All right, first warning is that this is between two guys, and with some pretty serious hints, like half a step away from graphic. Don't like it, get out now. Second is that this one was NOT my idea, I was threatened into doing it by someone who would actually carry out that threat. *shudders* And keeping in the spirit of wrongness, don't forget you might be entirely disgusted by what you are about to read. Tread carefully, little ones. See if curiosity will kill the cat...

^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^

The cloak worked flawlessly, as always. Harry slipped silently against the wall, keen green eyes scanning the hall for Filch's damnable cat. The stupid creature had ruined more than one midnight rendezvous, and the teenager would Petrify her himself the next time she was wandering the corridors. Or, he might not wait. The thought was accompanied by a slightly wicked grin as he felt behind his back for the invisible crack, slid two fingernails under the crease and whispered one word. A slight groan was the only indication the door had been opened, and he was into the room with the barrier closed before Mrs. Norris herself could have seen what transpired.

The moment he turned, he found himself pressed to the wall, hungry body on his, ravenous mouth searching out a response. The cloak's hood had fallen back on impact and widened eyes could only watch as a shocked gasp was swallowed by those lustful lips that had locked onto his own. The other man's passion made short work of his bare defenses until he was cupping the balding head in a silent plea for more, hardly coming up for breath between. Somehow they divested each other of constricting robes and once again Harry was pinned against the closed door, his lover's heavy breath on his shoulder. It was moving too fast... had been too long since they'd been together... It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Harry shuddered as his admirer moved lower, grazing his chest. He fell almost to his knees to capture the older man's lips once again in hopes of distraction and felt the clatter of wood caught between shin and stone. In a moment of irritation he nearly snapped the wand in half, but as his fingers drew across the polished handle, he couldn't help but grin. Filch had always liked a little playfulness in their lovemaking. Why not indulge him a little?

His lover had probably felt the change in his desire immediately but still looked nothing less than surprised when Harry shoved him away. The disciplinarian's eyes narrowed as his student rose to his feet, still fighting a mischievous smirk. Instead of lavishing attention on the boy, he now stood at arm's length with no clue as to why the teenager was suddenly standing in a dueling crouch with wand at the ready. He opened his mouth to demand the meaning of this intrusion when in the next instant he found himself flat on the bed. The blast had injured nothing but his pride, but Filch's mouth curved back in a sneer. It was bad enough even Dumbledore thought to treat him like garbage, but this action from his own lover was enough to send him into a temper formidable enough for even Harry Potter. That stupid, infuriating, mocking smile would be wiped off the boy's face before he knew what hit him.

The pupil quickly snapped the wand twice and Filch felt certain invisible bonds fasten around wrists and ankles. Harry swallowed once at the look on his lover's face. 'Well, at least now he can't kill me, if nothing else.' The erotic rush was immediately quelled by his next thought. 'Guess I have to thank Snape for that spell after all.' Mentally shuddering and physically shaking himself, he turned back to more important matters. Such as the fact that his lover was entirely naked and entirely helpless and entirely his for the entire night (I know, bad visual. I'm sorry.).

"What the hell do you think you're DOING, boy?" Filch nearly roared, narrowed eyes almost slits as the 17-year-old approached solemnly. Harry tossed the wand aside and the bigger man felt every muscle in his body go rigid. "What the-" He was silenced a hand tickled up his inner thigh and pleased lips landed across his open mouth. His struggle was no longer so insistent, especially as Harry removed his tongue and whispered into his lover's ear exactly what the hell he thought he was doing. And then exactly what the hell he'd PLANNED to do.

And then he did.

^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^

All right, all right, I know it's sick and twisted and Filch and ANYBODY is wrong and I should be locked up in some mental asylum. And you're probably right. But this will keep me from serious bodily harm and after she forgets about it I can take it down. :D Man, I can only imagine the flames over THIS one... And I have something even MORE demented cooked up already... Maybe not as many bad visuals though...