Hullo everyone. this is Harvester of Sorrow by Metallica! Yay! But anyway
I'm sorry it's been forever, I've been lazy, and busy with school.
Thanks to: kimmerkay -thanks so much for the suggestions. I wrote them down and looked into the lyrics and am planning on them for future chapters! Thanks again! And ya he does need help lol! Hehe.
crazy4nc128 -hehe okie I won't answer that. Lol update u 2!
CrazeLilDreamer-hehe thanks a bunch! Keep reading!
SodapopC -lol, don't worry I laughed when writing it so it's all good! Lol thanks man!
GirlsDontCri -hehe, thanks for another great review, keep it up ;)!
And as always. I own nothing.
Pony's POV again
My Life Suffocates
Planting Seeds of Hate
I've Loved, Turned to Hate
Trapped Far Beyond My Fate
I'm so trapped. I can't get away from myself-or those voices. But Johnny, Mom and Dad, maybe even Dally, they all cared about me at one time. What happened?
"You failed them and killed them you idiot." Ah, my own voice again. I had killed Johnny and Dally. But I didn't kill mom and dad. Oh but surely somehow that was my fault too.
I Give
You Take
This Life That I Forsake
Been Cheated of My Youth
You Turned this Lie to Truth
I should be in jail, or dead. Either way I shouldn't be here free to live my life and enjoy my youth. I took life from four people; five if you count bob. Plus all the people whose lives have been affected. Darry and Soda-I've ruined their lives too.
I pull the covers over my head.
Anger
Misery
You'll Suffer unto Me
But haven't I suffered enough having to live with all this guilt?
"Ha! You don't know what suffering is kid!" Dally's voice rang loud in my head.
"You deserve everything you get and more." My hideous voice.
"You've gotten off lucky. You ruined lives and our family." Mom and dad.
"You killed your best friend Ponyboy, what do you expect. You killed me!" Oh, Johnny.
They're right.
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
Pure Black Looking Clear
My Work Is Done Soon Here
Try Getting Back to Me
Get Back Which Used to Be
I wish I could go back. I'd change everything. I'd have it so they'd all be here. I never would have even run out that night. Then none of this would have happened. I wish things could be back to how they used to be.
But things will never be the same. And it's all thanks to me. I have no choice but to leave too.
But I don't want to yet.
Drink up
Shoot in
Let the Beatings Begin
Distributor of Pain
Your Loss Becomes My Gain
Anger
Misery
You'll Suffer unto Me
I have to save the world from myself.
I bring pain and misery onto everyone. I'm a plague. I'm the devil's advocate. I'm a bad, bad person. I'm the harvester of sorrow.
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
All Have Said Their Prayers
Invade Their Nightmares
See into My Eyes
You'll Find Where Murder Lies
Infanticide
Where did I go wrong? I used to be a good person. But somewhere I turned evil.
"People don't turn evil, it's in them all along. Trust me I know. I've seen it."
"Pony, you were never a good boy."
"I can't believe this is our son. What did we do to deserve this?"
"You seemed like such a good person. Digging sunsets and all-but all along you were just a murderer deep down."
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
The Frayed Ends of Sanity
I'm losing it. I can't take this much longer. I need to escape somehow. I can feel myself rocking under the blankets. I pull the blankets tighter and tighter and tighter. I'm not sure why. But I need to do something so that's what I do. Maybe if I'm lucky enough I'll strangle myself. So I pull tighter on my neck.
Never Hunger
Never Prosper
I Have Fallen Prey to Failure
Struggle Within
Triggered Again
Now the Candle Burns at Both Ends
Twisting under Schizophrenia
Falling Deep into Dementia
If I just finish myself off already then I wouldn't have to take this anymore. No more fighting myself, the voices in my head. I'm a failure and that's that there's no fixing it now.
I have to do this. Then why am I finding it so hard to do so? Why can't I just get it over with? I don't want to die. Oh but I must. But no. I try fighting myself. But I can't. I let out a scream.
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
And I keep screaming. I can feel tears start to run down my face as I scream. I kick wildly under the blankets and squirm with all my might. But I can't stop myself. It feels more like I'm fighting some strong soc than myself.
I hear voices around me now. They must have heard me scream. Good, they'll save me.
But no one can save me from myself.
Birth of Terror
Death of Much More
I'm the Slave of Fear,my Captor
Never Warnings
Spreading its Wings
As I Wait for the Horror She Brings
Loss of Interest,question,wonder
Waves of Fear They Pull Me under
Why would they bother saving me anyway. I'm not Ponyboy anymore. I'm some sort of monster that will just bring them pain. If they were smart they'd leave me to myself and I'll eventually finish myself off.
AH. I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE.
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
I guess the managed to pull the blankets off of me. But I'm still kicking and screaming and crying. I just can't stop.
I feel Soda's reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Come on Pony wake up, it's okay." BUT I'M NOT ASLEEP! I'M STUCK IN A NIGHTMARE BUT IT'S NOT ONE YOU CAN WAKE UP FROM! DON'T YOU GET IT!
Into Run
I Am Sinking
Hostage of this Nameless Feeling
Hell Is Set Free
Flooded I'll Be
Feel the Undertow Inside Me
I guess they realize this finally. Darry's holding me down by the shoulders trying to steady me. I still squirm with all my might and kick my legs wildly.
Two-bit and Steve have my legs now. No matter how much I try I can't move. But I still scream.
Height,hell,time,haste,terror,tension
Life,death,want,waste,mass Depression
These words repeats furiously over and over again in my head. THAT'S IT I GIVE UP!
I stop moving and fighting. I stop screaming. I just give up and give into the tears. I curl myself into a ball and sob uncontrollably. I want out.
Someone's holding me. I turn to look up at Soda. I know I won't be in this mind state for very long. Soon I'll be the voices will be back and I can't fight them off much longer.
Old Habbits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Myself Is after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
I hear the voices starting to come back. I need to get rid of them. But they won't let me. I have to do something fast before they come back. Through sobs I manage to look Soda deep in the eyes and see he's holding tears back himself.
I manage to whisper. "Soda, I need help."
Sorry it was short and what not please review! I need help with plot! Hehe(
Thanks to: kimmerkay -thanks so much for the suggestions. I wrote them down and looked into the lyrics and am planning on them for future chapters! Thanks again! And ya he does need help lol! Hehe.
crazy4nc128 -hehe okie I won't answer that. Lol update u 2!
CrazeLilDreamer-hehe thanks a bunch! Keep reading!
SodapopC -lol, don't worry I laughed when writing it so it's all good! Lol thanks man!
GirlsDontCri -hehe, thanks for another great review, keep it up ;)!
And as always. I own nothing.
Pony's POV again
My Life Suffocates
Planting Seeds of Hate
I've Loved, Turned to Hate
Trapped Far Beyond My Fate
I'm so trapped. I can't get away from myself-or those voices. But Johnny, Mom and Dad, maybe even Dally, they all cared about me at one time. What happened?
"You failed them and killed them you idiot." Ah, my own voice again. I had killed Johnny and Dally. But I didn't kill mom and dad. Oh but surely somehow that was my fault too.
I Give
You Take
This Life That I Forsake
Been Cheated of My Youth
You Turned this Lie to Truth
I should be in jail, or dead. Either way I shouldn't be here free to live my life and enjoy my youth. I took life from four people; five if you count bob. Plus all the people whose lives have been affected. Darry and Soda-I've ruined their lives too.
I pull the covers over my head.
Anger
Misery
You'll Suffer unto Me
But haven't I suffered enough having to live with all this guilt?
"Ha! You don't know what suffering is kid!" Dally's voice rang loud in my head.
"You deserve everything you get and more." My hideous voice.
"You've gotten off lucky. You ruined lives and our family." Mom and dad.
"You killed your best friend Ponyboy, what do you expect. You killed me!" Oh, Johnny.
They're right.
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
Pure Black Looking Clear
My Work Is Done Soon Here
Try Getting Back to Me
Get Back Which Used to Be
I wish I could go back. I'd change everything. I'd have it so they'd all be here. I never would have even run out that night. Then none of this would have happened. I wish things could be back to how they used to be.
But things will never be the same. And it's all thanks to me. I have no choice but to leave too.
But I don't want to yet.
Drink up
Shoot in
Let the Beatings Begin
Distributor of Pain
Your Loss Becomes My Gain
Anger
Misery
You'll Suffer unto Me
I have to save the world from myself.
I bring pain and misery onto everyone. I'm a plague. I'm the devil's advocate. I'm a bad, bad person. I'm the harvester of sorrow.
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
All Have Said Their Prayers
Invade Their Nightmares
See into My Eyes
You'll Find Where Murder Lies
Infanticide
Where did I go wrong? I used to be a good person. But somewhere I turned evil.
"People don't turn evil, it's in them all along. Trust me I know. I've seen it."
"Pony, you were never a good boy."
"I can't believe this is our son. What did we do to deserve this?"
"You seemed like such a good person. Digging sunsets and all-but all along you were just a murderer deep down."
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
Language of the Mad
Harvester of Sorrow
The Frayed Ends of Sanity
I'm losing it. I can't take this much longer. I need to escape somehow. I can feel myself rocking under the blankets. I pull the blankets tighter and tighter and tighter. I'm not sure why. But I need to do something so that's what I do. Maybe if I'm lucky enough I'll strangle myself. So I pull tighter on my neck.
Never Hunger
Never Prosper
I Have Fallen Prey to Failure
Struggle Within
Triggered Again
Now the Candle Burns at Both Ends
Twisting under Schizophrenia
Falling Deep into Dementia
If I just finish myself off already then I wouldn't have to take this anymore. No more fighting myself, the voices in my head. I'm a failure and that's that there's no fixing it now.
I have to do this. Then why am I finding it so hard to do so? Why can't I just get it over with? I don't want to die. Oh but I must. But no. I try fighting myself. But I can't. I let out a scream.
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
And I keep screaming. I can feel tears start to run down my face as I scream. I kick wildly under the blankets and squirm with all my might. But I can't stop myself. It feels more like I'm fighting some strong soc than myself.
I hear voices around me now. They must have heard me scream. Good, they'll save me.
But no one can save me from myself.
Birth of Terror
Death of Much More
I'm the Slave of Fear,my Captor
Never Warnings
Spreading its Wings
As I Wait for the Horror She Brings
Loss of Interest,question,wonder
Waves of Fear They Pull Me under
Why would they bother saving me anyway. I'm not Ponyboy anymore. I'm some sort of monster that will just bring them pain. If they were smart they'd leave me to myself and I'll eventually finish myself off.
AH. I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE.
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
I guess the managed to pull the blankets off of me. But I'm still kicking and screaming and crying. I just can't stop.
I feel Soda's reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Come on Pony wake up, it's okay." BUT I'M NOT ASLEEP! I'M STUCK IN A NIGHTMARE BUT IT'S NOT ONE YOU CAN WAKE UP FROM! DON'T YOU GET IT!
Into Run
I Am Sinking
Hostage of this Nameless Feeling
Hell Is Set Free
Flooded I'll Be
Feel the Undertow Inside Me
I guess they realize this finally. Darry's holding me down by the shoulders trying to steady me. I still squirm with all my might and kick my legs wildly.
Two-bit and Steve have my legs now. No matter how much I try I can't move. But I still scream.
Height,hell,time,haste,terror,tension
Life,death,want,waste,mass Depression
These words repeats furiously over and over again in my head. THAT'S IT I GIVE UP!
I stop moving and fighting. I stop screaming. I just give up and give into the tears. I curl myself into a ball and sob uncontrollably. I want out.
Someone's holding me. I turn to look up at Soda. I know I won't be in this mind state for very long. Soon I'll be the voices will be back and I can't fight them off much longer.
Old Habbits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Myself Is after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
I hear the voices starting to come back. I need to get rid of them. But they won't let me. I have to do something fast before they come back. Through sobs I manage to look Soda deep in the eyes and see he's holding tears back himself.
I manage to whisper. "Soda, I need help."
Sorry it was short and what not please review! I need help with plot! Hehe(
