Part 16

Clash of the Titans

By Bobcat

Disclaimer:  I didn't do nothing,' ya hear?

Author's Note: As of Part 15, this story has shifted well outside the original Majin Buu saga.  So, one can no longer use the DBZ anime to predict the next event.  Just a warning.

               Goku was confused and worried.  Phil and Vegeta each had a black M in the center of their forehead, indicating that they were under Babadi's control.  What concerned the Saiyan was that the power boost Vegeta had received had placed him at a higher level than Goku.  Also, this Phil had become more powerful; not enough to be a threat to Goku, but he had long ago given up attempting to read Phil's power level.  He didn't understand how Babadi's magic worked, but he thought that he might be able to reach them.

               "Vegeta!  Don't do this!  Think of Bulma!  Think of your Trunks!"

               Babadi was chortling evilly.  The increased gravity still had him lying prone, but things were looking up (figuratively, if not literally).  With these two under my control, I may not even need Majin Buu!  "Fool!  They are mine now!  Phil, Vegeta, destroy him!"

               Phil shook his head.  "Why would I want to hurt Goku?  He's a nice guy!"

               "What?  You can't resist me!  Nothing can break my power!"

               Phil chuckled.  "There are two powers greater than yours.  First, there is the Force, a field of energy that unites all living and nonliving things.  But, even greater than that, is my ego."  Phil pocketed his lightsaber and floated over to Goku.  "Oh, and thanks for the power-up!"

               The wizard was fuming.  "Vegeta, kill them!  Now!"

               Vegeta smirked.  "With pleasure."

               It was at this moment that Kaio-shin burst in.  He had felt Babadi's magic at work, and was distressed to see that both Phil and Vegeta sported the M.  "I'm too late!"  The Supreme Kai saw the wizard.  "But it isn't too late to destroy you once and for all!"  He shot a Chi bolt at Babadi, but Vegeta moved to intercept the attack.

               Phil pulled a small device from his pocket, flipped a switch, and then returned the object.  "I just turned off my manna scrambler.  Babadi, I know your type.  You're too cowardly to risk yourself, so if you want to see a fight, I'd suggest you teleport us elsewhere."

               "You've played right into my hands!  Papparapar!"  As the warriors disappeared, Babadi heard the voice of Phil in his mind saying, "Who has played into whose hands?" With a swirl of dust and energy, Vegeta, Goku, Phil and Kaio-shin were all nearly ten miles away.  They were in an isolated badlands.  There was little plant growth, and large mesas dotted the landscape.

               Vegeta recognized the place immediately.  "Kakorot, this is where we fought our last battle.  How fitting."

               "So it is."

               Kaio-shin had assumed a fighting stance and faced Phil.  "Goku, I shall take this traitor.  You fight Vegeta!"

               Phil snorted disdainfully.  "Relax, I'm not under Babadi's power."

               "Huh?  But your forehead…"

               "Oh, that?  Just ignore it.  I did it for the power boost.  I'm too thickheaded for him to control.  I'm on your side."

               "Oh."

               "Now look, Gohan is going to need your help.  Fly back to Babadi's ship and be ready for Majin Buu to be reawakened."

"What?  We've got to stop them!  As they lose energy in battle, more power goes to Majin Buu!"

"That's like trying to stop a hurricane.  Look, when these two go at it, there's gonna be a huge influx of energy.  The faster you move, the better the odds that you can stop Babadi.  Without his influence, Buu might not be as destructive.  Got it?"

               Unused to taking commands, Kaio-shin almost disagreed.  However, he saw the wisdom in Phil's words.  "Very well.  I hope you survive."  He flew off.

               "The same to you."  Phil addressed Vegeta.  "Vegeta, don't do this!  I can feel the good in you!"

               Goku looked at Phil with a confused expression on his face.  "Really?  All I'm getting is evil."

               "Actually, it's more like apathy, but in this case it's the same thing."

               "Enough talk!"  Vegeta flew towards Phil at top speed.  Phil managed to dodge the assault by leaping out of the way. 

               Phil weighed his options.  OK, the Reality Checker won't help; he'll still be stronger than me, and that Saiyan model armor gives him an even greater advantage.  Fortunately, he attacked first, or I wouldn't be able to fight him legally.  "Looks like I'll have to do this the old fashioned way.  Improved Kaio-ken times one hundred!"  A dim red glow surrounded his body.  "Let's do this."

               Miles away, GoChibi cocked her head.  She felt several things simultaneously; the familiar aura of her Godfather increasing dramatically, and a dark presence around both him and Vegeta.  A few moments later, both Goku and Vegeta had advanced to Super Saiyan level two.  Also, she could feel an alien signature.  It was asleep, but rapidly gaining power.  "Dad needs me."

               Chichi looked down at her granddaughter.  "What?"

               GoChibi seemed shocked.  "Can't you feel it?"  Android 18, who had joined them, also noticed.  Yamcha looked up from the chess game.  "Three massive powers just flared, and another is rapidly gaining energy.  I need to go."

               Yamcha pointed at Usagi.  "What about her?"

               "Uh, would you mind watching Mom for a bit?  I really need to go."  No child ever expects to say that.

               Chichi looked down at GoChibi.  "You can't go!  No granddaughter of mine is going off to war!  I messed up enough with my own children!"

               "Sorry, Grandma.  I have to help Phil and Dad."  She homed in on Gohan's Chi, and teleported away.

               Gohan and Dabura were still locked in mortal combat.  After several minutes of direct confrontation, each had realized that they weren't going to win the battle by conventional means.  The ship had several large holes in the hull, and the four levels that had previously existed had been transformed into one gigantic super level.  The Super Saiyan and the demon now stalked each other on the bottom level, each attempting to ambush the other.  Gohan shuffled silently along a wall, stretching out his senses.  He has to be around here somewhere.  Suddenly, Dabura crashed through the wall, sending a wall of flame at the young Saiyan.  After a few moments, Gohan leapt through the fire.

               "When will you learn?  Fire doesn't hurt me!"  Gohan kicked him in the solar plexus.  However, Gohan realized that letting him fly off into the darkness wouldn't be a good idea, since Dabura could just launch another surprise assault.  Rushing forward, Gohan used the Renzoku Energy Dan to fire a barrage of Chi bolts after the stunned demon.  A massive explosion followed, knocking Gohan from his feet.  He flew through one wall, and found himself embedded in another.  "Ow."

               It was at this moment that GoChibi materialized next to her father.  "Hey, Dad!"

               "What… oh, it's you.  What is it?"

               "You're going to need my help."  The roots of her hair turned blond, and she was encased in a yellow aura. 

               "What is that, an incomplete Super Saiyan transformation?"

               "Nope.  It's a more efficient version."

               "I see.  Why don't you think I can handle this myself?"

               "Actually, I think Dabura's dead; you just blasted him into the backup fusion reactor.  We're safe at this distance, but the radiation has probably killed him by now."

               "Not quite, little girl!"  He flew towards the fighters, a look of rage in his eyes.  He now glowed a sick green color, and his black hair was falling out.  Red skin was beginning to flake away, and most of his costume was burnt away (for modesty's sake, the equivalent of a loincloth remained.)

               "Together!  Ka…"

               Gohan caught on.  "Me…"

               "Ha…"

               "Me…"

               "HA!"  Twin beams of blue energy flew out, incinerating Dabura where he stood.  The blast continued onward, completely gutting the ship.  Nobody would ever figure out why this battle hadn't awakened Majin Buu.

               "Now, let's go deal with Babadi!"

               "Right behind you, Dad!"

               Phil was trading blows with Vegeta.  The Kaio-ken times one hundred gave him roughly three quarters of the Saiyan's strength.  Phil could keep up with him, but Vegeta was gaining ground.  Fortunately, Goku had also entered the fray.  The two had Vegeta on the run.

               Phil landed a nasty uppercut against Vegeta, sending him flying into a nearby mesa.  As the centuries old formation crumbled, Phil began to feel an odd tightness around his chest, but ignored it.  "Improved Kamehameha!"  The laser beam flew down, causing a massive explosion.  Hundreds of miles away in Tokyo, a minor earthquake shook the city.  At ground zero, a massive shockwave threw the warriors back. 

               Phil landed badly on his right arm, creating hairline fractures across the bones.  There was also an odd numbness, but Phil decided that he had more important worries.  For example, Vegeta had recovered from the assault and was fighting with Goku.  It appeared as if Vegeta hadn't suffered any damage as a result of the attack.

               "I have to end this fast. I've never attempted this level before, but I have no choice. Improved Kaio-ken times two hundred!"  The dull red glow was replaced by an explosive aura similar to that of a standard Kaio-ken.  The tightness became almost unbearable, but he continued.  Flying at nearly mach five, Phil slammed into Vegeta.  His left hook sent the Saiyan Prince flying.  Taking advantage of his increased speed, Phil intercepted Vegeta before he reached the ground.  Phil began to punch Vegeta with both arms, ignoring the pain that was spreading throughout his body.

               Goku was shocked.  "H-how can anybody get the Kaio-ken up to that level?  His body should have vaporized!"

               Finally, the heart attack caught up with the Physics Policeman.  The red aura collapsed, as did Phil.  Vegeta slowly regained his senses.  He sat up and then coughed up a trickle of blood, followed by a tooth.  "Impressive.  You are indeed a worthy adversary."  Vegeta saw that Phil was lying there with a look of pure agony on his face.  "However, it would appear that your own strength has killed you.  How ironic."  Vegeta lowered his gloved hand at Phil, and was knocked back as Goku kicked him in the face. 

               Standing over his fallen comrade, Goku looked down at him.  "Are you all right?"

               "Pushed… myself too hard.  I think I'm… having a heart attack.  In my right pocket there is a bag of… senzu beans.  Quickly!  There isn't much time!"  Goku flipped Phil over roughly.  "Ow."  Taking a senzu bean, he placed it in Phil's mouth.  He crunched the magical fruit, and he felt a wave of comfort as his damaged cellular tissue repaired itself.  Phil sat upright, and ate another.  "How idiotic!  I can't believe I did that!"

               "Don't worry.  I think I'll take it from here.  You go and rest."

               "I don't think I could summon another Kaio-ken, but I still have my uses."  He pulled a small device from his pocket.  It resembled a remote control.

               "What's that?"

               "Audit gun.  Get me in close, and I'll show you what it can do."

               A few moments later, Vegeta flipped to his feet to find that Phil was waiting for him.  "What do you think your doing?  That Reality Checker of yours won't save you this time!"

               "Oh?  Well, I'll have you know that this isn't a Reality Checker."  He pointed the device at Vegeta, and pressed the button on the top of it.  The equivalent of a laser pen sent a beam of light across Vegeta's face.  "What are you trying to do, blind me?"  Suddenly, a man appeared from nowhere.  "Who are you?"

               "My name is John, and I'm with the IRS.  Who called for the audit?"

               "I did.  I'm Phil and I'm with the Physics Police."  Phil showed him his license.

               "Alright.  Unfortunately, I must inform you that we cannot audit Mr. Vegeta."

               "What?"

               "You see, in order to be audited, one must have a taxable income.  However, Vegeta here is a lazy bum who lives off of his girlfriend and her father.  Have a nice day."  A wormhole opened behind the agent, and he walked towards it.

               "Hold on a second."  Phil pulled a silver dollar from his pocket.  "Vegeta, I'll give you this money if you convert some oxygen into carbon dioxide for me."

               "Huh?"

               "Good enough.  Here's your pay."  He flipped the coin at Vegeta.  The Saiyan caught it.

               John's face brightened.  "Now, let's see… failure to sign form 124-68493-109384-109238 involving menial labor.  You'll be coming with me."

               "Never!"  Vegeta fired a bolt of energy at the IRS agent.  It seemed to blast him into tiny bits.  An instant later, John's various body parts turned a metallic gray color, converted into liquid, then moved into a puddle at the Saiyan's feet.  The man reformed from the metal and glared at Vegeta.

               "Do you have any idea how much that stings?"

               "Impossible!  Die, human!"  Another bolt flew out, with the same results.

               Phil grinned.  "You're just going to make him mad."

               John unclipped a small communicator from his belt.  "This is agent 904398-098.  I'll be needing a SWAT* team."

               A tinny voice responded, "Roger."

A portal opened behind Vegeta.  A pair of men stepped out.  They were clothed in business suits, and the green flicker of Reality Checker fields surrounded them. Each suit was adorned with the letters IRS. "Surrender, Vegeta."

               "No!"  He fired a pair of energy bolts at the men, but they dissipated upon contact with the green energy.  Moving quickly, they used their rocket packs to bring Vegeta within the Reality Checkers' fields.  Grabbing him roughly, they hauled him back into the portal.  John followed them.

               Goku had a look of pure terror on his face.  "H-how!?  Vegeta was the strongest being on the planet!"

               "Goku, what you fail to realize is that the IRS is the single most powerful force in the universe."

               "Oh."

               "Now, let's go stop Babadi."

               "Right!"

                                                                                          End Part 16

               Next Time: The awakening of Majin Buu?  Wait and see!

               *SWAT: Special Warrants And Technicalities.  Basically, a lawyer assault squad.