A/N: I do not own BtVS, WWE, or the song, Half a Heart Tattoo by Jennifer Hanson. A little angst, but not a lot.
She was touching up her makeup
I was standing next in line
I couldn't help but notice
'Neath those powder room lights
It was china red outlined in black
On the left side of her shoulder
In plain view
I just had to ask, "Hey, what's with that half a heart tattoo?"
I was waiting for my turn at the mirror, impatiently of course. My friends always snort when someone tells me to be patient. As Xander told me long ago, and Matt echoed recently, "Girl, telling you to be patient is like telling a little kid not to eat his bag of candy on Halloween. It'll never happen."
As harsh as it sounds, it's the truth. So there I was trying so hard not to tell her to get her ass in gear so I could have my turn, when I noticed it.
It was half a heart and located on her left shoulder. Her dark brown hair was barely brushing it.
I wondered if I should say anything, and finally settled for, "Hey, girl, what's with the half a heart tattoo?"
She glanced at me through the mirror
And just started to laugh
She said, "I know this looks funny
She glanced back, still doing her makeup. "Never expected to see you here."
I shrugged. "Yeah, well I never expected to see such a strange tattoo on your shoulder."
She started to laugh then, a little hysterically maybe, but still laughing. "It looks funny, huh?"
I didn't say anything, just offered a half smile. Contrary to popular opinion, I do know that sometimes, just sometimes, that it's better to be quiet than to offer a statement that the other person might think of killing you for. Learned that lesson the hard way, but I learned it at least.
But there is another half.
And its china red outlined in black on the right side of his shoulder.
Last I knew
Yeah, somewhere out there is a match to this
Half a heart tattoo."
"Its china red, just like mine," she offered, "a perfect match in every way."
"Is he your perfect match?"
Her eyes closed for a minute, pain etched across that face. "No. I thought he was though."
I wanted to tell her that it would get better, but I couldn't offer that reassurance. "Life goes on, you know. Even if the pain doesn't seem to ever lessen, it does."
"Why do I have a feeling that you're going to tell me that you're speaking out of experience?" Her eyes were sad as they turned on me.
I let my eyes meet hers, and let my shields drop. My eyes which were so often cold and frozen suddenly showed the pain. "Talk about the pain. It might help."
Well the last I heard some redhead
Caught his eye in New Orleans
And before that it was a blonde in Baton Rouge
I know there's at least a dozen gals out sporting one of these
Thinking that they're the only fool
That he left with a half a heart tattoo."
"I thought I was the only one he'd ever lured into his bed," she was still applying her makeup, but at least she'd moved over so that I could touch up mine.
"But you weren't." It wasn't a question; I knew the answer as well as I knew my own name.
She snorted. "Nope. He ended up leaving me in San Antonio. There were a whole string of women out in Louisiana. A redhead in New Orleans caught his eye; I know that much from his daughter, Ally. She's thirteen and shouldn't have to grow up in that environment. There was a blonde in Baton Rouge, before the redhead. And a dozen others either before or after me."
Well girl you got my sympathy
I knew a guy like that
"I knew a guy like that." Okay, so that was understating it so much that I might as well have said that my boss was a royal asshole, or that the End of Days was hard on us all.
"Sure you did." She turned her eyes on me then, and growled, "Trust me when I say that you didn't. You're too perfect to fall in love with a dude like that."
"You have my sympathy," I insisted, "or rather my empathy."
I said, "You ain't gonna believe this."
Then I pulled my jacket back
"Doesn't empathy mean that you went through the same thing?" she frowned.
I caught her eye in the mirror. And then I pulled my jacket back. "I did go through the same thing."
"No fucking way!" she swore. Suddenly she blushed. "I am so sorry for cussing, it's just that…"
"Yeah, its china red outlined in black on the left side of my shoulder.
Still fairly new.
I guess there's just a whole mess of us
With a half a heart tattoo."
"I understand. It's older than yours," I told her gently, "but it's still fairly new."
"How new?" Those fathomless depths were meeting mine again.
"After the battle, I was pissed as hell, and to quote Faith, 'Just as horny.'"
"So???"
"So I went to Vancouver. I have no idea why, but I did. I met this guy that I really thought was the best, and his nine year old daughter. I climbed in bed with him, and ended up getting the tattoo the next day."
"Then what happened?" she asked eagerly. I knew that she didn't mean to sound so eager, but there's just a sort of relief a girl gets from hearing someone else's tale.
"He told me three days later that I was just a quick lay." I expelled a deep breath. "I told him that he didn't mean a thing to me, and to be honest, he didn't. But Als did. Ally and I still talk every night and whenever we're in the same city, we get together. Gives her some time to talk to a woman, y'know?"
"Then what happened to Hunter?"
Well the last I heard he moved in
With some dancer from L.A.
But I'm betting that won't last a week or two
He loves them long enough to leave his mark
And he's so good they never have a clue
"He was living with some dancer in L.A. this time last week." I gazed at her with concern.
"Yours is newer than mine," I stated the obvious.
"No shit, Sherlock," my high school friend snarled.
"No, yours is years newer. You've only had it a couple of months, haven't you?"
"Almost four," she retorted.
"The Game doesn't play to enjoy the game," I sighed. "He plays to win and then he leaves them. Don't ever even entertain the idea of going back."
"I won't," she blinked back the tears. "I promise."
'til they're stuck with a half a heart tattoo
So ladies make sure that guy standing next to you
Ain't wearing no half a heart tattoo
I chuckled, "You're as tenacious as ever, Cordelia."
"Finally using words bigger than those of a three year old, are we?" She smiled fondly at me.
"I happen to like big words," I protested. At her raised eyebrow, I continued, "But sharing a room with Jeff Hardy will force anyone to learn them, whether they want to or not."
"Jeff Hardy?" Cordy practically squealed.
"Yeah," I gaze at her as I turn to leave. "With all the potentials out there, I finally got a chance to figure out who I was. And I figured out that I like violence, which was kinda a given, but I couldn't survive without it. So I went looking for employment at Titan Towers. They took one look at me, and decided that they wanted me as a diva. I've been wresting for damn bear all four years I've had this tattoo."
"I'm glad you finally found a dream, Buffy," she leaned over to hug me with a tender smile.
"Have a good life, Queen C," I told her as I walked out of the lavatory.
"You too, Buffy. You, too."
I slipped back into my seat at the table with an apologetic smile. "Long line," I told them.
Jeff was the only one who noticed that my jacket stayed off. Normally, unless I was with him or my lover, I covered up the tattoo.
As the host finally arrived, Matt showed up. I could see Cordy at the door, her smile sweet and sad.
With Matt's kiss, I finally let go of the past.
A/N: Please, please review! Have a good week everyone.
