Note: Nothing belongs to me or Assasin9, who wrote this little masterpiece with me. There are very few people in this world who would co-write a story with me, and she is the... fourth. So, three cheers to her!
As for the Jounouchi Powers' thing... DON'T ASK.

---

Scene opened with Jou running down the street- alone. There were a few people chasing him, but they had given up, realising there was no point in their actions.
Jou realised no one was chasing him and stopped. Just as he paused to look behind him, he was ambushed by fangirls.
He then realised they were all middle aged men called Joe, all in Japanese schoolgirl uniforms and wigs.
Terrified beyond reason, he threw them off and headed for the hills, smacking into random objects and people along the way.
One of them happened to be Yugi, but as he has no part in this as of yet, the irrelevant boy got thrown aside.
Jou stopped to catch his breath and found that the schoolgirl-Joes had been following him. Hurriedly, he stuck on a fake moustache to disguise himself. Thankfully, the Joes were stupid and fell for the disguise.
He carefully snuck around a conveniently placed corner, only to bump into... Mr. Kaiba.
And Mr. Kaiba said, "Jou! Stop playing with those fan girls! We have work to do!" He grabbed Jou's wrist and started to pull him away. Glancing back, he added, "Nice moustache, by the way."
"They weren't fan girls, though! They were all called Joe-"
"Joe? Did you say JOE?!" Mr. Kaiba looked worried.
"Did I say something else?"
Mr. Kaiba glared at him, pulling him into an alley. "These men... they want endorsing for their fast food joints."
Jou's eyes widened in horror. "That's just /sick/!"
"We have to stop them before it's too late."
"I know. We can ambush them, then I can whip out some cool moves, and I'll take them all out single-handedly." He grinned.
"We'll make that plan B."
"What's plan A?"
"All that, except I do all the stuff."
Jou sulked. "How come /you/ get to do all the cool moves?"
Mr. Kaiba sighed. "Shut up and follow me."
"Don't I always do that?!"
"Yes, so stop whining."
Jou growled low in his throat, tackling Mr. Kaiba. "Let me do some of the cool stuff!"
"Fine, fine! You can do some cool moves, just get off of me!"
Cackling triumphantly, Jou leapt to his feet and raced off towards the Joes.
Mr. Kaiba got up. "Hey! Wait for me, you idiot!"
Jou didn't seem to hear him, as he body slammed the first Joe, who was holding a little Japanese flag. "DIE, JOE!" He yelled in a war cry like mode.
"Jou..." Mr. Kaiba sighed, shaking his head. "That isn't a cool move!"
Jou blinked. "It isn't?"
In the time it took to blink and ask a stupid question, two more of the Joes had tackled Jou.
"Give us endorsement!" one of them cried.
"Nevarrr!" He yelled, before one jumped over his face.
Mr. Kaiba looked around. 'Looks like I have to save his ass again...'
Within a few minutes, Mr. Kaiba's amazing martial arts skills had, once again, saved Jou's ass.
"Whew," Jou muttered. "Glad I handled that situation."
Mr. Kaiba rolled his eyes. "Yes, your astounding skills came in /so/ handy."
He grinned, getting a hand up. "Did you see how I treated that one in the tutu?"
"Yes," Mr. Kaiba said, "Your great skill of being sat on amazes me to no end."
"Yeah, I'm pretty amazing," Jou commented proudly.
"Come on, Mr. Amazing, let's get back to work."
"Wait," the blonde mused, "isn't this work?"
"Well, I mean the work we were supposed to do before we intercepted the Joes. Or, rather, before the Joes intercepted you."
"Oh..." Jou looked down, "What work was that?"
"You... you don't remember?!" He sighed, "We're supposed to meet up with Yugi. It sounded urgent when he contacted me."
"Do you think we have time to stop at a burger joint first?"
"What?!"
"Beating up bad guys makes me hungry!"
"But you didn't... oh, fine." Mr. Kaiba agreed, secretly hungry himself.
"Let's go to that one!"
"But that's a pizza joint."
"So?'
Mr. Kaiba sighed. "I should know better than to try and make sense of him by now..." He muttered to himself.
"Yeah! Pizza!" Jou cheered, dashing towards the restaurant.
About half an hour later, Jou finally finished his pizza, having eaten the whole thing except for the one piece his partner had taken.
Jou's stomach rumbled. "Gee... why'd you eat that? I was really hungry!"
"Quiet. We have to go see Yugi."
"Aww, just one more pizza!"
"No way!"
"It doesn't take me long to eat it."
"But it takes forever to cook it. Now come on!"
Mr. Kaiba grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and started dragging him along.
"You don't have to do this!"
"Yes, I do. Believe me, I do."
They finally made it to headquarters, where Yugi was waiting for them, looking quite bored. When they walked in, the short boy leapt to his feet. "Finally! What took so long?!"
"Sorry, sir," Mr. Kaiba started, "We got ambushed by the Joes and-"
"And then there was a serious pizza predicament!" Jou added 'helpfully'.
Yugi stared at him for a moment, then continued. "We have a problem?"
"We do?" Jou asked.
Mr. Kaiba elbowed him. "Yes, that's why we're here, idiot."
Out of nowhere, he said: "Do I make you horny, baby? Do I?!"
Mr. Kaiba smacked Jou. "That line comes later in the story, you moron!"
"It does?"
"Yes! When you're hitting on my son!"
There was a moment of silence.
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that." Jou said slowly, and Yugi nodded.
"Anyway, to aid you on your mission, we've gotten hold of some handy gadget... things." Yugi led them to a room filled with equipment.
"Wow!" Jou cried. "Didn't they use stuff just like this in James Bond?!"
Mr. Kaiba clamped a hand over his mouth, looking nervously at the viewers.
"Ix-nay on the amesbond-jay..." He muttered, as Jou nodded. "Now, Yugi, what do these things do?"
Yugi looked at the huge load of stuff piled up behind him. "I have no idea."
Jou and Mr. Kaiba face faulted. "You would give us equipment without knowing what it does?!"
"Sure, I do it all the time." Yugi then realised what he had just said. "Uhh, I mean..."
"Aha! You're not Yugi!" Mr. Kaiba exclaimed.
"Yes, I am. You just want my job."
Mr. Kaiba glared at him, while Yugi passed them both tubes of toothpaste. "I don't know what this does, either, but I'd suggest it'd be best if you didn't use it on your teeth."
Mr. Kaiba quickly took Jou's.
Jou pouted. "But... but... oral hygiene!"
Ignoring him, Mr. Kaiba asked, "What's the assignment, anyway?"
"We've gotten word that Dr. Bakura is running a whorehouse in downtown Domino."
Jou blinked. "And the problem with that is...?"
"Uh... because he's evil and we can't let him get a decent job no matter what!"
"Ohhh." Jou nodded.
Yugi gave them the address, as well as a few more gadgets- all of which Mr. Kaiba kept from Jou's hands. Then they were on their way. They reached the not-so-inconspicuous warehouse in which Dr. Bakura's questionable yet appreciated business was run.
"Alright, I say we break in, guns drawn, and take down Bakura the moment we see him."
Jou blinked. "Why?"
"DON'T BE DUMB!"
Jou feigned a tear.
"If you're trying to get my sympathy, you should stop now."
"But..."
"Just stay here. Don't try and pick a fight with a baby or anything."
Jou sulked as Mr. Kaiba drew his gun. He kicked in the door and shouted, "Nobody move!" The room's occupants squeaked in terror and their arms shot into the air. Just as he was about to try to find Dr. Bakura...
"Dr. Bakura! Where are you?!" came Jou's voice.
If looks could kill, Mr. Kaiba would have been given life sentence.
"Jou... what are you doing?!" He yelled, as they both watched Dr. Bakura begin to flee.
"I just wanted to help..."
"DON'T HELP."
"Well, what am I supposed to do if I can't help?!"
"Go count your toes or something!" Mr. Kaiba called, running after Dr. Bakura.
"Don't try to trick me!" Jou called, on his heels. "I already know I have twelve toes!"
He stopped as Mr. Kaiba ran ahead, not giving him a second thought.
"Maybe I should double-check on my toes..."
As Jou sat down and began to take off his shoes and socks, Mr. Kaiba pursued Dr. Bakura to what appeared to be a cryogenic chamber somewhere within the recesses of the warehouse.
"Give it up, Dr. Bakura! You're cornered!"
Dr. Bakura turned and smirked. "That's what you think." He pressed a red button and the door closed, separating he and Mr. Ryousworth (Ryou in a cat suit! XD) from Mr. Kaiba. As the cryogenic freezing kicked in, there was a loud rumbling sound. The chamber separated from the rest of the warehouse, revealing itself to be part of a giant Schoolgirl-Joe rocket.
"Damn!" Mr. Kaiba yelled. "Dr. Bakura, I'll get you!"
Dr. Bakura, obviously, didn't hear him.
"I'LL BE YOUR END!"
"No you won't!" Jou said, walking in barefoot. "Your part's almost over!"
"Oh. Damn."
They returned to headquarters, where Yugi eagerly asked them how the assignment went.
"Well, the good news," Jou started, "is that I have ten toes."
Yugi looked to Mr. Kaiba for an explanation, but the older man shook his head. "Don't ask."
"The bad news is, Dr. Bakura got away in a Schoolgirl-Joe rocket."
"... That's disturbing."
"Blame the authors."
Yugi nodded sagely. "Anyway... Jou."
"Yes?"
"As that... Schoolgirl-Joe rocket froze Dr. Bakura, we need to freeze you, too."
"What?!" Mr. Kaiba stared in shock. "Him?!"
"Yes! I finally get to do something cool!" Jou cheered.
"He's gonna screw everything up. You know that."
Yugi sighed. "Yes."
"Alright. It's on /your/ head."
While Jou was doing a full-blown football victory dance, Mr. Kaiba raised an eyebrow at Yugi.
"There's a chance of not being able to thaw him, isn't there?"
Yugi was still for a moment, then nodded. "We don't want our best agent doing something so risky."
And so Jou was hauled to the headquarters cryogenics lab and frozen for many years. Until one day, he was thawed...