Somewhere I Belong
Chapter 18
An hour later, the Blackbird sat quietly in the underground hanger at the Institute, while Shay rested in the large hospital wing housed in the belly of the mansion. Her stats were improving slowly, Ororo or Hank coming in every so often to change her bandages and administer anything she might need. It took her two full days of rest until her eyes finally opened on their own free will.
A few rays of sunshine hit her sore eyes, causing her to squint slightly. Her throat was raw, and for a split second, Shay feared to open her eyes completely, that she would see she was still chained to a cold steel table, doctors hovering over her, talking about her as though she was just an animal. But a familiar voice dismissed all her fears with a few simple words.
"How do you feel, Shay?"
Opening her eyes all the way, Shay looked to her side and saw Xavier smiling at her. Not in a big smiling mood, she cleared her throat and tried to say 'fine' to him, but it came out barely more then a whisper.
"I'm afraid you'll have to wait a little more for your voice to come back. This might help a little." He handed her a small cup of water and Shay pulled herself up to a semi-sitting position. Her wings were sore from her body laying on them, but there wasn't much she could do about it. She accepted the cup from Xavier and took a long drink.
"Thanks," she croaked, handing it back with one hand, the other rubbing her throat. She looked at Xavier, a drowsy feeling washing over her. She settled back down into the pillows, her eyes getting heavy. "How did you find me?"
Sitting back in his chair, Charles folded his hands in his lap. "With the help of the Morlocks."
Shay's eyes popped open from their half-closed state with shock. "What are you talking about?" she mumbled, taking a deep breath.
"Gambit told us about the helmet, so Evan and a few others went to the Alley and asked for Calliban's help in finding you."
"Gambit?" Shay's eyebrows knitted together in confusion.
Xavier's face lightened with a smile. "I believe you're missing a large part of your own story, Shay."
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After Xavier had told her everything he knew about Shay's abduction and rescue, he left her alone for awhile, to rest some more, but Shay was sick of being indoors. After making sure the Professor had left, Shay climbed slowly out of bed and hunted down some clothing, stripping off the semi-hospital gown she was wearing. Covered in a pair of cut-off jeans and a tank top, Shay moved out the door and through the medic unit. She took her time climbing the set of stairs she found and had to sit and rest at the top for a few minutes.
"Not my brightest idea," she muttered to herself and she pushed herself up again and passed through the door into a hall.
"Shay? What in the hell are you doing out here?" Logan's growl caused her to stop in her tracks.
"Shit," she muttered quietly and turned to find Logan standing down the hall from the stairs. "I'm fine, really."
Logan stepped up infront of her and stared at Shay. "Sure you are, that's why you're white as a ghost," he frowned at her. "You should be in bed."
"Jesus, thanks Dad," Shay muttered as she turned to head down the hall anyways. Logan's hand on her shoulder stopped her. She looked back at him over her shoulder, turning slightly to get her wing out of the way.
"Are you feeling ok?"
Shay nodded her head. "Better then before. A little shaky, but I'm fine."
It was Logan's turn to nod his head as he lifted his hand off her shoulder. She began to turn to head back down the hall when she paused and looked at him once more. "Hey Logan. Xavier told me what happened. Everything... Thanks." Shay's eyes gleamed at him.
Logan nodded his head. Only after Shay had turned and started down the hall again did his lips part in a smile.
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It took a few more days until Shay felt good enough to start back with her normal routine. It took the same length of time for everyone to clam down and stop asking her every fifteen minutes if she was feeling fine. It didn't matter though, because she always lied and said she was ok.
Truthfully, Shay felt completely shaken and vulnerable. She felt like an idiot, she felt like a child again and she felt like she'd been violated on every possible plane, though no one knew this outside her own little mind. Feelings she thought she'd never feel again resurfaced in her, weakness and defenselessness, that she actually NEEDED someone again in her life for protection all added to a great weight in her mind and body.
At night, her nightmares of her father were back with a vengeance, except now he had help from doctors covered by surgical masks, their eyes glowing evilly in the darkness. She often woke with a cry, her own eyes searching the corners of her room for hidden killers. Of course she never found anything, but that didn't mean she got any more sleep those nights.
Shay often found herself bombarded by more and more memories she'd keep blocked out of her mind from her childhood at inopportune times. Hank often asked her if she wanted to talk about what happened to her while she was locked up in that building, but she always shook her head and continued with her filing or testing. Xavier's voice would whisper in her mind at dinner if she wanted to talk afterwards in his office, but she'd look to him at the table and shake her head no.
The pain and humiliation would now be a scar in her mind, just as the ones on her body. Large ugly things that would always be with her, always a reminded of letting her guard down, letting weakness show.
It was easy to say that Shay needed someone to help her more now then ever before. Oddly enough, it was Kurt who showed her this. The two were sitting at the long dining table, a chess board set between the two. Kurt was trying to teach Shay how to play, picking up a bishop and explaining that it could only move diagonally around the board.
"Got it?" Kurt smiled at her from across the table.
"Sure," Shay's own smile was a little sad, a normal look for her now-a-days.
Kurt and she fell into silence as they quietly began taking turns, moving their pieces across the board towards each other. Twice Kurt had to set one of Shay's pieces back and shake his head.
After Kurt kicked her tenth piece off the board, Shay gave a small grumble and frowned. "What am I doing wrong?"
Kurt shook his head in amusement and pointed to Shay's only rook left and her Queen. "You can't just keep going at me with one, it won't work. You've gotta work at least another piece with it. It's just about impossible to check-mate a King with only one piece."
Shay lifted her eyes and stared at Kurt. "What did you say?"
Kurt's smile took on a new meaning for Shay. "You can't do it alone," he said, a little naïve to the hidden meaning of his statement.
Shay sat back slightly in her seat and stared mutely at the board, then to all her pieces on one side of the board, and the three pawns of Kurt's she'd been able to knock off.
"Right," Shay said softly, something finally clicking in her mind. Kurt, of course, ended up kicking her ass by the end of the game. He asked if she wanted a re-match but she said she had something else to do.
Kurt packed up the pieces into the folding board while Shay left the room and headed to the Professor's office. She had quite a few things to get off her chest, and she couldn't do that alone.
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Walking alone in the same woods she'd fallen into a few months ago, Shay felt better then she had in years. Her body was almost completely healed from the traumas it had been put though. Her scars were a dark grey compared to her light grey skin, forever a reminder of a low part in her life. Her mind was healing slowly but surely, now aided by Charles Xavier, something she should have started long ago. Although he couldn't help her with everything, simply talking to him had helped her tremendously.
Pulling a leaf off a low branch, Shay heard a loud CRACK as someone else stepped on their own branch. She turned and saw a young man making his way towards her, covered by a long trench coat, two red eyes glancing up at her as he made his way closer. Shay was close to bolting when it suddenly hit her who this boy was.
Gambit.
Waiting for him to draw near enough to talk to him, Shay remembered what Xavier had told her the day she'd woken up, that Gambit might have had an ulterior motive for coming back to the Institute. Her eyes were twinkling slightly, a mischievous gleaming washing over them. She didn't hate him, though his boss was another story. No, Gambit was not a enemy to her, though Shay couldn't explain why she thought that. He'd helped set up the team that had kidnapped her from Xavier's. But something in the back of Shay's mind argued that, if not Gambit, Magneto would have gotten someone else.
Remy looked back at the girl he'd been thinking about off and on ever since leaving Xavier's Institute. The damn girl had caused him more trouble then she was worth, and he'd never even spoken two words to her. He'd remedy that right now though.
"Hello, chere," he winked at her.
"Hello, Gambit," Shay replied, cocking her head to the side to stare at him. He was oddly handsome, she'd give him that. "Still playing Magneto's little messenger boy?"
Gambit's face fell, not taking to well to Shay's sarcasm. "I'm not a messenger."
A sly smile spread over Shay's face. "So, what are you doing here?"
Gambit quieted, glaring at her. "Wanted t'check up on y', chere."
"Well, I'm doing just fine, thanks," Shay scoffed, not believing a word he said. "So if you're not his messenger, what are you? His lackey?"
Gambit's eyes softened a bit, the hard glare disappearing. "We're not talkin' 'bout me, chere."
"Why not?" Shay returned his frown, though for a different reason then he. "The Professor told me that you came here, after-," she stopped herself before mentioning the remains of Alton Lanson. "Instead of going to Magneto," she continued on. "Thanks," she finally chirped, giving him a soft smile.
Gambit paused for a second, then let out a soft laugh. I don' know what dat Professor has been telling y', chere, but I wouldn' believe it all."
Shay's anger flared up and she turned to leave before she did something she'd regret later, but a "Hey, wait!" stopped her. She turned and raised an eyebrow at him. "What?"
"Magneto says... y'spot is still open."
Shay stared at Gambit for a few silent seconds, almost as though she was sizing him up for a fight. Finally a small smile played across her lips. "Tell Magneto he can take my spot and piss off." She turned quickly and began walking back to the mansion. "I'm an X-Men."
The End.
****Notes****
So, how did everyone like it? I hope y'all enjoyed it enough to hang around for the sequel, that is if I ever get it finished. Umm, of course, one last time I have to thank Amy Michelle [dark_english_rose] for helping with Gambit's accent and for being a regular reviewer on this story. Heh. For awhile there, I was basically updating just for her.
Umm... the sequel will focus a lot on Shay's past, and her fixing a few things. It'll take place about a year after this, so she'll be about 19. I've gotten some request, mostly from my friend Ginny, about some kind of relationship, so that might come into play.
I've barely began it, so I'm not even sure what's to happen. I do have another idea churning in the back of my mind for a third installment to the story, but we'll see how well the sequel does before that happens.
Thanks again to all my reviewers!
