Again with the Disclaimer? Didn't I already do this part? Ah, well. I'll say it again. I don't own Dark, Heero, Daisuke, Satoshi, or any other character in this, except for Talon. Teeth belongs to Ainohikari. Those are private property, so LAY OFF!!!

Talon: Bonjour! Sorry, had to say that, I'm taking French as a foreign language, and I've got it on the brain.

Teeth: *ignoring her very insane friend* Hi all! Welcome to Chapter 2 of Dark and Heero for the Insane! I'm trying to control Talon's insane urges, and it seems to be working, because she puts it all in this instead of using it to baffle all her friends.

Talon: But baffling you all is fun! ^_^

Teeth: -.- *nudges Talon* Aren't you forgetting something?

Talon: *blinks* Like what?

Teeth: *cough*TheShadowHawk*cough*TheLadyofLight*cough*

Talon: *hands her a handkerchief* You've got to watch that cold of yours. I think it's getting worse.

Teeth: *glomps Talon* What about thanking The Shadow Hawk and The Lady of Light?

Talon: Oooooh! *struggles out of her friend's grasp* Why didn't you say so? *ignores Teeth's glare* Thank you Shadow Hawk and Lady of Light for being my unofficial and unintended muses! I don't grovel... I present many and lavish gifts! *grin* Just so you readers out there know, I got tons of what I write from those two, and theirs is like 3 times better than mine, so go read their stuff! *growls* Go now! And no excuses! If you can't find them they're both on my fav authors list, so that takes care of one way you can back out. And despite what Teeth may think my insanity goes far beyond these pages! *notices Teeth's glare and begins to run away* Enjoy the story! *a long pursuit begins, involving Talon borrowing With's wings, and Teeth borrowing Heero's guns*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 2: The Museum and the Karaoke Bar

"That's inhumane!"

"Dark, for the last time, burn your magazines or we'll give them to Heero," Talon said, holding out the matches in one hand, and Dark's porn magazines in the other.

The thief shot a look at Heero, who was looking very smug. "Gee, I wonder why," came Daisuke's sarcastic voice. Dark ignored the younger boy, and snatched the things from Talon. Whimpering, he went over to the fireplace.

"Don't forget this, Fly Boy." Heero tossed a bottle of alcohol at Dark, who ducked just in time to avoid being hit in the head with it. The bottle bounced off the fireplace, and landed in Dark's lap.

"Thank you so much." The sarcasm dripping off that comment would've worked better than alcohol, but sarcasm, unfortunately, isn't flammable.

Reluctantly, Dark placed his porn in the fireplace, and poured alcohol on it (not much, it is porn, and he is a guy). Then, he squeezed his eyes shut, and threw a match onto his precious magazines.

As he heard them catch fire he started to wail, but Talon seized him and dragged him away. "All right, you've served your sentence."

The thief folded his arms as he was dragged, still sitting, into the bedroom, and glared at Heero. "I'll get you for this, Hee-man..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dark crouched behind a bush with With right next to him. "All right, here's the plan. You, changed into me, go first, but make certain you're seen. While they're chasing you, I'll go get the statue, then meet me back here after you lose the guards. Got it?" The fur ball nodded assent, and promptly became a copy of Dark. Dark/With crept away, and the real Dark waited to hear the alarm.

Suddenly, a hand landed on Dark's shoulder, and he spun, knife in hand, to face his attacker. Next second, he was blaring and lowered the knife, but didn't put it away. "Hee-man."

Heero stopped laughing silently at Dark, and brought out the Stare of Death. "I was just wondering what you were doing hiding in a bush at midnight outside a museum, Darkie," he returned acidly.

The thief sighed and shook his head. "Heero, Heero, Heero. I've already had all the paid vacation I'm going to get from my job this year. My boss'll be real mad if I don't get back to work."

"And who's your boss?"

"Why, myself, of course," he said matter-of-factly. "Income for a thief on vacation isn't so good you know. Not to mention how angry Talon'll be if I don't get her that dress she's been wanting."

Heero nodded, sympathy twisting his face. "Yeah, I know what you mean. Teeth has been bugging me to get a job with more regular hours than an assassin. It's worse than ever now because everybody worth killing seems to be dead already." He paused a moment, thinking. "Except you, but I don't want to be subjected to Talon's wrath." He shuttered.

Dark laughed, and patted his shoulder sympathetically. "How about a job where you make your own salary and hours?" Heero looked at him suspiciously. "Thieving."

Heero snorted. "If I even considered it, I'd be better than you."

"I very much doubt that, my misguided friend."

"Oh, yeah? How about a contest? First to get the statue is the better thief."

"But that takes the fun out of everything. Stealing is an art, and rushed stealing just sucks. Not to mention that the chase has to be cut short. That's my favorite part."

At that moment shouts were heard, and Dark silenced Heero. "That's With. He's distracting the guards," Dark whispered. He crept around the bush and watched as all the guards ran off after a shadow. Dark motioned for Heero to follow, then silently ran to the open museum door.

The two entered the building, and cautiously went down the halls.

Peeking around a corner, Dark noticed the notorious Hiwatari Satoshi, junior high police detective in charge of Dark's capture. "Stay here, and wait for my signal," he whispered to Heero. "We've got to get rid of this guy." Dark stepped around the corner and Satoshi blinked.

The thief swaggered forward, looking as if he owned the museum and everything in it. "Satoshi! My, it's been so long! I'll bet you were worried that you'd never get to chase me again, huh?" His voice lowered, became more intimate. "Or, were you more worried that you'd never see Daisuke again?" Satoshi blushed, and Dark laughed, mocking his discomfort.

Satoshi pulled his hand out of his pocket and casually presented the handcuffs. Dark shrugged, still grinning. "Now, now Satoshi. Don't you know that you'll never catch me? Especially not today."

"And why not today?" asked Satoshi in his usual calm, unruffled voice. He didn't seem bothered at all by Dark's confidence. He was used to it.

"Because of him" Dark jerked his thumb other his shoulder and Heero stepped out, pistol in hand.

"Don't let him kill anyone!" Daisuke's frantic should rang through Dark's head.

"Crap!" muttered Dark, and he went over to Heero's side and whispered to him. "You're not supposed to kill him, just keep him focused forward, and I'll knock him out."

"But I want to kill him. It's been so long since I killed..." Heero slowly pointed the gun at the stunned (for once) detective.

"No." Dark put his hand on the weapon and lowered it.

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No killing! Now, gimme that gun!" They grappled for a moment, and Dark emerged from the scuffle with the gun in manacled hands. "Huh?" He blinked at the handcuffs, then looked up to see Satoshi fighting Heero. Dark blinked a couple more times, then came up behind the detective and hit him over the head with the gun.

Heero lowered his fists, and they both blinked at the unconscious boy, then at Dark's manacles. "Nice distraction," Dark mumbled.

"Thanks."

"Shall we go?" Dark bowed and indicated the room with the statue in it.

"What about your handcuffs?"

"Oh, these?" Dark looked at them as if he'd forgotten they were there. "I've had worse." He shrugged.

Heero nodded, understanding. "As have I."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dark and Heero sat in the living room, playing a fighting game on the Play Station 2, trying to determine who was better at it. Meanwhile, the girls spoke in the bedroom.

Teeth sighed. "How long will they keep up this insane contest? It's always a draw, no matter what they do."

"Eventually they'll decide that it's a tie, and wait another week before challenging each other again. It's hopeless."

"Anyway, back to out conversation. How to get Heero to act romantic."

Talon thought for a moment. "Maybe if you sing to him?"

Teeth made a face. "Spontaneous singing? That's not romantic, that's stupid."

"Fine, fine. So shoot me, it was just an idea."

"Maybe, if I wasn't the only one singing..." She looked at Talon expectantly.

"What?! I don't want to sing!"

"It was your idea."

Talon was desperate now. "Why don't we go to a place where lots of people go to sing?"

"Like where? A karaoke bar?"

Talon just looked at her.

"Nani?! You're serious?!"

"It'll work, I know it will."

So, how do we get Hee-man to go?"

"DARK!! COME HERE!!" There was a minor crash from the other room, followed by a very loud curse. It seemed Dark had jumped, casing the PS2 to fall.

The thief limped into the room, no doubt from Heero having kicked him for knocking over the PS2, and glared at them. "Yes?"

Talon walked up to him, all sweet smiles, and gently took his arm. "Darkie."

"You want something. What?"

"We need to ask you a favor."

"Why should I perform this favor?"

"Because it involves humiliating Heero."

Suddenly, he was alert, and intent. "I'm all ears."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heero had fallen asleep on the couch, for lack of things to do, by the time the three conspirators poked their heads out of the bedroom that evening. Dark was smiling maliciously, and had an odd gleam in his eyes. The two girls looked as if they were steeling themselves for bloodshed.

All three crept forward, and positioned themselves around the sleeping assassin. Suddenly, they grabbed him, Talon and Teeth each took an arm, while Dark grabbed his legs.

There was a violent struggle, but eventually they got Heero into the back seat in between Talon and Dark. There were loud protests from Heero all the way there, even though he had no idea where they were going.

Teeth turned into the parking lot, and Heero's eyes went immediately to the large neon sign, which read 'Good Times Karaoke Bar.' He snorted. "Wrong name. It should be called 'Baka Bar.'" The other three snickered. Even Talon knew enough Japanese to know the word for idiot.

Heero was now too depressed by the sight of the sign to put up much of a fight, but he still managed to put a dent in the metal door as they went inside.

Teeth immediately disappeared, and Talon and Dark kept a close eye on Heero to make sure that he didn't decide to examine the damage to the door. Scowling, Heero sat at the bar and ordered a strong shot.

The lights went out a moment later, and he turned to the dark stage. A spotlight lit up the lone singer, and he nearly dropped the glass. Teeth stood up there, strawberry-blond hair pulled back into a permed ponytail, with a couple curls left out to frame her face. She wore a tight black dress that nearly reached the floor, but had two slits up the side that ended 4 in from her butt, and the neckline was so low that she itched to pull it up. It was a halter top, backless, and made of velvet. Her 4 in heels were the same color. The little makeup she wore was so natural that Heero didn't even know it was there, and her jewelry consisted of a single necklace, a black cord with a silver sword dangling point down, with the tip hidden by the top of her dress, and ruby studs that shone like drops of blood in the spotlight.

The music started, and she smiled, winking at Heero before she began to sing.

"Babe, I'm leaving, I must be on my way The time is drawing near My train is going, I see it in your eyes The love, the need, your tears But I'll be lonely without you And I'll need your love to see me through Please believe me, my heart is in your hands And I'll be missing you."

Heero watched her, enchanted by her voice. She started to walk off the stage to him with the microphone.

"You know it's you babe Whenever I get weary and I've had enough Feel like giving up You know it's you babe Giving me the courage and the strength I need Please believe that it's true"

She looked in his eyes.

"Babe, I love you."

He felt the love radiating off of her. He reveled in it.

"You know it's you babe Whenever I get weary and I've had enough Feel like giving up You know it's you babe Giving me the courage and the strength I need Please believe that it's true Babe, I love you."

She sat on his lap and sang quietly.

"Babe, I'm leaving, I'll say it once again Somehow try to smile I know the feeling we're trying to forget If only for a while But I'll be lonely without you And I'll need your love to see me through Please believe me, my heart is in your hands And I'll be missing you Babe, I love you."

She kissed him. Without a word, he scooped her up, and they retired to a corner for a Make Out Fest.

Dark, after his initial look at the stage, had a bottle of vodka in his hand, and looked at anything but Teeth throughout her performance. Talon had a very satisfied expression on her face, and had watched Heero, seeing his reaction to her plan.

However, when Dark next looked for her after Teeth left the stage, he couldn't find her anywhere. He was looking around, rather panicked, when the next song began. A little despondent, he took a drink and looked up at the stage, curious as to who it was.

Seeing none other than Talon, he spat out his mouthful of vodka, and ignored the curses of the slightly damp people in front of him. She was turned away, back to the crowd, head down, her undisciplined curls falling forward to cover her face. This dress, too, was backless, with strings laced across her back, holding the strapless dress to her. It was the color of blood, and clung to her in shimmering folds, seeming to flow and sparkles even as she stood still. It had a sloped hem; on the left side it ended 2 in from her butt, while on the other side it came to her knee. She wore narrow, 3 in crimson heels, the straps wrapped around her ankles.

The music started, and she slowly rolled her head, letting the curls fall off her face and down her back, then spun, arms behind her head, to face the crowd. The front of her dress was unadorned, but by no means plain. It was low enough that it showed the top of her breasts, but not enough to be uncomfortable. The fabric clung to her, accenting her curves, and hinting at the body underneath. She wore red lipstick, but that was the only noticeable makeup on her. The earrings she had were like miniature claws, and her necklace was a black serpentine dragon in the shape of a teardrop. She lowered her arms, slowly running them seductively down her sides, as she started to sing.

"I feel like I've been locked up tight For a century of lonely nights Waiting for someone to release me You're licking your lips And blowing kisses my way But that don't mean I'm gonna give it away Baby baby baby My body is saying let's go But my heart is saying no."

Talon danced with seduction and mystery on stage, grinning to herself as she saw Dark's eyes nearly pop out of his head. He had slowly moved to a table near the front, and was squeezing the bottle of vodka so hard that she was surprised it didn't shatter. He never glanced around, but had he it would've made him extremely angry, for every guy in the room had the same lust in their eyes that Dark had in his. Heero had even turned around to look fleetingly at the stage from the corner that he and Teeth still occupied.

"If you wanna be with me Baby there's a price to pay I'm a genie in a bottle You gotta rub me the right way If you wanna be with me I can make your wish come true You gotta make a big impression I gotta like what you do I'm a genie in a bottle baby You gotta rub me the right way honey I'm a genie in a bottle baby Come, come, come on and let me out"

Dark had finally realized that Talon was on a stage, and that meant that other people could see her, too. This thought made him angry, and he was fingering one of his knives, as if itching to drive it through some of the eyes of the men that were looking at her. She continued to dance, trying to hide the fond smile that was threatening to creep onto her face.

"I'm a genie in a bottle baby You gotta rub me the right way honey I'm a genie in a bottle baby Come, come, come on and let me out My body is saying let's go But my heart is saying no If you wanna be with me Baby there's a price to pay I'm a genie in a bottle You gotta rub me the right way If you wanna be with me I can make your wish come true You gotta make a big impression I gotta like what you do"

Heero now had an angry look in eyes that was plainly visible due to all the looks that he gave the stage, and this disturbed both the girls. Teeth was seething with anger and looked ready to take one of Heero's guns and shoot her friend, but decided against it, because apparently her boyfriend didn't like the effect Talon was having on him, and that satisfied her... for the moment.

"I'm a genie in a bottle baby You gotta rub me the right way honey I'm a genie in a bottle baby Come, come, come on and let me out If you wanna be with me Baby there's a price to pay I'm a genie in a bottle You gotta rub me the right way If you wanna be with me I can make your wish come true Just come and set me free baby And I'll be with you I'm a genie in a bottle baby Come, come, come on and let me out"

The music ended, and Talon left the stage to the immense relief of a certain three people in the crowd, and the disappointment of the majority of everyone else(there are girls in a karaoke bar, and I don't think that they were affected by her song... ewwww... bad thoughts...). As she came from backstage she was met by a very angry Heero. Startled, she stopped, and he grabbed her by the arm. "We're leaving. Now." Confused, she didn't protest, and the assassin led her to the other two who were already outside, Teeth very upset, and Dark rather dazed. She took to the shelter of Dark's arms, and watched as Heero went back to the bar and fiddled with something near the door. A few moments later he walked back to them, and they waited silently for something to happen.

Suddenly, a huge explosion replaced the karaoke bar, and a smile lit the faces of Teeth and Heero. "Actually, the name was appropriate. Good times..." Heero muttered as he turned away from the still burning building and they all made their way back to the car, ready to go back to the privacy of the apartment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Talon: So, there ya have it. My insane mind is finally put onto paper so that the world may view it... Ain't it beautiful? *sobs*

Teeth: *sigh* Well, I'm not sure what to say about this one, except that it was completely... uh... original. I don't think there's a better word for it except insane, but she already said that one... Anyway, please R&R so that we can tell if you like the insanity and twisted reasoning that we provide for your reading enjoyment.

Talon: Oh, Lady of Light, was that enough originality for you? We hardly took anything from yours and Shadow Hawk's story at all this chapter! Now that the story's gotten started I think there'll be a lot less plagiarism... Oh, and please tell me what you think of the story this time. Your last review was only about me givin you recognition, and I have... so... yea... I guess that'll all for now... Can you think of anything?