~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rand's Room ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rand sat on his bed, trying to look hard and buff and important. He could never get it just right. Lan could do it so well! Maybe if he practiced the sword a bit more... suddenly the door burst open and Elayne and Min ran inside.
"Rand!" The chorused.
"...Elayne! Min! Weasels!" He said.
"Hi!" Min said excitedly.
"What's with the weasels?"
"They are my brothers and sisters. I was raised by weasels in the wild. Do you have a problem with that??" Min glared at him. He shook his head.
"Of course not. I just wasn't... aware."
"So, Rand, what's new?"
"Well, I'm being stalked by Lanfear."
"That dirty..." Min went off on a rant about how Forsaken should not be able to wear anything besides a turtle neck and stretch pants, certainly not the things Lanfear wore. Sulk.
"Oh Wandy-poo! I am so sorry!" Elayne cooed, and Min rolled her eyes.
"Sheepherder, just balefire her. Not that hard!" They both closed in for what would be some intense comforting when suddenly a woman in a tight pink leather cat suit jumped through the window.
"Ahhhhhhhh! I must be the ruler of Candy Land! Where is King Kandy? He must be impeached! Aaaaargggggggh!" With that she raced out the door and slammed it behind her. All three exchanged odd looks.
"Well then," Rand began uncertainly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nynaeve's Room ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lan carried Nynaeve into her room and lay her down on the bed. Her ankle really did hurt, actually, but she thought she might be able to walk by herself... but being carried was fun. When she was settled on the bed, which was actually quite comfortable for a lower-class inn, Lan noticed the scratches on her leg which Minstrel Martin had made.
"They must be cleaned right away, Nynaeve. I will call for some water and bandages." Lan plucked a servant out of the hallway and bade her go fetch some medical tools. As she scurried away, he came back inside and knelt beside Nynaeve's bed... if he sat in the chair, he was too tall. Nynaeve shifted, and winced at the pain in her leg. That was a sharp butter knife! Lan, noticing her pain, bent down and kissed all her scratches. Nynaeve smiled; she had waited soooooooo long for him to kiss her again. Maybe she had not fantasized about on the leg, but it was better than nothing.
"Better, my love?" he asked.
"Much." At that moment the servant came in, carrying a bowl of water and some cloth to serve as a bandage. When she scurried away again, Lan washed off the scratches and pressed pieces of cloth onto them... but they would not stay on, so finally he gave up and tied the cloth around her ankle, since it *apparently* was hurt.
"Thank you, Lan."
"Of course."
"Lan? Do you still love me, or has time changed your mind?" Nynaeve was not sure if she wanted to know the answer.
"Of course I still love you. Forever." Yay! Nynaeve could never have been happier.
"What about you?" Nynaeve considered this, but soon she could take it no longer and she grabbed his face and pulled him down to her. They kissed for a while, and then Lan retracted back to his kneeling position.
"Does that answer your question?" she asked. Before he had a chance to answer, though he obviously would say yes, the door burst open and a strange looking woman in a pink cat suit ran in.
"Are you King Kandy? I must find him! He must be impeached! Candy Land will be mine, forever!!! Bwa ha ha ha ha!"
"No, actually, no I'm not King Kandy..." Lan said.
"Darn. I must find him!! I....must.....rule....CANDY....LAND!!!!!"
"What are you doing in my room?" Nynaeve demanded. "Get out! Now!" With that the strange woman darted out and slammed the door loudly.
"Okay..." Nynaeve was fairly stunned by all of it. She patted the blanket next to her and he sat down and put his arm around her shoulders.
"Good... I'm tired, I need to lean on something besides this stiff headboard," Nynaeve decided. She leaned into him and fell almost instantly asleep. It was very tiring, being attacked by a Minstrel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Egwene's Room ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Egwene was lounging in a couch, watching Lakers vs Nicks on cable, drinking a Bud Lite and eating dozens of Cheetos. Suddenly there was a frantic knock at the door. Egwene quickly pushed a button in the wall and the couch and tv went away, and she stuffed the beer and cheese ouffs under her bed. After all, she was supposed to be up to important Amyrlin stuff. She had only just gotten everything away when the door opened and a woman in a pink, leather catsuit charged in.
"King Kandy! I must find him! Have you seen King Kandy? Candy Land will be mine! The Teletubbies will be my slaves, forever! Mua ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" Egwene was shocked for a moment. Those eyes looked familiar...
"Moiraine?" she asked dubiously.
"How DARE you think I would parade around in an outfit like that, Egwene al'Vere!" a shrill voice shrieked. Egwene whipped around and saw Moiraine climbing through her window, still in her engineers hat, and a simple blue dress.
"Well who is this?" Egwene asked, pointing at the lady in pink.
"This is Elaida. I tortured her until she went mad." Moiraine looked quite pleased with herself. Egwene turned back to the woman.
"Hahhahahahahahahahahahaha! SUCKER!!!"
"King Kandy! Is that you?" the woman asked admiringly.
"No, you doof! I am the Amyrlin Seat!" Moiraine did a double-take.
"Say again?"
"No, you doof! I am the Amyrlin Seat!"
"Siuan Sanche is the Amyrlin!"
"HA! Thing have changed bigtime since you died, baby." Moiraine looked miffed.
"Damn. This means I will have to start manipulating even more people to somehow get you kicked out and me elected... this will be so hard..." she began muttering to herself, and Elaida looked at her strangely.
"I'm off to rule Candy Land!" Suddenly Elaida ran out the door again. And slammed it. Egwene sniffed.
"Moiraine, why did you break into my room?"
"I thought this was Nynaeve's room. I need to have a chat with her about Lan. He is mine. All mine! She can't have him! My, preciousssssssssssssssss." Moiraine's voice turned into a hiss. Egwene was scared. And scarred.
"Well, her room is room 82. So you go do that." Moiraine wandered out, muttering about "We founds it, it is ours! Tricksey little wilder stoles it from us... Precious, we will gets it back..." Egwene gave her an odd look and then decided to go warn Nynaeve about it. She sneaked out and started up the hall to Nynaeve's room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Room 82 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Moiraine burst in on a random people sitting around and talking.
"Nynaeve! He is mine! BACK OFF! Oh by the way have you seen Elaida around?" The people stared at her. Except, they weren't people. And, they weren't talking. They were gurgling. They were... TELETUBBIES!
"AHHHHHHHHHH! RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!" Moiraine bolted out into the hall and closed the door, panting with fear.
"That was a close one. Oh no , Elaida is right... she is building an army of mindless teletubbies! Run away!!!!!!!!! But first; I must find Nynaeve." With that she set out to try and find Nynaeve's room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nynaeve's Room ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nynaeve suddenly woke up, and remembered where she was. She looked up at Lan and smiled. He was still awake, of course, holding her. She was quite warm. How cool is this, she thought. He bent his head down and they kissed, and Nynaeve thought it would last forever. But forever would not be long enough. Suddenly the door burst open again, and Egwene panted in.
"Nynaeve, you'll never guess, Elaida and Moiraine and- oh." Egwene dropped her eyes in embarrassement. Nynaeve processed that there was someone else in the room, and slowly untangled herself from Lan. It was hard to do. When they were finally only sitting next to each other, with his arm around her shoulder, Egwene continued. Nynaeve could not help blushing.
"Okay, Moiraine is here and she is looking for you, Nynaeve. She says Lan is her.. her preciousssssssssssssssssssssss." Lan shook his head.
"She has been reading to much Lord of the Rings."
"...Right. But anyway did you see a woman in a pink leather suit?"
"Yes!" Nynaeve said. "She barged right in on... us." She blushed again.
"Okay, well that is Elaida. Moiraine tortured her until she went mad. She says she is going to own teletubbies and rule Candy Land." Suddenly Moiraine came in, too.
"No! It's true! The teletubbies are here! They will rule all!"
"Oh, look," Egwene said sadly, "Moiraine has gone mad too. What a shame."
"No really! I saw them! And Egwene, you lied. You said Nynaeve was in room 82. Aes Sedai will not be pleased."
"Oh, I haven't sworn on the Oath Rod, so ha." Suddenly Moiraine noticed Nynaeve and Lan in bed, though that's not really what it was. They were just sitting on it. It just sounds like something else. Anyway.
"Nynaeve!" she shrieked. At this Nynaeve put her arms around Lan defiantly.
"Moiraine!" Nynaeve mimicked in a shrill voice.
"Don't you take that tone with me, young lady!" Moiraine said angrily.
"Don't you take that tone with me, young lady!'
"Stoppit! I'm older than you, Nynaeve!"
"Stoppit! I'm older than you, Nynaeve!"
"STOPPIT! Lan, make her stop."
"STOPPIT! Lan, make her stop." Nynaeve was having fun with this.
"You can't call me young lady!"
"Oh, right, I'm sorry.. You're old."
"ANYWAY," Egwene interupted, "Are you DONE? You two are so immature. Light. Moiraine, why are you here?"
"To chat with Nynaeve about Lan." Nynaeve tightened her grip around Lan's waist.
"What is there to chat about?!?!" Nynaeve demanded.
"Light, Nynaeve! Just shut up for a second!" Egwene cried, thoroughly frustrated at the pair of Aes Sedai.
"Well anyway, he is so my Warder, and Nynaeve just can't have him. She just... can't."
"Wow, that makes a lot of sense," Nynaeve said sarcastically, and Egwene shot her a look.
"It's just not right for her 2 be, like, you know, kissing him."
"Oh, it so is," Nynaeve broke in. With that, just to spite Moiraine, she began kissing all over Lan's face and neck. Lan just sat there, feeling used and not knowing what to do.
"Blood and ashes, Nynaeve! Calm down!" Egwene grumbled, rolling her eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rand's Room ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The three of them had honestly just sat and talked for all the time after (apparently) Elaida had come by.. They did not want anymore unexpected visits. It turned out, they did not have much to say. Now they were playing I-Spy.
"I spy, with my little eye, something... empty," Min said.
"Empty?"
"Yeah, empty, sheepherder. You got a problem with that?"
"No, no. Hmmmm." They looked around for something, and finally were stumped.
"Okay, okay. Are you ready? It's.... Elayne's head! Hahahahahahahahaha." Elayne didn't get it, but she ws happy at being included in the joke she so laughed too. Rand wasn't sure of he should laugh or deny it.
"My turn!" Elayne said.
"Why?"
"Because I was part of Min's joke!"
"So? No one guessed it! It's my turn again," Min demanded.
"Fine, Min. Once more." Min had done it the last 7 times.
"Okay. I spy, with my little eye, something shiny." Elayne's eyes lit up.
"I love shiny things!"
"I dunno, Min, what?" Rand asked.
"My shiny new silver coins that I won! Hahahahaha, I'm rich!"

About ten minutes later

"No, no, no, you do it all wrong, sheepherder. It's like this. *cackle*."
"I can't do it, Min. I will never know how to cackle." Rand wiped a tear from his eye.
"I can! I can!" Elayne said, and went on in a fit of evil-sounding giggles.
"No, Elayne, you're wrong. Give it up." Min rolled her eyes.

Ten more minutes later

"B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O and Bingo was him name-o!" Thy all sang.
"And on that farm he had a... I think we've done every animal on earth, guys," Rand said.
"And on that farm he had a WEASEL!" Min cried.
"E-I-E-I-O!"
"With a *weasel noise* here, and a *wesel noise* there, here a weasel there a weasel everywhere a weasel weasel old McDonald had a farm.."
"Hey, wait," Rand said. "I think we got the songs messed up."
"Wow, we should do something else now. I'm going mad," Min said.
"Me too," Rand said. Me too, Lews Therin muttered.
"Let's go find Egwene and Nynaeve and Lan!" Elayne said.
"Lan?? Finally! Another GUY! I can practice the sword forms!" Rand cried delightedly. They al ran out to find the three other people.
They came to rom 90 and didn't bother to knock. As they walked in, they found Egwene rolling her eyes, Nynaeve and Lan sitting on the bed.. Nynaeve was kissing Lan within an inch of his life (she had switched to his lips now). As she kissed him she glared at another woman. The woman was...
"Moiraine?" Rand said dubiously.
"Rand al'Thor!" Moiraine screeched at him. She was in a foul mood because of Nynaeve.
"Nynaeve!" Rand said, even more dubiously. "What are you doing?" Nynaeve just noticed the three visitors, and she pulled herself off of Lan.
"It's not what it seems!" she cried desperately. "I'm just trying to make Moiraine mad."
"Light, Nynaeve, have you no self control?" Elayne asked. Nynaeve shot her a look and leaned against Lan, glowering.
"Moiraine! Get out! You can't have Lan!" Egwene said.
"Rand al'Thor! You pathetic excuse for a Dragon bloody Reborn! You are such a flaming woolheaded sheepherder that-"
"Watch your language," Nynaeve muttered.
"Hey hey! Watch it, Moiraine! Only I can call him sheepherder!" Min said.
"I'd like to see you try and stop me." With that Min flung herself on Moiraine. They had a major catfight, complete with scratching kicking biting and hair pulling.
"Get her, Min!" Nynaeve shouted. Egwene only rolled her eyes again.
"Light! Get a grip! Nynaeve, stop sulking. Moiraine and Min, stop fighting. Elayne and Rand, stop kissing." Elayne blushed. "Lan, just...well actually you're not doing anything." Lan looked pleased with himself. Finally it pays off, he thought.
"Okay. Now, we are all going down to dinner. ALL of us. Got it?" Egwene ordered.
"I don't want to," Moiraine whined.
"TOUGH." Egwene marched them all downstairs. Besides Elayne and Lan, every last one was sulking.
"Egwene, why do you have to be so bossy?" Rand asked childishly, sounding like a boy talking to his older sister.
"Shut up Rand."
Egwene booked a table for 8. As they arrived at the table, there was a big fancy seat at one end and a not-so-fancy one on the other end. On the sides were benches.
"Sit where you like, children," Egwene said, kiddingly. Rand went for the big seat.
"Rand! Get out!"
"But you said-"
"I lied! That is my seat! OUT!" Rand got out reluctantly.
"Sit at the other end, if you must. That is the Dragon Reborn seat. This is the Amyrlin Seat." Rand laughed at the joke.
"No really. I brought it with me." She looked serious, so Rand wisely stopped laughing and trotted off to the other end.
"Haha! Not if I get there first! Now it's the Moiraine Seat." Rand sat down, on the verge of tears, on a bench, muttering about "foul, mean old Aes Sedai taking his seat." Egwene heard him.
"Are you calling me old, Rand al'Thor?"
"Maybe I am."
"Should everybody know all the nick names your father used to call you when you were a little boy? Believe me, I know," Egwene threatened.
"Haha! I know them too!" Nynaeve said. She grinned at Egwene, who grinned back. This was fun. Rand did not grin..this was just like old times, Nynaeve and Egwene ganging up on him. Min looked at Nynaeve, and Elayne looked at Egwene. At the same time they both said,
"Oooh, tell us! We should know." Rand buried his face in his hands, and Nynaeve and Egwene went off on all the embarrassing names his father used to call him like "rand the man" and "randy-bumpkins" and many others. Moiraine howled with laughter and made a mental note to call him all these names when he miffed her. Lan actually laughed at a lot of them, and Rand felt betrayed.
"It's not my fault! I was a mindless country bumpkin back then, okay! Now I am almighty and powerful!" At this Moiraine laughed even louder.
"Ha, that's what you think. I am almighty and powerful!"
"No, I am! I rule Candy Land! Ha ha ha!" Elaida suddenly appeared. Four teletubbies were stationed behind her.
"Tinkey-winkey!" the purple one said.
"Blahlbahlabh" said the green one (i don't remember its name).
"La-la," the yellow one chorused.
"Po," finished the red one.
"Oh, have you killed King Kandy yet?" Nynaeve asked sarcastically.
"No, not yet. But this is what these teletubbies are for!" Elaida cried. Min, curious about the things, bopped on one the head.
"Uh-ohhhhh!" It said in the trademark voice. Min's hand leapt back.
"Strange. Oh, wait! I see your aura!" Min lied.
"Really? What does it say?"
"It says... it says King Kandy is that way!" She pointed to the door. "He is in...Falme. Yes, and you are destined to kill him and... and take over Candy Land! Hurray!" Elaida screamed in joy.
"I knew it! Yes! Let's go, tubbies!" and she raced out the door. The teletubbies followed her.
"Well, that got rid of her easily," Min said.

They all ate dinner, and retired to their rooms. They called up a cot for Elayne, and she Min and Rand slept in Rand's room, which now had three beds. Moiraine offered to stay in Nynaeve and Elayne's room, which was now Nynaeve and Lan's room, but Nynaeve refused. It worked out though, because Nynaeve's room had one bed instead of two, like Rand's had originally, so it was perfect. Nynaeve booted Moiraine out into Egwene's room.