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Absolute Firefighter ~ Chapter -- 10
Not even an hour later, Ruth Johnson stormed off of the elevator and down the hallway of the floor that the burn unit was located on. Like a woman on a mission directly from God himself, she headed straight for her husbands room. Reaching her destination, she entered with every intention in the world to lay into him like never before. Her vocal cords weren't even ready to produce a sound, before she bit her tounge to keep quiet. He looked up at her and she read the defeated, heartbroken look on his face, through the clear mask that still covered it .
"I don't know what's wrong with me." he said quiety, from where he sat up on the bed, "I would never say that to her. Why did I say that?!"
"That's what I want to know." Ruth replied.
His eyes were scanning the room, as if the walls hid answers to his internal questions, "I just.....I dunno....."
"You're miserable. You won't let anyone help you, you're stubborn, selfish, AND Irish. It finally kicked you in your ass." Ruth blurted out.
Feeling tears coming, he took the mask off his face and put it on the bed next to him. He wiped his eyes carefully, "I know and I gotta fix it."
"Then fix it," Ruth said firmly. She knew that her husband was sorry, and he realized what he had done. It still didn't take away anything from the actuality of what he said, and how bad it affected their daughter, "Figure out what you need to do and get it overwith. Until you do I have a sobbing daughter I need to get home to."
"I didn't realize I said what I said until it had come out. Then she shot right back at me. I'm just....so mad....all the time."
"Who are you mad at? Are you mad at us, at the doctors, at yourself or what?!" Ruth asked.
"Taylor." he answered quietly, "And I'm mad at myself. I keep replaying it in my head, I keep thinking about what I should have done.....and I didn't."
Ruth sighed, "If you're mad at her, that's one thing, if you're still blaming yourself that's another. I'm not going to sit here and keep telling you that you have to stop blaming yourself, because it's obviously not working."
"I didn't mean to yell at Bridgette. I'm just so mad......then she got me started. I never meant to hurt her," his hand started to shake, as he felt tears coming fast, "I lost Taylor and now I lost Bridgette too."
Being caught off guard by her husbands sudden outpouring of emotions, Ruth was at a loss for words. She sat down on the bed and held his hand while he cried, "Listen to me. Taylor's gone and there's nothing you can do about it ok? You didn't lose Bridgette. Yeah she's pissed off and she's upset, but she'll get over it. You did not lose her."
He swallowed his tears, "I screwed up. I screwed up to you, to Bridge, the guys, everyone."
"No you didn't!" Ruth exclaimed, "You didn't screw up, to anyone. Do you hear me?"
He paused for a minute trying to get rid of his tears, "Why do I feel like it then?"
"Honey, it's natural," Ruth said, "You've been through alot, more than any of us combined. You've just gotta think about getting better now, that's it. Nothing else."
"I know," he then let out a sigh, "I can't believe I said that, and I can't believe what she said back to me."
"Both of you should be ashamed of what you said, period. She may be home crying, but don't think I didn't lay into her for what she said to you." Ruth said firmly.
"I deserved it," Lieu replied.
"Stop it, alright? I'll talk to Bridgette when I get home, it'll be fine. Just do what you have to do." Ruth said.
"She's not gonna talk to me." He said, "I tried her a cell a few times."
"Considering she's just as stubborn and hot headed as you are, I would think it'll take her a few more days." Ruth replied.
Lieu closed his eyes, and let his head sink into the pillow while he let out a sigh, "I just want to talk to her. I can't do this without you two."
"I know. And I'll tell her that, but you know she's gonna need a few days to calm down." Ruth said, "Just get yourself together, and work to get better. When Bridgette's ready she'll be back here."
"Yeah...." he trailed off.
"I mean it." Ruth said firmly.
"I know." he answered.
She gave his hand a slight squeeze, and then realized she promised her daughter that she wouldn't there that long, "I'm gonna go. Unless you need me to stay."
"No no, go, make sure she's ok." he replied.
"Ok," she said leaning in and kissing him twice on his cheek, "I love you."
"Love you too." he replied, as she pulled away.
"I'll be back later." she said standing up.
"Ok." he answered, "Bye."
"Bye." she said walking out of the room, finally able to understand.
~*~
Bridgette laid in her room staring up at the ceiling, while tears still fell from her face. Several hours ago, Ruth had come back from the hospital and they had a long talk.....
"You know he didn't mean it right?" Ruth asked running her hand through her daughter's hair.
Bridgette didn't answer, she just layed there with her face down in the pillow.
"Bridge, he didn't. You know he's not doing well at all, and he needs us right now." Ruth said softly.
Bridgette tilted her head to face her mother, her eyes were spewing anger and hurt, "Then why did he say that?"
"Bridgete, you need to listen to me. Neither one of us have any idea what he's going through. And that's not an excuse for what he said, but he's sorry and he didn't mean it. He would never do anything to hurt you, you know that." Ruth said.
"Yeah well that hurt," Bridgette mumbled, "I know that he's going through alot, but he shouldn't be blaming himself for what happened to Taylor."
Ruth continued to stroke Bridgette's hair, "You know what it's like when they lose one of their own. He couldn't go to her funeral Bridge, and he's not over the fact that she's gone yet."
Bridgette sighed, as she burried her head back in the pillow and allowed her mother's common sense and understanding to sink into her head.
"I understand that you're mad. I'm sure you're very mad, but he didn't mean it Bridgette. You just have to accept that." Ruth said, "And you need to suck up whatever pride you have and appologize. What you said wasn't very far from what he did. And if you feel this crappy right now, imagine how he feels."
Bridgette nodded slowly into the pillow before mumbling, "I don't wanna talk to him right now."
"I know," Ruth said rubbing her daughter's back, "You can't avoid him forever though."
"I can try." Bridgette replied.
"You don't mean that." Ruth said.
Bridgette didn't answer.
"When you calm down a little more you'll feel differently," Ruth explained. She paused for a minute realizing she had nothing else to say to her daughter to try and change her mind, "Come on, get out of bed let's go take a walk or something."
"I don't want to." Bridgette mumbled.
"What are you gonna stay in bed all day?" Ruth asked.
She nodded into her pillow.
"What's that going to accomplish?!" Ruth exclaimed.
Bridgette turned away from the pillow and looked at her mother, "It's going to accomplish me getting some piece of mind. I don't want to be at the hospital sitting in the waiting room or getting bitched at. I wanna be here, in my room, in my house for more than 5 hours for a change."
Slightly shocked by her daughter's answer, Ruth quietly replied, "Alright. If that's what you want."
......Ruth returned to the hospital hours later, and Bridgette remained in her bedroom, with her face down crying. She was still incredibly hurt, although he didn't mean it, those words did infact pass through her father's lips. She was even more hurt by what she said back to him. It was as if she didn't have control at the time, and her words just flew out of her mouth with no stopping them. Sniffling, she turned her head and faced the window, watching the rain drizzle down. She heard footsteps come down the hallway, and then stop outside of her door. Her bedroom door which wasn't closed all the way, was then pushed open completely by the head of one of her dogs. Both labradors entered and walked over to her bed.
"Hi babies." Bridgette sniffled, as Smokey jumped up on the bed next to her while Chief made himself comfortable on the floor.
Smokey settled down on the bed right next to Bridgette while she continued to cry. The dog let out a small whimper and licked her face. Bridgette wiped the slobber from her face and then hugged her dog. She let go when her cell phone started to ring again. Lifting it up off the nightstand next to her, she began to cry harder when she recognized the number and placed it back down. When it stopped ringing it flashed "7 missed calls" all from the same number, her father's hospital room. She hadn't answered a call from him all day, and didn't plan on it for the time being.
Absolute Firefighter ~ Chapter -- 10
Not even an hour later, Ruth Johnson stormed off of the elevator and down the hallway of the floor that the burn unit was located on. Like a woman on a mission directly from God himself, she headed straight for her husbands room. Reaching her destination, she entered with every intention in the world to lay into him like never before. Her vocal cords weren't even ready to produce a sound, before she bit her tounge to keep quiet. He looked up at her and she read the defeated, heartbroken look on his face, through the clear mask that still covered it .
"I don't know what's wrong with me." he said quiety, from where he sat up on the bed, "I would never say that to her. Why did I say that?!"
"That's what I want to know." Ruth replied.
His eyes were scanning the room, as if the walls hid answers to his internal questions, "I just.....I dunno....."
"You're miserable. You won't let anyone help you, you're stubborn, selfish, AND Irish. It finally kicked you in your ass." Ruth blurted out.
Feeling tears coming, he took the mask off his face and put it on the bed next to him. He wiped his eyes carefully, "I know and I gotta fix it."
"Then fix it," Ruth said firmly. She knew that her husband was sorry, and he realized what he had done. It still didn't take away anything from the actuality of what he said, and how bad it affected their daughter, "Figure out what you need to do and get it overwith. Until you do I have a sobbing daughter I need to get home to."
"I didn't realize I said what I said until it had come out. Then she shot right back at me. I'm just....so mad....all the time."
"Who are you mad at? Are you mad at us, at the doctors, at yourself or what?!" Ruth asked.
"Taylor." he answered quietly, "And I'm mad at myself. I keep replaying it in my head, I keep thinking about what I should have done.....and I didn't."
Ruth sighed, "If you're mad at her, that's one thing, if you're still blaming yourself that's another. I'm not going to sit here and keep telling you that you have to stop blaming yourself, because it's obviously not working."
"I didn't mean to yell at Bridgette. I'm just so mad......then she got me started. I never meant to hurt her," his hand started to shake, as he felt tears coming fast, "I lost Taylor and now I lost Bridgette too."
Being caught off guard by her husbands sudden outpouring of emotions, Ruth was at a loss for words. She sat down on the bed and held his hand while he cried, "Listen to me. Taylor's gone and there's nothing you can do about it ok? You didn't lose Bridgette. Yeah she's pissed off and she's upset, but she'll get over it. You did not lose her."
He swallowed his tears, "I screwed up. I screwed up to you, to Bridge, the guys, everyone."
"No you didn't!" Ruth exclaimed, "You didn't screw up, to anyone. Do you hear me?"
He paused for a minute trying to get rid of his tears, "Why do I feel like it then?"
"Honey, it's natural," Ruth said, "You've been through alot, more than any of us combined. You've just gotta think about getting better now, that's it. Nothing else."
"I know," he then let out a sigh, "I can't believe I said that, and I can't believe what she said back to me."
"Both of you should be ashamed of what you said, period. She may be home crying, but don't think I didn't lay into her for what she said to you." Ruth said firmly.
"I deserved it," Lieu replied.
"Stop it, alright? I'll talk to Bridgette when I get home, it'll be fine. Just do what you have to do." Ruth said.
"She's not gonna talk to me." He said, "I tried her a cell a few times."
"Considering she's just as stubborn and hot headed as you are, I would think it'll take her a few more days." Ruth replied.
Lieu closed his eyes, and let his head sink into the pillow while he let out a sigh, "I just want to talk to her. I can't do this without you two."
"I know. And I'll tell her that, but you know she's gonna need a few days to calm down." Ruth said, "Just get yourself together, and work to get better. When Bridgette's ready she'll be back here."
"Yeah...." he trailed off.
"I mean it." Ruth said firmly.
"I know." he answered.
She gave his hand a slight squeeze, and then realized she promised her daughter that she wouldn't there that long, "I'm gonna go. Unless you need me to stay."
"No no, go, make sure she's ok." he replied.
"Ok," she said leaning in and kissing him twice on his cheek, "I love you."
"Love you too." he replied, as she pulled away.
"I'll be back later." she said standing up.
"Ok." he answered, "Bye."
"Bye." she said walking out of the room, finally able to understand.
~*~
Bridgette laid in her room staring up at the ceiling, while tears still fell from her face. Several hours ago, Ruth had come back from the hospital and they had a long talk.....
"You know he didn't mean it right?" Ruth asked running her hand through her daughter's hair.
Bridgette didn't answer, she just layed there with her face down in the pillow.
"Bridge, he didn't. You know he's not doing well at all, and he needs us right now." Ruth said softly.
Bridgette tilted her head to face her mother, her eyes were spewing anger and hurt, "Then why did he say that?"
"Bridgete, you need to listen to me. Neither one of us have any idea what he's going through. And that's not an excuse for what he said, but he's sorry and he didn't mean it. He would never do anything to hurt you, you know that." Ruth said.
"Yeah well that hurt," Bridgette mumbled, "I know that he's going through alot, but he shouldn't be blaming himself for what happened to Taylor."
Ruth continued to stroke Bridgette's hair, "You know what it's like when they lose one of their own. He couldn't go to her funeral Bridge, and he's not over the fact that she's gone yet."
Bridgette sighed, as she burried her head back in the pillow and allowed her mother's common sense and understanding to sink into her head.
"I understand that you're mad. I'm sure you're very mad, but he didn't mean it Bridgette. You just have to accept that." Ruth said, "And you need to suck up whatever pride you have and appologize. What you said wasn't very far from what he did. And if you feel this crappy right now, imagine how he feels."
Bridgette nodded slowly into the pillow before mumbling, "I don't wanna talk to him right now."
"I know," Ruth said rubbing her daughter's back, "You can't avoid him forever though."
"I can try." Bridgette replied.
"You don't mean that." Ruth said.
Bridgette didn't answer.
"When you calm down a little more you'll feel differently," Ruth explained. She paused for a minute realizing she had nothing else to say to her daughter to try and change her mind, "Come on, get out of bed let's go take a walk or something."
"I don't want to." Bridgette mumbled.
"What are you gonna stay in bed all day?" Ruth asked.
She nodded into her pillow.
"What's that going to accomplish?!" Ruth exclaimed.
Bridgette turned away from the pillow and looked at her mother, "It's going to accomplish me getting some piece of mind. I don't want to be at the hospital sitting in the waiting room or getting bitched at. I wanna be here, in my room, in my house for more than 5 hours for a change."
Slightly shocked by her daughter's answer, Ruth quietly replied, "Alright. If that's what you want."
......Ruth returned to the hospital hours later, and Bridgette remained in her bedroom, with her face down crying. She was still incredibly hurt, although he didn't mean it, those words did infact pass through her father's lips. She was even more hurt by what she said back to him. It was as if she didn't have control at the time, and her words just flew out of her mouth with no stopping them. Sniffling, she turned her head and faced the window, watching the rain drizzle down. She heard footsteps come down the hallway, and then stop outside of her door. Her bedroom door which wasn't closed all the way, was then pushed open completely by the head of one of her dogs. Both labradors entered and walked over to her bed.
"Hi babies." Bridgette sniffled, as Smokey jumped up on the bed next to her while Chief made himself comfortable on the floor.
Smokey settled down on the bed right next to Bridgette while she continued to cry. The dog let out a small whimper and licked her face. Bridgette wiped the slobber from her face and then hugged her dog. She let go when her cell phone started to ring again. Lifting it up off the nightstand next to her, she began to cry harder when she recognized the number and placed it back down. When it stopped ringing it flashed "7 missed calls" all from the same number, her father's hospital room. She hadn't answered a call from him all day, and didn't plan on it for the time being.
