SLACKERS
EPISODE XXII
SAKURA
I just got back to the building after picking Misty up from the airport. She's been at Cerulean for the last month, visiting her sisters. I never thought I'd see the day she would voluntarily fly out there just to see them. She hated them for such a long time, and I'm glad to see things are finally getting patched up. I think, as she's gotten older, she's realizing they're all she really has as far as family goes. She's the youngest of four girls, the older three being triplets, and her parents bailed on them to seek fame and glory in the great wide world of Pokémon adventuring. I get how one can long for the exhilaration that comes with it, being a former trainer myself, but not at the cost of compromising your family. The older three struck out on their own as performers, taking their frustrations out on her, and she couldn't take it, so she ran away for a long time. But they're family, and even though family's up to the stars, in addition to being just plain weird, that's the way it is. She's been through a lot lately, and she's been taking solace in her visits.
We've all been through a lot, really.
It's March 2024, seven months since the last time we've had an adventure. Feels like years, oddly enough. Christmas and New Year's were fairly uneventful, but still nice. Mis, Mew, Mika and I went to Hyrule to celebrate with Emily... excuse me, Princess Zelda... and Link. They've been going steady since August, as have Mew and Celebi. I'm really happy they've all been able to find each other. Mew has been so happy now that Celebi is his girlfriend. He spoils her and treats her like a princess, and they take all sorts of trips together that only Legendary Pokémon can. Although that trip they tried to make when they went back in time to see the Big Bang went rather poorly. Mew ended up sneezing and causing all of creation to be undone. He tried undoing his mistake, and it turns out the Big Bang was the result of Mew passing gas as a result of some burritos they'd had for lunch that day. You heard it from me, folks. Freebirds World Burrito is responsible for the universe and all that inhabit it.
I've taken to journaling since it's something to keep me occupied. I've been trying really hard to avoid any major events, considering how the last ones have gone. When you take down a giant brain monster, stop a transdimensional cat invasion, blow up Egg Carriers, become a supervillain, learn your dad's the boss of Team Rocket, meet God, blow up pyramid corporations, become an insult-swordfighting pirate, learn you were adopted by royalty, and watch your little sister become the new princess of Hyrule, it starts to wear on you. Misty and the guys have told me I've become more irritable lately, too. I don't know. Maybe I'm just tired. Sometimes I wonder if I'm jealous because people like Mew and Emily are finding new and exciting sources of happiness. I love Misty to death, but 19 years is a long time to be with someone. I hate the thought of anything feeling stale. The problem is I haven't found a way to make us feel fresh and exciting. I guess I know what I need to work on now.
I know last year I fucked up and almost lost her, and I've been making a conscious effort to prioritize what we have in order to avoid making the same mistake ever again. Mew and Mika have been wonderful help, as has my mom. My real mom, that is. Amanda is such an amazing person, and she adores Misty. If only I could make Giovanni realize what he has and establish something with him, too. But I know I'll always have my little Kasumi. She's been at my side despite all the shit I've put the both of us through. Right now, I'm sitting here typing on my laptop, and she's in the other chair playing a video game. Maybe I just need to put this thing down and make a move. Something spontaneous. Something romantic. I'll give it a try and update later. -M
The bar, after hours...
A few hours after writing in his journal (okay, typing, calm down), Mike takes a deep breath. He's standing in the elevator, fully focusing on the feeling of the electronic box descending to the ground below. It's one thing he's been practicing to work on being calm and not getting so irritable: being totally conscious of his surroundings. He pauses to figure out the elevator chime is a B5 note. The low hum of the machinery powering the elevator is like a white noise machine, and the descent makes him feel a bit lighter, because gravity is weird.
Another B5 chime echoes through his ears, followed by the gentle swoosh of the doors opening. Which is, in turn, followed by some abrasive conversation coming from his three best friends.
Wario: It's about time! We were supposed to start poker half an hour ago!
Mew: What kept you?
Mike can now feel his pulse getting stronger and a little faster.
Mike: Sorry, I was held up.
Wario: By what? A bathroom date with lefty?
Mew: Huh?
Knuckles: It's a masturbation joke, Mew.
Mew slaps his forehead.
Mew: Wow.
Knuckles: I know, it's tacky, right?
Mew: No, I just can't believe I didn't get it!
Knuckles: *groan*
Mike can feel a tightness in his face: the left corner of his lips rising into his cheek, folding part of it back just a little. The others recognize it as his seldom-seen smile. He then feels the urge to loosen the muscles in his arms and back. Reaching behind his neck, his hands clasp together and ascend, pulling his body straight in a long, endorphin-inducing stretch. Often mistaken for cockiness, the others inquire.
Wario: Nothing to add?
Mike: Nah, you could say I definitely didn't need lefty today.
Wario: So you're finally becoming a eunuch? We no longer have to worry about little Mikes running around in this world?!
Mike: Nope, quite the opposite. I just picked up Misty. Had a great time!
Knuckles: TMI.
Mew: We're really taking a new direction if Knux is using acronyms...
Wario: Damn. So much for getting rid of my anxiety.
Knuckles: What the hell do you have to be anxious about? Besides Taco Bell going out of business, I mean.
Wario: No longer applies! I will never set foot in one of those again, not after Mew introduced me to the glorious incarnation of heaven known as Freebirds!
Mew: Hell yeah!
Knuckles: *to camera* Hope you're enjoying your free product placement.
Mike: Seriously guys, it was mind-blowing. She and I have never had a night like tonight... I even got her to wear-
Mew: Stop. We aren't horny teenagers. We don't wanna know.
Mike: I'd have thought for sure you wouldn't be bothered anymore now that you've got yourself a girlfriend, Mew! That, and it's weird to hear you say that because up until then, you were the horniest bastard on the planet.
Mew: Things change! *smiles*
Wario: That makes all of us but you, Knux. Still can't get a date, eh?
Knuckles: Ask me again when you're with someone who won't do anything for a quarter.
Wario: Grrr...
Mike: Haven't we already used that line? Aren't we more original than that?
Knuckles: You must have us confused with people who strive for creativity.
Mike: Well, Wario's parents created an appropriate butt end for all our jokes, doesn't that count for something?
Mew: A pretty huge butt end, at that.
Wario: Will you guys please stop talking about my ass?
Mike: What? Someone had to address the elephant in the room.
An elephant charges into the bar and smacks Mike down with its trunk.
Mike: Ow... what the heck?
Elephant: Stop using toxic humor that's offensive to elephants!
Mew: But people use that one all the time...
Elephant: Yeah, and they aren't compared to Wario's ass. I don't care what your reputation is, that was uncalled for!
The elephant leaves in a husk... er, huff.
Mew: You ever think the silliness is just getting extreme because it's about to be followed by some serious melodrama?
Mike: As long as I don't get stampeded again...
A group of wild wildebeests barges through the front door and tramples Mike before exiting out the back alley door. He slowly gets up, his head surrounded by floating pigeons and stars.
Mike: Is that you, God...?
He collapses.
Mew: I think the laws of physics are broken again.
Knuckles: Lovely.
Mew: Hang on...
Mew spins in a circle and everything flashes white for a brief moment. The guys find themselves at their usual poker table, taking their usual seats, about to drink their usual drinks. No one but Mew remembers anything before the arrival of the mystery elephant in the room.
*Elephant stampedes the author*
Ouch... had that coming...
Mike: So are we gonna play poker, or not?
Mew: Only if I can finally get my dealing privileges reinstated!
Mike: And risk you using your powers to stack the deck again? No.
Mew: Aw...
16 hours later...
It's business as usual at the little New Donk dive known as Slackers. The bar's owners, Mike and Wario, are happily (by their standards) serving thirsty customers and cleaning dirty glasses. Wario holds one up to his eye like a monocle and looks at Mike.
Wario: Hey, you look a lot less ugly this way!
Mike smirks, picks up another glass, and does the same thing.
Mike: Whoa! You look like you've lost a few hundred pounds! It's like you made it back down to 400!
Wario: And your beard looks like it wasn't grown by an 11-year-old desperate to get laid!
Mike: Wait, hang on...
Mike puts down the small glass and picks up a one-liter glass pitcher, holding it back up to his eye.
Mike: There you go! Now you're starting to look normal!
Wario sets his glass down and shoves the big glass in Mike's face, not hard enough to seriously injure him, but enough for him to get really annoyed, and have kind of a sore face.
Mike: Dammit War!
Wario: Hehe!
Looking on from just outside the front door is the bar's bouncer, Wolf O'Donnell, leader of the Star Wolf mercenary team. He got his job after successfully keeping Slackers cat-free during the cat invasion some time ago. He rolls his eyes, noting that since Mike and Wario have been buddies since first grade, they still bring out the stupid boys they were back in the day. It tends to only happen when none of their friends are around, though. Wolf sighs and takes a seat in the folding chair he brought from home (after Wario told him there'd be no way in hell Slackers would buy him one).
Girl: Excuse me...
Wolf, thinking this is a passerby talking to another passerby, keeps his eyes glued on his magazine. We can't get too good of a look, but by the cover, it'd be safe to guess that it was pornography tailor-made to his... um, species.
Girl: Excuse me...
Wolf groans as he looks up with minimal effort, and immediately freaks out when he sees it's a young girl standing in front of him, looking like she can't be much older than puberty allows. He swiftly tucks the magazine under his chair so as not to alarm her. For all his misdeeds and shortcomings, it's clear decency hasn't completely escaped Wolf's character.
Wolf: Uh... yeah? You talking to me?
Girl: *nodding* Mhm.
Wolf: Aren't you a little young to be hanging out around here?
Girl: I know, but I was wondering if you could help me find someone.
Wolf: Do I look like a detective or something to you?
Girl: No, not even a little.
Wolf: Then what do you want?
Girl: I'm looking for Mihalis, I think he works here. I wanted to talk to him.
Wolf: How old are you, exactly?
Girl: 13.
Wolf: Hah! For a moment I was wondering if you were one of those people who look way older than they are, trying to sneak in, but if you're not even gonna try, I'm not gonna play along. Get lost, kid. You can come back when you grow up.
Girl: I thought for sure I'd be grown up enough to go inside for at least a minute if you're too immature to outgrow dirty magazines.
Wolf: And I thought for sure I told you to scram! If anyone saw me talking to you, they'd call the cops, and I can't have that!
Girl: Then let me see your boss and I'll get out of your hair. Excuse me, fur.
Wolf: Not a chance. Now beat it!
The girl's face looks like a pout not too unlike a certain Pokémon with an affinity for potent lullabies. She harrumphs as she turns around and stomps away angrily. Wolf groans in exasperation before getting back to his magazine.
And immediately, his boss steps outside.
Mike: Dammit Wolf, pay attention!
Wolf: Huh? Whoops, sorry boss!
He tosses away the magazine, again.
Mike: If we could get paid to do that, we'd all be gazillionaries.
Wolf: Mike, it's dead out here today! It's not even sunset, no one is coming by anytime soon. Cut me some slack!
Mike: It didn't look dead a minute ago. Want to tell me what that was all about?
Wolf: Huh? Oh, some kid came up trying to get into the bar. She didn't even pretend to be old enough.
Mike: Then what was the deal?
Wolf: She said she wanted to see you, and I shooed her off.
Mike groans.
Mike: And suddenly, I'm not mad at you anymore. Thanks for handling of that. I really don't care for kids.
Wolf: What's the matter, you don't want a mini-me running around causing mischief and inspiring the world to put padding on every sharp corner?
Mike: Ha ha. I'll have kids the day you get neutered on your own free will.
Wolf: That against it, huh?
Mike: I'll be back in a minute. I gotta pick up a pack from the store.
Wolf: I thought you were vaping now?
Mike: Working on it. It's a process.
Wolf: Addict.
Mike: Horn dog.
Mike turns away and begins his walk to the nearby convenience store. It's only a couple of blocks away, but for some reason, the walk feels like a chore. He sighs as he waits for the traffic signal to turn green, and for the little white walking dude to appear in that box that tells you when you can walk across the street. When it finally happens, he looks at the ground as he makes his way across. He doesn't remember to look up as he steps up onto the next sidewalk, and bumps into a pissed-off stranger.
Stranger: Hey, why don't you watch where you're going, you dumbass!
The stranger gives Mike the finger as he begins to turn away.
Mike: Well, double-dumbass on you!
He quickly turns back around to angrily face the Shatner wannabe.
Stranger: Oh, you did NOT...
Mike: What, are you deaf? You heard me, dipstick!
Stranger: I'll teach you!
The stranger swings at Mike, whom narrowly misses with a duck. Mike decks the guy upside the head, pissing him off further. They begin beating the crap out of each other on the sidewalk, until another stranger runs up shouting.
Girl: Stop! STOP!
She gets between them, clenches her fists angrily, and stares daggers at the stranger.
Girl: You'd better leave him alone if you know what's good for you, you big bully!
Both grown men, blood slightly spattered on their faces, look confused. One of them has no idea who this random girl is, or why she's defending him. The other one simply laughs at her.
Stranger: You think you're a tough girl, huh? Whatever. You punks aren't worth my time.
He finally turns around and starts walking away. Mike dusts himself off, looking at the random girl with an eyebrow raised.
Mike: What the hell was that for?
Girl: Huh?
She looks at Mike and gasps at his bruised, dirty face. It's not enough to warrant a hospital trip, but she is still concerned. Way more than any stranger ought to be.
Mike: You had no business getting involved in that. You could've gotten hurt, or killed!
Girl: What are you getting mad at me for? I just saved you!
Mike: I appreciate that, and I'm sure your heart's in the right place, but... I don't even know you! That was a really reckless and stupid thing to do. You should go home to your parents, they're probably worried about you.
The girl looks unusually hurt. She looks at him with pain and disbelief, then her head sinks as she can't help but stare at the ground. Mike sighs.
Mike: Look, I need to get going. Thanks for helping me, but please be more careful. Get home safe, kid. Alright?
He turns to talk away, leaving her standing there, motionless. She stomps off again, frustrated at the outcome of the situation.
11pm that night...
Having been beaten to a pulp, then healed physically by his Mew, then healed mentally (well, according to him) by a night of drinking at his favorite bar, the Drunken Goomba, Mike is walking through the city park alone. He's opted to take a shortcut through the dimly-lit cesspool of crime, only because he's not sober enough to actually care that he's taking a shortcut through a dimly-lit cesspool of crime. He stops for a second to scratch his neck, thinking he might've been bitten by a mosquito (he wasn't), then continues along a concrete pathway that he barely remembers will lead him home.
Then he hears rustling in the bushes nearby, and remembers what happened the last time he heard such a noise in this park. He readies himself into a defensive combat stance.
Mike: Alright Mare, come on out! You ain't gonna kill me this time!
Girl: Huh?
Emerging from the bushes, looking worried and confused, is the same girl whom tried to get into the bar and save Mike from being roughed up on the street earlier today. He flaps his arms, rolls his eyes, and groans.
Mike: You again?
It's clear he's been boozing quite a bit based on his answers.
Girl: Are you insane? Walking alone, drunk, through here? At night? Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?
Mike: Yeah yeah, I've heard it before...
Girl: If I hadn't followed you from that Drunken Goomba place, who knows what might've happened to you here!
Mike: Sheesh, will you lighten up? And why are you still following me?
Girl: Someone has to make sure you're being safe!
Mike: Who asked you? I know what I'm doing. YOU'RE the kid, not me, so quit telling me what to do, and for god's sake, stop following me!
The girl's face begins to redden and swell, and her eyes sparkle with what look like tears beginning to form.
Girl: Because you're important to me! You're in danger, and I don't want anything to happen to you!
Mike: *groans* Like I said, you don't even know me! I don't know why you're so obsessed with stalking me, but I've had enough.
The girl's tears begin streaming down her face, her breathing intensifies, and her voice is raised.
Girl: Please! I just want to help you! You have no idea how important you are to me!
Mike: I don't know if you're a fangirl, or a nutcase, but this is getting old. Get lost, go home, and don't talk to me anymore.
He angrily continues down the path, somewhat aware of what a dick he's being, but too drunk to care. Behind him, the girl squats and begins sobbing in her hands. He sighs, beginning to feel a little guilty, but still extremely annoyed and feeling it's too late to go back from this now.
He finally arrives at Slackers and enters through the back door. Inside, Wario and Mew are cleaning up the place, having been closed for the last few minutes.
Wario: There you are! How was Stompy?
Mike: Stompy was good.
You'd think that after a night at his favorite place, he'd be in a decent mood. Instead, he sits down at a barstool, tugs his own hair, and groans.
Wario: Wuh-oh, looks like someone's in "angry drunk" mode.
Mike: You would be, too, if you were being stalked all day by some creepy teenage girl!
Mew: Um... what?
Mike: It's even worse than when you two were playing superheroes!
Wario: What the hell are you talking about? Mew and I have never done such a thing!
Mew: War, give it a rest. He already got us to admit it, no point in carrying that on anymore.
Wario: Admit what? I ain't admitting nothing!
Mike: Whatever.
Mew: So what's the big deal? Is she threatening you or something? Blackmail?
Mike: No, she keeps following me saying I'm in danger and she needs to save my life, or something.
Mew: Wait, really?
Mike: Yes!
Mew: So... where's the harm in that?
Mike: The hell do you mean by that?
Wario: Well, it's not like she's trying to kill you or anything. I don't get what all the fuss is about.
Mike angrily stands up, looks at two of his best friends in the whole world, and screams at them.
Mike: I don't need anyone saving my fucking life, okay?!
The others are slightly taken aback, and definitely look worried. Mew, especially, looks upset.
Mew: Mike, I think you should lay off. On her and yourself. I don't know what's gotten into you, but you're being unnecessarily harsh.
Mike: Mind your own business. I'm my own person and I'll decide what's best for myself.
He turns to the elevator.
Mike: I'm going to bed.
As he walks to the elevator and disappears within it, Mew tilts his head and frowns.
Wario: What's wrong with you?
Mew knows exactly what's wrong. His trainer's self-esteem and self-worth have taken a complete nosedive today. It's not a permanent thing, but every now and then, Mike sinks into a state of self-loathing. When it happens, it greatly upsets Mew, and he's been able to get through to Mike a few times to bring him out of it or just be there for him and let him cry it out, but tonight, Mew simply can't take it, and feels he can do nothing about it.
However, he neglects to share this with Wario.
Mew: Nothing...
Wario: I've seen that look before. You okay, Mew?
Mew looks at the ground and sighs.
Mew: No.
Three hours later...
We fade into a brief montage of what Mike's been up to the last few minutes. We start off with a shot of a tea kettle whining to be picked up off its electric burner, then cut to Mike pouring himself a cup of scalding hot water, infused with a bag of Earl grey tea. He takes a sip and sets the cup next to a glass of ice water. The lights are dim, and he is illuminated by raindrops falling down the front window. He briefly looks up, upon hearing a crash of thunder, then resumes wiping down his bar with a trusty towel.
He takes another sip of his tea and breathes in the steam. The guilt for his outbursts at the stranger and at his friends had stopped him from falling asleep earlier, and he decides to both be productive and pull himself out of his stupor. The water and the caffeine have certainly helped him regain a sense of his normal self, and working hard has always left him feeling more satisfied.
He figures he'll talk to Mew and Wario in the morning and apologize for snapping at them.
The girl, on the other hand...
Is standing outside the bar's front door, clearly seen through the large window, her head hanging low, completely soaked from the rain outside. A flash of lightning briefly casts her shadow over the bar's floor. Mike takes a look outside and sighs. He gently sets his tea down on the clean counter, not thinking about the hellstorm that Misty will soon bring after he's left a drink on the counter without a coaster again, and walks over to the front door. He opens it and looks at the heartbroken girl. She can't look at any part of him but his feet, and he can't tell if her face is covered with rain or tears.
Mike: Hey, look, about earlier...
Girl: You don't need to say anything, Mihalis. I just came by to tell you I'm sorry, and I promise I'll never bother you again.
The guilt begins to rear its ugly head again, and Mike once again sighs. He gets down on one knee to meet her at eye level. She doesn't seem younger than 13, but at her height, build, and development, she could easily pass for 10.
Mike: No, I'm the one who needs to apologize. I shouldn't have been so rude and dismissive at the park earlier. Whatever reasons you had, there's no excuse for how I spoke to you. I am very sorry.
She sniffles and finally brings herself to look him in the eye.
What he sees triggers a protective feeling deep inside. And he has no idea why.
Mike: But I'm serious about one thing. Being out here, alone in the dark like this? You should really take your own advice. It's not safe, especially in weather like this. You're young, you shouldn't worry about an old fart like me. You've got your own life, your own future. Those should be most important to you.
She briefly endures the temptation to smile at the man before her, but her conscience won't allow for more than two seconds before she feels her body forcing her to look down again.
Girl: But... that's exactly what I'm doing.
Mike raises an eyebrow.
Mike: Pardon?
She takes a deep breath.
Girl: I'm not supposed to tell you this... but...
He tilts his head a little, indicating she has his full attention. Her lips quiver, not in sadness, but in what looks like fear. She looks at him with big, bright eyes, like she's longing to feel loved.
Girl: I'm your daughter.
Mike: ...
Girl: ...
Mike: ... excuse me?
He's known some pretty messed-up levels of confusion in his life, but he knows she can't be telling the truth. The only woman he's ever been with was Misty, and she has never given any indication of having ever been pregnant.
Sakura: My name is Sakura Kasumi Sakaki Dualwielder.
Mike: That's... I...
And even if there had been an affair, he would never expect a daughter to have Misty's middle name as her own, as well as both his birth and adoptive surnames.
Sakura: I was born fourteen years from now. In the future, my mom had told me lots of stories about you, and my whole life, I've wanted to meet you for myself.
Mike: *skeptical* Uh huh.
Sakura: She told me that while she was pregnant with me, you died in an accident of some kind, but she never told me exactly how. All I know is that it happened around this time. I was hoping that by saving you, I could... well, you could... I don't know, be there in my life.
Mike scratches his head. He doesn't believe a word he's hearing, but at the same time, he can't sense any deception from the young girl. It's one of the most awkward situations he's found himself in, and he combs through the deepest depths of his mind to find a way out of this.
He finally resorts to humor.
Mike: So, what, you here for your inheritance or something?
He lets out a gentle laugh, but she sighs and her head drops again. Clearly his comment has hurt her feelings. He curses himself mentally for making a bad move.
Mike: Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel bad.
Sakura: It's okay...
He reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder. She gasps and looks at him.
Mike: I meant what I said, though. You're young and have your whole life ahead of you. And it's not safe out here. You really should be going home and getting some rest.
Her heart sinks. She can't believe what she's hearing.
Sakura: Wait... what? So...
Mike tries to offer a kindly, reassuring smile, but it's only met with awful disappointment.
Sakura: You don't believe me?
Mike: I believe your heart's in the right place, I really do. You're a sweet girl with a lot to look forward to, and I just want you to succeed.
Sakura begins crying in the rain again, unable to bring herself to look at Mike anymore.
Mike: Come on, let me drive you home.
Sakura: No... that's okay, just... please... PLEASE try and take care of yourself, and be safe. Okay? Promise?
Mike: I promise. You don't need to worry about me. Look out for yourself. I'll be safe if you will too.
He stands up. She's motionless.
Mike: Hang on, at least let me get you an umbrella.
Mike walks back into the bar, knowing full well he has no idea where the umbrella is, not since Wario tried combining it with his farts to make himself able to glide. Thankfully, wherever it is, it's been sanitized by radiation, and therefore safe for use once again. While looking for it, he looks outside again and sees Sakura jaywalking on her own. He starts walking that way without the umbrella to at least give her a warning about crossing busy New Donk streets while they're slippery from the rain.
His walk turns into a full-on sprint when he hears a horn.
Without even thinking, he bursts out the door and across the street, towards the obviously tired girl.
Mike: GET OUT OF THE WAY!
Sakura: Huh? AAH!
Scared beyond belief, all she can do is stop in her tracks, squeeze her eyes shut, and block out the bright headlights with her hands to her face. She's unaware of it until it happens, but she finds herself flat on the ground, having been knocked over by the nearby bar owner before he was hit by the oncoming vehicle.
Sakura: NO!
She tries to get up, and slips on the street to fall back on her face again. After the second attempt, she scrambles over to an unconscious Mike, still breathing, but in horrible shape. She gets on the ground next to him and cradles his head in her lap.
Sakura: No... nonononono...
The driver of the car quickly gets out and runs to the rescue.
Driver: Oh my god, is he okay?! I'm so sorry!
Sakura: Call an ambulance! Please!
Driver: I'm on it, just stay with him!
Sakura begins sobbing as she touches Mike's face for the first time in her life, slowly rocking his head.
Another three hours later...
In a room often called the land of "impatient patients," Mew and Misty find themselves waiting. All Misty can do is shake her head as she's looking at the hospital logo once again. They are so used to their friends or family being injured that unless it's a death sentence, all this is is an inconvenience.
Mew: Did they say what happened this time?
Misty: *nonchalant* He got hit by a car or something, I dunno.
Mew: You don't seem surprised. At all.
Misty: Nah. He's fine. Between him and Wario, I'm expecting to get a platinum rewards card from this place.
Mew: Really?
Misty rolls her eyes.
Misty: Besides, you're a Mew.
Mew: Duh.
Misty: You can just go "poof" and he's all better.
Mew: I don't know. This feels different.
Misty: How so?
Mew: I saw something earlier that freaked me out. I thought this might've had something to do with it.
Misty: What are you talking about?
Their conversation is interrupted by a staff member opening the door.
Staff: Misty Waterflower?
Misty: Coming!
Misty stands up as Mew levitates to her eye-level.
Mew: I'll tell you in a bit, after we're all together. Mike needs to hear it too.
Misty and Mew follow the staffer through the door, along the hallways, and into Room 666 (it's a coincidence, I promise). Laying there, covered in casts and bandages, is an irritated-looking Mike.
Mike: It's been hours! Where the hell were you?
Misty: *yawning* Sleeping.
Mew: At least you're honest. *to Mike* What happened?
Mike: I'll tell you what happened, I finally gave that stupid stalker the light of day and got myself hit by a fucking car!
Mew, stunned, shakes his head rapidly.
Mew: Wait, that's why you're here?
Mike: Why else?
Mew: Because I...
Mew looks back at Misty, then back at Mike again.
Mew: I saw an assassin outside the alley behind the bar!
Misty: Wait, what?
Mike: Huh?
Mew: I caught him and got him to tell me he was waiting on you to go out for a smoke break. He had a pretty hefty sniper rifle handy.
Mike: Good boy, Mew.
Mew beams.
Misty: What'd you do to him? Did you find out who sent him, or why he was trying to kill Mike?
Mew laughs nervously.
Mew: Well... you see...
Mike: You amnesia'd him and sent him on his way without asking, didn't you.
Mew: When you put it that way, it makes me sound... incontinent.
Misty: *correcting him* Incompetent. Gross.
Mike: Try putting it in a way that doesn't.
Mew: I found a bad guy and I saved your life?
Mike: What the hell is it with everyone trying to save my life today?!
Mew: Well, clearly your life needed saving! You could have died!
Mike: Wait...
For a while, Mike's brain goes into a fog. He knows there's some kind of connection to be made, but he can't quite bring himself to make it.
Mew: Are you okay? You look like you're constipating.
Misty: That's just the face he makes when he's trying reeeeally hard to figure something out.
Mike: So, if I hadn't gotten distracted by the girl...
Mew: You would have gone out for a smoke break like you always do.
Mike: And... I'd have been killed?
Misty: Huh. Maybe she did save your life, after all.
Mew: By getting him hit by a car. It's unorthodox, but hey, can't argue with results.
Mike's expression goes blank, then turns to shock, and slowly to remorse.
Mew: Besides, my healing powers can only do so much. I can't heal you if you're dead. And, need I remind you, I know what death is like.
A massive wave of guilt overwhelms Mike.
Sakura was telling the truth.
Mike: Guys, do you know what she said to me before I got hit?
Misty: Well, no, this is the first time we've talked to you since it happened.
Mike ignores Misty's sarcasm and continues.
Mike: Mis... she said she was our daughter from the future.
Everyone in the room is speechless for ten seconds.
Mew: Now THAT, I was not expecting.
Everyone: ...
Mew: ... sorry.
Misty: She... what?
Misty squeezes her eyes shut tight, then feels them open up to the size of Mew's ego.
Mike: She said her name was Sakura, and she came back in time to save my life.
He sighs and looks down.
Mike: I didn't believe her when she told me.
Mew: Well, think about it, Mike. You and I have violated the space/time continuum quite a lot in our adventures. It's possible she really could be telling the truth.
Misty: Still... it seems really hard to believe.
Mike's eyes been to water.
Mike: You didn't SEE her, Misty. She really looked emotionally attached. Even then I knew she believed she was telling the truth, but I didn't actually think she was. Until now.
Mew: It must have had a real impact for you to get so emotional.
Mike: Mew, everything makes me emotional.
Mew: Good point.
Mike: But seriously, I think she really meant it! She had to! And now that I think about it...
He looks at Misty longingly.
Mike: She looked a lot like you did when I first met you.
Misty sits down. Curiosity is beginning to overwhelm her, and she forces herself to take deep breaths.
Misty: So what do we do?
Mike: I have to find her! She's out there alone at night, she might be in danger!
Misty: Yeah, but you're not really in the best shape to go out looking for her.
Mew closes his eyes, fully expecting Mike to be looking at him with pleading eyes when he opens his own. He is not disappointed.
Mike: Mew, I need to get out of here. Can you heal me? Please?
Mew: Normally I'd just let you sit here and think about the consequences of your actions. But, in this case...
Mew closes his eyes again and casts his trademark Heal Pulse upon his trainer. Mike immediately and furiously rips all the bandages and casts off his body, not taking into account his scent. The others, however, are making it painfully obvious.
Misty: Jesus! You smell like Wario after Taco Bell!
Mew: We don't have to worry about that for much longer! *winks at the camera*
Mike: I'll shower later, this is important!
A knock is heard on the door, and a nurse gently helps herself inside.
Then she sees Mike fully healed and out of bed and screams.
Mike: MEW!
Mew: Uh... hang on!
FLASH
Nurse: ...
Mew: Your, um... fine work has brought this man back to full health in record time. You released him a few minutes ago and we're seeing ourselves out.
Nurse: ...
Mew: ... hello?
Misty: Mew, I think you might've overdone it.
Mew: Sorry, it's hard to control when I'm panicked!
Mike: Can we just go so we can get looking already?!
Misty calmly takes Mike by the arm.
Misty: Sweetheart... I want to find her and ask her the same questions you do. But you've been through a lot. You haven't slept in a long time, and you were hit by a car. You should get some sleep before we go looking.
Mike: Screw that, I want to go now!
Misty: I know. But it's already 5am and your mind's all over the place. Please. I promise you'll feel better after you get some sleep.
Mike: But...
He sighs. He knows she's right, and he reluctantly agrees.
Mike: Alright. But first thing in the morning, I'm going to find her.
Mew: ... I think you mean first thing in the afternoon?
Mike glares at Mew, whom laughs nervously before initiating the teleport that will bring them all back to their warm, dry bedroom safe at home.
Yet another three hours later...
You might as well have directly injected Mike's bloodstream with caffeine. The whole time he's been in bed, he's been unable to sleep. The concept of even closing his eyes for longer than five seconds feels incredibly out of reach. He can't think about rest, or sleep, or recovery. All he can think of is his possible future daughter being out there, heartbroken and alone.
He rolls over. Then rolls over again.
And in his next fully conscious moment, he finds himself in the park early in the morning, staring at a quiet girl sitting on a bench, feeding ducks. Only now is he remembering that he had grown tired of not being able to sleep (that doesn't make much sense now that I've written it) before leaping out of bed, hurriedly throwing on some clothes, nearly running for the elevator, and actually running for the park in a desperate attempt to find her. And he feels lucky that he has found her in the first place he's looked, not too far from where she had been waiting for him the night before.
She doesn't look like a stranger to him anymore. She looks almost like... himself.
In her he sees the boy broken by betrayal and heartbreak, desperately wanting to feel loved and at home. In a weird, and painfully sappy and cringey way, he hopes that by calmly approaching her and sitting beside her without saying anything can satisfy what that boy might have needed a long time ago.
So he does.
Mike: Sakura Dualwielder, right?
No answer.
Mike: You haven't forgotten how to talk, have you?
Her only response is tossing more bread crumbs out at the flock of hungry ducks. She's pretty sure she just saw two pecking each other furiously. And he's pretty sure he's just heard one of the ducks quack "fuck you" to the other duck.
Mike: I came by to say thank you. No matter your motivation, you obviously really care about my wellbeing.
Nothing.
Mike: Turns out you were right. There was someone waiting to shoot me in the alley last night, and if you hadn't distracted me, I wouldn't be here.
Sakura finally brings herself to speak.
Sakura: I got you hurt. After everything you said, and everything that's happened, I'm surprised you're here. I figured you'd want to be as far away from me as possible.
Mike sighs and sits for a moment, at a loss for words. There's no taking back his behavior earlier. Finally, he thinks of what to say.
Mike: Did you mother ever tell you I had a Mew?
Sakura: Yeah. I've known Mew my whole life. He's actually the one who sent me back.
Mike: And he didn't go with you?
Sakura: He said something like "if I found a younger version of myself in the past, then we'd suddenly see an outbreak of Mew babies and we wouldn't be rare anymore."
Such a crass remark is the final missing puzzle piece for Mike, as he now fully believes his future daughter's story.
Mike: That... um... definitely sounds like Mew, alright.
Sakura: I asked him to send me anyway, and he warned me that if I went, I'd have to find my own way back.
Mike: Wait, so you're stuck in the past with no way of getting home?
Her shoulders heave a little bit as she begins to cry.
Sakura: I-I don't even care at this point. I came here so I could save you and get to have you in my life. But I can't even make you believe me, so I can't save you, so you won't... you still won't be...
She begins sobbing. Mike feels burdened with shame and feeds off her sadness. And even feels compelled to put an arm around her right shoulder, giving it a loving squeeze.
Mike: Hey, look... Sakura... there's something I want to tell you.
Sakura: *sniffle* What?
Mike: I believe you.
She calms down a little, and finally looks him in the eyes.
Sakura: You do? Really? You're not just saying that?
Mike: I do. I wish I could say that I wouldn't have been such an asshole if I'd known the truth, but it shouldn't matter. No one should have to go through what you went through, and you should never have to listen to the garbage I was giving you. It took me some time, but I believe you're telling me the truth. You saved me last night. And I'll never be able to thank you enough for that.
Sakura finally begins feeling joy for the first time since seeing him alive, fighting on the street. She wants to smile, but the heavy Dualwielder emotions she's inherited are too much for her. She leaps out of her seat and throws her arms around his neck, sitting sideways in his lap and sobbing into his shoulder.
Sakura: Oh, Dad... it's you... I can't believe it's really you!
If there had ever been any doubt left in Mike's mind about this, it's all gone now. He returns the hug, which seems to last forever, but not long enough. She stands up, and he squats to meet at her level again.
Sakura: I've got so many things I want to ask you, and I have no idea where to start...
Mike: Well... I'm not really sure how to be a dad, but I'm no stranger to all that space/time voodoo stuff. You know you'll need to go back to your own time.
Sakura: I know... *sniff* but I need to know you'll be okay... I want to stay here and protect you.
Mike smiles.
Mike: You already saved my life, Sakura. If Misty and Mew are still around in the future, I'm sure you've heard some weird stories, and how I survived all them.
Sakura: Every day.
Mike: That way I can raise you properly, too. 14 years from now, right? That'd make me 46. Being a bit older and wiser would be good for both of us. I'm sure I'll be waiting there for you now!
Sakura: I know. But...
Mike: That's not the real reason, isn't it?
Sakura looks down and sighs.
Sakura: Honestly... I... well... I've lived my whole life without a dad. Every single day I've wondered what it'd be like. I don't know how many times I've dreamt about you. Drawn pictures of you. Asked my mom about you. Now that you're here, right in front of me...
She throws herself around him again.
Sakura: I don't want to let you go! I'm finally getting to meet you for the first time! I want to stay with you!
Mike smiles. He gives her a quick hug, then gestures for her to let go so he can stand up, too.
Mike: You know what? Fuck the timeline rules.
Sakura: *giggles* Mom always said you had a bit of a potty mouth.
Mike looks extremely embarrassed.
Mike: Um... you'll have to excuse me, I'm not really used to being around kids.
Sakura: It's okay! It's funny. Look, you're turning red!
Mike: Am not!
Sakura: Are too!
Mike rapidly shakes his head, realizing he's actually getting caught in this argument. He brushes it off and takes her hand.
Mike: Come on. There's someone I want you to meet.
The penthouse
Anchor: And in other news, the Red Mountains continue to burn in a seeming attempt to cull tourism, but it appears the elusive maniacal Charizard is working against himself as tourism continues to surge in the area...
Mew: *Dammit, I told Scorch that he was drawing too much attention.*
Mika: *Nice to see his personality hasn't changed after all this time.*
Mew: *I know he loves flying around scaring tourists, but all he's doing is making more people want to see him!*
Mika: *I know, it's like they enjoy being scared to death of getting fire blasted.*
Misty: What's going on?
The Pokemon turn around to see a groggy-looking Misty, having just gotten out of bed and entered the living room.
Mika: Pi pika chu.
Mew: She said "Scorch being Scorch."
Misty: Tell me what else is new.
She walks to the kitchen to find it completely untouched.
Misty: Weird. Anyone seen Mike? Looks like he didn't even make coffee this morning. There isn't shit all over the counter.
Mew: I didn't think his coffee was THAT strong...
Misty: Huh? Oh, EW! NO! I just meant STUFF all over the counter! What the hell's wrong with you?
Mika giggles, Mew smirks.
Misty opens the fridge and searches for something to drink. While her head is well inside the fridge, the elevator doors open, and she hears an unfamiliar voice.
Sakura: MAMA!
Startled, Misty accidentally slams the top of her head on the freezer door above, causing the whole thing to rattle. Mike immediately covers his mouth, hiding his reaction, as Misty more carefully stands up to see their visitor.
She's surprised at how much she does look like her teenage self.
Sakura bolts to the kitchen and hugs Misty, whom is standing there awkwardly, not entirely sure how to react.
Mike: Hey, kid? Remember this is her from the past, she doesn't know who you are yet.
Sakura lets go, realizing what's just happened. She takes a couple of steps back and scratches the back of her head. Misty can't help but stare. She's still not entirely sure if this is really what's happening.
Mike: Misty, this is Sakura.
The young girl looks around the room. It's completely new to her. She does, however, recognize the two Pokemon watching TV in the living room.
Sakura: Oh my god, Mew and Mika are here too?
Mike smiles. Now he knows the two of them will still be around in the future.
Mew: So you're the mystery girl Mike told us about! I'm Mew!
Sakura: Duh.
Mew squees and flips in midair.
Mew: That's it! She's the real deal, alright!
Mike turns his attention back to Misty, smiling.
Mike: How cool is this, Mis?
Misty: It's, um...
Mike: I've thought about this. It took me a while to believe it, so I have an idea. She's already confirmed enough to convince me. Ask her something only a Dualwielder would know.
Sakura: Yeah!
Misty: Alright... how much have I told you about Mike?
Sakura: Everything!
Everything? This worries Mike a little.
Misty: What's my middle name?
Sakura: Kasumi, same as mine!
Misty: Aw...
She shakes her head and refocuses.
Misty: Um... let's see... something she would know that I wouldn't ever ask anyone else... who is the sworn enemy of Wario-Man and Supermew?
Sakura: Dr. Yes! But that was just Dad pretending so he could stop the annoying heroes.
Mew: Annoying? Ouch...
Misty rubs her chin. One more answer will convince her.
Misty: How did your dad and I meet?
Sakura: He whooped your butt in a Pokémon battle because he was using Mew, but even though you gave him a Cascade Badge, he stomped away all sad and misunderstood, so you felt sorry for him and joined him on his adventure.
Mike facepalms. Misty looks overjoyed.
Misty: You are our daughter!
She extends her arms and embraces Sakura. Mike soon walks up to them and joins. When they finally let go, Mike is the first to speak up.
Mike: Sakura, I promise I'll make up for not being there. You and I are going to do everything together!
Misty: Now hang on a minute. It's wonderful that she's here, and I'm glad you two are getting to know each other, but Sakura needs to be in her own timeline.
Mike: I know, but...
Sakura: But...
Misty: *smiling* I'm not saying you need to go back right away. I know this must be quite a lot for you, and we're so thankful that you went back in time to save your dad's life. But I don't want you to forget your own life. I'm sure future me will be wondering where you are!
Mike: Maybe just a couple days?
Sakura: Pleeeeease?
Misty smiles and sighs. She knows she's not going to win this argument.
Misty: Alright. Two days, then it'll be time to go home. Both of us should be waiting for you there.
Sakura: Yay!
Montage
At Coiney Island Amusement Park (bear with me, I'm running out of fake Mario-style names), we see a roller coaster zoom past. From another angle, Mike and Sakura are on the front row, hands in the air and screaming like maniacs.
They cram into a photo booth where they take a bunch of ridiculous pictures together. Mike pays for every single one of them, and two copies of each are printed outside. They walk to a midway game where Sakura tries to knock over a pin by throwing a ball. She misses and looks disappointed. The carnie's tone is really annoying and patronizing, which pisses off Mike, causing him to take a turn and chuck the ball directly at the guy's head. He faints. Mike and Sakura look at each other nervously, grab a bunch of prizes, and scamper off.
At a rock concert, Mike has snuck his daughter in (he might've used Mew to make a fake ID), and she's headbanging even harder than he is.
She takes a tumble on the slopes of Mt. Silver, getting frustrated. Definitely showing signs of her dad's temper. He helps her up and they start skiing down together, but she's pretty quick to outrun him. He is distracted with pride by watching her, and crashes into a tree.
At the New Donk City Pokémon Gym (where Misty is the gym leader), Mike tosses Sakura a Poke Ball. She tosses it out, revealing his Galarian Rapidash, Twyla. He uses Mika and teaches Sakura some of his techniques as they have a battle. He is the happiest he's ever been in his life, having been given the opportunity to have a battle with his daughter.
On the subway, Sakura is seen sketching. When she's done, she shows it to Mike. It's a drawing of the two of them, Misty, Mew, and Mika. Mike is nearly reduced to tears when he sees it. They look at each other smiling.
Something Sakura always wanted to do with the dad she never had was go to a Build-a-Bear, so she convinces Mike to take her. Her inner kid is in full swing as they walk through the process and she makes a stuffed Pikachu. When it's done she hugs him tightly, thanking her for being the father she always wanted. Mike is fully cherishing the daughter he's never had.
That night, Mike takes Sakura to the lounge in Slackers, normally occupied by Mew, where he's made a bed for her. He tucks her in, tells her good night, and leaves her to sleep happily with her new stuffed Pikachu.
And when he emerges from the lounge, he notices his three best friends sitting at their usual poker table, staring at him, waiting to have his attention.
Mike: ... what?
Knuckles: Mike, we need to talk.
He looks at each of them, one by one, in disbelief.
Mike: What, am I having some kind of intervention or something?
Wario: Something like that.
Mike: Okay, look. I already told you guys I'm cutting back on the JOIs.
Knuckles: ... the what?
Wario: Don't ask. That's not what we're talking about, Mike.
Mike: Then what?
Mew: It's about Sakura.
Mike: What about her?
Knuckles: Mike, we're happy that you've been able to experience this. I mean it. But this isn't the type of bonding that girl needs, and it's getting out of hand.
Mike: What gives you the right to judge how I spend my time with my family?
Knuckles: Do I have to remind you that someone tried to kill you the other night? Even if Mew caught the guy, we still have no idea why he did it or who sent him. That's something we need to find out, and you're putting it off!
Mike's mouth hangs slightly ajar as he angrily stares at Knuckles.
Knuckles: Look, I know how you feel, brother. I've got a daughter. I understand that attachment.
Mike: With all due respect, Knuckles, you have no fucking idea how I feel. You can't possibly understand. Your kid belongs in this time. She lives here. Now. You can go back and see her whenever you want.
Knuckles: All I'm saying is-
Mike: No. I don't want to hear it. That's all anyone ever tells me. "She needs to be back in her own time. She needs to be with her future family." I JUST met her the other day, and everyone's trying to pry her away from me!
Knuckles: I know it's hard, okay? I KNOW. My ex tried to pry my kid away from me, and for years, she succeeded. It fucking hurts. And I had no idea how she was going to be treated with her. You have the advantage of knowing Sakura will be raised by you and Misty, and based on what I've seen today, she couldn't ask for more loving parents. She needs to finish her development where that mother left off. Keeping her here would be forcing her to start over, and forcing her away from the Mihalis in the future she was trying to save in the first place. Do you really want to take that away from her?
Mike: But... I just...
He can't remember doing it, but he's found himself collapsed on the nearest bar stool, his head resting on his hand, breathing heavily.
Mike: But I don't want to say goodbye...
Mew: You won't be. Think about the literal definition of the word "future," what's yet to come. It means you will see her again when the time is right.
Mike: I know... I know... you're right...
In the lounge, Sakura is wide awake. And she's heard everything. She hugs her Pikachu tightly, letting tears fall from her face and land on her pillow. Although she has the maturity to know her place, and she understands she needs to go back to her time, she is incredibly upset. She loves her father so much and would give anything to stay with him. She knows she has saved him like she was meant to, but she's still terrified he won't be there in the future.
The penthouse balcony, the following night...
Wario has taken over bartending duties for the night, allowing Mike, Misty, Mew, and Knuckles to sit around the fire pit on the balcony. There, they are discussing how to handle the Sakura situation from here.
Mike: So what's your plan, Mew?
Mew: Well, Sakura told you I was the one who sent her back in time, right?
Mike: Yeah, but you don't know how to time travel. Not that I knew of, at least.
Mew: No, I don't. I must have learned it within the next 14 years. Apparently future me didn't trust himself with me me.
Knuckles: It would give the term "self-love" a whole new meaning.
Misty: Not to mention it would really piss your girlfriend off.
Mew: Not necessarily! Maybe Celebi would enjoy having two of me!
Mike: Okay, stop. Please. Keep it to yourself.
Knuckles: So how do we get her... back to the future?
Mike: Well, I have an idea. Mew, didn't you say once that Dialga owes you a favor?
Misty: Dialga? You mean the Pokémon god of time?
Knuckles: As opposed to Mew, the Pokémon god of burritos.
Mew: Hey, yeah! I could call in that favor!
Knuckles: What does he owe you for, anyway?
Mew: Do you really want to know? It'll probably be one of those things where I'll start explaining it and then you'll cut me off mid-sentence again.
Everyone: ...
Knuckles: You're right. I'll take your word for it. This time.
Sakura: Hi, guys.
Everyone turns their attention to the young girl walking through the glass doorway, and closing the door behind her. She takes an empty seat in front of the fire pit.
Mike: Sakura, we need to talk.
She knows.
Sakura: Oh.
Mike: I know. This is really hard for me, too, but... it's time for you go back to your own time.
She lowers her head.
Sakura: I know... I'm just... scared.
Misty: Scared of what?
Mike notes how Misty sounded especially motherly in her tone.
Sakura: I came here to save Dad from being killed so he could be in my life.
Mew: Hey, between you and me, we saved him from getting whacked, remember?
Sakura: I know, and I'm glad, but... I'm scared he still won't be there!
Mike: Hey... sweetie... look. You were incredibly brave to do what you did. You went back in time with no way of getting back. And I got to have some of the best days of my life with you! Our time together has been amazing and I will always cherish it. And I can't wait to relive it when you're here in this time, too.
Sakura: But how am I supposed to even get back? Mew doesn't have time travel powers.
She secretly hopes no one has the answer, and is a little disappointed when Mew does.
Mew: I have an old friend who can help us.
Sakura: How?
Mew: Well, he's the god of time, for one.
Sakura: Ah. That would do it. But what if something happens to him or Mom between now and then?
Misty: Honey, that's just a part of life. We wake up every day not knowing what the future will bring. It makes each day more precious. It helps us realize that each day's a gift, and that it's up to us to make the most out of it. We can't always control what happens in our lives. We know now that you will exist, and if you're going to be our daughter, then we can't possibly ask for a better one.
Mike is moved by Misty's words. It puts into perspective how much he was dragging himself down not long ago. He needed a reminder like this. He hopes it will help give him the confidence to love himself enough to make it through the next day. And Mew can sense this, bringing him joy and satisfaction.
Knuckles: Hey, Sakura? Can I ask you something?
Sakura: Anything!
Knuckles: Where you come from... am I around?
She smiles.
Sakura: Yes! You've told me as much about my dad as my mom has. You talk about how he was the best friend you ever had, and how much you miss him and love him.
Mike smirks at a blushing Knuckles. He looks like he wants to pound him.
Knuckles: Well... anyway... *deep breath* I sincerely hope I'll have the privilege of getting to know you in my own time.
Sakura: Me too!
Mike sighs and slowly stands from his chair.
Mike: Well... I guess we'd better get on with it.
Everyone slowly and sadly stands up.
Mike: Sakura, you and Mew and I are going to teleport to Sinnoh, a region far from here. Mew's going to ask his friend Dialga to send you back.
Sakura: I understand. I just really hope you're there.
Mike meets her at eye level one more time.
Mike: I promise. I promise I will be there waiting for you on the other side.
Sakura: How do you know?
Mike: I just do. Trust me.
He hugs her quickly, then she turns to Knuckles. They bid each other farewell, then she looks to Misty.
Misty: I'm going to miss you, Sakura.
Sakura runs up to her and squeezes her tight.
Sakura: I love you, Mama...
Misty: I love you too.
They finally let go, and Sakura walks to Mike's side. Mew begins flying circles around them.
Mike: Wait wait, there's something I've always wanted to try...
Mew: Too late!
Mike takes out a small candy from his pocket.
Mike: When I bite into a York Peppermint Patty, I get the sensation...
Mt. Coronet - Sinnoh
Mike: OF BEING ON A FROZEN MOUNTAINTOP!
Sakura: Ugh, Dad! You're so old!
Mike: I know...
Mew: Dude, you're 32. You're not old, quit acting so entitled!
Mike: *sigh*
Sure enough, they have found themselves teleported to the snowy exterior of Mt. Coronet, the highest mountain in the Pokémon world. Nearby is the entrance to a large cave.
Mike: Does Dialga live in there?
Mew: No, he lives in a high-rise condo in Jubilife City; I just like teleporting to caves.
Mike: ... huh?
Sakura: I like this Mew! He's a lot more sarcastic than the one I'm used to!
Mew: So you're telling me I'll lose my snarky charm in the future? Aw...
Sakura: Not all the way, you just mellowed out after...
Mew: After what?
Sakura: ... you know what? I'm not gonna say. You'll have to figure that one out on your own!
Mew: Aw, come on! Once in a lifetime opportunity here! Does it have to do with fame? Wealth? Celebi?
Sakura: I'm not telling!
Mew: Damn... I mean, darn!
Sakura: *laughing* It's okay, I'm fucking used to it!
Mike: You watch your mouth, young lady! ... wait.
Mew: Huh. Maybe you ARE getting old.
Mike: That was weird. It's like it just... came out of me on its own!
Mew: That... sounds like a really dirty joke just waiting to happen.
Sakura: I don't get it.
Mike: And you won't, because if Mew finishes that joke, I'll use my Earth Badge and order him to use Disable on his own mouth!
Mew: Aw...
They make their way inside the cave, bypassing several weak Pokémon. Well, except for a few annoying Zubats that Mew knocks out by simply breathing.
Finally they approach what looks like a gigantic mural carved out of stone, a deep blue light emanating from its creases.
Mike: Whoa...
Sakura: It's pretty!
Mew: Hey! Diagonal! It's Mew!
The whole cave begins to rumble, and Sakura clings to Mike. Lights of unknown origin begin to swirl in front of the mural. The lights multiply and swirl faster, glowing brighter until the others shield their eyes. When the lights fade, they slowly fall to the ground, and the Pokémon god of time is standing there majestically before them.
Dialga: Well, well, well. If it isn't Shrimpy.
Mew: How've you been, old buddy? It's so good to see you!
Dialga: What do you want, Mew? I'm still reeling mentally from the last time I saw you.
Mike: What exactly happened between you two?
Dialga: I'm too much of a man to say, but it involved the powers of time being tampered with inappropriately, and requiring Mew to use his powers of mind erasure on more souls than I can count.
Mew: And remember when you said you owed me for that?
Dialga: ... I did say that, didn't I.
Mew: Well, I'm cashing in!
Dialga: Mew, I know how powerful you are, but I must insist whatever you ask in return be reasonable, sensible, and not something to wipe out the minds of an entire civilization.
Mike: You and I are going to have a long talk when we get back home, Mew.
Mew: *sinister chuckle* I don't think so...
Mike: *to Dialga* I'm Mihalis. I'm Mew's trainer. This is my daughter, Sakura.
Sakura: Hi!
Dialga: A pleasure, Mihalis, but if you really want to know all there is to know about your Mew, you should fly over here on your own someday.
Mike: Interesting. Maybe later. Anyway, the favor is from me. All we need is for you to send Sakura 14 years in the future.
Dialga: Wait, that's it? I got all worked up for a simple time jump?
Mew: I'm a simple Mew.
Dialga: That is something I can do, but I need to inquire your reason.
Mike: That's her original timeline. She came back here to save my life so I'd be alive in the future. We believe she succeeded, and it's time for her to go home.
Dialga: So you're basically asking me to restore the timeline with its proper inhabitants. Be delighted to. But first... Sakura, exactly how did you come back here in the first place? Did I send you?
Mew: SHHHHH!
Sakura: No, Mew did!
Dialga looks disapprovingly at Mew.
Dialga: Oh, really?
Mew: Goddammit... there goes my future power...
Dialga smirks.
Dialga: Then I'll use my power to restore you to your native timeline, Sakura. We can proceed whenever you're ready.
Sakura: Alright...
Sakura knows she'll want to say goodbye to Mike last, so she looks at Mew. The small, pink Pokemon flies in and hugs her. She scratches the back of his head like a cat and he purrs blissfully.
Sakura: Bye, Mew. Thank you for being my friend.
Mew: Of course, kiddo. Take care of yourself.
They let go, and Sakura turns to an already crying Mike. He is desperately trying to hold it back. Seeing this causes her to burst into tears. They run to each other and hug tighter than ever before, refusing to let each other go.
Sakura: I can't do it, I don't want you to be gone again!
Mike: Sakura...
Sakura: It's not fair! I finally get to meet you and now... now...
Mike: I wish it wasn't so hard...
Sakura: I don't want to go, Daddy, I want to stay with you!
He feels like is chest is being mortally pierced.
Mike: I wish I could keep you here forever, sweetheart.
The exchange of words pauses for about a minute.
Mike: But you did what you were meant to do. What you set out to do, despite everything.
Sakura: Please...
Mike: Thank you for saving my life. Thank you for showing me what I have to look forward to. I love you so much, Sakura. I always will.
Sakura can't bring herself to speak.
Mike then proceeds to do the hardest thing he's ever done in his life.
He lets her go.
Both still in tears, they slowly back away from each other, looking into each other's eyes. Dialga unleashes a powerful Roar of Time, and Sakura begins to fade from view.
Sakura: I love you, Dad!
Mike: I love you too! I promise, I'll see you on the other side, really soon!
She holds up a waving hand, and the last thing her father sees is a genuine, loving smile as she completely fades from view.
Mike is inconsolable. He falls to the ground, devastated. Mew flies to his side and, with his little arms, rubs his trainer's back.
Slackers, you guessed it, three hours later...
At the signature poker table, the guys are sitting around solemnly. With the exception of Mike, whose seat is currently being occupied by Misty.
Wario: How's he holding up?
A beer bottle comes flying through the door from the lounge, shattering against the bar.
Wario: Ah.
Mew: It wasn't a pretty sight. After she left, he just... sank. Lower than I've ever seen before. I've never seen him this distraught.
Misty: I know. I miss that girl, too, but I know we all did the right thing. Still...
She hears him shouting at the TV in the lounge.
Misty: He must have really connected with her deeply. He's taking it really hard.
Knuckles: You think we ought to go check on him?
Wario: Eh... I think not. Last time I tried to calm him down from a drunken rage he broke my nose.
Knuckles: And you haven't gotten around to fixing it yet?
Wario: What do you mean? Mew healed me right after it happened!
Knuckles: Then how do you explain why it's so big and pink and swollen?
Wario: Hardy-fucking-har.
Knuckles gets up without saying anything. He's going in.
Wario: Your funeral.
Knuckles enters the lounge. Carefulness be damned.
Knuckles: Hey.
Mike is drunk again, but not to the point where he's inebriated beyond comprehension.
Knuckles: You look like you could use a pal.
Mike: What do you want?
Knuckles: Nothing. You need company, and I'm here to provide it.
Mike: I just want to be alone.
Knuckles: No you don't.
Knuckles takes a seat on the couch next to Mike, who is sitting on the make shift bed he'd made for Sakura.
Mike: I know it was the right call, but it sucks. I HATED doing that.
Knuckles: I know, buddy. I know.
It doesn't take long for the others to follow suit. Mew flies up to his own bed, Wario sits on the opposite end of the couch, and Misty sits on Mike's lap.
Misty: I learned something about you.
Mike: What's that?
Misty: You're going to be such a good dad.
She pecks him on the cheek, and he's able to manage a half smile.
Knuckles: Can't argue there. You really showed her how much you loved her.
Wario: Hang on a minute...
They all look at Wario, expecting him to make some off-color remark with his famously poor timing.
Wario: I just thought of something. Sakura came back in time to stop Mike from being killed, right?
Mew: Yeah?
Wario: In her timeline, Mike died in an assassination, which was supposed to be a couple of days ago. But she came back in time anyway, meaning she was born one way or another.
Mike: What's your point, Wario?
Wario groans, trying to think of how to phrase it.
Wario: If you think about that, plus the fact that she will be thirteen, fourteen years from now...
Mew: You're saying Sakura would have had to exist one way or another.
Wario: Or she does exist. Now. In our time.
Misty: That's impossible. I think I'd remember giving birth.
Knuckles: Mike, you remember a few nights ago, when we were playing poker, and you were trying to describe that night you had with Misty?
Mew: Yeah, the gross one you wouldn't stop bragging about?
Mike begins laughing nervously, and Misty looks even more pissed.
Mike: Locker room talk?
The only reason she won't punch him now is because of his recent traumatic experience.
Slowly everyone begins to realize what Wario is implying, and they all stare wide-eyed at Misty.
Misty: ... what?
Wario: Either it's exactly what we're all thinking, or Mike went off and had a baby with someone else.
Misty punches Wario.
Wario: I had that coming...
Knuckles: Do you think it's possible that Misty... might... be pregnant?
Wario: I don't think pregnancies from only a couple days ago will show up on a test.
Knuckles: Still, let me go to the store and grab one. If what we're all suspecting is true...
Mew: No need!
Without any warning, Mew's eyes begin glowing green, and he stares intently at Misty's belly.
Mike: Um... what are you doing?
Mew: Ultrasonic vision!
Misty: What the fuck, Mew?! You can't just go around scanning people without asking!
Mew's green eyes fade back into their natural color, and he hangs there, levitating, looking completely shocked by what he's seen. He doesn't need to say anything for the others in the room to realize what his reaction means.
Misty covers her mouth in shock. Wario and Knuckles open their eyes wider than they'd ever thought possible.
They expect Mike to freak out and run for the hills, like so many men do when they realize their girlfriends are pregnant. But Mike?
He's overjoyed. He gives Misty the biggest hug possible, a giant smile adorning his face.
Mike: Mew?
Even Mew's eyes well up as he smiles at the couple.
Mew: Yeah. I saw a fetus. It's true.
Everyone begins shouting in celebration. Wario leaps up and makes for the bar, intent on getting drinks for everyone. Knuckles looks on Mike with pride.
Knuckles: I'm happy for you, brother.
Mike: I... I can't believe it! I'm gonna be a dad! I get to see Sakura again!
He and Misty embrace, overwhelmed with happiness.
Wario: We gotta celebrate!
Wario distributes glasses of champagne to everyone but Misty. He begins to approach her with one, but yoinks it away at the last second.
Wario: Sorry preggers, none for you!
Misty is still laughing from the news.
Misty: I don't care!
Everyone minus Misty takes a glass and clinks them together before partaking. Mike can't focus, though. All he can think about is seeing his daughter again.
The penthouse
In the kitchen, Mike approaches the fridge. He takes out two folded pieces of paper: the first one is the photo booth set he and Sakura made at the theme park, and he hangs it on the fridge with a magnet. The second one is the drawing she made him, and it's magnetically placed as the new centerpiece.
He looks on with a smile.
Mike: I'll see you soon, sweetheart.
He turns and walks away, and we slowly zoom in on the fridge's new, precious artwork, before everything fades to black.
Epilogue
We fade back in and see the streets of New Donk City. Here, a clueless-looking man is wandering aimlessly.
Voice: There you are!
The clueless guy looks around in a panic, wondering where the voice came from. When we see his face, we recognize him as the would-be assassin as described by Mew.
Assassin: Hello? Who's there?
Voice: It's your boss, numb nuts.
Assassin: ... boss?
A tall, narrow, black portal appears out of thin air, and a tall man emerges, his features entirely concealed by a hooded black cloak with a large metal zipper running all the way up the middle. He holds out a hand, and a beam of terrible darkness emerges from the gloved hand, hitting the assassin's head. The hooded man lowers his hand and the beam ceases, and the assassin shakes his head quickly as he begins to regain his memory.
Assassin: What's going on?
Boss: I'm extremely disappointed in you. You had ONE JOB.
Assassin: It wasn't my fault! You never told me he had a Mew! That stupid thing ambushed me and must've wiped my memory!
Boss: Regardless, the timeline is now out of balance. I feel the shape of our entire future has been shifted. We must move quickly if our order is to survive.
Assassin: What do you suggest? Why is this guy so important?
Boss: You nor anyone else could ever understand the significance of Mihalis continuing to exist.
Assassin: Then we'll try again! We'll get him!
The boss turns back to face the portal.
Boss: That...
He walks calmly and evilly into the portal.
Boss: Would be ideal.
The assassin quickly follows behind, and he is able to leap through the portal before it closes.
To be continued...
2022
