Grissom paced his bedroom unable to sleep. He wished that he could just relax like he had promised Sara he would, but he couldn't. His mind raced with a thousand different thoughts, eventually taking him to the one place he desperately needed to be. By Sara's side.

His cell phone rang suddenly, breaking him out of his thoughts to bring him back to the present. With a heavy sigh, he reached for it to flip it open and place it to his ear. "Grissom."

"Griss, it's Warrick. Where are you?"

"Uh, I'm at home. I promised Sara I'd try and get some sleep, but that's proving to be difficult," he sighed.

"Listen, I could really do with your help. I told Cath to go home. We've just found our bomber."

"Excuse me? Bomber?" Grissom asked confused, "What bomber?"

"Oh God, I'm sorry, you were with Sara. The explosion was caused by what we think was a parcel bomb sent to Catherine."

"What?" Grissom gasped, running a hand over his forehead tiredly, "Okay, where are you? You can tell me everything when I get there."

Catherine walked in through the hospitals sliding door. Her mind was swimming with guilt, as if in some way she was responsible for what happened to her friends. Coming up to the nurse's station, she stopped beside the woman at the desk.     " I know it's late," she sighed, " but can I sit with my friend Sara Sidle for a while?"

"We don't usually permit visitors at this late hour unless it's the husband," she sighed, "but she's been quite unsettled for the last few hours. So okay," she smiled, "but only for half an hour."

"That's all I need," Catherine nodded tearfully as she turned away from the nurse to walk towards Sara's room.

Sara tried to move to a spot that was comfortable, but every time she moved she paid the price with shots of pain. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes again, wishing that Grissom were here beside her.

"Hey," a soft voice spoke from the doorway, causing Sara to look up.

"Cath," she gasped, "what's wrong? Is it Lindsey?"

"No, no," stepping closer into the room, Catherine came to sit on the chair beside Sara's bed. She tried to swallow the intense emotions that threatened to spill over onto her cheeks, but they came regardless causing Sara to watch her worriedly.

"What's the matter?" she asked quietly, biting back the sting of pain that erupted inside her abdomen. Reaching out towards her friend, she grasped her hand tightly resulting in Catherine looking up at her. "Cath?"

"I…" Catherine started, her voice shaking as she spoke, "I'm sorry."

Sara watched her intently, her own emotions rearing up inside her eyes as she swallowed the tears back into her throat. "I don't know why you're apologizing," she whispered, " but you don't have anything to be sorry for."

"I blamed you for Eddie's death," Catherine blurted tearfully, "I said some awful things to you that are just unforgivable."

"And then you took them back," Sara told her as a single tear broke free to roll down her face. "It doesn't matter anymore."

"Yes it does matter," Catherine sniffed, clasping tightly onto her hand. "I made you doubt your abilities. I caused you to believe that I didn't trust you."

"Cath," Sara started slowly, trying to think of the right words to say. Taking a shuddered breath, she closed her eyes as more tears leaked out from the corner of her closed lids. "I don't deserve your trust, I let you down."

"No, honey," Catherine told her firmly, bringing up her other hand to join her other one to clasp tightly onto Sara's. "You didn't let me down. I was the one, it was my fault." Taking a deep breath, she calmed her voice as she spoke through her emotions. "I almost lost Lindsey, but you saved her life. You were willing to sacrifice yourself for her."

"I did what had to be done," Sara told her, "We were both so scared."

"I'm sorry," Catherine whispered.

"I couldn't let you lose her too," Sara told her tearfully, "I couldn't let her die. I know we've never really been good friends Cath, but I didn't want you to hate me anymore."

"Hate you?" Catherine gasped, "Oh honey I don't hate you. I've never hated you." Getting up from the chair, she reached over to pull Sara into a hug. "You saved my daughters life, yet you almost died because of the things I had said to you."

"I'm sorry," Sara whispered into Catherine's shoulder, her own emotions rampaging through her heart. "I tried to find the evidence for you. I really did."

"I know," Catherine sobbed as they pulled away from each other, keeping their hands joined. "I'm so sorry."

"You have a great kid, you know that?" Sara sniffed, "She saved my life too. She made me promise to fight."

"Yeah, she was screaming for us to let her come back for you." Looking down towards their clasped hands, Catherine squeezed her fingers gently, "I owe you so much."

"You don't owe me anything."

"I do," she nodded tearfully, "you kept my daughter alive, you gave her hope and I will never forget that. Never."

"You'd have done the same for me," Sara whispered.

"You know one day you're going to be a wonderful mother," Catherine told her with a smile.

"I doubt that," she chuckled sadly, "I need to find a man first."

"Oh I think you've already found him Sara," Catherine told her knowingly. "He refused to leave your side."

Closing her eyes against the fresh onslaught of tears that threatened to engulf her once more, Sara shook her head. "Maybe he'll think differently when I'm out of here."

"I don't think so Sara."

"I wish I could believe you Cath," she whispered, "but I know from experience that when I get too close to him, he runs away as fast as he can. He's been wonderful though, problem is I'm scared he'll change his mind about me," she smiled tearfully. "I've had a small glimpse of how good we could be together, but what if he has his usual selective amnesia when I'm well again?"

"Honey, I've known him a long time. He loves you, don't ever doubt that."

"I don't doubt it Cath," she sighed, "I'm just trying to prepare myself for his denial"

"He won't risk losing you again Sara," Catherine told her firmly. "I have seen him go through so many different trials in his life, but when he thought he had lost you…" closing her eyes against the memory, she took a deep breath before continuing. "I accused him of not caring for anyone. I didn't realize until Warrick brought you out, just how wrong I had been."

"Warrick brought me out?" Sara asked, her eyes flooding with tears, "He was supposed to take Lindsey and leave, he promised me he would get her back to you."

"And he did," Catherine told her, "he gave Lindsey to some rescue workers and then went back for you."

"I didn't want him to die, he shouldn't have risked his life for me." Shaking her head, Sara tried to remember what had happened when Lindsey had disappeared into the safety of Warricks arms. The images hit her with a strength that almost knocked her sideways. "I remember telling him he had to leave," she whispered, her voice strained against the memories. "I thought I was going to die. I was prepared to die."

"Don't talk that way," Catherine gasped, "do you really think any of us could survive losing you?"

"I…"

"Your loss would break Gil's heart, not to mention everyone else who loves you," Catherine told her firmly. "You have so many people who adore you Sara. I don't think you realize just how many."

"I think I know," Sara smiled sadly, "It took an explosion to make it clear, but I know now."

Catherine shook visibly at Sara's words, knowing that she would have to tell Sara the truth of what had happened eventually. Through her tiredness, Sara shook Catherine's hands, causing her to turn her eyes towards her.

"What's wrong?" Sara asked worriedly.

"We found the cause of the explosion," Catherine sighed, closing her eyes to keep the haunting images from her mind. "There was a package."

"Yeah, it was in the break room," Sara nodded, casting her mind back. "Pretty big too, oh…." Turning her eyes towards Catherine, she nodded with recognition, "Cath, it was for you."

Nodding her head, Catherine couldn't keep the emotions from swelling inside her eyes to escape down her cheeks. "He's a 16 year old kid Sara," she whispered in a shuddering gasp, "and he called me to gloat about it, I didn't know what to do."

"Oh God," Sara groaned, her voice catching on a sob as she spoke. "Why? What did he want with you? I don't understand."

"Brass arrested him an hour ago," Catherine sniffed, "he had photo's of me and Lindsey in his room  Sara. He was watching us and I didn't know." Her voice broke as she spoke, allowing tumbling emotions to fall from her eyes. "He could have killed everyone I care about and I didn't know."

"It's okay," Sara whispered brokenly, tugging her friend down into a healing embrace. "It's not your fault," she told her through her own tears, "we're all going to survive this."

Shaking her head against Sara's shoulder, Catherine gulped for air as she poured out the intense guilt that had been eating away at her heart for so long. Her sobs shook Sara's body, the tremors causing the stinging in her body to stir into wakefulness, but she gasped back the pain, unwilling to let it surface. "Lindsey's a great kid," she whispered, trying to lighten the tone in the room. "She wouldn't let me give up and I'm not going to let you give up either."

Catherine pulled back, lifting herself up into a sitting position. Moving a hand from Sara's, she swiped at her face with her fingers. "Okay," she whispered sadly.

"You have to do what you do best Cath," Sara told her, swallowing the pain that had started to soar through her lower body. "You have to keep everyone grounded."

"And you have to believe that you and Gil are going to be wonderful together," Catherine chuckled sadly, her voice hiccupping slightly. Reaching out for Sara's hand again, she watched her carefully, noticing that she had paled slightly. "Honey are you okay?"

Drawing in a ragged breath, Sara grasped her hand tightly,  "Hurts."

"Oh God," Catherine gasped, leaping off of the bed. "Shall I call your nurse?"

"No S'ok," Sara muttered, "Pain meds are wearing off."

"Honey let me find your nurse," Catherine told her, pulling her hands from Sara's and heading out of the door.

TBC…..