Chapter Three: Two Conversations
*When Sirius awoke the next morning around ten, he groggily sat up in bed. Last night had been great. He had had a date with a woman that had blown him away. She had been slightly older; therefore she had been more experienced.
Still, he had felt something missing from the woman and as soon as it had ended, he had left. Then he had gone out and gotten as drunk as he could. He hated to think why he couldn't find a woman to satisfy him. Hell, he hadn't found a woman he could stand for more than four or five dates since he had broken up with Arabella. Just then a loud owl's screech echoed in his ear, he swore and fell out of bed.
"Bloody birds." He muttered, trying to calm his pounding head, then he recognized the owl. "Oh, morning Sawbeak. If you'll hold on, I'll write Ara a reply." The owl screeched again, and Sirius winced. Owls!
Quickly he untied the letter from the leg and read the short sentences characteristic of Ara's messages to him. The words urgent, Brews, and ten thirty all struck warnings bells in his head, and he glanced at his clock again. The numbers were still a little fuzzy, but he faintly made out that it was indeed ten o'clock. Great! He could sleep for another ten minutes! Then he crawled back into his bed and pulled the covers up over his head.
Suddenly in a flurry of feathers and blankets, he found himself contending with Ara's owl as it pecked him. "Ow! Ow, ow, ow! Ruddy bird! Getter' off!" When he was done dancing and the room had stopped spinning, he found himself standing on his bed; the owl perched gracefully on the windowsill. She seemed rather pleased with herself.
"Yes, yes, I'm up. Aren't you happy?" He mocked the bird; who preened her brown feathers, ignoring him. Sirius grabbed Ara's note and wrote a quick 'yes' and then retied it to the bird. "Get out of here. Take it back to her, go!" He ordered. Slowly, as if she were making sure he wouldn't go back to sleep, the bird took off, heading for Lily and Arabella's apartment.
What the heck had been that bird's problem? Was something really that wrong that he couldn't afford to be late to this meeting? His tanned forehead wrinkled as he frowned and his serious face plastered on over the silly one he usually wore. His bones weren't settling right… Something was wrong- he could feel it. His instinct, finally honed after three years of working with aurors and James, not to mention his years at Hogwarts with Remus, told him that the balance of the world had just been upset… and that Ara knew what had happened.
Quickly Sirius took his shower, shaved, and looked at his choice in robes. All of them were dusty, stained, and smelled oddly like… cheese. Shaking his head, he sighed. Quickly casting a freshening charm on one of them, he slipped it on quickly and grabbed his money purse. Then he breathed in deeply and checked the clock. Ten twenty-seven. He would just be on time. Good. Without another thought, he apparated.
"Si!" He heard Ara's familiar voice ring in his ears as soon as he reappeared.
"Hey Ara."
"You look… worried." She told him, giving him a slight smile.
"I am. After I got your note and I got up, I realized my bones weren't settled. Something is wrong. And I think you know what it is?"
"Boy do I!" She chirped depressed. "Let's get a small table and some strong coffee, we have work to do." He nodded and stood in line at the counter while Ara grabbed a table and dragged over another chair. As she worked, her face clouded. Even Sirius had noticed something was wrong. This was not good.
When they had their coffee and had settled down into the usual comfortable silence, Ara decided it was now or never to tell Sirius. She just prayed to whichever deity was left above to care that he would know what to do.
"Si."
"Ok. Spill. What happened?"
"Lily and James happened." She moaned. Then she looked up sharply as Sirius began to laugh hysterically.
"Ara, you're joking me! You think this problem is Lily and James? But they're perfect! Ok. What's the real problem?"
"Sirius, I'm serious. Lily and James are the problem. Or rather, James is the problem." He stopped laughing when he caught the blank stare she was wearing on her face.
"What? What's wrong with James?"
"It's like this: James is a workaholic, and he's so wrapped up in everything that he's ignoring Lily."
"That isn't a huge, urgent crisis. It's happened before Ara. I'll just have a chat with him about it."
"No Sirius. It's different this time. James has gotten so bad that Lily is seriously beginning to think he's using her. And she's been up all night crying over it."
"Lily's crying?" Now Sirius's face grew white. No one was allowed to make Lily cry! No one! Especially not when James was around. It went back to their old school days when he and Ara and James had made a promise between the three of them that they would never let anyone hurt Lily the way her sister had hurt her in the past. They had made a promise, and if Lily was crying, it was time to put it into effect.
"She's heartbroken Si."
"Has she told James? Does he know?"
"That's one of the problems!" Ara slammed her fist down on the cold, rod-iron table. "She's worried about adding stress to his workload."
"James has been a nerve job lately. I can't even prank in the office anymore because he gets so jumpy that it backfires and I get hit with the prank. I don't think he's taken a break in four weeks, not even weekends."
"And Lily said she doesn't think he's been eating. She says he looks like a ghost."
"Well, alright, he does look like hell. But I do too, on occasion."
"Sirius, this isn't on occasion. This is on a normal, every day basis. And Lily's so frustrated with the whole thing that she thinks James doesn't love her anymore." Ara had to smirk slightly when Sirius's jaw dropped. "In fact…"
"In fact?" He implored her.
"She's thinking about going back to the muggle world." Silence befell the table as Sirius tried to comprehend what Ara had just said. Lily wanted to what?
"How can she even think like that?" He whispered. "Does she realize what she has? She is the most powerful witch in this city, possibly in the wizarding world. She is constantly being offered jobs in three different branches of the ministry, not to mention she has us, a good home, and the man she loves."
"But Sirius. Lily doesn't care if she's the most powerful witch. In fact, I doubt she even knows that she is. And her job? She's sick of it. And it isn't just working with muggle things she's tired of, it's everything. She's bored. Yes, she does have us, but now she even doubts whether or not she has the man she loves. James is so wrapped up that she doesn't think he cares anymore, so why should she?"
"Does he know about this?"
"No. The stress thing again."
"This isn't right. Lily can't go back to the muggle world. She doesn't belong there. She's a witch, a powerful one, and she belongs here with her own kind."
"Who's to say that she doesn't belong with the muggles either? I mean, I was half muggle, though I was raised in the wizarding world, and I know that she would fit in just as well there as over here."
"No, she wouldn't." Sirius shook his head. "That is not true."
"How do you know?"
"Ara." He looked her in the eye, his mouth set in a grim straight line, which appeared more as a frown. "Lily does not belong anywhere out in the muggle world. She is one of us; she belongs here with us. She could never give up that part of her enough to allow her to fit in with the muggles."
"Well then. You'd better help me think of a way to bring James back to reality before Lily decides she really will pick up and leave."
"Right. I think it's time I had another chat with Prongs."
)(
Lily padded softly across the mossy grass. Past the giant upright willow, through stone archways, and over the beaten trail her feet carried her to the edge of the Forbidden Forest. And then she knocked on the wooden door of the quaint hut that sat beside it.
"Who's there?" The scruffy voice instantly answered.
"It's me!" She called. Then there was a rattling on the door and chain locks were removed. Then the door opened wide.
"Lily!" The big, grizzly man cheered. He grappled her into his arms and hugged her tightly to him. Lily's nose inhaled the familiar scent of his mole rat overcoat and felt the itchy scratch of his beard upon her face.
"Hello Hagrid. Too busy for a visitor?"
"Never too busy for one like yourself!" He laughed and hustled her into the hut. It was the same as she remembered it- roomy and warm.
"How've you been Hagrid?"
"Been rather well lately. Got myself a new creature I did!" His chest busted with pride and Lily gave him a smile. "It's called a Limmper." He pulled her over to peek in a box settled on his table. Inside was a tiny cat like creature with a pig's tail and a dog's snout. "Them Limmper's is fun- they can melt metals- chain, iron, copper, you name it."
"Wow. Sounds like a great tool for a locksmith." She grinned lightly.
"Locksmith?" He questioned. She sighed.
"A man in the muggle world who picks locks. You call him if you've gone and misplaced your keys, or locked them inside and can't get to them."
"Ah yes. Well, I do think my Limmper would be good for your locksmith, but I won't be lending a magical creature to a muggle all the same!" He laughed and Lily smiled sadly again.
"Alright Lily. What's gone on. I know when you aren't happy."
"Oh Hagrid, it's horrible." She cried, flinging herself into his warm hug. He reminded her of her father when she had been sad, always comforting.
"There now. What's horrible?"
"James!" Hagrid looked a little shocked, but he hid it well.
"James now? What's he done?"
"He's not in love with me anymore, that's what." Now Hagrid shot up.
"What!?"
"I mean, well, he hasn't come right out and said it, but it's there in the way he treats me… he doesn't need to tell me with words."
"How does he treat you now?"
"Like I'm only there for a meal ticket and the charms he can't perform. He either ignores me, or snaps at me the rest of the time. And he's been working so hard lately I don't even get to se him that much very often."
"Lily, are you sure this is James?"
"Yes!" She yelled. "I would know if James still cared, and I think it's obvious he doesn't. He's forgotten everything Hagrid. He isn't the James I love, he's an empty ghost."
"I never imagined James would act like that, just using someone." Hagrid muttered.
"I know. Like I said, he isn't himself, he's this stranger I don't know. He doesn't even prank anymore."
"No pranking?"
"Or smiling. Or laughing. Everything has to be silent around him, or he gets angry."
"Have you told him?"
"I can't." She shook her head. "Every time I want to, he ends up yelling before I get a word in edgewise. And I don't want to add to his stress. I just wish he still loved me!"
"He does Lily, he does! He's just busy… I'm sure it'll end in no time."
"He's been this way for the better part of a year Hagrid. I'm beginning to have my doubts." She sniffed.
"A year!" He whistled.
"Hagrid, I'm thinking of going back to the muggle world. Just for a little while. What do you think?"
"Muggles? I don't know Lily. How long?"
"A year. Maybe two. Three. Forever." She sighed wistfully. Hagrid gasped.
"Lily, you don't mean it."
"I do. I'm sick of this Hagrid. The wizarding world was so exciting to me at one time, but now… now it's routine and boring. And without James, I don't feel anything keeping me here except you, Ara, Sirius, and Remus. And even Remus is in some far away country, so it doesn't seem to matter."
"But forever?"
"Only to avoid James. I could never face him again. Knowing that I still love him, but that he's so annoyed with me that he can't even look at me?"
"Lily, I won't say you can't. But I wish you wouldn't. What with, well, You-Know-Who out these right now, it isn't safe for you to be with muggles."
"Well, it isn't safe working to protect muggles in the Ministry either, and that means it's not safe anywhere. I would rather take my chances living in the muggle world, because that way I would be able to at least have the best of both worlds. I mean, living in the muggle world doesn't mean I can't use magic, and I will be closer to others…"
"And farther away from me. I don't like it!" Hagrid snorted. He had no problem with muggles… in fact, he rather liked their simplicity. But all the same, he wanted Lily near him, where he could keep an eye on her and know she was safe and protected near people that would take care of her vulnerable self-esteem.
"So you don't like the idea?"
"No. I think you need to tell James. Talk to him. Once you point out what a git he's being, he'll realize it and fix himself up."
"Do you really believe that?"
"I do. Just talk to him, don't take no for a answer."
"Alright Hagrid. I'll try talking to James." *
