Nobody Said It Was Easy
- Guinevere -
A/N: This place they are going to doesn't actually exist, but Sturbridge is so cool that it could. Also, if anyone would like to read my Juice Man story (I promise, you'll like it, despite the title; it's original stuff too) then just give me a buzz and I'll e-mail it over. Also, let me know if you want more of this story, and in what time frame (i.e. future, or present). Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Stepping out of the fairytale now folks. Nothing to see here.
~*~*~
- 9 - Daylight
The Gilmores had agreed to disagree on the subject of Jess, and had left it at that. Lorelai had walked with Rory as far as their house where she went inside to tend to some laundry while Rory went to get J.D. from Jess. When she arrived at the diner Jess was nowhere to be seen, but with Luke's assistance she found him upstairs, sitting on the couch with J.D. lying asleep beside him.
"Hey," she whispered, so as not to wake her son.
"Hey," he whispered back.
"Was he good?" Rory inquired.
"Perfect. Ten minutes after you left I brought him up here and he's been asleep ever since, although Sookie, who – thank God – stopped by, said he might be getting diaper rash."
"I'll have to check on that. I'm really sorry, Jess, about what my mother said." Rory took the seat on the other end of the couch and brushed her hand over J.D.'s head lightly.
"Really, it's okay."
"It's not, but thank you for saying so."
"Rory, would you do me a favor?"
"What?"
"Stop apologizing for things that are not your fault, things I, of all people, should be apologizing for. And will you come with me somewhere this afternoon? There's something we need to talk about without any distractions."
"I guess, but I need to get J.D. home so he can eat and so I can put some Desitin on him." The two arranged J.D. delicately in his stroller and piled a blanket on top of him.
"Okay. I'll pick you up around two?"
"All right." Rory closed the door behind her, made her way down the stairs and waved to Luke on her way out.
~*~*~
At precisely two o'clock Jess was standing outside the Gilmore house readying to knock when the door opened and Rory appeared. She clicked the door shut and stealthily weaved across the porch to avoid every creaky spot. Only then did she dare speak.
"Hello," she said to him as she climbed into Luke's truck.
"Hi. What's with the Agent Bristow impersonation?"
"I asked Mom to watch J.D. but I didn't tell her why, so as to avoid another incident."
"Ah, all the covertness is becoming clear." Jess held her door open and she climbed in.
"Yes, very. So where are you whisking me off to?" Jess slammed his door and Rory cringed, hoping her mother wouldn't come running.
"You'll know soon enough. In the meantime, why don't you ignore the fact that you don't know where we're going, lest you turn into Lorelai who I can only imagine screaming 'Are we there yet?' every five minutes."
"We took a road trip, to Harvard actually, a few years ago, and I was the one doing all the nagging. Granted at that moment she didn't care where we went."
"Well here, then," he handed Rory a book with the cover torn off. "So you won't nag. It's The Alchemist. Fitting, I think, for our little journey."
"I don't see how, but okay," Rory opened and began to read while Jess got on the highway headed north. The two sat in a companionable silence, The Distillers screeching softly, until they passed a 'Welcome to Massachusetts' sign forty-five minutes later.
"Jess?" Rory glanced over at him cautiously.
"Yes?" he, on the other hand, had not a care in the world.
"Where, exactly, are we going?"
"Uh, uh, no nagging. We'll be there soon enough, so don't worry."
Rory returned to her reading but continued to look sideways at her travel companion. Maybe he really was off his rocker.
"Here we are," Jess said with a flourish as he pulled into a parking spot and turned off the engine.
Rory looked around unimpressed. "A rest stop? Wow, it's really nice and all, but are you kidding me?"
"Kidding you? Never. Come on, I'll show you why we're really here." Jess hopped out and waited for Rory to follow, which she finally, reluctantly did. They walked up a tree-covered hill beyond the restroom building and through the woods.
"This little excursion into the wild is all well and good, but can't we just go home now?" Rory was failing to see the point in all of this.
"We're almost there, just wait for it."
She continued to follow but was about to turn around and run back for the truck when they stepped into a clearing and she saw the view. In front of her, the hill ended in a cliff which looked over a large navy blue lake. Her breath almost caught in her throat, it was so amazing. "This is beautiful," she gasped. Jess just stood there, admiring the view and feeling pretty satisfied with himself. "How did you ever find this place?"
Jess sat down relatively close to the edge of the cliff and motioned for Rory to do the same. "One weekend last year I was going to drive to Boston to see Jane's Addiction. I stopped here to get something to drink and saw these two kids running up the hill, screaming something to their parents about the fountain of youth. I waited a while, hung out and read some, and when they came back down and left, I took off up the hill. And this is what I found."
"It really is great. So…untouched, unharmed."
"I know. It reminds me of you." Rory looked over at Jess who continued to stare off into the distance. "I want to say some things and I don't think I can if I have to look you in the eye. I think love you, Rory. But the thing is, I'm not sure if I know how to love and I don't want to give you anything less than what you deserve.
"I was scared at first, to see J.D., but then I realized how much I wanted to see him. And I want to see him again. My dad wasn't there for me, and I don't want J.D. to have my problems. I want him to be normal, or as normal as the product of two teenagers can be. And as Hallmark-cheesy as it sounds, I want to grow up with him and with you.
"But as much as I feel that way, I'm scared as hell that I'll ruin it, or I'll make some colossal mistake to destroy everything. And I don't want to have to deal with the consequences."
Rory didn't know what to say; or, rather, she didn't know where to begin. "I'm just… So what do you mean by all of this?"
"Exactly what it sounds like: I want to be a dad, and I want to see you two regularly. I want the chance to fail instead of passing it up completely." He finally looked at her, sincerity in his eyes.
"Jess, I don't know how I love you, or why, I just know that I do. But I don't want to leave things in the air and so undefined. Can you answer me one question?"
"What?"
"Why did you leave Stars Hollow, without telling me it was for good?"
"If that's not a loaded question…" he trailed off, then thought about his reply. "I didn't know what I was doing, really. I didn't want to have to explain that I wasn't graduating. I loved you, but I didn't know how to tell you. If I could go back in time to any date in the history of the world, I wouldn't meet Churchill or Dickens, or prevent Vietnam or help a Women's Rights Movement. I'd go back to that night, at the party and I'd fix everything. You wouldn't have J.D. now, you'd be at Yale. I would have graduated, and I never would have gone to California. But I can't change any of that now, and at least one good thing came out of it all: J.D."
"I would have helped you, and you know that, but that's the past now. I just hope that if something happens in the future you'll be able to tell me without running away."
"I'll try, but it's tiring, always disappointing people. And I'm serious, about the whole moving back thing. I've already filled out the paperwork to transfer my credits to UConn in Hartford and I've lined up a job at this little off-campus bookstore and Luke wants me to work weekends. You can go to school whenever you want and I'll schedule my classes around you so I can help watch J.D. instead of putting him in constant daycare. I want to make this work, and I want to do everything I can in hopes of making up for my insane stupidity. I love you Rory, and that kid of yours is quickly growing on me."
"You know, I think he likes you a little bit too."
"Really? Couldn't tell with all thee burping and gurgling."
"So we're going to try this? Try to be responsible parents, together?"
"I'm game if you are."
"I'm cold, that's what I am. It must be twenty degrees out here."
"By all means, scooch on over here," Jess held out his arm and Rory accepted the invitation, placing herself snuggly beside him.
"I could live here, see this view everyday."
Ever the sarcastic pessimist, Jess countered her: "The highway noise would wake me up."
"We could build a house with soundproof walls then," Rory said, innocently looking up at him.
"'We'?"
"Well, I don't know about that…"
"Aw, come on, I'm clean, I don't take up much space. Plus, free babysitting."
Rory couldn't believe that they were back to their old selves, even with all the complications. She figured now was the best time as any to test the waters further. "We'll see. My nose is so cold," she said, holding her gloved hand over it.
"Let me try," Jess offered, pulling down her hand and leaning in with a slow, sweet kiss.
"Didn't work," Rory told him with her eyes still closed as they pulled apart.
"Then I guess I'm going to have to take you back to reality." He stood and took her hand, leading her back through the woods to the parking lot. As they neared the truck, Jess stopped and pulled Rory to him and kissed her again. "Just in case," he muttered and they climbed in and headed home, back to Stars Hollow and the future that awaited them.
~*~ To Be Continued ~*~
