Title: A Sunnydale Tale
Author: victoriamartynne
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Spoilers: None.
Summary: In 1998, Angel befriends Cordelia when the going gets tough.
"I thought I was dealing, you know?" She told him later on that night as they sat in the living room.
Cordelia was curled up in the arm chair and Angel was sat on the couch with his feet on the coffee table.
"I thought I was dealing but I guess I'm not." She wiped her red rimmed eyes with a tissue. "Today proved that."
"It takes time. Today doesn't mean you're not dealing. It was just a setback. You need to have setbacks to heal properly. I mean, imagine if you never have setbacks and then ten years down the line you see someone who looks like Greg and you freak out. Imagine how you'd feel then." He told her reasonably.
"I guess." She nodded and pulled the blanket off the side of the chair and covered her bare legs with it. "I would like to eventually have a life."
"You have a life now."
"But not a real one." She wiped her eyes again. "I mean, I can't go out alone 'cause I get scared. I can't stop in on my own 'cause I get scared. I'm scared to be around my friends because I don't know what they'll think of me. I'm practically scared of my own shadow. How is that a life?"
"I think you're pushing yourself too hard." He told her. "It's only been three weeks. You're rushing yourself into feeling okay about what happened. You have to give it time."
"I'm sick of being told I need time." She argued, brushing away tears. "I'm okay when I don't think about it or when I don't see reminders of what happened. But then I do and I feel bad and ashamed all over again."
Angel swung his legs off the coffee table and sat up. "You have nothing, and I mean nothing, to be ashamed about. What happened it not your fault. You are a victim. And of course, it's you that feels bad about it but it shouldn't be."
"It is my fault." She whispered but he caught it.
"Why is it your fault? Talk to me."
"I lead him on. I was having a drink with him and we went to the Bronze and we were having a good time. I was dancing with him and I kissed him and it was nice. He knew it was. It was my fault. If I hadn't been with him all night then it wouldn't have happened."
"Maybe not." He agreed. "But just because it did doesn't mean it was your fault. You never asked him to put something in your drink and take you outside and rape you in an alleyway. Do you understand?"
"I guess so." She shrugged and brushed her eyes again. "I just feel so bad."
"I know you do, but you're not alone you know? You have me. And Giles keeps calling and asking how you are."
She looked up. "He does?"
Angel nodded. "You may not realise it but there are people who care about you. More than you realise."
He leaned across and squeezed her hand. "Don't forget that."
It was the next week when Greg Davies was sentenced to twenty years in prison for the rape of Cordelia Chase and the attempted rape of three other girls. Cordelia's lawyer informed her that it was probable that he wouldn't be offered parole until at least eighteen years had been served.
"I guess I really am safe now, huh?" She told Angel when her lawyer had left.
He nodded. "Yes you are. Want to celebrate?"
"I think I want to go back to school." She told him.
"You do?"
She nodded. "I have to go back eventually. Maybe this is the right time."
"Is that how you feel?"
She nodded. "I think so."
"I can call Giles for you if you want." He offered.
Giles escorted her to her first class and waited while he was sure she was okay. A couple of kids looked at her strangely but overall it was okay. The teacher looked pleased to see her and kept shooting her smiles.
By the end of the class she felt okay but made sure she was out of the room before anyone could say anything to her. She went to the library to see Giles before her next class, but mainly only did that to avoid seeing anyone's looks of pity.
The rest of the day passed pretty quickly and she could get a lift home with Giles.
"Did it go okay this afternoon?" He asked as he drove her back to the mansion.
She nodded. "It was okay. I didn't really talk to anyone. Actually, I avoided everyone."
"Even your friends?"
She nodded. "I didn't want to be looked at like an animal in a zoo. Like I'm a freak. I can't take all the awkward silences and stuttering. Nobody knows what to say to me."
"I'm sure it's as hard for them as it is for you."
"Yeah, 'cause they got raped, didn't they?" She said bitterly.
"That's not what I meant."
"I know."
He pulled up outside the mansion.
"Thanks for the lift."
"I'll pick you up in the morning."
"How did it go?" Angel asked, coming into the living room from the kitchen.
She shrugged and dropped her bag on the floor next to the couch. "Okay I guess."
"Did you see your friends?"
She shook her head. "No, I avoided them."
"Why? You didn't want to see them?"
She shook her head. "I'm not ready to talk to them yet."
"If you don't want to go back tomorrow you don't have to. You can stay home a bit longer."
She shook her head. "I survived one day. I should at least try to last a week."
"If that's what you want."
She nodded. "I think it is."
"Good, I got pasta ready. You want?"
She nodded. "Yeah, thanks."
"So, have you missed much at school?" He moved over to the stove and began stirring the pasta.
"Well, in history we've moved on about a decade."
"Which one are you in now?"
"Eighteen ninety."
"I could help you with that. I was alive then."
She smiled. "Of course you were."
He turned and smiled back at her. "What else?"
"I can catch up on everything else, it will be easy enough."
"Good." He put a bowl of pasta in front of her. "Now eat. We are going out tonight."
"We are? Where?"
"To the movies. There's a new comedy out now that I thought you would like."
"Oh you did?" She tasted the pasta. "That's good."
"Thanks. So, you're up for it?"
She nodded. "Sure, sounds like fun."
The film was funny. Even Angel with his lack of knowledge of popular references found it funny.
She linked his arm as they walked out of the theatre. "Thanks for that."
"It cheered you up?"
She nodded. "Yeah."
"Well good. Do you want to go get a cup of coffee? There's a small place on the way home."
They'd walked to the theatre so they had to walk home. "That sounds good."
"Are you sure you want to go to school tomorrow?" He asked as they walked.
"No." She told him honestly.
He laughed softly. "Stay home if you want."
"Careful, you might become a bad influence." She warned. "No, I think I should go."
"If that's what you want."
"I think it is. But then again, what do I know at the moment?"
"I think you know more than you realise." He told her.
"Why do you think that?"
"You're the one who knows you better than anyone. If you feel comfortable going to school then I think you should rely on your own instincts."
She did go back to school the next day. She spent it pretty much the same as she had the day before, ignoring people and keeping to herself. She'd tried saying hello to Harmony and Aura but it had been tense and awkward. She'd seen Giles at lunch and told him she had an appointment at the counselling office after school so she'd be about half an hour late for her lift home. At first she'd tried to get him to get her out of it but he insisted it might be useful to her so she'd agreed to go. He'd promised to wait for her to take her home.
Author: victoriamartynne
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Spoilers: None.
Summary: In 1998, Angel befriends Cordelia when the going gets tough.
"I thought I was dealing, you know?" She told him later on that night as they sat in the living room.
Cordelia was curled up in the arm chair and Angel was sat on the couch with his feet on the coffee table.
"I thought I was dealing but I guess I'm not." She wiped her red rimmed eyes with a tissue. "Today proved that."
"It takes time. Today doesn't mean you're not dealing. It was just a setback. You need to have setbacks to heal properly. I mean, imagine if you never have setbacks and then ten years down the line you see someone who looks like Greg and you freak out. Imagine how you'd feel then." He told her reasonably.
"I guess." She nodded and pulled the blanket off the side of the chair and covered her bare legs with it. "I would like to eventually have a life."
"You have a life now."
"But not a real one." She wiped her eyes again. "I mean, I can't go out alone 'cause I get scared. I can't stop in on my own 'cause I get scared. I'm scared to be around my friends because I don't know what they'll think of me. I'm practically scared of my own shadow. How is that a life?"
"I think you're pushing yourself too hard." He told her. "It's only been three weeks. You're rushing yourself into feeling okay about what happened. You have to give it time."
"I'm sick of being told I need time." She argued, brushing away tears. "I'm okay when I don't think about it or when I don't see reminders of what happened. But then I do and I feel bad and ashamed all over again."
Angel swung his legs off the coffee table and sat up. "You have nothing, and I mean nothing, to be ashamed about. What happened it not your fault. You are a victim. And of course, it's you that feels bad about it but it shouldn't be."
"It is my fault." She whispered but he caught it.
"Why is it your fault? Talk to me."
"I lead him on. I was having a drink with him and we went to the Bronze and we were having a good time. I was dancing with him and I kissed him and it was nice. He knew it was. It was my fault. If I hadn't been with him all night then it wouldn't have happened."
"Maybe not." He agreed. "But just because it did doesn't mean it was your fault. You never asked him to put something in your drink and take you outside and rape you in an alleyway. Do you understand?"
"I guess so." She shrugged and brushed her eyes again. "I just feel so bad."
"I know you do, but you're not alone you know? You have me. And Giles keeps calling and asking how you are."
She looked up. "He does?"
Angel nodded. "You may not realise it but there are people who care about you. More than you realise."
He leaned across and squeezed her hand. "Don't forget that."
It was the next week when Greg Davies was sentenced to twenty years in prison for the rape of Cordelia Chase and the attempted rape of three other girls. Cordelia's lawyer informed her that it was probable that he wouldn't be offered parole until at least eighteen years had been served.
"I guess I really am safe now, huh?" She told Angel when her lawyer had left.
He nodded. "Yes you are. Want to celebrate?"
"I think I want to go back to school." She told him.
"You do?"
She nodded. "I have to go back eventually. Maybe this is the right time."
"Is that how you feel?"
She nodded. "I think so."
"I can call Giles for you if you want." He offered.
Giles escorted her to her first class and waited while he was sure she was okay. A couple of kids looked at her strangely but overall it was okay. The teacher looked pleased to see her and kept shooting her smiles.
By the end of the class she felt okay but made sure she was out of the room before anyone could say anything to her. She went to the library to see Giles before her next class, but mainly only did that to avoid seeing anyone's looks of pity.
The rest of the day passed pretty quickly and she could get a lift home with Giles.
"Did it go okay this afternoon?" He asked as he drove her back to the mansion.
She nodded. "It was okay. I didn't really talk to anyone. Actually, I avoided everyone."
"Even your friends?"
She nodded. "I didn't want to be looked at like an animal in a zoo. Like I'm a freak. I can't take all the awkward silences and stuttering. Nobody knows what to say to me."
"I'm sure it's as hard for them as it is for you."
"Yeah, 'cause they got raped, didn't they?" She said bitterly.
"That's not what I meant."
"I know."
He pulled up outside the mansion.
"Thanks for the lift."
"I'll pick you up in the morning."
"How did it go?" Angel asked, coming into the living room from the kitchen.
She shrugged and dropped her bag on the floor next to the couch. "Okay I guess."
"Did you see your friends?"
She shook her head. "No, I avoided them."
"Why? You didn't want to see them?"
She shook her head. "I'm not ready to talk to them yet."
"If you don't want to go back tomorrow you don't have to. You can stay home a bit longer."
She shook her head. "I survived one day. I should at least try to last a week."
"If that's what you want."
She nodded. "I think it is."
"Good, I got pasta ready. You want?"
She nodded. "Yeah, thanks."
"So, have you missed much at school?" He moved over to the stove and began stirring the pasta.
"Well, in history we've moved on about a decade."
"Which one are you in now?"
"Eighteen ninety."
"I could help you with that. I was alive then."
She smiled. "Of course you were."
He turned and smiled back at her. "What else?"
"I can catch up on everything else, it will be easy enough."
"Good." He put a bowl of pasta in front of her. "Now eat. We are going out tonight."
"We are? Where?"
"To the movies. There's a new comedy out now that I thought you would like."
"Oh you did?" She tasted the pasta. "That's good."
"Thanks. So, you're up for it?"
She nodded. "Sure, sounds like fun."
The film was funny. Even Angel with his lack of knowledge of popular references found it funny.
She linked his arm as they walked out of the theatre. "Thanks for that."
"It cheered you up?"
She nodded. "Yeah."
"Well good. Do you want to go get a cup of coffee? There's a small place on the way home."
They'd walked to the theatre so they had to walk home. "That sounds good."
"Are you sure you want to go to school tomorrow?" He asked as they walked.
"No." She told him honestly.
He laughed softly. "Stay home if you want."
"Careful, you might become a bad influence." She warned. "No, I think I should go."
"If that's what you want."
"I think it is. But then again, what do I know at the moment?"
"I think you know more than you realise." He told her.
"Why do you think that?"
"You're the one who knows you better than anyone. If you feel comfortable going to school then I think you should rely on your own instincts."
She did go back to school the next day. She spent it pretty much the same as she had the day before, ignoring people and keeping to herself. She'd tried saying hello to Harmony and Aura but it had been tense and awkward. She'd seen Giles at lunch and told him she had an appointment at the counselling office after school so she'd be about half an hour late for her lift home. At first she'd tried to get him to get her out of it but he insisted it might be useful to her so she'd agreed to go. He'd promised to wait for her to take her home.
