Bil: Thanks for your comments. I hope you'll find the next few chapters VERY interesting!
Nadia/Munchkin: Good question, but don't forget that Keelin and Rhain had several meetings about Mordrid. She hasn't shared anything with Edwyn that she hasn't already shared with Rhain. As for Keelin's comments…well, we'll see. :)
RoyalNovelists: I'm not sure how long it will be because it's not finished yet. It's pretty lengthy already so I'm glad that hasn't deterred you and that you, in fact, see it as a plus!
MissyBabe and June Bug: Thanks to you both! Hope these chapters will make up for the wait.
rp: Where are you off to for 2 years PC-less? Wherever it is, good luck to you! I'll try my best to wrap the story up before you go.
Chapter 26
Rhain rose reluctantly from his bed the next morning. He felt as if an incredible weight were resting on his shoulders, pushing him into the ground. He could not believe that he was waking up as the prince of England for the last time, that when he awoke the following morning, he would be king. It was an overwhelming realization.
He walked over to one of his windows, pushing back the tapestry and gazing out. A frost had fallen during the night, causing the landscape to be dusted with white, a brilliant white that sparkled in the morning sunlight. Rhain thought of his father as he gazed out at the day and wondered what the king thought of his son now. He found that, for the first time in his life, he was afraid of truly disappointing his father.
"Father, I know that I can never be half the king that you were, but be with me now. Give me the strength, compassion, and wisdom that I need to be a fair and honest ruler to my people," Rhain said, softly. As he spoke, he felt a lightening of the weight on his shoulders, as if his father were truly there to help carry him through the day. "I love you, Father," Rhain said, tears rolling down his cheeks.
The prince heard his chamber door opening and he brushed his tears aside, squaring his shoulders. He turned around, expecting to see one of his servants, and was instead surprised to catch sight of his mother. She was clad in a simple dressing gown, her hair flowing over her shoulders and tumbling down her back. She looked so young, yet so old, her face lined with grief and worry. However, when she caught sight of her son, she smiled at him, making her look years younger and quite beautiful.
"Long have I thought of this day, even if I never did imagine it happening quite as it has," she said softly. He could see the pride in her teary eyes.
"I never imagined it this way either," Rhain said with a sigh.
"I know you think it your fault that your father was taken from us, but I know that you did all you could to protect him. We are all born to die and 'twas your father's time. There is nothing you could have done to prevent it. Things were meant to be this way," the queen said. Rhain was surprised by her composure.
"I cannot so easily believe that," he replied, turning away from her and toward the window once again.
"You cannot believe it because there is too much comfort in the thought and you do not feel yourself worthy of such comfort at this time," his mother said. Rhain had always known that she was wise, but he was surprised at her penetration. It was as if she could feel everything he was feeling.
"How can I feel that I deserve comfort? I watched my father slain before my eyes and now I am to take his place. What comfort is there in that thought?" He turned back to his mother, his agitation clearly written on his face.
"Come, there is something I must show you," his mother said, holding her hand out to him.
The prince took her hand and followed her from his chamber into that of his father. The chamber was eerily quiet and felt strangely empty. Rhain realized with a start that his father had always had such a presence that it was strongly felt wherever he had been, even when he was no longer there. It seemed that the spiritual presence had been extinguished along with his father's earthly presence.
The queen stopped at the far end of the chamber, but held onto her son's hand. She reached forward and opened the door of the king's massive, elaborately carved wardrobe. Rhain saw something white hanging inside and became increasingly perplexed. He looked at his mother and she indicated to him to take a closer look. The prince stepped forward and reached out to touch the garment. He soon found that it was a complete raiment, made up of a cape, flowing robes, and trunk hose. It was made of the richest satin and velvet, the cape liberally trimmed with the finest ermine.
"What is it?" Rhain asked.
"As you know, your father and I were married while he was still a prince. He was the second in line to the throne, never meant to become king himself. Our marriage helped seal an alliance between my father's region of the kingdom and that of your grandfather. Your grandfather and uncle went crusading only about a year after your father and I were married. Arthur was always bitter about having been left behind and those two years were some of the hardest of our lives. At last, we received horrible news. Your grandfather and uncle had been killed in the crusades, along with nearly all of their men. The kingdom was in a shambles and your father was to become its king, something he had never dreamed would occur. He was wracked with guilt, thinking that he had been the one meant to go crusading with his father, that he should have been the one killed. He felt that the throne belonged to his brother and that 'twas his fault his brother was not alive to claim it. Your father also did not feel that he was fit for the responsibility of being king and put off his coronation for as long as he could, claiming that he wanted to wait until a respectable period after his father was laid to rest. I knew that he was merely stalling for time.
"Then, one morning, he awoke and was quite a changed man. When I asked him what the matter was, he told me that his father had come to him in a dream. The former king had told his son that it had been his destiny to ascend to the throne all along. The king loved both of his sons, but in the dream he told your father that he chose to take your uncle along rather than your father because he had always known that your father was the one who was destined to someday become king. Your father and I were crowned the very next day. He understood that, no matter how painful the occurrences in his life over the course of the last few weeks had been, 'twas his destiny to be king. His father's and brother's deaths were tragic, but meant to be. And your father found much peace in that realization."
Rhain stared at his mother in amazement. He had of course, known the history of his father, but never in such detail. He was thunderstruck. It was unbelievable that his father had felt the same reluctance to take the throne that he now felt, that his father had felt the same overwhelming sense of responsibility that Rhain now felt.
"I still do not understand. What is the meaning of this garment?" Rhain asked, after a silence of several minutes. He could hardly speak the words.
"The day of the coronation, I wore a gown of pure white and your father wore white from head to toe," the queen said, her gaze meeting that of her son steadily.
"Is this…" Rhain could not even bear to ask the question, but his mother spared him the pain.
"That is not the raiment that your father wore. 'Tis the one that he had made for you."
"Made for me?" Rhain asked incredulously.
"Before you left for Germany, your father had a premonition of his death. He told me that he would not return, but that you would. He said that this was right, that his time had come to an end and 'twas now your time to be king." Tears rolled down the face of the queen as she spoke. "While you were preparing for the journey, he had this made for you. He asked me to tell you that no father could be prouder of his son and that he knew you would make a fine king for your kingdom, a better king even than he had ever been."
Rhain felt rooted to the spot as a thousand different emotions raced through him all at once. After all the years of misunderstanding, Rhain suddenly understood his father. It was awesome indeed for him to realize that the king had been almost exactly the same sort of man that his son now was. The prince now understood why he and his father had so often come to blows. All along, the king had been trying to spare his son from the painful anguish of indecision from which he had once suffered. Rhain now knew that his father truly loved him and that his father had taken great pride in him.
"Oh, mother," Rhain whispered and he took her in his arms as his tears spilled over. They cried together for a time before she finally pulled away from him and smiled at him tenderly, caressing his cheek.
"No son could have ever been more loved than you, by both of his parents. I, too, am proud of you and I know that you will be the best of kings. Now do you understand that this was meant to be?"
Rhain nodded, too overcome to speak. He embraced his mother once more and then kissed her fondly on the cheek.
"I love you, Mother," he said.
"I love you too," she answered, kissing him back. "Return to your chamber and prepare for your coronation. I will call the servants to bring your garments to you."
"Thank you, Mother. I cannot express to you how much I needed to hear what you have just said to me. I believe that I may now accept my father's death and move forward with my life. I only hope that I may truly be half the king that he was. My only wish is that he was here to see this."
"He is," his mother replied, with a glorious smile. "He is all around us and always will be."
Rhain embraced his mother once more before leaving his father's chamber and returning to his own. The prince felt a renewed sense of purpose, as if he now understood his mission in life. He would always grieve for the loss of his father, but he would now accept it and he would free himself from the responsibility of it. His mother was right; he had done all he could to protect his father. He could not possibly have known what was going to happen. King Arthur had known that his time had passed and now Rhain, too, knew it. He would still avenge his father's death, but he knew that he did it not merely out of bitterness or a need for revenge, but also out of the necessity of ensuring the peace and safety of his people. He did not like the thought of war, but it was his hope that this war would prevent the necessity of any future wars. It was his hope that the end of this war would finally bring peace and prosperity to his land. He now knew that it was his turn to be king, that it was his duty to bring about peace and prosperity for the kingdom. King Arthur was gone, but not forgotten. As long as Rhain kept his father's memory alive, as long as he strove to attain the qualities of a good king that his father had possessed in abundance, his father would live on. Not even Mordrid could do anything to destroy that.
