It's so hard to be a teen-mutant-superhero By: Umbravulpes

Disclaimer: Oh, why do I bother?

Authors Note: Oh poop! I haven't updated for so long! I'm so sorry, I'm sure there was some kind of good reason for it, I just don't know what.

I'm one sad little writer, no one reviewed my last chapter. Oh well. I got all inspired, when my class was systematically destroing the local golf course's laws during gym.

SCENE 15

The Institute, where else?

(Everyone is gathered in the Hall)

SCOTT:

All right men!

KITTY:

Ahem!

SCOTT:

I mean persons! We must defend ourselves without hurting the mob.

PIETRO:

Why?

SCOTT:

We don't want to get sued by The Angry Mob Protection Organisation.

ROGUE:

Great. The mob has a protection organisation and what do we have?

KURT:

Cool costumes!

SCOTT:

Anyway, I think we should build a barricade!

(heroic music)

JEAN:

Scott, honey, what good is that going to do?

SCOTT:

I don't know, but we have do it anyway. It's in the script.

TODD:

What? Since when have we had a script?

SCOTT:

Come on guys, you know about the script.

EVERYONE ELSE:

No.

SCOTT:

Okay. Anyway, we have to build that barricade. If only because the Author wants to put in the next song for some reason.

PIETRO:

Right! Vive la revo- I mean- evolution!

ALL:

Vive la evolution!

*DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE/MUTANTS SING? (Les Miserables)*

*SCOTT*

Do you hear the mutants sing?

Singing a song of angry men?

It is the music of the mutants

Who will not be called freaks again!

When the beating of your heart

Echos the beating of the drums

There is a life about to start

When tomorrow comes!

*PIETRO*

Will you join in our crusade?

Who will be strong and stand with me?

Somewhere beyond the barricade

Is there a world you long to see?

*JEAN*

Then join in the fight

That will give you the right to be free!!

*ALL*

Do you hear the mutants sing?

Singing a song of angry men?

It is the music of the mutants

Who will not be called freaks again!

When the beating of your heart

Echos the beating of the drums

There is a life about to start

When tomorrow comes!

*SCOTT*

Will you give all you can give

So that our banner may advance

Some will fall and some will live

Will you stand up and take your chance?

The blood of the martyrs

Will water the lawns of Bayville!

*ALL*

Do you hear the mutants sing?

Singing a song of angry men?

It is the music of the mutants

Who will not be called freaks again!

When the beating of your heart

Echos the beating of the drums

There is a life about to start

When tomorrow comes!

(The building of a massive barricade infront of the Institute ensues)

SCOTT:

Put chairs to the left nad tables to the right.

FRED:

You want the mob to break this fine set of hand-carved, oak Biedermaier diningroom furniture?

SCOTT:

As long as it's nothing important.

FRED:

But the price of items like these are very high at Christies.

SCOTT:

Uh... since when have you been an expert in fine furniture?

FRED:

I watch a lot of Antiques Road-Show.

SCOTT:

Just put everything that's useless to the barricade.

KURT:

Okay! Bye bye schoolbooks!

TODD:

I love you.

(KURT and TODD start making out)

KITTY:

I'm like liberal and all, but could you not like do that right now?

KURT:

Don't make us call Amnesty.

JEAN:

Well, we worked hard for five whole minutes, the barricade is done.

ROGUE:

Who put my guitar in it?

KITTY:

Scott told us to put useless things in the barricade.

ROGUE:

Just because no-one has ever seen me use my guitar doesn't mean it's useless.

PIETRO:

Can you two finish that discussion later? We have company.

(EPSTEIN and the MOB enter)

ROGUE:

Shit, here goes my heel again.

(ROGUE falls down the barricade, holding her aching heel)

EPSTEIN:

You freaks better give up!

MOB:

Give up! Give up!

SCOTT:

No we won't you... big meanie!

EPSTEIN:

Calling me names now are you?

TODD:

Your mama!

EPSTEIN:

No your mama!

MOB:

Your mama! Your mama!

TODD:

That's it, this guy is going down yo!

(General battleroars on all sides ensues)

EPSTEIN:

Enough manly grunting! Attack!

MOB:

Attack! Attack! Attack! Attack the big wall!

(The MOB runs against the barricade mindlessly)

EPSTEIN:

You idiots! Use your weapons!

(The MOB, those that still conscious, pull out their torches and pitchforks)

MOB:

Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill everything that's weird!

JEAN:

Oh what shall we do?

SCOTT:

I don't know Jean, I don't know.

LANCE:

There's only one thing to do! Sing!

*CAST AWAY (Notre Dame de Paris)*

*LANCE*

Cast away, souls at bay.

It's our dreams, they betray.

*PIETRO*

Now they say we can't stay.

Prayers we pray lost today.

*TODD*

Put the shade of your skin.

With the shade of my skin.

*FRED*

Put the song that you sing.

With the dance that I bring.

*ALL*

Refugees, downward bound.

Fill the streets of your town.

Can't we make a world, to which everyone belongs?

Can't we make a world, without fears without frontiers?

*JEAN*

We're called names we are blamed.

We're kept down we are shamed.

*ROGUE*

In the night torture comes.

Try to speak without tongues.

*SCOTT*

My homeland I hold here

In my heart ever near.

*KURT*

In your land I find tears.

Vords that hurt zings to fear.

*KITTY*

In my heart summer dies.

From your grey winter skies.

*ALL*

Can't we make a world, to which everyone belongs?

Can't we make a world, without fears without frontiers?

Cast away, souls at bay.

It's our dreams, they betray.

Now they say we can't stay.

Prayers we pray lost today.

Cast away.

Cast away.

(The rest of the MOB faints from all the mushy singing)

SCOTT:

We have won!

ALL:

Hurray!

EPSTEIN:

Have forgotten about me?

SCOTT:

Oh yeah. I guess we'll have to fight you now.

(heroic music)

EPSTEIN:

Wave of pain!

(Our heros The X.F.G.O.N.D.A.P.D.S.P. all fall down the barricade)

PIETRO:

Hey! That hurt you bastard!

EPSTEIN:

That was the point. Wave of pain!

KITTY:

Ow. I like hurt so much!

LANCE:

Kitty! Are you all right?

*A LITTLE FALL OF RAIN (Les Miserables)*

*KITTY*

Don't you fret, my dear Lance

I don't feel any pain

A little fall of rain

Can hardly hurt me now

You're here, that's all I need to know

And you will keep me safe

And you will keep me close

And rain will make the flowers grow.

*LANCE*

But you will live, Kitty - dear God above...

If I could close your wounds with words of love...

*KITTY*

Just hold me now, and let it be.

Shelter me, comfort me...

*LANCE*

You would live

A hundred years

If I could show you how

I won't desert you now...

*KITTY*

The rain can't hurt me now

This rain will wash away what's past

And you will keep me safe

And you will keep me close

I'll sleep in your embrace at last

The rain that brings you here

Is Heaven-blessed!

The skies begin to clear

And I'm at rest

A breath away from where you are

I've come home from so far

*KITTY/ LANCE*

So don't you fret, my dear Lance/ Hush-a-bye, dear Kitty-Kat

I don't feel any pain/ You won't feel any pain

A little fall of rain/ A little fall of rain

Can hardly hurt me now/ Can hardly hurt you now

I'm here/ That's all I need to know

And you will keep me safe/ I will stay with you

And you will keep me close/ Till you are sleeping

And rain/ And rain

Will make the flowers.../ Will make the flowers... (KITTY faints)

*LANCE* Grow.

EPSTEIN:

Hah hah haa!

SCOTT:

How dare you! We shall beat you!

LANCE:

You made my pussy faint! You're gonna pay! Earth tremor!

(The ground shakes, everyone, but EPSTEIN, trips over themselves)

EPSTEIN:

You fools! Wave of pain!

LANCE:

Ouch! (holds his head) This is worse then the first time I got drunk and made out with Pietro!

PIETRO:

Speeding fury!

(PIERTO tries to knock out EPSTEIN)

EPSTEIN:

Wave of pain!

(PIETRO falls down)

PIERTO:

My beautifull heads in such pain! I want my daddy!

JEAN:

Hit of brilliance!

EPSTEIN:

Arrows of pain!

JEAN:

Aaah, the pain!

SCOTT:

Jean!

(JEAN faints)

SCOTT:

Blasting glance of destruction!

(SCOTT tries to hit EPSTEIN, but misses, badly)

EPSTEIN:

Pathetic. Arrows of pain!

SCOTT:

Everyone! Behind the barricade!

Author's Note: What? You thought that I would make the battlescene in to just chapter? No way! So, r&r and let me know if you want that sequel or not.