Disclaimer: X-men not mine
Akai Kah'ghe: Hmmmm…..I'm going to have to teach Doggy on good review catchink etiquette.
Laureate: Yeah, but doesn't bad luck always make for the most amusing situations? As for school, I am turning the tide…sort of.
Kar-chan: Hmm.. Off the top of my head I would say two times visiting the slammer. However, I'm guessing they've broken over thirty laws, many of them felonies.
Chrissy: I thought that would be fun….just because.
Rogue77: Hmmm….I might be able to arrange that. If not in this story than in another one I'm thinking up.
Flamingo1: I was wondering where you were. I was writing my shout-outs and you almost didn't make it. First day of high school, hunh? Good job. As for the pairing, I was entertaining the thought. It may still happen.
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"WOOOHOOOO!"
"Can somebody please shut her up?!" Arcane hissed. We were almost out of the courthouse, all charges having thus far been dropped. Unless you count the impending charge of disrupting the peace, as Tabby was demonstrating.
"Tabby!" Ray tried to shush her.
"Ray, why didn't you ever ask me out? I mean, you are a cutie, so obviously you're attracted to me."
"Dream o—did you just say I was cute?"
"Nope! OOO! They have snack machines!"
"I cannot believe you invited her!" Arcane hit his forehead with his palm. By some miracle of chance (I'm not going to point the finger at any one mutant) the police didn't find any illegally altered firearms or anything else like that on the rest of us. Just a miracle of chance.
"Uh…would you believe I fell for her puppy dog eyes?"
"MY GOSH! THAT WOMAN IS BUTT-UGLY!"
"No."
"I didn't think so…."
Police officers swiftly escorted us outside. I think they were afraid of losing their jobs.
We got run out onto the steps outside the courthouse. Viva la Cleveland, baby.
"AWW! LOOK AT THE CUTE PUPPIES!"
"What?" I turned around to look at where Tabby was running off too. "YIKES! NO TABBY! DON'T TOUCH THEM!"
"What?" Tabby turned around suddenly from going off to pet two incredibly volatile canines. "Why?"
"Because that is a full-grown hyena and her wolfhound boyfriend you're gonna try to get friendly with," Lance supplied. Soon after he was whacked in the head by Wanda, because there was a security guard not ten feet away.
But fortunately, he was deaf. Or close enough.
"What are you two doing here?!" I snarled as I ran...well limped…down as fast as I could to my two canine cohorts.
We followed your scent. Hezibah thought it would be prudent to wait for you.
"Prudent? PRUDENT?! Do you realize where you are?! People will not take kindly to a hyena and her mute sidekick running around!"
Doggy is mute? Hezibah did not realize.
"Well he's, I mean—Alright, I don't know if he's mute, but if he isn't he's probably pretty close. Wait…THAT ISN'T THE POINT!"
"Dan, Keep your voice dowhn." Sam cautioned me. Herman and Kally stuck their heads out of my collar.
Sam is right. Right.
Can I go sit with Ray now?
I reached up and pulled Kally out of my shirt and pushed her unceremoniously to Ray.
"We would have come to get you! What if somebody recognized you, hunh? Do you realize what kind of trouble you two could have been in? They could have put you both down!"
Someone put you down. Your face is very purple.I gave her my glare of death only reserved for people who point out the obvious. She just let the silence speak for both of us.
"Hey, you guys gonna come or what?"
I broke my glaring contest with Hezibah to see Tabby driving our bus. The side doors were open and waiting for us. For some reason, she managed to wander off and grab our van. And for another reason, nobody wanted to make the first step into the bus.
It only took a couple miles to figure out why.
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"KILLITKILLITKILLIT!"
"Will you stop freaking? You're going to wake up the rest of the mansion! Those kids need their rest!"
Ororo jumped onto a chair, trying to escape the evil spider that just does not want to die.
"KIIILLLLLLIIIITTTTTTT!"
Logan tried to catch the spider as it scurried up the chair. Ororo screamed and flew up into the air, only to forget that the ceiling was low in that particular room.
WHACK!
Ororo dropped like a stone into Logan's arms. The spider, managing to escape death yet again, scurried off into the hall, ducking into some other room.
Evan chose to walk into the room that held the two adults at the most inopportune time.
"WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!"
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"Sounds like it struck again," Bobby commented from his bed. Roberto snickered.
"Vhy does zat thing not die, mein freunds? Perhaps it is mutant, yah?" Kurt put his head to the floor, hearing the screams come up through the floor.
"If it is, maybe we can send it after Apocalypse. Not even he could kill that thing." Roberto sniggered from his cot. Kurt grinned and teleported up to the light fixture, hanging by his tail.
"Think we can catch it again for a prank?" Bobby made a little spider out of ice.
"Mein freund, if I remember correctly, it was not I nor Sunspot vhom vaz pulling zhose pranks."
"So I was being general. So sue me."
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"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!"
"You're just a spoilsport!" Tabby laughed as she kicked the bus into a higher gear. Ray had gotten the unlucky and totally unenviable task of sitting shotgun.
Doggy and Hezibah became swiftly attached to me. We took the very back seat again. Lance had been sitting next to me, and Doggy had been sitting between Rogue and Arcane one seat up, but when Tabby started racing a guy in a dueley, he took a leap into the back seat and cowered next to me, half sitting on Lance.
"TABBBBBBBBYYYYYYYYY! THE CAR!!!!"
"Stop screaming like a little girl, RAY!"
I heard several other screams from the others as a little sports car whistled past us, almost clipping the side of the van. And this a four lane highway. Tabby was engaging in another race, this time with a gray sedan.
Well, actually it turned out to be an unmarked cop car. A portable light showed up on his dash and began flashing.
"MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
"NOOO! TABBY! PULL OVER!"
"I NEVER SURRENDER! NO ONE CAN CATCH BOOM-BOOM!"
"YOU FLAMING LUNATIC!"
According to my watch, it has been eight hours since my birthday began. And seven of those were in jail. Now I was stuck in a bus, holding a whimpering bat, hyena, and wolfhound, with a driver who was psychotic to the point that made a loony bin look like the sanest place on earth.
"AIIEEEEEEEE!"
Several of us screamed, not all of them girls. Rogue was grimly clinging to the seat and Arcane, who was yelling something in Greek. And judging by the way he was going on, I assume it was not polite. Sam, John, and Ray were all screaming.
Lance and I had assumed the position of Oh-I-really-hope-we-don't-die. It involved us ducking down into the seat and covering our eyes. And holding onto whatever animal happened to be close by. They couldn't protect their heads.
The bus's tires screamed as it left the sedan in the dust. It's a good thing Spike had the foresight to put on different plates on our bus. I'd really hate to have to explain to Uncle Robbie why he got a subpoena for resisting arrest.
Not that it probably hasn't happened before.
Wanda started waving her hands around above her head. I know, because I heard Rogue and Arcane yelling at her to stop. Then there was an explosion and loads of cuss words.
"LOOK WHAT YOU DID YOU INSANE LITTLE KLEPTO!"
"ME?! YOU TRIED HEXING ME! Not a very smart thing to do for the person that's driving the bus!"
"AN APE COULD DRIVE BETTER THAN YOU! MY BROTHER COULD DRIVE BETTER THAN YOU! YOU JUST BLEW UP THE SEAT YOU LITTLE TWIT!"
"THE NEXT ONE'S GOING UP YOUR NOSE!"
The bus began to swerve all over the road. And I just could not stand it anymore.
"PULL THIS BUS OVER NOW!!!!!!"
My fingers were digging holes into the back of the seat in front of me. Everybody was silent and cowering, even Tabby and Wanda. I believe it was more from the harrowing ride than from myself. But it got the job done. Tabby pulled over. I got out of the van and walked to the driver's side.
"Out. NOW."
She meekly got out and there was a swift musical chair shuffle of seats. Ray relocated to the very back, taking Herman, my poor traumatized bat, with him and sat between Hezibah and Doggy. Kally curled up next to Herman inside his shirt pocket. Lance, Tabby, and Rogue got the back middle, While Wanda, Sam, and Arcane sat in the front middle. Johnny sat shotgun.
Which left me with the driver's seat. Nobody thought to look at the 'forbidden activities for Danny' I guess.
Then again, considering everybody's mental state, they might not care.
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Alright, on the road again!
Reviews shall be taken by Hezibah, who is being supervised by Dexroth. Remember, don't stick your fingers in the mouth, in the ears, or in the nose of the review taker. Chances are the results are not pretty.
