Reading the Truth

Dear Journal, Sept. 21, 1900

I'm soo happy that I have recieved you. Spot, my best friend, with the help of my other friends, bought you for my birthday. I am seventeen today. I din't know what I would have done if I hadn't met the newsies. They are life savers. They are my heroes!

I'll write later,

Journey

I looked up to the faces that I have known for four years.

"Youse like yer present?" Spot asked.

"I love it, its da best present eva. Thank you." I walked around Tibby's hugging all the newsies. I felt so loved but so alone. After we were done with Tibby's we walked back to the Lodging House. I held my journal up against my chest. I felt an arm around my waist and looked over to see Race's face. I put my head on his shoulder for i was a little shorter than Race. I stood 5'1 with blonde hair that went to my waist and wearing newsie attire.

"Youse okay Journey?"

"Yeah Ise love da present."

"Dats not what I asked ya." I lifted my head.

"Oh yeah."I said with a giggle. "But I am fine." He nodded and let go of me to catch up with some other newsies.

"Ise saw youse write in dere." I jumped at the voice but soon realized that it was only Spot. He came to my side with his hands in his pockets. "What did youse write?"

"Its called a journal." I looked down at the book. "But Ise guess you can read da first entry." I handed it to him and he quickly opened it.

"We're heroes?" I nodded. "Ise knew Ise was a hero but da rest. I don't know maybe dem." I slightly punched him in the shoulder.

"Youse all are." He handed my journal back to me. "Youse not ever going to read dis witout me permission, youse got it?"

"Yeah Ise got it."

"Ise don't tink youse do. Ise know youse betta."

"Yeah youse right." We finally arrived at the Lodging House. I quickly went upstairs and jumped on Race's bed.

"Excuse me boirthday goil, but what do youse tink yose doing?" He said with a smile.

"Sitting." I said with a big grin on my face.

"Well can youse do youse sitting somewhere else?" I looked around and saw the empty bunks that I could sit on.

"Dere's no room ta sit anywhere else." Race looked around and gave me a confused face.

"What are youse talking bout? Dere's beds all ova dat are empty." He put a cigar in his mouth while he was taking off his shoes.

"Your right." I grabbed the cigar out of his mouth dropping my journal on his bed and ran. Race stood up chasing me with a show on one foot untied. I ran into the washroom and right into the showers. I closed the curtain and turned the water on. I held the cigar up so that it wouldn't get wet. Race opened the curtain. "Aaaa Race! Ise taking a shower!" Spot ran into the washroom.

"What da hell youse doing Journey?" Spot asked me.

"Ise was taking a shower wit me clothes on and den Race opened my curtain. "Spot shook his head and pointed to the cigar in my hand. "And I...I was going ta smoke da cigar while Ise shampoo." Race turned off the water and grabbed his cigar. he quickly walked away. I sat in the shower with Spot still staring at me. "Ise going to sleep in here one of these days. It looks fun. And plus Ise already wet. Hey! Lets go outside!" I said as I stood up.

"Youse going to get sick!" I laughed. I walked past him with my squeaky shoes. I walked into the bunkroom and all the guys started to laugh at me. I wonder what I looked like. Drenched in water with my clothes and shoes on. I walked over to Race's bed and picked up my journal and walked out and down the stairs. I walked out of the Lodging House and sat underneath a street lamp. i opened my journal and took my pencil out of my hair.

Dear Journal,

Its til my birthday. Now i'm going to tell you stuff that no one should ever read. ABout four years ago I became a newsie. I had no where else to go. I lived in Brooklyn and thats how I got to know Spot. Well anyways Spot is my best friend and I used to feel like I could tell him anything. Now I feel like I can't. I feel so alone. Like there is no one there for me. I know thats silly but thats how I feel. Some days I feel so...unloved, that i think of killing myself. I know people care for me but that doesn't change how I feel.

"Hey Journal!" I looked up and saw Blink leaning on the post.

"Telll me dat youse didn't read anytin Ise wrote!"

"Don't worries, Spot wanted me to tell ya dat youse should come inside."

"Well den whyse didn't he come down?"

"Ise don't know."

"Well den...bye." He looked at me and walked into the Lodging House. I went back to writing.

My heart hurts. It aches whenever I talk to someone. Especially Spot. I love him so much and he doesn't know. Actually no one knows. I just wish that he could have the same feelings towards me. I also feel like some of the newsies don't like me and they are only my friend because Spots my best friend. I shouldn't even call him that. I mean how could i be best friends with a person that is so egolostical? And when Spots worried about me he sends other newsies to tell me. I want to yeall at him to stop. I don't need any attention. Thats how I came up with a plan.

"Hey." I looked over adn it was Spot. I kepy writing.

I will tell you about my plan later

Love ya

Journey

I quickly closed my hournal and looked at Spot.

"What do youse want?"

"Ta get youse inside, youse going to get real sick."

"And hopefully die." I mumbled.

"What did youse say?"

"Nothing." I stood up, went inside and I quickly changed out of my wet clothes. I went to my bed and looked for my journal. "Wheres my journal?" I lifted up my pillow and my blanket. I looked at all the newsies. "Where is it?" I looked around and saw Spot reading it.