A/N! Thank you all so much for the reviews, I *really* appreciate them all! I guess I'll try and keep going. Oh, and I'm sorry for the messed up HTML in the first chapter, me and ff.net are just getting to know each other I guess. I also realize I spelt 'toilets' incorrectly in chapter one, pretty embarrassing!
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As Gordie walked to Jessica's locker with Chris after last period, he was mentally reviewing how to act around Elizabeth. Stand up straight! Smile! Flick hair out of eyes! Call her 'babe'! Don't-
"'Babe'?" Chris said next to him. "No, I don't think so, Lachance. You're definitely not cool enough to pull off 'babe'. Plus, you don't even know her. And plus, no girl wants to be called 'babe'. I mean, if I called someone 'babe', they would probably just wind up and hit me in the-"
"Chris!" Gordie barked. "What the hell are you talking about? God, you'd think spending time with Jessica would give you brain cells, since she clearly has very little use for hers and is therefore handing them out for free, but you just get weirder every damned day. Any girl would love to be called 'babe', especially when coupled with the famous Lachance hair-flick and- Wait. Back up. How did you know I was thinking of calling Elizabeth 'babe'? Not that I was."
"You were speaking out loud," Chris informed him. "Actually, you were kind of speaking out loud and standing up real straight and smiling. You were, in fact, hitting on the whole school."
"I was mentally reviewing," Gordie explained.
"Try and do it silently next time," Chris advised him. "And I don't appreciate what you said about my girlfriend, by the way, but I was too busy hoping you weren't calling ME babe to say so at the time. What are we gonna do now anyway?"
"When your flake of a girlfriend has showed up," Gordie said as they leaned against Jessica's locker, "we can go to the treehouse where you and Jess can sit quietly and supervise the process of Elizabeth falling in love with me."
Chris looked at him silently.
"What?" Gordie demanded. "Like it's unlikely? I'm unloveable? 'Cause listen, Chambers, this smile can melt a female heart at twenty paces! In fact, it probably has the same effect on men! My kissability is higher than yours will ever be, so just-"
"Gordie," Chris said slowly. "I'm not doubting your, uh, kissability- and if you ever repeat what I just said in front of anyone else, I'll beat the shit out of you- I'm just curious. Why do you like Elizabeth so much? You don't even know the girl. You told her that you liked to swim, then you, like, died in front of her."
"She's pretty," Gordie said dreamily. "She has green eyes that you fall into. And her hair shines like newly-brushed ponies."
"Ponies?" Chris asked. "Wait, never mind, I don't even want to know."
"Chris," Gordie said, turning to him. "I just like her. I don't know why. She's really pretty and she seems nice and her accent makes me feel like I've just been kicked in the stomach, but in the best way ever. So the only question is, do you think she'll like me?"
Chris grinned at him. "Sure. If I was a girl, I'm sure I'd like you." Gordie grimaced at him. "I'm just trying to be supportive. I don't think you're cute, Lachance."
"Shut up! Okay, so I'm just going to flirt with her. Really, really hard. Chris, this might sound weird, but can I- can I practice on you?"
Chris almost fell into the locker. "Hell no! Use Jessica, use Vern, use my brother, but you are calling me babe and flicking your hair at me. Look, here's Jessica. Flirt away."
Jessica ran up to them so fast she crashed into the lockers. "Oh, Goddamnit, that hurt. Hi. I'm sorry I'm late, but I set fire to my shoe."
Chris looked at her.
"Don't even ask," Jessica said irritably. "Let's go." She turned to Gordie and did a double take. Gordie was smiling at her with his eyebrow raised, flicking his hair wildly. "What- Gordie- Chris, why is he looking at me like that?"
"Do you like it, babe?" Gordie asked, leaning close to her. "Does it make you feel all funny inside?"
"Chris," Jessica said, practically climbing inside her boyfriend's shirt. "He's creeping me out. If you don't make him stop, I'll set fire to a chipmunk and throw it- No, I didn't say that. I'll set fire to something and throw it at your house in the middle of the night."
"Stop it now, Gordie," Chris said, putting a comforting arm around Jessica. "Gordie, stop flicking your hair. Gordie. Lachance, cut it out!"
Gordie tossed his hair so vigorously he practically gave himself whiplash, but he continued smiling at Jessica, who hid behind Chris, who was growing more annoyed by the second. In the end, Chris sighed.
"Lachance," Chris said softly, leaning close to him. "You're beginning to make me feel so... So funny, inside-"
"Okay!" Gordie said, leaping back. "I get it, I'll stop. Jeez, some friends you wet ends are. A guy tries to practice his flirting, and all he gets-"
"That was flirting?" Jessica asked, peering up at him from underneath her hair. "God, that was terrible flirting, Gordie. I feel more fluttery when Eyeball flirts with me."
"Eyeball flirts with you?!" Chris turned to her. "When? Where? Where was I? What were you doing?"
"Relax," Jessica said quickly, snuggling up to him. "I ignore the flutters. In fact, they weren't flutters, even. They were probably gas."
Chris made a face. "Thanks, Jessie."
"Jessica," Gordie said impatiently. "Is Elizabeth meeting us here?"
"No," Jessica said in suprise. "Who said she was? She said she'd come to the treehouse later, though."
"Okay," Gordie grinned happily. "We'll stay there all night. We'll sleep there if we have to. We will become treehouse-dwellers. Or something. Whatever, we're just not leaving. To the treehouse!"
/////
Five hours, nine bottles of Coke, one packet of cigarettes, eighteen Twinkies and twelve games of three-penny scat which left Jessica seventy-two cents richer later, Chris was growing impatient.
"Gordie, I don't think she's coming."
"No, she is," Jessica said lazily from her position on the floor. "She definitely said she would. She's unpacking. Maybe a family of chipmunks took up residence in her suitcase and she's finding them all homes." She sat up, alarmed. "I could be missing an opportunity to get My First Chipmunk!"
"No, Jessie, I don't think so," Chris said soothingly. "Lie down again. Gordie, seriously."
"Just. A little. Longer," Gordie said tightly. "Let's play another game of scat, okay?"
Chris winced. "I don't have much more money to lose, man."
"Well, then I guess Jessica can't play," Gordie said cheerfully, shuffling the cards.
"No, I wanna play!" Jessica sat up and shuffled over to a box-seat. "I'll try really, really hard not to win, though, okay?"
"You better try really hard," Chris said threateningly. "The more money I lose here, the less I have to spend on pretty things for you."
Jessica smiled at him. "The only pretty thing I want is you." Chris grinned back at her and leaned over to kiss her, prompting Gordie to groan loudly and cover his eyes.
"Great, now you two are getting mushy."
Jessica scowled at him. "That's 'cause you've been keeping us here! Usually we would have been making out for the last two hours. If I end up pregnant as a result of being held hostage in this treehouse, I'll make you pay for my medical bills."
Gordie snickered. "Jess, it takes a man and a woman to make a baby, remember? Two women together do not a baby make."
"I'm not a woman!" Jessica cried, stung. "Wait, I mean, Chris isn't a woman! He's more manly than you, Lachance. Show him, Chris. Take off your pants."
"Maybe later," Chris said. "I don't like making my best friend feel inadequate, Jessie. He already called me 'babe' today."
Jessica looked curiously over to Gordie.
"I did not!" Gordie cried. "I was mentally reviewing! Mentally! Reviewing!"
"Girls don't like being called babe," Jessica informed him. "Well, I don't."
"You like being called chipmunk," Gordie reminded her. "I don't think you qualify as a normal girl."
"Just deal," Chris said impatiently. Gordie rolled his eyes and did so, giving them all three cards. Jessica picked up her cards and hesitated. Gordie looked at her and sighed in frustration.
"Just do it, Jess."
Jessica smiled happily and knocked on the table. "I knock."
Chris and Gordie threw down their cards. Jessica looked wounded.
"That's not fair! You have to at least draw another card."
"What's the point?" Chris asked. "You have thirty one, right?"
"Yes," Jessica told him. "But at least go through the motions. It makes winning more fun."
Chris sighed and picked up another card. Gordie did the same.
"Twelve," Gordie said.
"Eighteen," Chris said.
"Thirty one," Jessica said happily, picking up their pennies. "I love this game."
Gordie growled and swept the cards off the table. "I'm never playing with you again. Not until you get off this winning streak."
"Okay, she's not coming," Chris said impatiently. "Gordie, can we go? Please?"
Gordie looked from his pleading face to Jessica's. He sighed and drained the last of his Coke.
"You're right," he said sadly. "She's not coming. Thanks for hanging out anyway, guys."
"No problem," Chris said, patting him on the shoulder. "I'm sorry, man. Maybe tomorrow."
Jessica nodded, grabbing her bag. "She'll definitely come tomorrow. Maybe she'll even bring the chipmunks."
Gordie looked at Chris. "You better explain to your girlfriend that there are no chipmunks, Chris."
"I'll get on it," Chris promised. "See you tomorrow, Gordo. Come on, Jessie." Chris disappeared through the trapdoor.
"Bye Gordie," Jessica said sweetly, giving him a hug. "Don't worry. Just work on the hair-flicking. How could any girl resist you?"
Gordie held the trapdoor open for her and watched the two walk away, hand in hand, Jessica's voice floating up through the air- "What do you mean, Elizabeth has no chipmunks? I saw them!"- and Chris's- "No, you didn't, Jessie! If you're telling me you've started to see chipmunks again, I'm going to make you quit smoking. It does crazy things to your head."
Gordie grinned and closed the trapdoor, plopping down on a box and sighing. Chris and Jessica were his best friends and they never made him feel left out, but he envied their closeness so much. Gordie had had his share of girlfriends, but nothing serious. He wanted to look at a girl with the same look Chris had in his eyes when he looked at Jessica- like if anything in the world tried to hurt her, he would kill them.
Gordie was shaken out of his thoughts by a knock on the trapdoor. He leaned over automatically and opened it, expecting it be Jessica bitching about how she'd left her Chemistry textbook or her Spanish textbook or, hell, any textbook, up there. Instead, he heard the voice that made his stomach feel like it had just been kicked by an angel wearing really big boots.
"Hi, Gordie," Elizabeth said, beaming up at him. "Am I too late?"
As Gordie walked to Jessica's locker with Chris after last period, he was mentally reviewing how to act around Elizabeth. Stand up straight! Smile! Flick hair out of eyes! Call her 'babe'! Don't-
"'Babe'?" Chris said next to him. "No, I don't think so, Lachance. You're definitely not cool enough to pull off 'babe'. Plus, you don't even know her. And plus, no girl wants to be called 'babe'. I mean, if I called someone 'babe', they would probably just wind up and hit me in the-"
"Chris!" Gordie barked. "What the hell are you talking about? God, you'd think spending time with Jessica would give you brain cells, since she clearly has very little use for hers and is therefore handing them out for free, but you just get weirder every damned day. Any girl would love to be called 'babe', especially when coupled with the famous Lachance hair-flick and- Wait. Back up. How did you know I was thinking of calling Elizabeth 'babe'? Not that I was."
"You were speaking out loud," Chris informed him. "Actually, you were kind of speaking out loud and standing up real straight and smiling. You were, in fact, hitting on the whole school."
"I was mentally reviewing," Gordie explained.
"Try and do it silently next time," Chris advised him. "And I don't appreciate what you said about my girlfriend, by the way, but I was too busy hoping you weren't calling ME babe to say so at the time. What are we gonna do now anyway?"
"When your flake of a girlfriend has showed up," Gordie said as they leaned against Jessica's locker, "we can go to the treehouse where you and Jess can sit quietly and supervise the process of Elizabeth falling in love with me."
Chris looked at him silently.
"What?" Gordie demanded. "Like it's unlikely? I'm unloveable? 'Cause listen, Chambers, this smile can melt a female heart at twenty paces! In fact, it probably has the same effect on men! My kissability is higher than yours will ever be, so just-"
"Gordie," Chris said slowly. "I'm not doubting your, uh, kissability- and if you ever repeat what I just said in front of anyone else, I'll beat the shit out of you- I'm just curious. Why do you like Elizabeth so much? You don't even know the girl. You told her that you liked to swim, then you, like, died in front of her."
"She's pretty," Gordie said dreamily. "She has green eyes that you fall into. And her hair shines like newly-brushed ponies."
"Ponies?" Chris asked. "Wait, never mind, I don't even want to know."
"Chris," Gordie said, turning to him. "I just like her. I don't know why. She's really pretty and she seems nice and her accent makes me feel like I've just been kicked in the stomach, but in the best way ever. So the only question is, do you think she'll like me?"
Chris grinned at him. "Sure. If I was a girl, I'm sure I'd like you." Gordie grimaced at him. "I'm just trying to be supportive. I don't think you're cute, Lachance."
"Shut up! Okay, so I'm just going to flirt with her. Really, really hard. Chris, this might sound weird, but can I- can I practice on you?"
Chris almost fell into the locker. "Hell no! Use Jessica, use Vern, use my brother, but you are calling me babe and flicking your hair at me. Look, here's Jessica. Flirt away."
Jessica ran up to them so fast she crashed into the lockers. "Oh, Goddamnit, that hurt. Hi. I'm sorry I'm late, but I set fire to my shoe."
Chris looked at her.
"Don't even ask," Jessica said irritably. "Let's go." She turned to Gordie and did a double take. Gordie was smiling at her with his eyebrow raised, flicking his hair wildly. "What- Gordie- Chris, why is he looking at me like that?"
"Do you like it, babe?" Gordie asked, leaning close to her. "Does it make you feel all funny inside?"
"Chris," Jessica said, practically climbing inside her boyfriend's shirt. "He's creeping me out. If you don't make him stop, I'll set fire to a chipmunk and throw it- No, I didn't say that. I'll set fire to something and throw it at your house in the middle of the night."
"Stop it now, Gordie," Chris said, putting a comforting arm around Jessica. "Gordie, stop flicking your hair. Gordie. Lachance, cut it out!"
Gordie tossed his hair so vigorously he practically gave himself whiplash, but he continued smiling at Jessica, who hid behind Chris, who was growing more annoyed by the second. In the end, Chris sighed.
"Lachance," Chris said softly, leaning close to him. "You're beginning to make me feel so... So funny, inside-"
"Okay!" Gordie said, leaping back. "I get it, I'll stop. Jeez, some friends you wet ends are. A guy tries to practice his flirting, and all he gets-"
"That was flirting?" Jessica asked, peering up at him from underneath her hair. "God, that was terrible flirting, Gordie. I feel more fluttery when Eyeball flirts with me."
"Eyeball flirts with you?!" Chris turned to her. "When? Where? Where was I? What were you doing?"
"Relax," Jessica said quickly, snuggling up to him. "I ignore the flutters. In fact, they weren't flutters, even. They were probably gas."
Chris made a face. "Thanks, Jessie."
"Jessica," Gordie said impatiently. "Is Elizabeth meeting us here?"
"No," Jessica said in suprise. "Who said she was? She said she'd come to the treehouse later, though."
"Okay," Gordie grinned happily. "We'll stay there all night. We'll sleep there if we have to. We will become treehouse-dwellers. Or something. Whatever, we're just not leaving. To the treehouse!"
/////
Five hours, nine bottles of Coke, one packet of cigarettes, eighteen Twinkies and twelve games of three-penny scat which left Jessica seventy-two cents richer later, Chris was growing impatient.
"Gordie, I don't think she's coming."
"No, she is," Jessica said lazily from her position on the floor. "She definitely said she would. She's unpacking. Maybe a family of chipmunks took up residence in her suitcase and she's finding them all homes." She sat up, alarmed. "I could be missing an opportunity to get My First Chipmunk!"
"No, Jessie, I don't think so," Chris said soothingly. "Lie down again. Gordie, seriously."
"Just. A little. Longer," Gordie said tightly. "Let's play another game of scat, okay?"
Chris winced. "I don't have much more money to lose, man."
"Well, then I guess Jessica can't play," Gordie said cheerfully, shuffling the cards.
"No, I wanna play!" Jessica sat up and shuffled over to a box-seat. "I'll try really, really hard not to win, though, okay?"
"You better try really hard," Chris said threateningly. "The more money I lose here, the less I have to spend on pretty things for you."
Jessica smiled at him. "The only pretty thing I want is you." Chris grinned back at her and leaned over to kiss her, prompting Gordie to groan loudly and cover his eyes.
"Great, now you two are getting mushy."
Jessica scowled at him. "That's 'cause you've been keeping us here! Usually we would have been making out for the last two hours. If I end up pregnant as a result of being held hostage in this treehouse, I'll make you pay for my medical bills."
Gordie snickered. "Jess, it takes a man and a woman to make a baby, remember? Two women together do not a baby make."
"I'm not a woman!" Jessica cried, stung. "Wait, I mean, Chris isn't a woman! He's more manly than you, Lachance. Show him, Chris. Take off your pants."
"Maybe later," Chris said. "I don't like making my best friend feel inadequate, Jessie. He already called me 'babe' today."
Jessica looked curiously over to Gordie.
"I did not!" Gordie cried. "I was mentally reviewing! Mentally! Reviewing!"
"Girls don't like being called babe," Jessica informed him. "Well, I don't."
"You like being called chipmunk," Gordie reminded her. "I don't think you qualify as a normal girl."
"Just deal," Chris said impatiently. Gordie rolled his eyes and did so, giving them all three cards. Jessica picked up her cards and hesitated. Gordie looked at her and sighed in frustration.
"Just do it, Jess."
Jessica smiled happily and knocked on the table. "I knock."
Chris and Gordie threw down their cards. Jessica looked wounded.
"That's not fair! You have to at least draw another card."
"What's the point?" Chris asked. "You have thirty one, right?"
"Yes," Jessica told him. "But at least go through the motions. It makes winning more fun."
Chris sighed and picked up another card. Gordie did the same.
"Twelve," Gordie said.
"Eighteen," Chris said.
"Thirty one," Jessica said happily, picking up their pennies. "I love this game."
Gordie growled and swept the cards off the table. "I'm never playing with you again. Not until you get off this winning streak."
"Okay, she's not coming," Chris said impatiently. "Gordie, can we go? Please?"
Gordie looked from his pleading face to Jessica's. He sighed and drained the last of his Coke.
"You're right," he said sadly. "She's not coming. Thanks for hanging out anyway, guys."
"No problem," Chris said, patting him on the shoulder. "I'm sorry, man. Maybe tomorrow."
Jessica nodded, grabbing her bag. "She'll definitely come tomorrow. Maybe she'll even bring the chipmunks."
Gordie looked at Chris. "You better explain to your girlfriend that there are no chipmunks, Chris."
"I'll get on it," Chris promised. "See you tomorrow, Gordo. Come on, Jessie." Chris disappeared through the trapdoor.
"Bye Gordie," Jessica said sweetly, giving him a hug. "Don't worry. Just work on the hair-flicking. How could any girl resist you?"
Gordie held the trapdoor open for her and watched the two walk away, hand in hand, Jessica's voice floating up through the air- "What do you mean, Elizabeth has no chipmunks? I saw them!"- and Chris's- "No, you didn't, Jessie! If you're telling me you've started to see chipmunks again, I'm going to make you quit smoking. It does crazy things to your head."
Gordie grinned and closed the trapdoor, plopping down on a box and sighing. Chris and Jessica were his best friends and they never made him feel left out, but he envied their closeness so much. Gordie had had his share of girlfriends, but nothing serious. He wanted to look at a girl with the same look Chris had in his eyes when he looked at Jessica- like if anything in the world tried to hurt her, he would kill them.
Gordie was shaken out of his thoughts by a knock on the trapdoor. He leaned over automatically and opened it, expecting it be Jessica bitching about how she'd left her Chemistry textbook or her Spanish textbook or, hell, any textbook, up there. Instead, he heard the voice that made his stomach feel like it had just been kicked by an angel wearing really big boots.
"Hi, Gordie," Elizabeth said, beaming up at him. "Am I too late?"
