One word: Ayapunzel.

Weiß Kreuz Fairy Tales

Written by Sakki-san

I don't own Schwartz. Or Weiss. Or the story Rapunzel.

Happy Birthday, Min. (This is her birthday present.)

Farfie: ONCE UPON A TIME I LIVED IN A LAKE OF FIRE!!!!

Crawford: This is getting annoying.

Ken: CHEESE.

Crawford: So is that.

Omi: Once upon a time, there was a young man who lived in a tower.

Ken: MADE OF CHEESE

Crawford: *WHACK*

Ken: X_X

Omi: THANK you, Crawford.

Crawford: *waves steel 2 by 4* You're welcome.

Omi: So this young man, named Ayapunzel –

Aya: WHAT?!!

Omi: ^^;;; Calm down, Aya-kun…Ayapunzel lived in a tall tower. He had nobody to talk to except himself…

Yohji: And the voices in his head.

Aya: *growl…*

Schu: One of them being me!

Omi: No, not yet. Now, there was this marshmallow, see?

Nagi: …no, I don't.

Farfie: AND IT WAS FLUFFY AND YUMMY AND COVERED IN ARTIFICIALLY COLORED SUGAR!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! ARTIFICIAL FOOD COLORING IS SO WEIRD BECAUSE IT'S JUST THERE AND IT'S BLUE!!! BLUE, DAMMIT, BLUUUEEE!!!!!!!!!!

Crawford: *WHACK*

Farfie: x_x

Omi: Thank you again, Crawford.

Crawford: It's my job.

Nagi: I thought you were the leader of Schwartz…

Crawford: That too.

Omi: So there was this tower, and in it lived a young man named Ayapunzel, and he couldn't get down.

Aya: What are you talking about? *climbing down*

Omi: !!! Get back in the tower!

Aya: No.

Omi: Crawford…

Crawford: *aims*

Aya: IEEE!!! NO!! *scrambles back in* I don't want a stick up my ass like yours, Crawford!

Crawford: -_-

Omi: He waited for so long for someone to come and save him! 

Schu: *on a horse* …I don't like this…

Omi: Just relax, it's Nagi and Farfie in a horse suit.

Schu: (o.0) WHAT?!!!

Omi: …erm…anyway…Ayapunzel had incredibly long eartails.

Aya: o-o…these are really long… *poke poke*

Omi: THEN one day, a young man came along on a horse!

Schu: …..Hi.

Omi: He looked up the tower and saw Ayapunzel up there, leaning out over the windowsill.

Aya: _@_…

Schu: AYAPUNZEL, AYAPUNZEL, LET DOWN YOUR LONG EARTAILS!!!

Aya: -_-…

Omi: Ayapunzel looked out the window and at Schuldich.

Schu: ^_^ Come on…I can save you this way!

Aya: You climb up? There's no doors and one bed.

Schu: ^_^….

Aya: I know what you're planning.

Schu: _! Oh well. LET DOWN YOUR LONG EARTAILS!!!

Aya: -_-…

Omi: So Ayapunzel dropped his eartails down to Schuldich and leaned out the window.

Schu: Ok! This shouldn't be so hard...*grabs eartails*

Aya: OW!

Schu: *climbs* ow…

Aya: @___@!!! You think YOU'RE in pain?!!

Schu: Kind of, yes.

Omi: So! Prince Schu climbed up the tower and finally climbed in!

Schu: Haha! I am here to rescue you!

Aya: Yeah right. I know exactly what you WANT to do.

Omi: But to stick to the storyline, Prince Schu…

Farfie: PULLED OUT A PAIR OF SCISSORS AND CUT OFF AYAPUNZEL'S EARTAILS AND THE MARSHMELLOW ARTIFICIAL FOOD COLORING DANCED AROUND BECAUSE THEY WERE SOOOOOO HAPPY AND GOD WAS BADLY HURT BY THE DANCING BECAUSE THEY WERE BURNING A BRITNEY SPEARS EFFIGY IN THE LAKE OF FIREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aya: O.O

Schu: o.O

Crawford: *WHACK*

Farfie: x_x

Aya: *sob* My eartails...*wobbles around*

Schu: ^_^ Haha! *catches Aya* Now I will get you out of this tower!….somehow…

Aya: Don't you have rope?

Schu: …not really. I have some of Yohji's razor wire…

Yohji: so THAT'S where it went!!!!!!

Schu: ^^;;; Relax! It's only a little bit!

Yohji: Eighteen feet is more than a little bit.

Schu: But for now, we'll have to stick with what we have.

Aya: What's that supposed to mean?

Schu: *evil smirk* You're missing your eartails, which puts you off balance. BADLY off balance. Which renders you helpless.

Aya: …

Schu: *pulls down window curtain*
Aya: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Omi: …o_o…;;;;;;;;;;;;;….

Ken: ….cheese?

Crawford: *lifts 2 by 4*

Ken: AAAAH I'LL STOP!!!

Crawford: Good.

Omi: I don't even want to know what they're doing in that tower…

Nagi: But those of you reading probably know.

Omi: And…hey, isn't it Min's birthday?

Yohji: Actually, that's Saturday (May 25). But we need to finish the story for the sake of the readers.

Omi: Ok. Crawford?

Crawford: Nani?

Omi: Go make Schu finish the story CORRECTLY.

Crawford: Why me?!

Ken: Because Yohji managed to hurt himself in the last four or five lines by playing with his razor wire and you're really the only other person around that he'll sleep with that's stronger than him.

Crawford: Oh. I forgot. -_- SCHULDICH!!!

Schu: *peeps head out window* What?

Crawford: Finish the story appropriately.

Schu: ! Fine. *goes back in*

Omi: o_o;;; So Prince Schuldich carried Ayapunzel out of the tower by going down razor wire.

Schu: OW! This is PAINFUL!

Aya: *clinging to Schu's neck* It'll be even MORE painful when I get my katana back.

Schu: IF you can get it back.

Aya: …

Schu: *snickers*

Omi: And they rode off…

Farfie: INTO THE SUNSET UPON WHICH THEY STUMBLED IN A LAKE OF FIRE AND BURNED TO DEATH, BUT THEY WOULD HAVE DONE THAT ANYWAY IF THEY HAD MANGED TO HIT THE SUNSET AND SHEEP ROCK REALLY DOES LOOK LIKE SHEEP!!!!!!! WONDER OF ALL WONDERS!!!!! AND I BAKED THE BREAD AND CHIHUAHUAED THE BREAD AND SO ON AND SO ON UNTIL YOU ALL GET SO SICK OF WHAT I'M SAYING THAT CRAWFORD TAKES HIS WONDERFUL STEEL TWO BY FOUR AND WHACKS ME ACROSS THE HEAD WITH IT!!!!!!!

Crawford: *SHRAM*

Farfie: HAHA, YOU MISSED!!!

Crawford: *whunk*

Farfie: x_x

Nagi: …into the sunset.

Schu: And I –

Omi: Did not get to do anything with Aya.

Schu: WHY NOT?!!

Omi: Because Sakki-san sold his human rights to min as a birthday present.

Aya: WHAT THE – SHI-NE SAKKI SAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Schu: Can I buy them from Min?

Crawford: If she lets you.

Ken: You may want to ask her before you give her the money…

Farfie: AND WE ALL GET TO IRISH STEP DANCE!!!

Aya: *pulls out katana* SHI-NE!!!!

Sakki: (o.0) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~FIN~

~HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINERVA!!!~