^o^ Brad's gonna kill meeeee….
Weiß Kreuz Fairy Tales
Written by Sakki-san
NYOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!!! I live!!!
….for those of you who were wondering where I was for the past month and a half, I was in England. -_- Send me e-mails.
How to make your own Weiss parody of Weiss:
1. Find a handy sheet of paper. (Any siblings' homework, important bills, or family Christmas letters will do just fine.)
2. Tear off eight small pieces. (About the size of half a pen is good.)
3. Write the names of Weiss and Schwarz on the slips and then again on the remaining paper. (One name per paper.)
4. Find a hat. (Baseball hat, mother's best Sunday hat, chareteuse wombat…)
5. Put the eight pieces of paper in the hat and mix them up. (With your hand. Using a spoon or two does not work well.)
6. Pull out one slip of paper. Write whatever name is on that slip next to the name Aya on the large remaining piece of paper. (If you draw Aya for Aya, put the paper back and draw another.)
7. Do this for all eight boys. (Boys? Men? Fools?)
8. Put the hat back where you found it. (That or the cat's litterbox, depending on who it belongs to.)
9. Throw away the slips with the names on them. (Or use them to light a fire somewhere.)
10. Eat the remaining paper. (This way it doesn't go to waste.)
Aya:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Omi: O_O What's wrong, Aya?!
Aya: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Omi: O_O...
Aya: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brad: Aya, if you don't shut up and tell us what the problem is, I'm going to hurt you.
Aya: Do you think I care?! I learned what today's parody is!!!
Yohji: What is it?
Aya: US!
All: …
Schu: ….what?
Aya: WE HAVE TO SWITCH ROLES AND PLAY EACH OTHER!!!!!!!
Schu: …..*laughs maniacally* This will be fun!
Aya: But we don't get to pick who we play.
Schu: O_O *stops laughing* Oh, shit.
Sakki-san: *holding her Spanish camp hat* MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!
Brad: DEAR GOD!!!
Farf: Parodies of Weiss hurt God…
Sakki-san: ^_^ Ok! Now remember that I drew these totally at random and therefore you can't blame me for anything.
Nagi: We can blame you for coming up with this stupid idea…
Sakki-san: Yes, but you can't blame me for drawing the names as such because it wasn't purposeful. *hands Omi a list and runs off, cackling maniacally*
Omi: …*SOB*
Ken: What? What's wrong? *sees list* O.O oh….
Brad: List the parts. Maybe it'll be easier this way.
Omi: ;-; Aya, you play Farf.
Aya: o.O WHAT?!?!?!!!
Farf: NYOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!!!!
Aya: DEAR GOD NO!!!
Farf: GOD IS NOT DEAR!!! LEARN YOUR PART!
Omi: Stop bickering, you two. ;-; I…I have to…I have to play YOHJI!
Yohji: *sputter* WHAT?! But…but…but…you lack all sex appeal! The girls won't flock to you like they do to me!! You don't smoke!!! You don't drink!!!! My god, man, I'll have to teach you all of this!!!
Omi: O_O Don't you dare. You have to play Brad.
All: .................................................................................................
Brad: .....................................................WHAT?
Yohji: *stares, cigarette falling from his mouth*
Omi: ^^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;…………………………..
Yohji: …..NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T PLAY SOME TOTALLY UN-SEXY AMERICAN SQUARE!!! *breaks down crying*
Schu: Hey, he's not un-sexy!....usually…
Brad: =________________=
Omi: Well….Ken, you play me.
Ken: Not bad. *plays around with making his hair like Omi's*
Omi: Brad…
Brad: =_=
Omi: …you play Ken.
Brad: …great, I get to be some ex-J-league hyperactive jock…
Ken: Hey!
Omi: Schu?
Schu: O_O!
Omi: …you play Nagi.
Schu: ……..AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Nagi: Oh, DAMN.
Schu: I don't wanna play Nagi.
Omi: Too bad. Farf, you play Aya.
Farf: ^_^ hee hee hee…I play him…he plays me…what a coincidence…God will be bleeding…
Aya: -__________________________________________________-
Omi: o.o Aya, your face will be stuck like that. And Nagi pla – O_O
Nagi: I play Schu, don't I? He's the only one left. *whines* This is so HORRIBLE.
Schu: You play me and I play you, calm down, I'll teach you how to flirt with Brad…
Brad: *sigh*
Omi: Well, let's get going…what episode are we parody-ing?
Sakki-san: No episode…YOUR LIVES!!! NYOHOHOHOHO!!!!!!
All: *groan*
*'Weiss' is at the flower shop, dressed in their t-shirts, jeans, and aprons. The usual pack of squealing girls are there.*
Farf: *watering blood on the roses* …
Girls: EEEEE!!!!
Omi: *looks….flirtatious* =)
Girls: EEEEE!!!!
Brad: *carries a huge pot from one side of the room to another* …
Girls :EEEEE!!!!
Ken: *arranges flowers* =^_^=
Girls: EEEEE!!!!
All four: *thinking* This is the stupidest thing I have ever done.
Brad: I don't get it! How can you stand this flock of evil creatures every day?!
Ken: Badly.
Omi: -_- Stay in character, guys…please… *attempts to flirt with a flock of screaming girls*
Brad: *sigh…* ……
Girls: *gather around Farf, screaming*
Farf: ………..this……makes……..God……l –
Omi: *glare!*
Farf: ………BUY SOMETHING OR LEEEEEAVE
Girls: OOOO, AYA SO SCARYYYYY!!!!!!!
Farf: ….*cringes away*
Brad: *being glomped by girls* g-g-g-go awaaaayyy….
*at the Schwarz apartment. Two of 'Schwarz' are sitting around, while the other two are missing. Screaming is coming from down a hall.*
Yohji: -_-…
Nagi: …
Yohji: …aren't you supposed to be throwing yourself at me?
Nagi: Dear God, I hope not.
Aya: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Schu: JUST PUT IT ON!!!!
Nagi: Why is he being so obstinate?
Yohji: Hey, I'M not enjoying this suit. You might be enjoying the nice jacket and stuff, but do you have any idea where they might have been?
Nagi: …..oh……….my…….*squirms*
Schu: *comes out of another room, wearing a gray outfit like Nagi's* ^_^ I did it!
Nagi: What? Got him to wear the vest?
Schu: ^_^ Mhm. Complete with the bandages n' stuff.
Aya: *staggers out in Farf's clothes* God help me.
Schu: Ah-ah-ahhh! You need to be in CHARACTER.
Aya: ……….-_- wearing Farf's clothes hurts God.
Schu: ^_^ Much better!
Nagi: Stop smiling. I don't smile so much.
Schu: ….awww…I just remembered that…But I smile a LOT! So SMILE, Nagi!
Nagi: ….*attempts to smile*
Yohji: *watches* …keep trying…
Schu: *sits, and tries to look Nagi-ish* …-_-……XD!!! I can't do this!! *laughs*
Aya: -________- *plays with that strap tied to both legs*
Schu: XD XD XD!!! ^_^;;; Aya, c'mon, lick a knife!
Aya: ……………*pulls one out* ……………o_o………
Yohji: Go on, do it.
Nagi: Hey, I'M supposed to be saying that. YOU'RE supposed to be a stiff American business-person.
Yohji: …
Schu: That's the spirit. Brad's always constipated.
Aya: ….. *licks knife* …._@....
Nagi: Oh, c'mon. It wasn't that bad.
Aya: No…I liked it…
All: ….o.o….
~~~
*back at the flower shop. It's after-hours.*
Farf: *twitch*
Omi: …ug….I can't *do* this…
Brad: You think you've got it bad?! I have to play a jock!
Omi: And I'm sure you were a nerd in high school.
Brad: …
Ken: …HAH, YOU WERE!! XD!!!!!
Brad: It's not nice to make fun of people!
Farf: But it hurts God…
Omi: Stay in character, Farf.
Ken: XD
Brad: -_- They always make fun of the smart kids…*suddenly stands up* But I got my revenge!!
Ken: *snort snort* By doing what?! SMARTING them to death?! *cracks up again*
Brad: No…I sabotaged their homes with stink bombs and –
Ken: *falls off his chair*
Omi: …^^;;;;;…. Calm down, Ken – Omi…
Brad: ….and I destroyed their lives through the computer. *breaks into maniacal laughter* ((The authoress freaks out and runs away screaming at this thought because she often thinks Brad is scarier than Farf.))
Omi: That wasn't very nice…
Brad: *sits down again* Hah! They were all jocks and preps and the kind I eat for breakfast!
Farf: Mmm….you should have let ME kill them. First I'd –
Omi: *glare*
Farf: …I mean…shi-ne.
Ken: *passes out*
Omi: …Aya, put Omi in his room, would you?
Farf: Why me? Why not YOU, you flirt?!
Omi: …uh...it would…not be…good…for…popularity…
Brad: *groan*
Omi: Well, now you're a jock…you're built like one, you know?
Brad: O_O What?!
Omi: Uh, I-I mean, you're really strong! A-and muscley?
Brad: …you really think so? *looks in the mirror* …by George, you're right!
Farf: *drags Ken-Omi upstairs and answers the phone halfway down* ((…my cat has taken my hand hostage…ow…he's heavy and he's LYING on the fonging thing…)) Hello, kitties in the house, how can I help you? *listens* Mhm….yes….ya…who am I? I'm Aya. ….yup. bye bye.
Omi: o-O F – Aya, wh ((OWWWW, DON'T BITE ME YOU FONGING CAT!)) at's the matter?
Farf: o_o We have a…mission. But so does…Schwarz.
Brad: Don't waste any time, then! Get Omi and let's go!
Omi: *hands out weapons*
Brad: …..*whimper*
~THE END…FOR NOW~
Of course I'll write a second part, I'd never be so evil as to leave you
hanging.
…wait. Yes I would.
