The intro movie disturbed Kenta. The shadowy figure stalking the town and killing unscrupulously was a menace to society. The devil-like fiend with the eye in the center of his (its?) head was creepy. The haunting music made his skin crawl.

Saori, on the other hand, was captivated. The master thief sneaking around and dispensing with his enemies was always one step ahead of the law. That devil guy with the eyeball was wicked (the good kind of wicked, apparently). And the music…truly, "cool" was the most appropriate adjective.

Dante liked the thief's attitude. And he thought that the last part of the theme song sounded like it should come from a subway. He made this decision despite the fact that he had never in his life been in a subway and had absolutely no idea what one sounded like. And that devil's tail was pretty funny, twitching like that of a cat warming itself in a ray of sunlight.

Can we all agree that his mind worked in strange and mysterious ways?

After the movie introducing them to Garrett, our heroes found themselves in the Keeper's compound. Kenta patiently waited through the Keeper's speech before insisting that they memorize all the controls. "We have to do this right," he said. Twenty minutes later found him pressing various keys and saying things like, "Oh, this is crouch" and "How do you lean, again?"

Saori was yelling withering insults in his ear and demanding that they just play the game. "All the best gamers have intuition about controls. You don't."

Dante removed his head from where it had been buried in his hands. "Are we going to play or are we going to argue? Look, we can split them up. I'll handle the weapons and the inventory. You do the movement, Kenta, and Saori, you get the mouse." To his surprise and relief, they agreed.

Things progressed just a bit more smoothly from there. Saori had to restrain herself from wrenching the keyboard from Kenta when he took ten minutes to cross the training room without making noise.

They did learn that Saori was a crack shot with a bow. Of course, Dante kept switching weapons while she was aiming, just because it amused him. That stopped rather quickly after she pulled his chair out from under him and threatened to beat him over the head with it.

They finished the training level with as little violence as was humanly possible (for these particular humans, anyway).

Another argument ensued when they tried to decide which difficulty level to play for the first level. Saori argued (vehemently, of course) that they should play it on expert. Kenta, not an experienced gamer, voted for the easy option. Dante just wanted to play, dammit. Finally, it was Saori's control over the mouse and repeated vows of vengeance if she didn't get her way that decided the matter. They would play on expert.

They found themselves on a cobbled street in the middle of the night. "What's that eerie music?" Kenta asked.

Saori leaned closer to the speakers. "I hear voices."

Dante grinned. "She's hearing voices again. Get the straitjacket."

"They're coming from the building, you simpering idiot!"

Dante leaned closer to Kenta. "I'm glad the flames spewing from her mouth are only figurative," he whispered.

"I heard that!"

Kenta turned the volume up. "Let's go say hello," he suggested.

She fought the urge to slap him. "Whaddya think this is, a chat room? We're a thief."

"That is not proper English."

Dante laughed. "Bear festival…that's priceless."

"Where's my sword?" Saori asked.

"Couldn't we try a diplomatic approach?"

"No, Kenta. Just no."

Kenta pressed the arrow keys. "Then let's go this way instead," he said, making Garrett walk to the left of the building.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"There's no need for confrontation."

"Check the map."

"But—"

"Do it now!"

"Okay, okay. Um…what key is it?"

Saori leaned over and pressed it for him. "Look, moron, it's a dead end."

"Oopsie."

"Bring us about. Lieutenant, ready a photon torpedo."

Dante brought out the broadhead arrows. "Aye, Captain," he said with a grin, playing along with her Star Trek fantasy.

"Crouch and lean so we can see inside," she said as they approached the doorway. By some combination of luck and…more luck, Kenta pressed the right keys.

Dante looked over at her. "Um…you're not planning on taking all of them out at once, are you?"

"I wish I had my lightsaber," she mumbled. "And Force Lightning."

Kenta cleared his throat. "Perhaps stealth would be a wiser approach."

"Well, seeing as how I'm stuck with these primitive weapons…but you will go faster than a crawl."

"An acceptable course of action."

A minute or two later, they saw a servant come around a corner. "Ah, the first kill of the night," Saori said, drawing back the bow.

Dante switched to the blackjack before she could shoot. "Uh-uh-uh. No killing, remember?"

Bloodlust caught Saori. She hijacked the keyboard, switched to the sword, and pounced on the defenseless servant, landing a quick blow to his head. "Thank you," the servant said before collapsing.

Dante burst out laughing. "He…thanked…you," he said, wiping tears from his eyes.

"That's slightly disturbing," Kenta said. A giant skull appeared on the screen. "Well done. What part of 'no killing' did you not comprehend?"

"I'm okay now. Let's try it again."

This time, Kenta tried to strike up a conversation with the guards at the front door. To make a long story short, Garrett ended up becoming a human pincushion, courtesy of the archer.

"I told you," Saori remarked matter-of-factly.

I have an idea. Let's try not getting killed," Dante said.

"You think?!"

"Every so often," he said, grinning.

"A guard's coming!" Kenta shrieked. While his friends had been talking, he had restarted the level and had almost made it to the back entrance of the manor. Then a guard had turned the corner, carrying a sword and humming a tune. In Kenta's panic, he had neglected to hide Garrett in the shadows.

His cry snapped the others to attention. "Quick! Get out of the way!" Dante said.

"I need a weapon!" Saori said at the same time.

But it was too late. The guard had them. It was all over.

"Hey, how's it goin'?" the guard asked as he passed by casually.

The three players sat in stunned silence for a moment.

"My goodness. He didn't kill us."

"He must pay for his insolence!"

"Ah ha ha ha ha ha!"

I think I'll let you guess who said what.

Anyway, they made it into the water-filled tunnel beneath the manor. The spiders in the cave frightened Kenta so badly that he had to cover his eyes. He had Dante cover his ears for him. "Too much hissing," he moaned. Then he nearly had a heart attack when they entered the manor and heard Garrett's voice materialize without warning.

Saori gave him a Look. "I don't think you should play this."

Kenta struggled to return his heartbeat to normal levels. "I'm…just…fine," he squeaked.

Neither of his companions believed him.

Just as he mustered up the courage to put his fingers back on the keyboard, a loud knock resonated through the basement. He jumped. "What was that?"

"Dante, get up here!" a thin voice called.

Dante stood up. "I have to go say good-bye to my relatives. They're going to the hotel for the night." He rolled his eyes. "Too bad they'll be back tomorrow."

"We'll be back as well," Saori said.

"Then I'll be front."

"An idiot, that's what you'll be."

"I'm not sure," Kenta said, frowning. "This game seems awfully violent."

"Oh please. Grow up already."

"Then again," he said, ignoring her completely, "perhaps it will improve. Yes, I'll come here tomorrow."

So ended their first encounter with Thief. Unaware that their lives were already tainted, that the descent into chaos had begun, that resistance was futile, they parted ways.


Author's Notes:

Once again, feedback is welcome.

I have big plans for these three…they each get to go crazy in their own special way. Y'know, there's a reason Thief is rated M for mature. It's a bad, bad game…just look at what it's doing to my poor, innocent characters (except for Saori, who's not innocent at all…keep her away from explosives).

^__^