Ok this is a good old parody of POTC. The idea came to Christy when she was
eating at a taco place. Right, so everyone's names are the same (coz we
couldn't think of any witty taco themed names) but the names of the places
and ships are changed. Oh yes, if you read, please do review, even if you
don't like it. Oh and erm, there is some swearing, but this IS about
pirates so I think you'll be ok. Yep, anyway enjoy! (oh yah, tacos are
pirates and burritos are "good respectable" people, soft tacos are people
kinda like Will, that's all)
I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean, and I don't own any tacos. *sigh*
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A lone Burritish ship sails through a foggy sea. At first glance, there is no one there, but if you look carefully you can make out a lone burrito standing on the deck, "...We are spicy and crunchy yo ho, yo ho, yo ho, a taco's life for me"(just take a second to sing that out loud), suddenly, a piece of tortilla (hand) reaches out and grabs her! "Cursed tacos sail these waters, do yeh want the bring em down on us?" Gibbs, the soft taco who grabbed her, said. "That will do Gibbs." Norrington said snobbily. "S bad luck to be singin' abou' tacos, with this unnatural fog about, mark my words!". Norrington looks annoyed, "Riiiight" he said turning to go to the lower deck, but then trips. "Oww that fucking piece of shit!! Why in bloody hell would ANYone put a fucking piece of shit like that in here??" Norrington swore. Suddenly, Captain Jack Sparrow scrambles on deck and picks up his hat (an overly large piece of lettuce), "That would be MINE, you bloody piece of crap!". Everyone looks shocked for a moment but before they can react he is gone.
"Eh, I'm worried about the effect this talk will have on my daughter." Head Burrito Swann said, looking at Norrington in particular, who was still on the deck, rubbing his face. "Actually, I find this fucking talk fascinating, ah piece of shit corset!" Elizabeth the young burrito said. Everyone stared at the child, with a surprised expression. "You see?!" Head Burrito Swann said. "Well MAYBE if Jack Sparrow didn't leave his crap on our ship..." Norrington said in an undertone
"Its bad luck to 'ave a woman on board, even a miniature one." Gibbs said. He promptly hopped toward the lower deck but tripped over Norrington's still form " I tooold youuuu!!" Gibbs cried even as he fell. There was a resounding splash and another yell "hey! There's a soft taco in the water with me!" Gibbs yelled. There was a collective shudder and a few screams of "AHH MY VIRGIN MIND!!", "NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERVY PEOPLE!!" he said, "I think he's shipwrecked!" . " No!" Norrington said sarcastically "Wait! Yes he is!" Said a stupid crew member who had not gotten the sarcasm "Look! There's 'is ship!!" he pointed out on the horizon and there was the wreckage of the ship, still ablaze. "It was those god damned tacos!!" Gibbs yelled up "NOW PULL US UP!! I think I'm getting hypothermia!". At this statement the crew got to work and began to hoist them up the side of the ship. "Ow! Wood is hard! Pain!!" Gibbs complained as he hit the side of the ship with each pull.
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After they finally pulled them up to the deck, Head Burrito Swann put Elizabeth in charge of the stowaway soft taco. "No she'll kill 'im!!" Gibbs protested, but he was in her care already. While the crew went out to the other ship to look for survivors, Elizabeth began to stroke the soft taco's head. "GAHH!!" He yelled waking up "Who in bloody hell are you???" "Elizabeth Swann" "Will Turner" he gasped before collapsing again. "I'm watching over you Will." She said. Oh great, I'm doomed, he thought before blacking out. My, he is HOT! Hmmm? What's this? , she wondered, picking up a chili (one of those ones you get with tacos and burritos at certain restaurants) on a chain. It was oddly heavy and it had a skull engraved into it. "You're a t- You're a taco!!" She said horrified. "Has he said anything? Head Burrito Swann asked, "His name is William Turner, that's all I've found out."-----
Suddenly, a much larger and prettier burrito opens her eyes and gets up. She walks over to a small end table and takes out a tray filled with stuff , goes to the back of the drawer and pressed a secret latch and it reveals a dusty chili pepper. She takes it out and puts it on her neck. "AAHH IT BURNS!!" She screams, for the chili pepper's juices burned her skin. "AHHH!!!" "Elizabeth? Is something wrong?" Head Burrito Swann asked from behind her door. "NOTHING!!" she said stuffing the pepper into her shirt "Its just the, erm, RATS!! OWW MY BOOBS!!". She regretted this as soon as she said it. It set the entire house ablaze with fresh screams. "AHH RATS!!! EEEEKKK!!" was probably the most popular comment. And it was in this state of panic that the soft taco Will Turner found the house. "Erm, what's going on?" He asked a distressed maid, who was waving around a broom. Getting no answer he continued on until he found Elizabeth. "What is going on? Nice dress, where'd you get it?" He asked. "Oh well, I found it under my fathers bed so I decided to just try it on-eh, sorry, oh yeah, the house, I said I saw rats". He raised an eyebrow at this. "So?". Elizabeth only shrugged.
"Come on Elizabeth! We have to get out and let the experts deal with this severe problem!" Head Burrito Swann said dashing down the stairs, "In the mean time we will go to Norrington's promotion ceremony!!". "But what about the sword I made?" Will asked halfheartedly. " No time! Come!". And so as everyone ran out the door in a river of people Will was swept out.
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Out on the port, a taco rides on the mast of a ship, looking quite proud. Suddenly, he falls over onto the deck. "I see there's a leak" he says to himself and picks up a bucket and begins to scoop out water. "AH! Me hat!" he says as his overly large piece of lettuce falls off his head into the water. "I can't reach it! Arrgh!!" he gives up and dives into the water after his hat. "Swim swim!". Once he reaches his hat he turns to find his ship is gone! It finally went under, he thought sadly. He turned around and swam back only to run into his boat. "Ah!". He scrambled onto the deck and climbed up the mast dropping his bucket.
As the lone figure sailed into port he was steadily sinking, until he reached the dock and stepped off. "Ay you!! it's a shilling to tie up yer boat! And I shall need your name." Said an uptight looking burrito. The taco looked at him and continued to walk, unaware that he had made another enemy. "Bloody tacos." the Burrito said scowling.
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Meanwhile, at Norrington's promotion ceremony Norrington was effectively pissed off as he had no sword to do his cool trick things. " What do you mean you don't have it?" he said through clenched teeth. "Well, you see there were rats..."said Elizabeth in a feeble attempt to pacify him. "That will do! Very well, because of your carelessness I am not going to be able to do the most boring part of the ceremony." Norrington said. Outside the door, there are a few soft hisses that sounded suspiciously like "Yes!". They all left, and Norrington went out into the crowd thing and began his long boring acceptance speech. The crowd was asleep by the first sentence.
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Meanwhile at the port, the taco saunters over to a separate dock. "Ay you!! This dock is off limits to all fools!" said one of the burritos who had been asleep. "Then it's a very good thing I am not a fool then. Hey, this a good ship here but do you really need 2?" the taco said gesturing towards a ship about 100 yards away. "Aye, the Fancy Burrito is the dauntless in these waters but no ship can match the Incaceptor for speed." The red coat said proudly. "I know of one, it's supposed to be very fast, the Black-eyed Pea." The taco replied. Meanwhile the burrito's companion, who was still asleep, let out a grunt and rolled off onto the dock. " AHHHH!!!" he rolled down off the crate he had been on and over to the dock, gathering speed as he went. "I'll help!! You, stay where you are." The burrito said menacingly and went off to help his friend. "Aye, I'll stay where I am, on yer ship!! Bwahaha!" the taco cackled while climbing the ramp onto the ship.
Once the burritos had gathered themselves they turned their attention to the deck of the ship they were supposed to be gaurding. "Hey you!! you don't have permission to be up there!!! Get down now!!!" the burritos said, scrambling up the ship's ramp. "But, it's such a pretty boat! Ship! Ship!" Captain taco said waving his 'hands' around. "What are you doing here?" one of the soldiers asked "and no lies!!" his companion supplied jabbing his fork (sharp speargun thing) at the taco.
"Do I really have to tell?" the taco asked (sorry for the repetiveness of saying "the taco" all the time, but his character hasn't really been introduced yet, but soon grasshopper!) " Yes you do!" "and no lies!!" Mr. Taco sighed, he knew he was in for a long day. "Very well, I want to steal the bloody ship, savvy?" the officers stared openmouthed at him for a minute. "NO LIES!!"
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Ah, we've enjoyed our time together but alas it must come to an end. Until next chapter, goodbye. REVIEW!!! Yay!
I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean, and I don't own any tacos. *sigh*
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A lone Burritish ship sails through a foggy sea. At first glance, there is no one there, but if you look carefully you can make out a lone burrito standing on the deck, "...We are spicy and crunchy yo ho, yo ho, yo ho, a taco's life for me"(just take a second to sing that out loud), suddenly, a piece of tortilla (hand) reaches out and grabs her! "Cursed tacos sail these waters, do yeh want the bring em down on us?" Gibbs, the soft taco who grabbed her, said. "That will do Gibbs." Norrington said snobbily. "S bad luck to be singin' abou' tacos, with this unnatural fog about, mark my words!". Norrington looks annoyed, "Riiiight" he said turning to go to the lower deck, but then trips. "Oww that fucking piece of shit!! Why in bloody hell would ANYone put a fucking piece of shit like that in here??" Norrington swore. Suddenly, Captain Jack Sparrow scrambles on deck and picks up his hat (an overly large piece of lettuce), "That would be MINE, you bloody piece of crap!". Everyone looks shocked for a moment but before they can react he is gone.
"Eh, I'm worried about the effect this talk will have on my daughter." Head Burrito Swann said, looking at Norrington in particular, who was still on the deck, rubbing his face. "Actually, I find this fucking talk fascinating, ah piece of shit corset!" Elizabeth the young burrito said. Everyone stared at the child, with a surprised expression. "You see?!" Head Burrito Swann said. "Well MAYBE if Jack Sparrow didn't leave his crap on our ship..." Norrington said in an undertone
"Its bad luck to 'ave a woman on board, even a miniature one." Gibbs said. He promptly hopped toward the lower deck but tripped over Norrington's still form " I tooold youuuu!!" Gibbs cried even as he fell. There was a resounding splash and another yell "hey! There's a soft taco in the water with me!" Gibbs yelled. There was a collective shudder and a few screams of "AHH MY VIRGIN MIND!!", "NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERVY PEOPLE!!" he said, "I think he's shipwrecked!" . " No!" Norrington said sarcastically "Wait! Yes he is!" Said a stupid crew member who had not gotten the sarcasm "Look! There's 'is ship!!" he pointed out on the horizon and there was the wreckage of the ship, still ablaze. "It was those god damned tacos!!" Gibbs yelled up "NOW PULL US UP!! I think I'm getting hypothermia!". At this statement the crew got to work and began to hoist them up the side of the ship. "Ow! Wood is hard! Pain!!" Gibbs complained as he hit the side of the ship with each pull.
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After they finally pulled them up to the deck, Head Burrito Swann put Elizabeth in charge of the stowaway soft taco. "No she'll kill 'im!!" Gibbs protested, but he was in her care already. While the crew went out to the other ship to look for survivors, Elizabeth began to stroke the soft taco's head. "GAHH!!" He yelled waking up "Who in bloody hell are you???" "Elizabeth Swann" "Will Turner" he gasped before collapsing again. "I'm watching over you Will." She said. Oh great, I'm doomed, he thought before blacking out. My, he is HOT! Hmmm? What's this? , she wondered, picking up a chili (one of those ones you get with tacos and burritos at certain restaurants) on a chain. It was oddly heavy and it had a skull engraved into it. "You're a t- You're a taco!!" She said horrified. "Has he said anything? Head Burrito Swann asked, "His name is William Turner, that's all I've found out."-----
Suddenly, a much larger and prettier burrito opens her eyes and gets up. She walks over to a small end table and takes out a tray filled with stuff , goes to the back of the drawer and pressed a secret latch and it reveals a dusty chili pepper. She takes it out and puts it on her neck. "AAHH IT BURNS!!" She screams, for the chili pepper's juices burned her skin. "AHHH!!!" "Elizabeth? Is something wrong?" Head Burrito Swann asked from behind her door. "NOTHING!!" she said stuffing the pepper into her shirt "Its just the, erm, RATS!! OWW MY BOOBS!!". She regretted this as soon as she said it. It set the entire house ablaze with fresh screams. "AHH RATS!!! EEEEKKK!!" was probably the most popular comment. And it was in this state of panic that the soft taco Will Turner found the house. "Erm, what's going on?" He asked a distressed maid, who was waving around a broom. Getting no answer he continued on until he found Elizabeth. "What is going on? Nice dress, where'd you get it?" He asked. "Oh well, I found it under my fathers bed so I decided to just try it on-eh, sorry, oh yeah, the house, I said I saw rats". He raised an eyebrow at this. "So?". Elizabeth only shrugged.
"Come on Elizabeth! We have to get out and let the experts deal with this severe problem!" Head Burrito Swann said dashing down the stairs, "In the mean time we will go to Norrington's promotion ceremony!!". "But what about the sword I made?" Will asked halfheartedly. " No time! Come!". And so as everyone ran out the door in a river of people Will was swept out.
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Out on the port, a taco rides on the mast of a ship, looking quite proud. Suddenly, he falls over onto the deck. "I see there's a leak" he says to himself and picks up a bucket and begins to scoop out water. "AH! Me hat!" he says as his overly large piece of lettuce falls off his head into the water. "I can't reach it! Arrgh!!" he gives up and dives into the water after his hat. "Swim swim!". Once he reaches his hat he turns to find his ship is gone! It finally went under, he thought sadly. He turned around and swam back only to run into his boat. "Ah!". He scrambled onto the deck and climbed up the mast dropping his bucket.
As the lone figure sailed into port he was steadily sinking, until he reached the dock and stepped off. "Ay you!! it's a shilling to tie up yer boat! And I shall need your name." Said an uptight looking burrito. The taco looked at him and continued to walk, unaware that he had made another enemy. "Bloody tacos." the Burrito said scowling.
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Meanwhile, at Norrington's promotion ceremony Norrington was effectively pissed off as he had no sword to do his cool trick things. " What do you mean you don't have it?" he said through clenched teeth. "Well, you see there were rats..."said Elizabeth in a feeble attempt to pacify him. "That will do! Very well, because of your carelessness I am not going to be able to do the most boring part of the ceremony." Norrington said. Outside the door, there are a few soft hisses that sounded suspiciously like "Yes!". They all left, and Norrington went out into the crowd thing and began his long boring acceptance speech. The crowd was asleep by the first sentence.
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Meanwhile at the port, the taco saunters over to a separate dock. "Ay you!! This dock is off limits to all fools!" said one of the burritos who had been asleep. "Then it's a very good thing I am not a fool then. Hey, this a good ship here but do you really need 2?" the taco said gesturing towards a ship about 100 yards away. "Aye, the Fancy Burrito is the dauntless in these waters but no ship can match the Incaceptor for speed." The red coat said proudly. "I know of one, it's supposed to be very fast, the Black-eyed Pea." The taco replied. Meanwhile the burrito's companion, who was still asleep, let out a grunt and rolled off onto the dock. " AHHHH!!!" he rolled down off the crate he had been on and over to the dock, gathering speed as he went. "I'll help!! You, stay where you are." The burrito said menacingly and went off to help his friend. "Aye, I'll stay where I am, on yer ship!! Bwahaha!" the taco cackled while climbing the ramp onto the ship.
Once the burritos had gathered themselves they turned their attention to the deck of the ship they were supposed to be gaurding. "Hey you!! you don't have permission to be up there!!! Get down now!!!" the burritos said, scrambling up the ship's ramp. "But, it's such a pretty boat! Ship! Ship!" Captain taco said waving his 'hands' around. "What are you doing here?" one of the soldiers asked "and no lies!!" his companion supplied jabbing his fork (sharp speargun thing) at the taco.
"Do I really have to tell?" the taco asked (sorry for the repetiveness of saying "the taco" all the time, but his character hasn't really been introduced yet, but soon grasshopper!) " Yes you do!" "and no lies!!" Mr. Taco sighed, he knew he was in for a long day. "Very well, I want to steal the bloody ship, savvy?" the officers stared openmouthed at him for a minute. "NO LIES!!"
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Ah, we've enjoyed our time together but alas it must come to an end. Until next chapter, goodbye. REVIEW!!! Yay!
