Chapter Two - First Entry and the Morning After

            Aug. 30

            I am Squall Leonhart.

            I don't know why I felt the need to tell you that, but it's always best to start out with the basics.

            Laguna got this journal for me for my 19th birthday. Honestly, what is an nineteen-year-old boy going to do with a journal?

            I don't talk that much anyway. You shouldn't expect me to write much either.

-Squall

            Squall read over the entry and sighed to himself. It sounded lame, but he didn't know what else to write. He wasn't one for being an emotional person.

            Sighing, he added more:

            I'm back.

            Everyone liked their gifts. They're pretty easy to shop for. Quistis even said she'd wanted one of those dictionaries. Rinoa and Angelo are enjoying their dog treats. Rinoa says he loves them, and I've heard she does too.

            Rinoa's nice.

            I guess.

            She's extremely clingy, but I guess she needs some stability to help her get through life. I don't know why she chose me of all people. I can't always be there to look after her; she's too much of a child.

            I can't stand children. It's not that I hate them, no, but they're always getting into trouble, and they always need someone to help them get out of trouble. Just like Rinoa: always getting into trouble and always needing someone to get her out.

            A child.

            Always whining about something.

            Squall stopped his pen, suddenly feeling bad about writing mean things about Rinoa in his first entry. All of the things were true, of course, but he just felt bad.

            A slight smirk crossed his lips when he realized that just because he felt bad  didn't mean he was going to change it.

            The hand holding the pen quickly moved farther and farther down the paper as he filled the rest of the page with random thoughts on his life. When finished, he put the journal in the third drawer down of his desk and turned off the lights before climbing into bed. He found comfort in the cool white sheets. It felt good to be back home. He cherished the feel of being back in his own bed, of being back in his own shelter. Not that he didn't like spending time with his father; it was just that Squall was the kind of person who needed to feel at home before opening up. Now, he was at home, safe and sound in his own bed.

            Looking across the dimly lit room, Squall eyed his desk. His slate gray orbs were transfixed on the third drawer. He couldn't help but feel an odd premonition stirring within him. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have a journal after all.

            Squall shrugged the feeling off and turned over under the sheets, facing the wall instead of the desk. He told himself he was being silly. He chuckled. If only any of his friends could picture Squall being silly. His reputation would be ruined, God forbid.

            After his chuckles had subsided, Sleep slowly wrapped her loving arms around the young man, and his eyes closed dreamily as she held him in her arms.

*

            Squall awoke the next morning feeling refreshed. It was a new day. He always loved waking up to new days, for Squall Leonhart took pleasure in the simple things. He stumbled around his dorm and drank orange juice in between nibbles on a bagel. After showering and dressing, Garden's beloved Commander grabbed his new journal from the drawer and left for his office.

            When there, he sat comfortably in the chair behind his desk and leaned back, letting a rare smile cross his soft lips. He couldn't figure out why he was smiling, but it felt good to do so. Knowing he had work to do, he set to it and began going through the papers that had piled up since he had left for his mini-vacation. Before he could really get started, however, Rinoa slipped into his office with her usual perky smile.

            "Good morning, Dear," she greeted, holding her hands behind her back as always. "Sleep well?"

            He nodded slightly and prayed that she would leave soon so that he could get to work.

            "I'm really glad you're back, Squally." With this said she walked over and stood beside him at his desk. "I missed you."

            He was tempted to reply with his trademark 'Whatever,' yet, something stopped him. "I'm glad I'm back too." There was slight pull at the corner of his lips, as if he were trying to reassure her.

            She returned the smile and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "Try not to work too…" Her almond eyes fell on the dark blue notebook that was Squall's journal. "Is that what President Laguna gave you for your birthday?"

            Squall never knew Rinoa could get so excited over such a gift. "Yes."

            Her hands left their position and went in front of her to meet as she clapped. "Wonderful! Now you can get to write down what you think, and you don't have to worry about speaking them aloud!" Rinoa Heartilly seemed overjoyed by the fact.

            "Right."

            "No, seriously, Squally. Think about the possibilities!" She gestured with her hand. "You can't go wrong with a journal." Rinoa squealed. "I can't wait till you let me read it!"