Okay,
Disclaimers: I don't own any of the Gboys... darn!
Warnings:
Shounen-ai
Heero x Duo, Implied Quatre x Trowa
Meet me half
way
1Neverending
Nightmares are the Worst
I was getting mad. Heero should have been here an hour ago!
"Argh!" Slamming my fist into the table, I gasped- Damn it that hurt! "Who does he think he is?" I started pacing the room. "You can't just leave your friends hanging and think you'll get away with it, can you?" My voice must have been louder than I meant it to be because Quatre nearly jumped out of his seat. I swear I was counting! 1...2...3...-10! Who says that works anyway?
"I don't know, Duo... maybe he's in traffic...?"
"Traffic! Traffic? Who's heard of traffic at nine o'clock on a freakin' Wednesday?" Crossing my arms over my chest, I let out a harsh sigh as I plopped down on the couch, working up a good glare. "If he didn't want to come then he should've said so!"
Okay, I admit it! I was worried stiff! What if someone had stolen him? Mind you, they give him back quick enough- but just think of their doctor bills! Or what if he had run away with Relena? Oh, now that was a nightmare! Just the thought of it made me ill, and I was suddenly very upset at myself for eating such a large lunch -- that bathroom seemed so far away. I bet Quatre's mad at me for messing up his couch! I could write essays on how much I dislike Relena Peacecraft but I'm not sure anyone would read it. I suppose they already know how much I hate her.
"I agree with you, Du-"
Final Fantasy music suddenly started blaring, and I jumped up, grabbing at the phone. The noise it made early was so annoying , so I just made it easier on the ears!
"Hello-Heero?" I blurted into the receiver. Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei crowded around me, not that they couldn't have heard me on the other side of the room.
"Hello? Is this Duo Maxwell?" The woman's voice asked. And from her speech I thought they could hear her across the room too.
"If you're trying to sell me something- then I don't want it!" I was about to hang up on her, people like that are soooo annoying! Besides I was so nervous I couldn't talk to someone like her. Heero could be calling any minute! If I was on the phone with this stupid tele-marketer that I'd miss his call!
"Wait, sir! I'm not selling anything- this about Heero Yuy-"
I froze; I couldn't have put the phone down if my life depended on it. It was as if someone had surgically attached it.
"You're his wife, are you not?" The voice was tense, as if almost sad, but she spoke clearly.
I pause totally unprepared for that question, and, if she hadn't sounded so serious, I would have been rolling on the ground with laughter.
"No," I spoke slowly, but then puffed my chest out as I added, "But I'm his best friend! He was supposed to be here an hour ago- actually an hour and five minutes ago to be exact. We were gonna see this movie- forgot who was in it- Hey, you're not one of Relena's friend are you?"
"Mrs. Maxwell- Please, I have something important to tell you- please don't hang up."
"Now why would I do that?" I laughed nervously; sometimes people were so weird! "And like I said before, it's mister!"
"Mrs. Maxwell, Mr. Yuy's at the hospital. He's been... accident... Badly.. hurt. uncon-"
I couldn't hear the rest of her words. I knew she was talking- that I should have paid attention, but I couldn't get past the first sentence and the rest of the words ran through me like a bad dream. As if in slow motion, I let the receiver drop from my ear to my shoulder, somehow falling back into the cradle.
"What- What is it Duo?"
"Duo?"
I think I tried to answer the question, but my mouth was so dry -- wouldn't work. Heero's in the hospital? What happened? Was he . I swallowed hard.
I don't know how I got there, don't remember anything at all, except seeing him. He's the only thing I saw -- the only thing I saw. The world could have been in total chaos- I'd never have known. I think, though, I think my hair was wet- must have been raining outside. I think I lost the hair tie to my braid- don't remember- only him- only him.
No longer in his normal tank top and spandex shorts, he lay so vulnerable on the hospital bed. His dark hair plastered to his pale skin with blood. Part of his hair, near the back of his head, was shaved away to reveal a neatly stitched gash that was quickly bruising. His eyes, oh god, his beautiful eyes -- one swollen shut, the other shut naturally -- dark eyelashes accented against the ghostly white skin. both somehow they portraying the up-most anguish, the up-most pain. His lips tugging down slightly into a frown.
All the time I had only studied his face, walking slowly towards him. Upon reaching his side I slowly ran my fingers down his arm to another gash that went from just above his elbow to his wrist. This too was stitched up with black thread in tiny crisscrosses. I shivered and wrapped myself in a hug. There was a lump so thick in my throat that I could hardly swallow. Unwanted tears welled up in my eyes, suddenly, and for the first time I realized- I realized that... I love him. My lip trembled and I felt stupid and helpless. Why did everyone have to leave me! First Solo, then Father Maxwell and Sister Helen, now Heero? No! What did I ever do to you, God? Please, please, just don't take him- don't let him go. Please just let me wake up from this - nightmare. My eyes- I could barely see from all the tears. Pinching, pinching! - That'll wake me up! Yeah- pinching.
However stupid and unrealistic my plan was, my emotions refused to listen to my brain, and soon I was attacking my arms, my hair unraveled from its braid- veiled my face and tears from the world.
There was a sudden soft touch on my shoulder and I turned around so quickly I nearly fell over.
Quatre gave me a tiny smile and then engulfed me in a hug. I froze; no one ever gave me hugs, save Sister Helen. Good God, I must admit, I never thought Quatre could engulf anyone, he's so small!
He smoothed my hair down and whispered, in such a soothing voice, that I felt like he was trying to calm a frightened stallion twice his size.
"Shhh, it's gonna be okay, Duo. This is Heero we're talking about- remember how you told us he set his own leg?."
I shivered at that thought. Man, that had been so disgusting, well maybe disgusting is not the word- but, sheesh, it made me physically ill just thinking about it. But secretly I hope Q-man was right.
"He needs all the positive-ness we can give him, okay? He wouldn't want to see you crying and trying to pinch your arm off, now would he?"
"No," I whispered back; no, he'd call me a weakling- like Wufei does and drop my friendship. I sniffled. "No you're right Q."
He gave me a tight squeeze before pulling back.
Thanks, Quatre, you'll never know how much I needed that.
I turned back to Heero and pushed a few strands of matted hair away from his face.
"Yes, that's correct." The voice was sharp and crisp as if the person was annoyed.
I looked up and realized suddenly there was a doctor in the room. He wore a white coat and had thick glasses. His nose was so pointy I was afraid he could poke someone's eye out with it. He was so comical, trying to be so serious. Though he seemed to be in a hurry- tired of playing "twenty questions" with Wufei.
How long had he been there, talking to Wufei?
He continued, his crisp voice cutting like a knife through the sudden silence in the room. "The likely hood that he'll make it is incredibly slim. Seventy-eight percent of the people with such an injury don't make it though the first night."
"Well that's good, Heero has a twenty-tw-" Quatre smiled up a Trowa, while rubbing soothing circles against my back. Quatre was so nice, but sometimes.
"The other twenty- two percent," The doctor cut the Arabian boy off with an icy glare. It reminded me of Heero's,though his is much better tough! My bottom lip started to tremble again as I glance over at the fallen angel. "- would be better off dead because they are mentally scarred- for life."
Listening to the words I felt- Oh, hell, I felt so helpless. There was nothing I could do! Not only was Heero in a coma, but this stupid doctor had just ripped out my heart with his bare words and proceeded to stomp out all it's hope. Who said we wanted to know the chances anyway?
I dug my fingernails into my palm, because it was my fault Heero was here. If I hadn't asked him to come then -- If I had been in his place instead. Maybe if I caused myself enough pain, for all the pain Heero's going through now, then maybe, just maybe, he'd wake up.
I shook my head; I was being crazy. I sighed.
"It's not your fault, Duo," Quatre whispered.
My head shot up. Holy cow! What was that boy on- how had he known that I was thinking that? My thought were interrupted by someone who was royally pissed off - whadda ya know - Wufei.
"Have you no shame?" The Chinese boy stomped him foot- eyes blazing- at the doctor. "You talk as though it were written in stone! This isn't a weakling! This is Heero Yuy! And he will live!" Wufei screamed, his black ponytail lashing back and forth. "He will have justice!"
"This isn't a matter of the just and the unjust. This is-"
"GET OUT!" Though the order was growled, the words echoed in the room.
The doctor looked silently dumbfounded, before glaring at Wufei and walking out the door.
"Maxwell," Wufei stalked over to me, stopping just inches away. "Wake him up- that's you mission. Talk to him, onna! You're good at that, about the only thing you're good at. He likes you better than he likes the rest of us."
"That's not true." I mumbled.
"Humph. He hasn't killed you yet with all your babbling. I'd say he does like you. Give Yuy his justice, Maxwell." With that Wufei turned on his heal and left me blinking at his back.
Thanks, Wu-man.
Quatre gave Trowa a questioning glance and the silent boy nodded in response.
"Duo, we have to go - we got a mission a few hours ago - Sorry, but we have to leave you. Are you gonna be okay?"
My smile vaguely; I nodded and added in my jester voice, "Of course," not.
Yeah; 'cause I run, I hide, but I don't tell lies.
Quatre, giving me a sad smile, and Trowa, wishing me good luck with those haunting eyes - they were gone.
I turned to my more-than-usual silent partner, drawing up a chair close to the hospital bed. No noise at from him save his slow breathing and, maybe, if I had my head pressed against his chest, the faintest sound of a heart beating. Hey, at least there wasn't any clicking of those stupid keys on that laptop. We've gotta think of the good things! Yeah, the damn glass was half full, not half-empty! But, still, would that be enough?
I let out my breath that I hadn't realized I'd been holding in. My hands crept up to the side of the bed without me even realizing. I let my fingers play along the creases of the hastily place sheets, before they came to a crashing halt against Heero's hand. Slowly I picked it up, turning it gently so that he's palm faced upward. I studied each line- each story- that was written across it before I pressed my cheek against it.
God, it was so cold. Wait- as long as I'm talking to God- Why? Why did this happen to us -- to him? Haven't we seen enough dying? Hasn't he gone through enough? Haven't I lost enough people close to me? I tried to stop the tears by clenching my eyes shut, locking my jaw, but a few leaked out falling into Heero's palm. Please, just don't take him.
That's when I remembered what Wufei said- to talk to him. Hell, I hadn't said more than a few words since the phone call. I shook my head and vowed that when this was all over, I would go home and burn all the phones in the world. Then, upon realizing that wouldn't solve the problem I decided to replace the word "phones" with "cars." No that wouldn't work either. Defeated I let out another sigh.
"Well, Hee-chan, how ya doin'? You're not treating to kill me cause I called you "chan," well thanks! I really appreciate that."
No answer, of course.
"That great!? Well, I must say, I'm not doing that well."
I paused for a second, feeling a lump rise in my throat- stupid feelings!! Who asked for them anyway!?
"So how are you and Relena?"
Silence.
"She asked you to marry her!? Wow- pretty straightforward for a lady! I would have thought her the type to want you to ask her. Hey, ya know she hasn't come to see you-"
An unwanted tear escaped, trickling down my check before I violently pushed it away. Stupid fugitive.
"I came-"
I thought I heard crickets chirping.
"Heero- I know you like her and all but I just. You're gonna think me sick -- I didn't meant for it to happen. If I could, I'd make it go away. But, but I didn't even know 'til today. I'm just afraid I might not get to tell you, and I'd hate myself if I didn't get to... I never even realized -- never even thought about it. I haven't ever thought like this before- but when this happened, and, well, I know you'd rather be with Relena- Queen of the world- than an orphan- from L2- but Wufei, he told me to talk, and Quatre was- Trowa, he- Heero- I love you!"
I clutched his hand in mine and buried my face against his chest- balling my eyes out.
"Maxwell? Are you awake?"
I mumbled something and buried my head in my pillow.
"Maxwell! Get up- onna! You don't want to tear the stitches open, do you?!"
Grumbling, I pulled myself up. My hair falling in my eyes. Sheesh, my back was killing me; I wonder why? Finally brushing back my hair I nearly stopped breathing. I was holding Heero's hand- and - and.
"Maxwell!"
" Wu-man!? How are you doing?" I jumped around, looking up at him. "Have you been here long?"
Oddly his hair wasn't in its usual tight ponytail. Over his shoulder he had a rather large bag. Stifling a yawn I raised an eyebrow.
"Winner packed a few of your things and Yuy's, so we'll have someone with him at all times. I'll take over both of your missions."
"So it's not a dream," I sighed, looking over at Heero then back to Wufei. "Thanks, Wufei, thanks a lot. Sorry to dump all these missions on you, but thanks for letting me stay. I bet you'll be tired- I mean working both your missions and ours- I owe you one." I gave a weak imitation of my manic grin.
"No, Maxwell, your mission will be far more strenuous than Quatre, Trowa, or myself will take on in the next few weeks." He paused, a weird expression coming over his face. "I found this in your room. Thought it might make this hospital room look more like your other room." He handed over the thin gray item- Heero's laptop..
Okay, before you get any ideas the safe-house, we had been staying in recently only had two bedrooms- each with two twin beds in them. So I had been rooming with at redirect-bak-20050612 line 137. ero- as usual.
"Thank-you."
He nodded then left and again I was left blinking at his back. I knew Quatre hadn't packed the bag- he and Trowa had already left for that mission.
"Thanks- Wufei."
I looked down at my lap- where Heero's "love" sat. Then I glanced at the Perfect Soldier before letting out a heavy sigh. He hadn't even moved at all.
"Guess we'd better unpack, eh, Hee-chan?"
My bottom lip trembled dangerously as I clenched my jaw. I threw the stupid computer in the chair, as I stood up. It flew open-
"Why- why can't you glare at me? Yell you stupid little 'Omae o korosu' phrase? Please- anything- anything but this total silence- total nothing. I can't- I can't do this- I can't- not- not without you. Oh, god, I'm turning into a love-sick puppy!" I wailed, finally noticing that something had fallen from the open laptop.
I bent down to pick it up.
"What the-?"
It was a book- one of those blank kinds that you write in. It couldn't be Heero's; he only typed- so whose?
I let it fall open to any page. I admit it! Curiosity killed this cat.
October 4th
That girl was here today. I swear- I wish I could pull that trigger on her- She's so annoying- worse than Duo. That's not fair to Duo I guess. She always seems to show up when I'm out with him. You know only dogs can understand her, when she starts wailing about weddings and how we were meant to be together. All it does for me is give me a massive headache. She makes me sick! No matter what I do, she continues to follow me around. You'd think a person would get the point after having a gun pointed at them. Enough of her- she's of no importance.
I
returned from a mission today with Duo; it was successful. He was mad
at me for
trying to self-destruct. I wonder if he really
cares.
He asked if I wanted to go to a movie. I hate movies- they're a waste of time. Or for people who want to escape reality. But if Duo's going, I don't think I'd- he kept going on about it how it would be-
It was the end of the page- I couldn't turn it. What would it say? That I was a stupid for wanting to go to the movie? That I was annoying? That he couldn't stand me. Of course it was true, but I couldn't handle it if he said it. Because however hard I tried to tell myself that I didn't like him -- didn't care what he said about me, that he was a guy and I was a guy and that this was - this was wrong. I couldn't bring myself to move away -- to walk out that door.
TBC
I just did some editting; it was in drastic need. Hope it flows better.
