Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. Pity, isn't it?
Thanks: jane air, ilovesiriusblack21, Dreamcatcher(I'm actually surprised that you didn't wrote "impossibile" ;) and it still is aelAbaetsch, to your information. kiss, hon. love you.), freaked-out (I'm glad that it's not me alone going insane if I'm bored. Ok, ok, I admit, I'm never sane… *g*), bunnyrabbit228, Vu, Lynn R, Football Babe (I do. Maybe I should be ashamed of that, but I'm not. I love the word 'blub' I can't help it… *g*), hi (hi back ;)).
A/N: Harry is not going to be best friends with Draco. And the conversation they had will stay what it was: A conversation between two people who hate each other, but were bored, and blind, and then you say things, which you would never do in any other case. I'm sorry, but I don't think that they are able to be friends in my story.
The next days went smooth.
They went on ignoring each other when they met in the corridors or at lunch.
Soon the holidays were about to be over and Hogwarts filled again with pupils.
Harry went down to Hogsmead to pick his friends and Hermione up from the station.
He arrived just the same moment as the train did.
"Hullo, Harry!", Ron said while walking down the stairs from hogwarts-express. "Had a good holiday?"
"Yeah, Christmas was fine, but it was so boring. There was no-one else in Hogwarts! Can you believe it?"
Well, there actually was, but Harry didn't think it was necessary to mention it to Ron, because it would only cause any more trouble.
"Where's Hermione, Ron?", he asked his friend while searching for her.
"She'll come soon, she had something to talk to Ginny, what ever. There they are!"
Hermoine ran down the platform to her boyfriend, hugging him tightly.
"Harry, I'm so glad being back here! Do you know how much I missed you? It was hell!"
"Was it?", Harry smiled happily.
"It was.", she kissed him on the lips, but when Ron cleared his mouth they stopped abruptly.
"What is it?"
"I think we'll better get to our carriages."
"You're right."
So they sat off and left the platform, Harry holding hands with Hermione.
When day finally reached the great hall, listened to Dubledore's welcome back speech and filled their stomachs with the fabulous dinner, Harry let Hermione out of his tight grip. When he was, again, in a discussion about Quidditch with his fellow-Gryffindors, Hermione had some time to check wether Draco was there or not.
She figured he wasn't in the great hall, she didn't saw him in any counter of the Slytherin table.
Hermione mentally slapped herself. 'Would you please be so kind as to STOP LOOKING FOR HIM!!'
Hermione felt guilt washing over her, and she moved closer to her boyfriend.
Harry sensed the sudden uneasiness and looked at her questionably.
"Is something the matter with you, hon?"
Hermione just waved aside, but didn't dare to look at him.
Harry took her hand and squeezed it softly.
Harrys gaze met hers, and he smiled warmly at her. His emerald green eyes locked with her browns, and the only thing she could think of, was: 'He hasn't earned this.'
She turned away, slowly standing up, mumbled something about library and left the great hall.
Hermione drew the tears off her cheeks.
"I can't", she whispered, "I just can't…", she whispered the words again and again.
Hermione found herself in an empty corridor. She felt so weak, and so tired.
She crawled to the darkest corner she could find and huddled up, drew her legs close to her body and rested her head into her arms.
In an other dark corner, of the same corridor, stood a young, blonde man.
He was watching the girl cry her heart out, but he couldn't bring himself to go over to her.
He couldn't go on, playing with both of their hearts and their lives. It wasn't a game.
Draco needed all the strength he could afford to stop himself from just kneeling down next to her. Just wrapping his arms around her tightly, stop her pain.
He knew now how it felt if you want to help someone but you can't.
The man in the corner risked another glance to Hermione. When he vanished into the next passageway, he slammed his bare fist into the stonewall. Then he made his way down to his favorite professor's office.
"Professor Snape, may I enter?", he said, while knocking on the door.
Snape sighed. Draco hadn't visited him for quiet some time now.
"Sure. What brings you down to the dungeons again, Mr. Malfoy?"
"Nothing special. I just needed the company of you."
Snape grinned, but remained silent.
"Ok, to be honest, I needed the company of ANYone! I'm really glad I have my own room now, but it's so… quiet."
"Yeah, I know. Had nice holidays?"
"Yeah, I guess so. I've had a lot of time to learn. And… to sort things out."
Snape looked up from the sheet of parchment he was reading.
"Have you changed your mind?"
"No."
Again, Draco's teacher sighed. "You're both: clever and stupid."
Draco looked at him puzzled. "Am I?"
"Clever, because you know, what might happen to both of you. And stupid, because you care."
"Do you really think I should NOT care? If it were only for me, if the danger would only affect me… But I can't risk it. I thought, we talked about that before. Why can't you just leave it?? I thought you believed me, when I told you the last night we were talking."
"I know, but the last night you didn't gave me a chance to say anything against it. Listen to me, Draco. I don't mind if you don't believe me, because as you have told me some time ago, I don't even have a life. But I have to try it, ok? Will you listen to me?"
"Ok."
"I know, you're afraid. Maybe because more than one thing. I can't make your fear go away. But you've hurt her already. And you can't take her the chance for the decision.
I don't say the fear isn't there. But maybe you both need each other. Do you really think, Hermione wouldn't be in danger just because you refused to love her? We're all in danger. But maybe love could ease fear, pain and danger."
"How do you know? What if it doesn't? Have you ever had the experience of love?"
"You should know, Draco. Don't tell me, you couldn't feel the strong alliance between the two of you. Don't tell me you didn't feel like you were new born in the sweet night when she told you about her feelings. Don't tell me you didn't sense the magic, a different magic from our one, attracted you close to her. Don't tell me, that every time you look into her eyes, the rest of the world don't vanished, and everything else would be even worth notice.
Don't tell me you didn't feel like wrapping your arms around her, every time you see her. You want to kiss her, if you just see those adorable lips of hers. You even want to withdraw a hair if it falls down her face. And if you see her cry, you want to cry by yourself. You want nothing more than to wipe off those awful salty teardrops which are disturbing her beautiful face."
Draco was speechless. He was right. But how could he know?
"I've experienced love once. And only once in a lifetime you are able to know such a strong affection. And you have to realize that everything, everything, should be worth to love this girl."
"Because she is worth everything, I don't. If she's worth everything, than she would be also worth to sacrifice everything. I'll give her my life. I love her, and that's the reason why she must not know it. Can't you understand that??", Draco was mad at him.
"I can. I did the same.", Snape said, awful quiet and calm. "But now I know it was a mistake. I just don't want you to repeat it."
Draco thought about it. They just sat there for a while, then he got up.
"I promise, I'll think about it. Good night, professor."
"Good night, Draco."
Draco left for his dorms, he was confused.
'Will it ever stop, this endless thinking?'
But deep inside himself there was the answer.
'It will. When you've accept that you two need to be together.'
A/N: hmmm… I'm here again? *g* sorry for not updating quiet a while (it were just some days, but I'm sorry anyway.) So, I'm sure you remember the conversation between Snape and Draco (Chapter 19) this is something like a sequel to it. Because I thought, that Snape also should have the right to speak up.
Whatever, I hope you liked it, because even if you think it makes Snape OOC, I think it's nice to know that he is able to feel emotion, after all. ;-)
