ACT I, Scene 4
----The platform.
(Enter Kelly, Shelly, and Dave)
KELLY: Damn! It's coooold!
SHELLY: Just a tidbit nippy, yes.
KELLY: What time is it?
SHELLY: Um, somewhere before twelve.
DAVE: Nah, it's after. I'm sure I heard the clock strike.
SHELLY: Really? I didn't hear it. Well, either way, it's almost time for him to appear.
(some really bad trumpets are heard from backstage)
KELLY: Ugh, who said TJ and Jared could play the stage cued music?
MELISSA: (backstage) No one. They just decided to replace the tape we had cued up.
KELLY: ARGH!! (throws up her hands in defeat)
SHELLY: OK, what do the trumpets mean?
KELLY: The *king* is having an up all night party. In other words – while the king is shtooping my mom, the rest of the kingdom will be eating, drinking, dancing, and God knows what else all night long.
SHELLY: Is that a custom?
KELLY: Unfortunately, yes, it is. However, people are more concerned about the custom being broken rather than actually following it. Other countries think we're nothing but drunks, pigs, and any other detestable thing because of this so-called tradition. Sometimes I hate being Danish.
(Lauren drops from the ceiling)
SHELLY: ACK! There it is!
KELLY: Whether you're good or evil, I will speak to you as if you were my father, the king. Bring me with you. I want to know why you're still roaming the earth! What should I do?
(Lauren 'beckons' Kelly)
SHELLY: I think it wants you to go with it… (gulp)… Alone.
DAVE: It wants you to go with it to someplace where no one can see you. I don't like it. Don't go with him.
SHELLY: Yeah, don't go.
KELLY: It won't speak otherwise, so I have to go to find out what it wants.
SHELLY: No! Don't!
KELLY: Don't worry. I'll be perfectly fine. It still wants me to go, so I'm going.
SHELLY: But it could tempt you with sin! With evil deeds that seem good! It may make you go mad! Somehow it will capture your soul and bring it to the underworld!
KELLY: It wants me to go. Go on then, spirit. I'll follow.
DAVE: What, are you nuts? (grabs shoulder)
KELLY: I wouldn't be touching me right now if I were you. (glares back at his hand, then into his face… he lets go)
SHELLY: Hello! Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!
KELLY: My destiny awaits, and I WON'T turn it away.
(Kelly goes over to Lauren, holds on for her life, and they're both lifted up… THUD!)
KELLY and LAUREN: Ow~~!
SHELLY: He's too into this.
DAVE: Should we follow him, see where they're going?
SHELLY: But what would that accomplish? …… (glances at script) Wait a minute… *He* gets the 'state of Denmark' line? Wha…what--?
DAVE: Hehehe.
SHELLY: (glare) Don't make me sick May on you.
CHIBI-MAY: (backstage, chained to a stake, foaming at the mouth, growling like a dog)
***NOTE: Chibi-May is not – we repeat, NOT – the real May. *wink*
DAVE: (gulp!)
KELLY: (off stage) Just let Dave say the line!
DAVE: No… If she wants to say it, she can have the line…
KELLY: DAVE!! JUST SAY IT!!
DAVE: (hurried yelling) Something is rotten in the state of Denmark!
SHELLY: Let's hope everything goes well.
DAVE: No, let's follow them.
(exit)
