Many thanks to the wonderful Kumi for her assistance on this much delayed chapter.

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Bunny Be Mine - chapter 2

As Xander burst through the door of the Magic Box, battleaxe in hand, Anya threw herself at him. Her anger at him was forgotten for the moment and all she saw was someone who would save her from the bunny monster. She couldn't believe she'd touched its ears. How would she ever get her hands clean?

"Oh thank God you're here! I touched it! It was horrible!"

Xander held the sobbing woman, trying to make sense of her words. Was Spike a lousy lay? Did he ask her to do strange, perverted things? Did Xander really want to know what she'd touched? Maybe there was no need to be angry with Anya over this. Maybe he could take it all out on Spike. Oh yeah, he really liked the thought of that.

He considered dropping the axe so he could hold Anya properly. He had doubted that he'd ever get the chance again. Hadn't been sure he'd wanted to when he saw...saw...God, he couldn't even think about it. But if the way Anya was clinging to him now was any indication, then she forgave him for hurting her. And she was regretting her activities with Bleach Boy.

"Hey, An. It's okay. I'm here. Willy Wannabite's going down this time. I came prepared." Xander patted Anya's back with his free hand as he brought the axe into her line of sight.

When she saw Xander's weapon, Anya suddenly calmed down.

"You can't kill Spike."

"What? But...he hurt you!"

"Why do you think that? The only one who hurt me was you. No it was...was..." Anya couldn't control the fear that swept through her as she remembered exactly what had caused her panic.

"B...b...b...aaaarrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!"

"Anya? An? What's wrong?" Xander tried to get her attention as she ran round in circles, flapping her arms around like a demented chicken. What was going on with her? Maybe she'd gone insane or something. She was certainly acting like a mad woman. It would explain what the hell she'd been doing on the table with Spike. And where was the bleached pain in the ass anyway?

"Wouldn't bother, Harris. She'll be doin' that for at least ten minutes. Then she'll sit in the floor shaking for a bit before she starts up again. Well, that's what happened before you turned up and the daft bint 'ad her moment of lucidity." Spike's voice came from the shadows between the table and the wall.

Xander started towards the table, his eyes flicking from the place he thought was the source of the voice and Anya, who was still doing an impression of deranged poultry. Should he try and calm Anya down or just get on with introducing his axe to Spike's head? Hadn't Buffy's mom used an axe on Dead Boy junior once? Xander had a vague memory of Spike and Joyce getting kinda nostalgic about it. Joyce had been a lovely lady but her taste in guys just sucked. No pun intended.

"C'mon out, Deadboy. Hiding is not gonna save your chipped ass this time. You are dust. You hear me? I don't know what you did to Anya and I guess I don't give a damn. Cos this has been a long time coming." Xander took a better grip on the axe as he waited for the vampire to show himself.

From the darkness behind the table came the sound of movement. There was a stirring of the shadows and the minimal light in the shop showed a flash of white.

"No need for threats, whelp, but you might give a vamp a chance to explain."

As Spike stepped forward, Xander lifted the axe a little higher.

"I don't want to hear it Spike. Just step up and take your dusting with a bit of dignity. You really are...what the f -"

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"Willow, get Dawn. Meet me at the Magic Box. I've got to...I don't know what I've got to do. Stop Xander, I guess. This is so not of the good. Stupid vampire." As she was speaking, the Slayer ran in to the living room and raided the weapons chest for something pointy. Willow just hoped Buffy wouldn't have to use it. Before she had a chance to ask if Buffy had any idea what she was going to do about Spike and his new found rabbit ears the room was empty and the only sign of the Slayer's exit was the slamming of the front door.

"Dawnie, sweetie, can you come down stairs? We've got to go. There's an emergency at the Magic Box." Willow had the feeling that getting Dawn out of the house wasn't going to be easy.

She was right.

"Ewww! No way! My eyes are still burning from seeing that...that..eww! I don't need to see the scene of the crime and watch them in action for real."

It still amazed Willow that the teenager's voice could travel so clearly through a firmly closed door and down the stairs. She should have been used to it by now. She wondered if Spike's hearing allowed him to pick up Dawn's words from all the way downtown. The witch was sure the neighbours had caught every word. Hopefully they hadn't understood it though.

It looked like she'd just have to go upstairs and get Dawn out of her room the old fashioned way. Brute force. After all, it worked for Buffy.

So Willow started up the stairs with the intention of hammering on Dawn's bedroom door and dragging the sulking teen kicking and screaming out of the house. Only to stop half way as said teen came thundering out of her room and nearly knocked Willow over.

"Why are you standing there? Don't we have to get to the Magic Box?" Dawn asked from her position by the front door.

After a stunned moment Willow decided not to ask about Dawn's change of heart. Although the strange smile on the girl's face had her a little worried. As well as kinda wigged. Why did she have the feeling that Dawn's sudden eagerness to do as asked meant nothing but trouble? As if there wasn't enough trouble already.

Oh well, no time to think about it now. They had a mutated vampire and a homicidal carpenter to separate.

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Buffy raced down the streets of Sunnydale. Images and thoughts flashed through her mind. She couldn't work out which worried her more - the glimpse of Xander with axe in hand or the action replay of Spike, half dressed and fully occupied doing...well, things he shouldn't be doing.

She couldn't stop the thoughts but she'd do her damndest to ignore them. Her mission was to prevent damage to the Magic Box. Yep, that was it. No concern for Spike. None at all. She was just keeping Giles from having to go through another refit. That's all. Because the rest of it really didn't matter. No sir. And it wasn't her problem. Uh huh. And why should she feel guilty just 'cos she knew better than to make wishes? Not that she had made any wishes. None. No way was she wish girl. That was her story and she was sticking to it. Even though no one had asked. But just in case.

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"C'mon Willow! Hurry!"

The witch was feeling breathless. Dawn wasn't as fast as her sister but she still had a lot more energy than a magic deprived Wicca. Willow knew it had been a bad idea to let Dawn have those extra cookies that afternoon. But she'd felt guilty for.something. Although she couldn't quite remember what. And this was her real atonement. Desperately trying to keep up with a teenager on a sugar high. And she still hadn't figured out why Dawn was suddenly so keen to get in on the action.

But there was no time to think about it now. Her oxygen-depleted brain was struggling with the concept of one foot in front of the other. She'd leave working out the puzzle of Dawn's mind to Buffy. After all, it was her responsibility, right?

"God, you are so slow! Willow, if we don't hurry, then I'll lose any chance of seeing Spike naked."

Oh.

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Xander had backed up against the shelves, a look of horror on his face, the axe lying on the floor where he'd unwittingly dropped it. Spike stood behind the table still, head down, desperately trying not to scratch his ears. He was starting to wonder if he had fleas. But at least the Whelp wasn't trying to brain him with the axe. Although right now? It might not be a bad thing.

All the signs of a hangover from hell were making themselves apparent. A taste like day-old blood in the back of his mouth, the pounding in his temples, the feeling that his eyes were drying up in their sockets. None of which was helped by the fact that Anya was still breaking into high- pitched squeals every time she caught a glimpse of the mutated vamp. Spike felt like a bloody idiot. Even worse, he suspected he was starting to brood.

What the fuck had happened? He couldn't understand any of it. Okay, so...he'd been feeling lonely and heartbroken over the Slayer. Nothing new there. And alcohol had been calling to him like siren song. And Anya had the alcohol. And understood the emotional crap. But still, he must have been really out of it to start shagging the girl. Not that she was bad looking. Not at all. But you don't shit where you sleep. And none of that explained the sodding ears! Had he unknowingly eaten a gypsy? Not likely. And certainly not recently. Tainted blood? Didn't think so. He'd been going to the same butcher for months now and the guy had a good rep. Couldn't use bad blood for spell casting and most of the guy's other customers were in the magic biz. Not many vamps had to go through the humiliation of bagging it. So what the fuck was going on?

And one other thing was puzzling him...

"Whelp, how did you know?"

Xander looked shook his had, as if trying to clear his vision.

"Know what? And did you know you had-" the brunette waved his index finger vaguely in the direction of the top of Spike's head.

"Yeah, yeah. Trying a new style. Not my point. How did you know about the demon bird and me? You came in here all blood and thunder, tooled up and ready to take my head off. So you knew. And I want to know how." Spike considered going into game face but thought that the bone shift on top of the hangover might just send him to his knees in pain. And it didn't exactly scare the natives anymore.

"We saw you. On Willow's computer. You and...Anya...on the table...doing...things." Xander dropped his head into his hands briefly before turning his attention to his whimpering ex. "Oh God, Anya, how could you?"

At his words, Anya looked up at him, contempt clear on her face.

"Why Xander! I didn't know you cared. It's so difficult to tell, what with you deserting me on my wedding day. What business is it of yours if I chose to share my body with a sexy, virile male who doesn't pretend to love me and then run off and humiliate me in front of everybody I know? I don't see how it is-"

"Hey! People! So bloody sorry to break up your little heart to heart but got a problem here. Once you two get started we'll be here all bloody night. And there is no way in hell I'm gonna be stuck here with you two bickering till I start to shed my winter coat! Whelp, you said you saw us on Red's computer. Who exactly was 'we'?"

All three heads turned towards the shop door as the bell rang out.

"Well, gee, Spike. That 'we' would include me. What have you got to say for yourself this time?"

For a moment Spike contemplated the woman silhouetted in the doorway.

"Good evening to you too, Slayer."

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"Ummmm...Dawnie? Not that I want to, y'know, er, slow you down or anything but...ummmm...Spike was fully dressed last I saw."

The teenager stopped suddenly and turned towards Willow, disappointment warring with embarrassment on her face.

"Geez, I was just...joking! Yeah, it was a joke. Like I'd wanna see Spike naked. No way! That's just...gross. Eww." Dawn was careful not to look directly at the witch but sneaked sideways looks from under her hair to see if Willow believed her. Didn't look like it.

"Uh huh. Right. So why are we running?"