawn* I'm way too tired to elongate this speech, so onto my gratitude to you following reviewers:
Jamie: Thanks awfully for pointing out that folly. I was originally going to make them brothers, you know, but then I was like, Harry Potter is Draco Malfoy's brother? Yeah right! So anyway, I really appreciate you helping me out there, or else everyone's going to be confused!
Dragon Guardian of the Sea (a.k.a Meredith): Sorry if I don't quite understand what you mean about the bloody chapter, but hey, glad you liked it. ^_^ I'll e-mail you for further updates, no problems about that!
Twisted Angel: Funny, funny. You're the second person to actually say that, and I'm glad. I really can't help but laugh every time someone does it, because I didn't think anyone would actually listen to me, you know. Anyway, I hope you mean it!
C.Kitsune: I AM SO TOTALLY MAD AT YOU!!! *sigh* Oh well. It's not like you're actually going to read this-wait, you might. AHH! I don't even remember what you wrote. Oh, how troublesome you are. I'M TELLING MR. A THAT YOU CRITICIZIED MY STORY!!! ^_^ I'm going to criticize yours now. HAHAHAHA.
JoeBob1379(a.k.a Allison, or Mrs. Allison Snape): Wow, you read my story! Go Allison!!! Besides, I was supposing that my audience wasn't signed in. Hmph. :@ Hahaha, of course it isn't going to be Harry/Hermione! I'm not _that_ evil! Allison/Snape pairing? Oh, my! Uh-I'll try. But no one else request this!!! I'm not going to stick all my reviewers into this story. Well, actually, that might be fun. And yeah, the review's up to my standards, I guess.
DazedPanda: Hey, I kept an audience! Hooray for me!!! Glad you like my writing, and hope you read more!
