Buffy,
Hi. How's it going? Xander wrote you a letter and I thought maybe this
would help me not feel so bad inside anymore, so I'm going to try it too.
Things are bad since you've gone. No one really talks anymore, not that we
ever had anything that important to say anyway. Giles is still British.
Willow's still gay. The world didn't end, by the way, did I mention that? I
don't know what's going on inside me. Sometimes I think about that night
and I get all tight in my chest and I've looked. there's nothing wrong with
me. I was scared, really scared. Dawn says that you weren't. I got smashed
with bricks though, and you jumped into a portal, so maybe that's why. Mine
hurt more. I'm sorry you're gone. It's different than it was with your mom.
It hurts more. It hurts because it hurts so many people. Xander isn't my
Xander anymore. He's mopey and distant and even though I don't think he
means to be, I don't like this. It's going to happen to me someday and I
can't stop it. I wish you could tell me what it's like, where you are now.
Maybe then I wouldn't be so scared. And it probably will be okay if Xander
can go with me. I know that you and I weren't close, but I'm sorry you're
gone. I'm still getting the hang of this whole mortal thing. Death is
something that I've seen a lot of, I caused a lot of it, but I've never had
someone close to me go. And now there's been just tow in just a few months.
Bye!
--Anya
Bye!
--Anya
