Chapter Seven: Realization
Ouch... Ouch... OUCH!! I wince and blow on the small scab on my arm. This really hurts like a bitch, I probably should stop picking at it, but... I've ALWAYS picked my scabs, ever sense I was little. Mostly because when I was little I did that to look tough, you know, so the other kids on my block would think me as a tough girl. Little did they know that I was cryin' my eyes out on the inside. As for right now, I have no intention of having anyone think I'm a tough girl, right now, I could care less. No, right now I just wanna pick at it cuz it's just a habbit and it keeps me from thinkin' about the utter embarassment I had just gotten done enduring. Well technically it was about two hours ago, but the scenes keep playing in my mind, like it just happened five seconds ago...
"SUCKER!" I yelled and lept down the ladder, albeit ungracfully, and ran like hell to the only place I could think of. The Sea Side Shack. However on my way there I was rudely hit with something--that I later found out was a "Blitz Ball"--and found myself practically knocked unconscious on the sand. Wakka, I think that's what his name is--the guy who threw the ball--I think he'll be visited by my army of coconuts tomorrow as well... ANYWAY, before I knew what was goin' on, I was conveniently tied to a near by stake and was pelted repeatedly by coconuts. I was lucky, however, the parents on the island didn't seem to want to throw any coconuts at me, they just gave me a long as all hell lecture on how little sniving children like myself always get their "come upens"--whatever the hell that means. But you know, having Courtney as my ever present watcher kinda led to a few things happenin'--me losin' all my good luck and replacing it with utter bad luck, which seems to follow me around anyway. She saw that none of the parents were throwing coconuts, so she instead had the children of the island throw as many coconuts as they had parents. So once again, I was screwed. Cut up, bruised, beaten, bumpy, swollen, and screwed. Lovely.
I groan to myself as I hear someone approach me from behind. This is just what I need, some more teasing...
"How come every time something happens to you, one of us finds you outside somewhere?"
"How come every time I come outside to be alone, one of you has to find me?" I ask back.
I hear Riku chuckle slightly before he says, "I asked you first."
I sigh, "Because I like to be outside, especially in this weather. I'm kinda like a freak for nature or somethin'."
"More like a freak OF nature." I quirk an eyebrow out at the ocean, as I continue to stare out at it, don't I have a sticker that says that...? I look over at him as he plops down in the sand next to me.
"As for us, we just worry." He says, taking his turn to reply.
Or maybe it was a shirt...? Oh hell, I can't remember.
"Worryin' makes the heart grow old." I mumble.
"Maybe, but not worrying makes the heart grow careless." He counters.
I give him my most sarcastic look as I lean forward and say, "Wow Riku! You've just described me in a nut shell! I didn't know my character was that easy to judge!"
He rolls his eyes at me. Gee, I think he's startin' to get used to me. Scary.
"But that IS you in a nut shell. And you can't deny it." Comes Courtney's voice from behind us. Damn, my pereferal hearing is getting alittle rusty, I didn't hear her comin' at ALL. "Miss "I don't care"." She adds in quickly.
"Oh and you're one to talk." I say as I watch her plop her sorry ass next to me. "You're just like me."
"Wouldn't have been "just like you" if you hadn't of rubbed off on me." She says back.
Though I'm 16 and should be way beyond the level of maturity my actions will suggest, I can't resist the urge to stick my tongue out at her and cross my eyes childishly. Take that! Haha! She too, rolls her eyes at me and I smirk. "But seriously, I care... to an extent..."
"To an extent?" Riku asks.
"Yes, to an extent." I answer. He quirks an eyebrow at me. "Like," I continue in order to prove my point, "when everyone on the island was throwing coconuts at me, I cared."
"Of course you did! You were being beaten with coconuts!" Courtney chimes in. I glare at her, then turn back to Riku.
"Ok, so that was a bad example." I pause and start contemplating the many other things that I can say as an example. And that's when it hits me... I really DON'T care. I can't think of any more instences that I actually truely cared, well other than what had just happened to Earth and all. "Well, to be honest," I say at last, "I haven't really experienced to many instences that would cause me to care. Except recent events."He nods, understanding where I was comin' from. I look back out at the ocean, that seems to be the answer for everythin' to me right now. I just... look back out at the ocean and everythin' becomes fine.
"I remember a time, it was about 2 years ago, when me and two of my friends would sit out on this beach, kinda like what we're doing now, and we'd talk about going to another world together..." I look back over at Riku as he speaks, he seems to have a glint of sadness on his expression. "When our wish came true, it seemed to me the best thing that had ever happened. There I was, travelling around inbetween worlds with no problem at all, the only thing missing were my two friends. Somehow we were seperated, and it wasn't the same without them. So, I sent out to find them, doing horrible things in the process, in order to find them..." He pauses and seems to be searching for the right things to say. "What I'm trying to say is... Even when I did those things I didn't feel like I had done anything wrong, like what I was doing was, in some way, the right thing." He looks over at me, the sun glinting in his eyes and gave them an extra shine, kinda like he was going to cry. "But when I saw how much you cared about your world, and how you became so distraught that you couldn't speak, couldn't acknowledge Courtney or myself, almost couldn't continue to live... it made me... for the first time... feel like I had done the wrong thing. It made me regret what I had done. It made me see what a fool I was, and how childish I had been." He looks back out to the ocean. "And... for what it's worth... I just wanted to say... that I'm sorry."
My eyes widen... He... he...
"Hey Riku, c'mon man. It's not your fault. How would your childhood wish have anythin' to do with our world being destroyed? Don't blame yourself, it was just a coincedence. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. That's all." Courtney says giving him a comforting grin. "Ain't that right Katie?"
I ignore her, it's not that I didn't hear her, or kind of agree with her, but... I continue to stare at Riku. How...? For the first time sense I was thrown into this horrible mess, I... I finally understand. Though everythin' was unintentional, he still... he's still... responsible. For everything. I don't know exactly how I've come to this conclusion, but... I can't help but feel that... he's responsible. I know it doesn't make any sense, there isn't any evidence that points to him being the culprit, or to him even being involved in anything! But...
I gasp.
~Now that I think about it though, strange things have been happenin' now that this guy shows up. The weather's turned quite violent, it gets darker sooner, odd material has been fallin' from the sky, and just yesterday I saw a creature in the woods while walkin' home from the bus stop. It was black and walked almost on all fours, with antennae and two bright yellow eyes. I just deemed that as part of my over-active imagination, but I could almost SWEAR I saw that damn freaky creature... However, what all of those things have to do with HIM are completely BEYOND me. He would have no way of being able to control ANY of that, but I can't help but feel that maybe... he's involved in all this SOMEHOW. Nevertheless, you won't hear me making any accusations ANY time soon.~
"Katie?" I hear Courtney say, she touches my shoulder but I don't move. I'm lost in the memories of the last day I had spent on Earth...
~THUMP!! My attention is drawn away from his face and over to the wall of the Green House, there, clinging to the wall, I could see one of those creatures that I saw in the woods, looking in on us.~
~"Heartless!" Riku sneers, and dashes for the door, nearly tripping me with the damn hose. Heartless? What the HELL is a HEARTLESS?! Suppose it's that freaky as all hell thing that's scratchin' at the wall... Hm... BRILLIANT deduction my dear DUMB ASS!~
~What I'm seein' now, is definitely NOT what I was expecting to see. Well, what EXACTLY I was expecting, I dunno, but it sure as hell wasn't THIS! Up in the sky was a giant ball of "blackness" and some small things flying up to it. Uh, it's kinda like a vaccum... WHAT?! A VACCUM?!?! All it needs is the Dirt Devil sign and we'd have a match... Great, now I'm going to get sucked up and DIE! Perfect...~
~Suddenly MY hand starts to glow yellow and there pops the dark colored key... "What in the world!" I almost drop the dumb thing. "What am I supposed to do with this?!"
"Use it!" he instructs.
"And do WHAT?! KEY them to death?!"~
~...we're both just a spinnin' right up to the big black ball thingy. Well... DAMMIT! I don't WANNA DIE!! I have so much to LIVE FOR!~
~That's when EVERYTHING turns black...~
I stand up abroptly, scaring my two friends, but I don't care. I can't believe it... I look back at Riku, confusion and hate and sadness-- all rolled up into one--plague my mind. "You..." I stutter, I'm so confused I don't know if I'll be able to say anythin', "You..." Or maybe it's because I'm too angry to speak, "You..." Or maybe because I'm too sad...? "You..." Screw it, I just won't say anythin'.
He's standin' now, and holdin' my shoulders in an attempt to calm me down. Damn, my face must be like an open book for these two. All they have to do is look at me and read my state of mind. "Don't touch me!" I yell wrenching myself from his grip. "Don't you EVER touch me again..." I snarl and take off, running as fast as my legs can carry me, to where? I'm not sure, but anywhere is good, as long as it's away from him.
Ouch... Ouch... OUCH!! I wince and blow on the small scab on my arm. This really hurts like a bitch, I probably should stop picking at it, but... I've ALWAYS picked my scabs, ever sense I was little. Mostly because when I was little I did that to look tough, you know, so the other kids on my block would think me as a tough girl. Little did they know that I was cryin' my eyes out on the inside. As for right now, I have no intention of having anyone think I'm a tough girl, right now, I could care less. No, right now I just wanna pick at it cuz it's just a habbit and it keeps me from thinkin' about the utter embarassment I had just gotten done enduring. Well technically it was about two hours ago, but the scenes keep playing in my mind, like it just happened five seconds ago...
"SUCKER!" I yelled and lept down the ladder, albeit ungracfully, and ran like hell to the only place I could think of. The Sea Side Shack. However on my way there I was rudely hit with something--that I later found out was a "Blitz Ball"--and found myself practically knocked unconscious on the sand. Wakka, I think that's what his name is--the guy who threw the ball--I think he'll be visited by my army of coconuts tomorrow as well... ANYWAY, before I knew what was goin' on, I was conveniently tied to a near by stake and was pelted repeatedly by coconuts. I was lucky, however, the parents on the island didn't seem to want to throw any coconuts at me, they just gave me a long as all hell lecture on how little sniving children like myself always get their "come upens"--whatever the hell that means. But you know, having Courtney as my ever present watcher kinda led to a few things happenin'--me losin' all my good luck and replacing it with utter bad luck, which seems to follow me around anyway. She saw that none of the parents were throwing coconuts, so she instead had the children of the island throw as many coconuts as they had parents. So once again, I was screwed. Cut up, bruised, beaten, bumpy, swollen, and screwed. Lovely.
I groan to myself as I hear someone approach me from behind. This is just what I need, some more teasing...
"How come every time something happens to you, one of us finds you outside somewhere?"
"How come every time I come outside to be alone, one of you has to find me?" I ask back.
I hear Riku chuckle slightly before he says, "I asked you first."
I sigh, "Because I like to be outside, especially in this weather. I'm kinda like a freak for nature or somethin'."
"More like a freak OF nature." I quirk an eyebrow out at the ocean, as I continue to stare out at it, don't I have a sticker that says that...? I look over at him as he plops down in the sand next to me.
"As for us, we just worry." He says, taking his turn to reply.
Or maybe it was a shirt...? Oh hell, I can't remember.
"Worryin' makes the heart grow old." I mumble.
"Maybe, but not worrying makes the heart grow careless." He counters.
I give him my most sarcastic look as I lean forward and say, "Wow Riku! You've just described me in a nut shell! I didn't know my character was that easy to judge!"
He rolls his eyes at me. Gee, I think he's startin' to get used to me. Scary.
"But that IS you in a nut shell. And you can't deny it." Comes Courtney's voice from behind us. Damn, my pereferal hearing is getting alittle rusty, I didn't hear her comin' at ALL. "Miss "I don't care"." She adds in quickly.
"Oh and you're one to talk." I say as I watch her plop her sorry ass next to me. "You're just like me."
"Wouldn't have been "just like you" if you hadn't of rubbed off on me." She says back.
Though I'm 16 and should be way beyond the level of maturity my actions will suggest, I can't resist the urge to stick my tongue out at her and cross my eyes childishly. Take that! Haha! She too, rolls her eyes at me and I smirk. "But seriously, I care... to an extent..."
"To an extent?" Riku asks.
"Yes, to an extent." I answer. He quirks an eyebrow at me. "Like," I continue in order to prove my point, "when everyone on the island was throwing coconuts at me, I cared."
"Of course you did! You were being beaten with coconuts!" Courtney chimes in. I glare at her, then turn back to Riku.
"Ok, so that was a bad example." I pause and start contemplating the many other things that I can say as an example. And that's when it hits me... I really DON'T care. I can't think of any more instences that I actually truely cared, well other than what had just happened to Earth and all. "Well, to be honest," I say at last, "I haven't really experienced to many instences that would cause me to care. Except recent events."He nods, understanding where I was comin' from. I look back out at the ocean, that seems to be the answer for everythin' to me right now. I just... look back out at the ocean and everythin' becomes fine.
"I remember a time, it was about 2 years ago, when me and two of my friends would sit out on this beach, kinda like what we're doing now, and we'd talk about going to another world together..." I look back over at Riku as he speaks, he seems to have a glint of sadness on his expression. "When our wish came true, it seemed to me the best thing that had ever happened. There I was, travelling around inbetween worlds with no problem at all, the only thing missing were my two friends. Somehow we were seperated, and it wasn't the same without them. So, I sent out to find them, doing horrible things in the process, in order to find them..." He pauses and seems to be searching for the right things to say. "What I'm trying to say is... Even when I did those things I didn't feel like I had done anything wrong, like what I was doing was, in some way, the right thing." He looks over at me, the sun glinting in his eyes and gave them an extra shine, kinda like he was going to cry. "But when I saw how much you cared about your world, and how you became so distraught that you couldn't speak, couldn't acknowledge Courtney or myself, almost couldn't continue to live... it made me... for the first time... feel like I had done the wrong thing. It made me regret what I had done. It made me see what a fool I was, and how childish I had been." He looks back out to the ocean. "And... for what it's worth... I just wanted to say... that I'm sorry."
My eyes widen... He... he...
"Hey Riku, c'mon man. It's not your fault. How would your childhood wish have anythin' to do with our world being destroyed? Don't blame yourself, it was just a coincedence. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. That's all." Courtney says giving him a comforting grin. "Ain't that right Katie?"
I ignore her, it's not that I didn't hear her, or kind of agree with her, but... I continue to stare at Riku. How...? For the first time sense I was thrown into this horrible mess, I... I finally understand. Though everythin' was unintentional, he still... he's still... responsible. For everything. I don't know exactly how I've come to this conclusion, but... I can't help but feel that... he's responsible. I know it doesn't make any sense, there isn't any evidence that points to him being the culprit, or to him even being involved in anything! But...
I gasp.
~Now that I think about it though, strange things have been happenin' now that this guy shows up. The weather's turned quite violent, it gets darker sooner, odd material has been fallin' from the sky, and just yesterday I saw a creature in the woods while walkin' home from the bus stop. It was black and walked almost on all fours, with antennae and two bright yellow eyes. I just deemed that as part of my over-active imagination, but I could almost SWEAR I saw that damn freaky creature... However, what all of those things have to do with HIM are completely BEYOND me. He would have no way of being able to control ANY of that, but I can't help but feel that maybe... he's involved in all this SOMEHOW. Nevertheless, you won't hear me making any accusations ANY time soon.~
"Katie?" I hear Courtney say, she touches my shoulder but I don't move. I'm lost in the memories of the last day I had spent on Earth...
~THUMP!! My attention is drawn away from his face and over to the wall of the Green House, there, clinging to the wall, I could see one of those creatures that I saw in the woods, looking in on us.~
~"Heartless!" Riku sneers, and dashes for the door, nearly tripping me with the damn hose. Heartless? What the HELL is a HEARTLESS?! Suppose it's that freaky as all hell thing that's scratchin' at the wall... Hm... BRILLIANT deduction my dear DUMB ASS!~
~What I'm seein' now, is definitely NOT what I was expecting to see. Well, what EXACTLY I was expecting, I dunno, but it sure as hell wasn't THIS! Up in the sky was a giant ball of "blackness" and some small things flying up to it. Uh, it's kinda like a vaccum... WHAT?! A VACCUM?!?! All it needs is the Dirt Devil sign and we'd have a match... Great, now I'm going to get sucked up and DIE! Perfect...~
~Suddenly MY hand starts to glow yellow and there pops the dark colored key... "What in the world!" I almost drop the dumb thing. "What am I supposed to do with this?!"
"Use it!" he instructs.
"And do WHAT?! KEY them to death?!"~
~...we're both just a spinnin' right up to the big black ball thingy. Well... DAMMIT! I don't WANNA DIE!! I have so much to LIVE FOR!~
~That's when EVERYTHING turns black...~
I stand up abroptly, scaring my two friends, but I don't care. I can't believe it... I look back at Riku, confusion and hate and sadness-- all rolled up into one--plague my mind. "You..." I stutter, I'm so confused I don't know if I'll be able to say anythin', "You..." Or maybe it's because I'm too angry to speak, "You..." Or maybe because I'm too sad...? "You..." Screw it, I just won't say anythin'.
He's standin' now, and holdin' my shoulders in an attempt to calm me down. Damn, my face must be like an open book for these two. All they have to do is look at me and read my state of mind. "Don't touch me!" I yell wrenching myself from his grip. "Don't you EVER touch me again..." I snarl and take off, running as fast as my legs can carry me, to where? I'm not sure, but anywhere is good, as long as it's away from him.
