PotC: The Curse of the MARY SUES!!!
*Disclaimer: I still do not own PotC, Will, or Jack. Dammit.
*Note: A BIG thank you to Artemis15, Onyx and S, Stefynae, Yao Kafei, Dre Ship-Ship, and Daroga's Rainy Daae. Your wonderful reviews are what keep me going. And thank you to Daroga's Rainy Daae for the many fabulous Mary Sue clichés that you have suggested; a few have made their way into mah story. Please continue to review, flame, criticize, anything you'd like. On to Chapter 2!!
**Another Note: I lied. Helpless-Maiden Mary Sue will not make her fabulous debut until next chapter. I know that you are all so very disappointed.
Chapter 2: She-Pirate Mary Sue: Part II
She-Pirate Mary Sue placed her smoking pistol back into its holster and helped the two astonished men to their feet. Perhaps they were staring at her beauty, charm, grace, poise, blah blah blah. Or, perhaps they were marveling at the fact that even though she had just shot a man, she hadn't even broken into a sweat.
Jack suddenly spoke up.
"Come, luv, let meh show you 'round this place, savvy?" he asked, taking her hand and kissing it.
She-Pirate Mary Sue blushed. "Why, of course Jack. Where do you plan on taking us?"
"Oh, somewhere special, that on'y I know of, savvy? Where we can gaze out at the stars, thinking about our wonderful future together even though we only just met a few minutes ago," he replied, leading her out the door.
Somehow, they are suddenly at the docks by She-Pirate Mary Sue's ship. Where Will has gone, we can only wonder.
"Would you like some rum, luv?" asked Jack, pulling out a bottle and handing it to her.
"Oh yes, thank you Jack, but I don't think I'll be able to drink it all," She-Pirate Mary Sue replied, taking the rum and downing the whole bottle in one gulp.
All of a sudden, they are both drunk, Jack is shirtless, and they have a make out session, just like any other PotC Mary Sue story on ff.net.
The night goes on, they do naughty things, and then it is morning.
"Oh Jack," Mary Sue stated, tears welling up in her big, emerald eyes. "I have abandoned my plans to ransack this town because I love you so much!"
*cue weepy violin music*
"Aye, luv, I love you too, savvy?" Jack replied. (Mary Sue authors seem to love this word. What they don't seem to realize, however, is how ANNOYING it gets after the first 6 times that they use it.)
"It's just so horrible that I suddenly have to leave Port Royal and return to the sea to pillage and plunder and not give a hoot," She-Pirate Mary Sue stated, weeping onto Jack's shoulder.
She looked up into his eyes, and then they kissed, a kiss so passionate, so loving, so enduring.
*two hours later*
.so devoted, so sentimental, so fervent that the heavens themselves opened up and cried.(For all of you non-Mary Sue readers out there, that means it started to rain.)
They broke the kiss, and Jack placed his hands on the side of She-Pirate Mary Sue's perfect, Clearasil-commercial face.
"Goodbye."
*CUE EXTREMELY WEEPY VIOLIN MUSIC*
She-Pirate Mary Sue broke away from Jack's grip, sobbing, and ran to her ship, Spider-man jumping back up onto its deck. She stood on deck, waving sadly down to him. The ship set sail, where it promptly crashed into a rock and sank.
"Ah, well, that's that then," Jack stated, swaggering back to the Faithful Bride for some rum.
**THE END**
*Author's Note: Omg that was like so sad I didn't want to kil off she- pirate but I had to for the angst and Stuf and im just lyke so sad and stuff and now jack is hartbrokin and everything o well pweeze review I love them so much and Stuf. The end.
**REAL Author's Note: Sorry that that chapter was so short. I will try to have chapter three up by Saturday. This is NOT the end of the whole story, next up is the Many Adventures of Helpless-Maiden Mary Sue. Thanks, -Beads
*Disclaimer: I still do not own PotC, Will, or Jack. Dammit.
*Note: A BIG thank you to Artemis15, Onyx and S, Stefynae, Yao Kafei, Dre Ship-Ship, and Daroga's Rainy Daae. Your wonderful reviews are what keep me going. And thank you to Daroga's Rainy Daae for the many fabulous Mary Sue clichés that you have suggested; a few have made their way into mah story. Please continue to review, flame, criticize, anything you'd like. On to Chapter 2!!
**Another Note: I lied. Helpless-Maiden Mary Sue will not make her fabulous debut until next chapter. I know that you are all so very disappointed.
Chapter 2: She-Pirate Mary Sue: Part II
She-Pirate Mary Sue placed her smoking pistol back into its holster and helped the two astonished men to their feet. Perhaps they were staring at her beauty, charm, grace, poise, blah blah blah. Or, perhaps they were marveling at the fact that even though she had just shot a man, she hadn't even broken into a sweat.
Jack suddenly spoke up.
"Come, luv, let meh show you 'round this place, savvy?" he asked, taking her hand and kissing it.
She-Pirate Mary Sue blushed. "Why, of course Jack. Where do you plan on taking us?"
"Oh, somewhere special, that on'y I know of, savvy? Where we can gaze out at the stars, thinking about our wonderful future together even though we only just met a few minutes ago," he replied, leading her out the door.
Somehow, they are suddenly at the docks by She-Pirate Mary Sue's ship. Where Will has gone, we can only wonder.
"Would you like some rum, luv?" asked Jack, pulling out a bottle and handing it to her.
"Oh yes, thank you Jack, but I don't think I'll be able to drink it all," She-Pirate Mary Sue replied, taking the rum and downing the whole bottle in one gulp.
All of a sudden, they are both drunk, Jack is shirtless, and they have a make out session, just like any other PotC Mary Sue story on ff.net.
The night goes on, they do naughty things, and then it is morning.
"Oh Jack," Mary Sue stated, tears welling up in her big, emerald eyes. "I have abandoned my plans to ransack this town because I love you so much!"
*cue weepy violin music*
"Aye, luv, I love you too, savvy?" Jack replied. (Mary Sue authors seem to love this word. What they don't seem to realize, however, is how ANNOYING it gets after the first 6 times that they use it.)
"It's just so horrible that I suddenly have to leave Port Royal and return to the sea to pillage and plunder and not give a hoot," She-Pirate Mary Sue stated, weeping onto Jack's shoulder.
She looked up into his eyes, and then they kissed, a kiss so passionate, so loving, so enduring.
*two hours later*
.so devoted, so sentimental, so fervent that the heavens themselves opened up and cried.(For all of you non-Mary Sue readers out there, that means it started to rain.)
They broke the kiss, and Jack placed his hands on the side of She-Pirate Mary Sue's perfect, Clearasil-commercial face.
"Goodbye."
*CUE EXTREMELY WEEPY VIOLIN MUSIC*
She-Pirate Mary Sue broke away from Jack's grip, sobbing, and ran to her ship, Spider-man jumping back up onto its deck. She stood on deck, waving sadly down to him. The ship set sail, where it promptly crashed into a rock and sank.
"Ah, well, that's that then," Jack stated, swaggering back to the Faithful Bride for some rum.
**THE END**
*Author's Note: Omg that was like so sad I didn't want to kil off she- pirate but I had to for the angst and Stuf and im just lyke so sad and stuff and now jack is hartbrokin and everything o well pweeze review I love them so much and Stuf. The end.
**REAL Author's Note: Sorry that that chapter was so short. I will try to have chapter three up by Saturday. This is NOT the end of the whole story, next up is the Many Adventures of Helpless-Maiden Mary Sue. Thanks, -Beads
