Part 27
The Symobiote's Tale
By Bobcat
Disclaimer: Oops! Forgot the disclaimer last chapter! I sure hope I don't get sued! Oh well. This isn't mine (Well, most of it anyways).
Last time, a very interesting situation was shaping up. For those who have short memories, I'll recap.
There was an old man taking a late night walk through a bad neighborhood of Tokyo. There was a knife wielding thug named after a video- game dinosaur ready to pounce on him. Yoshi was in hiding, completely unaware that he was being closely watched by an American vigilante known as Venom. That "superhero" was being eyed hungrily by Cell. Now, let us see what develops, shall we?
The old man was whistling a tune that he had just heard on the radio. These evening walks had, in recent years, become the highlight of his days. It had been so disappointing when he had discovered that his grandchildren had no interest in the nightly excursions, but he had adapted. Nearly twenty years before, he had taken out his youngest son, Shin, on these walks, but now Shin told him that it was "damned foolish" to go out at this time of night. "Those thugs have all kinds of illegal weapons, and they won't hesitate to use them. You should exercise in the morning, if at all! You've been very lucky all these years! I refuse to take part in this idiocy!"
The old man snorted. "To think, my own flesh and blood; a coward." The walks had never been for exercise. It was a time to reflect; what was happening in his life, what was happening to others, issues of global significance, etc. At one time, he had believed that Shin had understood the purpose of the journeys, but he had failed to instill that basic bit of knowledge. "Besides, I am only a poor old man. What kind of idiot would mug me?"
That was when Yoshi stepped behind him. "Your money or your life, old man!"
"What?"
"You heard me!" The switchblade snapped out of the carrying case. "Now, fork over the cash or else!"
A deep voice seemed to emanate from nowhere. "Kids these days. No manners at all."
"Who?" He turned around. There was nobody to be seen. "Come out, or I'll slice you so bad, you, uh..." Metaphor had never been Yoshi's strong point. "You'll wish that I hadn't sliced you up so bad!"
Venom chuckled. "My, you are a clever one. Now, if I don't come out, how do you intend to slice me?"
"Uh..." He was confused. He hadn't ever thought of that before. "I dunno. But where are you?"
The gravely voice sighed. "Ever consider UP, genius?" Yoshi looked up, and regretted it immediately. There was some kind of creature in a black bodysuit. He thought that he recognized the spider insignia.
"Ah! It's that American guy, whatcha call it, Spiderman!"
Venom glowered at the man. "Oh, you'll suffer for that." By this time, the elderly man was running for his life. He hadn't backed down from the punk, but demons were another thing entirely. "We are Venom. We hate Spiderman. He is our mortal enemy."
"What do you want?"
"We will eat your spleen!" The costume extruded a pseudopod that grabbed Yoshi where he stood. The young man jabbed the symbiote with his switchblade. "Come now. Did you really expect that to work?"
The young man was confused. "Well, uh, yeah. When you stab things, they die."
"My, you are a bright one, aren't you."
"Uh, thanks."
"That was sarcasm, you dolt!"
"Oh." Venom reeled him in. Soon, he was face to face with the monstrosity.
Venom grinned wickedly at the young man. "This is where you're supposed to scream and beg for your life."
"Will you not kill me if I do?"
Venom looked shocked. "We've been doing this for years, and this is the first time that anybody's asked us that. And the answer is no. Seems rather obvious, don't you think?"
"No, my pop said I wasn't much of a thinker."
"Your father was an intelligent man."
"Hey, uh, what's a spleen? You sure I got one?"
"We're not exactly sure. We'll be sure to get ourselves a medical textbook when we're done with you." One of Venom's fingers reformed into a blade. "Now, you die." Venom simply sliced the man open. He rooted around, then grabbed a likely looking organ and snarfed it down in one bite. "Yummy."
"How vulgar." Venom looked up to see a strange being floating over his head. "Me, I prefer not to dismember my victims."
"We've seen you on the news, Cell. That was some job you pulled on the Fantastic Four."
"You don't seem the slightest bit distressed about it."
Venom snorted. "We had no use for those "heroes". Always too concerned with giant ants or whatnot to see society's real problems. Such as the declining quality of thugs." Venom frowned, looking down at the bleeding body of Yoshi. Venom rooted around and found another blood soaked bit of tissue and ate it. "Mmmm. Adrenal gland."
"You do realize that I'm after you to, right?"
"We surmised as much. You will let us finish this one first, right? It seems piggish to us to have two at once."
"My, you're confident."
Venom threw aside Yoshi's body. The boy still clung to life, but he wouldn't last much longer. "We are done. We considered the heart, but with all the junk that people eat these days, we decided that it would be better just to avoid that cholesterol. Now, it's your turn." Venom lifted his arms toward Cell and shot out a net composed of his biological webbing. Cell was encased in seconds. "There! We would like to see you break out of that!"
Cell tested it a bit, stretching the web. "Yes. This is stronger than Spiderman's. I got him a few days ago, you know."
Venom's eyes narrowed. "He was ours!"
"It doesn't matter. You'll be dead in a minute anyways. Flame On!" The fire consumed the web in moments. Venom was worried. Cell could sense his fear. "Yes, I know your little weaknesses. Fire and sonics, I believe? Let me see what kind of strategies you have developed to combat somebody like me." Cell sent a tongue of flame out at Venom, who simply leapt over the attack. "Good, your agility is just what I thought it would be. I can't wait to access your powers. It could just give me the edge I need."
"We'll put out that irritating little flame of yours!" Venom extended a pseudopod and ripped away fire hydrant. Then, reshaping the appendage into a makeshift hose, Venom rechanneled the water. The end of the hose was smaller, and he built up pressure before releasing a spray of water that doused Cell's fire. "Ha! What now, smart guy?"
"Have you ever met an X-Man by the name of Banshee?"
"No, we haven't. Why?"
"He screams really loudly, and can use his sonic waves for various pursuits." Venom cried out as Cell did the same. He clutched his ears, but it didn't stop the symobiote's suffering. It writhed about, pseudopods flailing about randomly.
As suddenly as the assault began, it stopped. "Why did you stop?"
"I decided it was unfair to take advantage of your weaknesses. Besides, I could accidentally kill the symbiote."
"We will eat your spleen!" Venom leapt forward, claw like fingers ready to eviscerate Cell. Cell faded away, and Venom slammed face first into a brick wall. "Ouch".
Cell clenched his fists, and from each fist sprouted three long, metallic claws. "Let's go, bub."
"Where did you get claws like that?"
"I'm the best at what I do. And what I do isn't very nice."
"We were hoping for something a bit more specific."
"I absorbed Wolverine, just like I did the Fantastic Four, the Justice League, the Avengers, the X-Men, the Legion of Doom, and many others. You have no idea how hard it was to assimilate the adamantium." Cell faded away again and sliced through Venom's right arm. The vigilante screamed in pain. "I grow weary of this. I thought you would prove entertaining." Cell's stinger lashed out, and it was all over. As the symbiote spread across Cell's body, neither of the merging beings noticed that the tiny scrap of alien symbiote that had been connected to Eddie Brock's right arm slinking away. Cell had used various psychic and Force techniques to mesmerize the symbiote and make it somewhat controllable, but the increasingly independent alien slinking away wasn't going to be fooled. It found a nearby alley, and hid. It would need to find a host soon in order to survive.
Meanwhile, having finished his business in China, Phil was out flying over the Pacific, roughly twenty miles south of Japan. He was happily listening to a CD entitled, "The Best of Weird Al Yankovich," when his communications watch beeped. He turned off a song entitled, "Yoda," and pressed a small button. "This is Phil. Talk to me."
"This is Ralph. We finally managed to fix the Gravity Room, even without your help! You'll pay for that. But, I called because there was some kind of disturbance over in Tokyo, and it involves Cell."
"I'm listening."
"Well, Venom ran afoul of Cell. There was only one witness, and he says that Cell got him, then left. However, Washuu's scanners are still picking up some kind of alien signature in the area. You should go check it out."
"Roger." Phil utilized the Mystical Powerup, and blasted away.
He arrived about five minutes later and took out the pokedex-like scanning device. He found a trail of blood. He followed it, and found the mutilated corpse of Yoshi. "Ick. OK, obviously Venom still hasn't gone along with the normal super-hero method of taking them alive." He found another pool ten meters away. The scanner decided that this was also human blood, but there were tiny flecks of something alien strewn about in it. The scanner began to flash various colors as attempted to narrow it down. Finally, it flashed a dark purple. "Damn! There's an alien symbiote around here somewhere." Phil readied a sonic grenade. He waved the scanner about, and it said that it was in a nearby alley. He cautiously walked in. He waved it around at eye level, then looked up. That was when the tiny black creature attacked his leg.
Phil attempted to activate the sonic grenade, but a pseudopod from the symbiote knocked it out of the alley. Phil powered up his Chi, attempting to extricate the alien costume with a wall of energy. Unfortunately, it had already slipped under his clothes. All that he managed to do was fling away a few tiny scraps of symbiote, but they came back quickly enough. Phil leapt sideways, hoping to knock it off. He slammed into the wall hard enough to shake loose a few bricks, but the alien simply clung to his skin. "Damn!" It took him a few moments to realize that he was clinging to the wall via Venom's powers. "Well, this is new."
Suddenly, the symbiote connected with his mind. It related the entire sad tale of Cell's attack, and told him that he wanted revenge. "Yeah, you symobiotes do revenge rather nicely." Phil weighed the pros and the cons. On the one hand, he now had a black alien costume bonded to him, possibly forever. On the other, he had all sorts of new powers, like the ability to stick to walls. Webbing would also be cool. Plus, he realized that it would give him a significant boost in strength. "And I'll never have to shop for clothes ever again." This statement alone was enough to make up his mind. "OK, fine. You can stay. Now, we're going to lay down some ground rules. First, no taking over my body when I'm asleep. If you do it, I will find a way to get rid of you. Rule number two: we don't eat spleens, and no making a mask as ugly as Venom's. Got it?" It signaled affirmative. "Good. Now to go home." On a whim, he reformed the costume into Spiderman's and began to websling through the city. After a few moments, he grinned beneath the mask. "Now this is cool."
* * *
"Lord Schlager, our sensors have picked up an object heading our way at high speeds. It is roughly the size of a standard bipedal organism, but it's oddly flat in one spot. We'll have visual in a moment."
"Very good, Mister Sulu." Schlager had picked up the evil Sulu from the alternate dimension some time ago, and had put him in charge of his flagship. The screen came to life, and there was an almost comical being flying towards them. He was naked, and looked like he was made out of chrome. However, the oddest thing about him was that he was riding on a surfboard of the same material. "T'Keela, what do was have on this guy?"
The Twi'lek woman looked down at the tiny computer. After a few moments, she responded, "My Lord, according to our archives, he is a being known as the Silver Surfer. He was apparently a herald of Galactus, the devourer of worlds."
"Yes, he always has been bad for business. Rather inefficient, eating the population with the planet."
"The Surfer has since betrayed Galactus, and has become something of a hero, crusading for "Truth and Justice." A rather futile pursuit, yes?"
"T'Keela I didn't ask for commentary. What kind of power does he have?"
"He is infused with what is known as "The Power Cosmic." His skin is incredibly durable, he can fire energy beams, has incredible strength and has some kind of psychic control over his surfboard. He could prove an interesting quarry, my Lord."
"Very good. Mister Sulu, bring us to a halt. I shall be naught but a moment."
"Yes, Lord Schlager."
With that, Schlager teleported from the bridge. He unsheathed his massive broadsword and pointed the tip at the Surfer. They somehow communicated telepathically. "Silver Surfer, what a pleasant surprise. What brings you to my part of the universe?"
The silver man glared at him. "You know very well what you've done, murderer. I come for justice for the people of Se'kushia who lie dead, and freedom for those who remain."
"Well, that's nice and all, but I for one was planning on playing with you for a bit, perhaps remove one or more limbs, then reveal how little of my full potential I was actually using, then probably you beg for death. How do you like that?" The Silver Surfer's only response was to fire a bolt of energy at Schlager. The horned man didn't even seem to notice the beam of cosmic energy. Schlager faded away, then reappeared with his knee in the Surfer's gut. The Silver Surfer managed to stop his flight by catching himself with board. Schlager unsheathed the broadsword.
Silver Surfer sent a bolt of energy at the sword. "This shall melt your weapon... what? It remains intact? How is this possible?"
Schlager grinned. "This sword is forged of adamantium. I believe you've heard of it." He slashed down, and the Surfer barely managed to avoid the blade. The Surfer focused more cosmic energy.
"You shall not live to harm more innocents, monster!" Twin beams of energy flew out from his hands. Schlager's face contorted in agony as the power struck his chest, incinerated the silk robe. After a few moments, the Silver Surfer found himself unable to continue his attack. A bruise marred Schlager's chest, but there was little other damage. "What!?"
Schlager glared at the Surfer. "That hurt. And you ruined my favorite robe. Prepare to die!" The Surfer, realizing that he was horribly outclassed, flew away. Schlager stayed on his tail. "You can't run, you pathetic weakling! Come back here so that I may smite thee!" Just as he finished his useless chatter, Schlager's foe went to light speed. "Damn!" Schlager teleported back onto his bridge.
"That coward! And I was so looking to dismembering him." He sighed. "I'm depressed. Let's go lay waste to... Alpha Centari. That should make me feel better. To hyperspace, mister Sulu."
"Aye, my Lord."
Meanwhile, the Surfer was flying with all possible speed towards Earth. "The humans must be warned. Perhaps the Fantastic Four can aid me again. This being had powers to dwarf even Galactus' might! His mad campaign must be halted!"
Elsewhere:
Lotion awoke. She took a quick glance of the area, and determined that she was in her grandmother's hut. The old woman was sitting by her bed. She had a stern look etched into her features. "What have you done?"
"What do you mean, Grandmother?"
Gel's features grew even sterner. "I didn't think that I had raised any idiots, but I was wrong. You saw what he did to Soap, and how easily he did it. What were you thinking?"
"I'm not sure. I felt drawn to him. Besides, he's kind of cute."
"WHAT? This is more than some fling, you fool! The Kiss of Marriage is just that! You are now married in the eyes of the tribe! It one of our most sacred vows! You just committed yourself to bring home a man with strength far greater than any member of our tribe."
"Exactly, Grandmother. If I could bring him in, his blood could give the Amazons greater strength than any supposedly "modern" power!"
"You forget that he specifically stated that he wouldn't honor our customs. He is rebellious, and too strong to be brought to heel with physical strength."
"Grandmother, men are simpletons, with only one thing on their mind."
Gel sighed. "I had thought that I had raised you better than that. Haven't I told you that you cannot judge one by their gender?" She sighed in an even more dejected tone. "I suppose the prattlings of an old woman are nothing compared to our tribe's propaganda. That "Phil" was very intelligent. I only foresee failure in your efforts. However, it is too late for regrets. Did you ever consider how you would track one who could fly?"
"I didn't know that he could fly when I kissed him!" She hadn't considered that. She had blacked out shortly after he had taken to the air.
"I suppose you had no way of knowing that. I will give you what aid I can. You can take the family sword." Lotion looked in awe as Gel unsheathed the ancient weapon. Carved into the katana was a pictographic history of Lotion's family. That Gel was willing to bestow such an honor upon her showed that she had great faith in Lotion herself, if not in her quest. "Here. He dropped this. This should help you find him." It was a journal with the words "Ralph's Diary: Keep Out. That Means You, Phil!" written on the cover. She flipped it open. "I believe that it is in English, but these maps are excellent. From what I can gather, he is currently residing in Japan, in this mountain range. I cannot help you beyond that."
"Thank you, Grandmother."
"I pray that you have not doomed yourself. Should you fail, you will be unable to return to this village. I shall miss you."
"And I you, Grandmother."
"Good luck, Lotion." Lotion quickly left the hut, almost forgetting to grab her pack. Gel sighed. "Ah, the impetuousness of youth."
A few hours later, at the Masaki shrine:
Phil tiptoed in, carefully making sure not to be too loud. According to a nearby clock, it was three in the morning. Or at least, that's what he thought it said. He cursed silently to himself. "Damned Japanese lettering system!" He had arrived a few hours before, and was very happy to be back. He yawned loudly. "I'm gonna sleep till noon. Yeah, that sounds good."
"Hello, Phil."
"Huh?" There, sitting in the shadows, was Ayeka. "What're you doing up, Princess?"
"I've been waiting here for the past eight hours."
"What?"
"You lied. You said that you would be training today. You never came back after lunch. I spent all day hiding in my room, fearing your next attack. But nothing came. What's even worse is that you made those innocent children lie. They said you were plotting. It is obvious that you were doing nothing of the sort. Where were you?"
"Not that it's any of your business, Princess, but I was getting the people who live near Jusenkyo Springs out of Cell's path of destruction."
"The what Springs?"
"If you must know, it is a place of great sorrow. A few thousand years back, something caused a great pocket of black magic to form over a part of the Bayankala mountain range in China. Some say it was the created to reflect the sorrow felt by somebody after the death of a great leader. Others say that some belligerent wizard decided to inflict some evil upon humanity. Nobody really knows. Now, the idea is that, over the millennia, some people and creatures wandered into this cursed place and would, through some accident or another, drown in the pools. Now, if somebody falls into one of these pools, they assume the form of whatever fell into the pool last, or, if they drown, the pool is remade so that whoever falls in takes their shape. Of course, you aren't identical to the person who drowned in the pool. You look like you would have had you been born as that kind of creature or person. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get some sleep."
"I'll get you yet, you monster!" As Phil trudged up the stairs, Ayeka began to think. "These cursed springs... they sound like that pointless Anime, Ranko ¾ or something, that Ryoko is always watching. I see possibility..." And then the Ayeka, she had an idea. An awful idea. Ayeka had a wonderful, awful idea. "I'll make myself a Santy Claus hat and coat." She pondered this for a moment. "Maybe I should try again." Since this could take a while, what say that we skip to the next scene.
End Part 27
The Symobiote's Tale
By Bobcat
Disclaimer: Oops! Forgot the disclaimer last chapter! I sure hope I don't get sued! Oh well. This isn't mine (Well, most of it anyways).
Last time, a very interesting situation was shaping up. For those who have short memories, I'll recap.
There was an old man taking a late night walk through a bad neighborhood of Tokyo. There was a knife wielding thug named after a video- game dinosaur ready to pounce on him. Yoshi was in hiding, completely unaware that he was being closely watched by an American vigilante known as Venom. That "superhero" was being eyed hungrily by Cell. Now, let us see what develops, shall we?
The old man was whistling a tune that he had just heard on the radio. These evening walks had, in recent years, become the highlight of his days. It had been so disappointing when he had discovered that his grandchildren had no interest in the nightly excursions, but he had adapted. Nearly twenty years before, he had taken out his youngest son, Shin, on these walks, but now Shin told him that it was "damned foolish" to go out at this time of night. "Those thugs have all kinds of illegal weapons, and they won't hesitate to use them. You should exercise in the morning, if at all! You've been very lucky all these years! I refuse to take part in this idiocy!"
The old man snorted. "To think, my own flesh and blood; a coward." The walks had never been for exercise. It was a time to reflect; what was happening in his life, what was happening to others, issues of global significance, etc. At one time, he had believed that Shin had understood the purpose of the journeys, but he had failed to instill that basic bit of knowledge. "Besides, I am only a poor old man. What kind of idiot would mug me?"
That was when Yoshi stepped behind him. "Your money or your life, old man!"
"What?"
"You heard me!" The switchblade snapped out of the carrying case. "Now, fork over the cash or else!"
A deep voice seemed to emanate from nowhere. "Kids these days. No manners at all."
"Who?" He turned around. There was nobody to be seen. "Come out, or I'll slice you so bad, you, uh..." Metaphor had never been Yoshi's strong point. "You'll wish that I hadn't sliced you up so bad!"
Venom chuckled. "My, you are a clever one. Now, if I don't come out, how do you intend to slice me?"
"Uh..." He was confused. He hadn't ever thought of that before. "I dunno. But where are you?"
The gravely voice sighed. "Ever consider UP, genius?" Yoshi looked up, and regretted it immediately. There was some kind of creature in a black bodysuit. He thought that he recognized the spider insignia.
"Ah! It's that American guy, whatcha call it, Spiderman!"
Venom glowered at the man. "Oh, you'll suffer for that." By this time, the elderly man was running for his life. He hadn't backed down from the punk, but demons were another thing entirely. "We are Venom. We hate Spiderman. He is our mortal enemy."
"What do you want?"
"We will eat your spleen!" The costume extruded a pseudopod that grabbed Yoshi where he stood. The young man jabbed the symbiote with his switchblade. "Come now. Did you really expect that to work?"
The young man was confused. "Well, uh, yeah. When you stab things, they die."
"My, you are a bright one, aren't you."
"Uh, thanks."
"That was sarcasm, you dolt!"
"Oh." Venom reeled him in. Soon, he was face to face with the monstrosity.
Venom grinned wickedly at the young man. "This is where you're supposed to scream and beg for your life."
"Will you not kill me if I do?"
Venom looked shocked. "We've been doing this for years, and this is the first time that anybody's asked us that. And the answer is no. Seems rather obvious, don't you think?"
"No, my pop said I wasn't much of a thinker."
"Your father was an intelligent man."
"Hey, uh, what's a spleen? You sure I got one?"
"We're not exactly sure. We'll be sure to get ourselves a medical textbook when we're done with you." One of Venom's fingers reformed into a blade. "Now, you die." Venom simply sliced the man open. He rooted around, then grabbed a likely looking organ and snarfed it down in one bite. "Yummy."
"How vulgar." Venom looked up to see a strange being floating over his head. "Me, I prefer not to dismember my victims."
"We've seen you on the news, Cell. That was some job you pulled on the Fantastic Four."
"You don't seem the slightest bit distressed about it."
Venom snorted. "We had no use for those "heroes". Always too concerned with giant ants or whatnot to see society's real problems. Such as the declining quality of thugs." Venom frowned, looking down at the bleeding body of Yoshi. Venom rooted around and found another blood soaked bit of tissue and ate it. "Mmmm. Adrenal gland."
"You do realize that I'm after you to, right?"
"We surmised as much. You will let us finish this one first, right? It seems piggish to us to have two at once."
"My, you're confident."
Venom threw aside Yoshi's body. The boy still clung to life, but he wouldn't last much longer. "We are done. We considered the heart, but with all the junk that people eat these days, we decided that it would be better just to avoid that cholesterol. Now, it's your turn." Venom lifted his arms toward Cell and shot out a net composed of his biological webbing. Cell was encased in seconds. "There! We would like to see you break out of that!"
Cell tested it a bit, stretching the web. "Yes. This is stronger than Spiderman's. I got him a few days ago, you know."
Venom's eyes narrowed. "He was ours!"
"It doesn't matter. You'll be dead in a minute anyways. Flame On!" The fire consumed the web in moments. Venom was worried. Cell could sense his fear. "Yes, I know your little weaknesses. Fire and sonics, I believe? Let me see what kind of strategies you have developed to combat somebody like me." Cell sent a tongue of flame out at Venom, who simply leapt over the attack. "Good, your agility is just what I thought it would be. I can't wait to access your powers. It could just give me the edge I need."
"We'll put out that irritating little flame of yours!" Venom extended a pseudopod and ripped away fire hydrant. Then, reshaping the appendage into a makeshift hose, Venom rechanneled the water. The end of the hose was smaller, and he built up pressure before releasing a spray of water that doused Cell's fire. "Ha! What now, smart guy?"
"Have you ever met an X-Man by the name of Banshee?"
"No, we haven't. Why?"
"He screams really loudly, and can use his sonic waves for various pursuits." Venom cried out as Cell did the same. He clutched his ears, but it didn't stop the symobiote's suffering. It writhed about, pseudopods flailing about randomly.
As suddenly as the assault began, it stopped. "Why did you stop?"
"I decided it was unfair to take advantage of your weaknesses. Besides, I could accidentally kill the symbiote."
"We will eat your spleen!" Venom leapt forward, claw like fingers ready to eviscerate Cell. Cell faded away, and Venom slammed face first into a brick wall. "Ouch".
Cell clenched his fists, and from each fist sprouted three long, metallic claws. "Let's go, bub."
"Where did you get claws like that?"
"I'm the best at what I do. And what I do isn't very nice."
"We were hoping for something a bit more specific."
"I absorbed Wolverine, just like I did the Fantastic Four, the Justice League, the Avengers, the X-Men, the Legion of Doom, and many others. You have no idea how hard it was to assimilate the adamantium." Cell faded away again and sliced through Venom's right arm. The vigilante screamed in pain. "I grow weary of this. I thought you would prove entertaining." Cell's stinger lashed out, and it was all over. As the symbiote spread across Cell's body, neither of the merging beings noticed that the tiny scrap of alien symbiote that had been connected to Eddie Brock's right arm slinking away. Cell had used various psychic and Force techniques to mesmerize the symbiote and make it somewhat controllable, but the increasingly independent alien slinking away wasn't going to be fooled. It found a nearby alley, and hid. It would need to find a host soon in order to survive.
Meanwhile, having finished his business in China, Phil was out flying over the Pacific, roughly twenty miles south of Japan. He was happily listening to a CD entitled, "The Best of Weird Al Yankovich," when his communications watch beeped. He turned off a song entitled, "Yoda," and pressed a small button. "This is Phil. Talk to me."
"This is Ralph. We finally managed to fix the Gravity Room, even without your help! You'll pay for that. But, I called because there was some kind of disturbance over in Tokyo, and it involves Cell."
"I'm listening."
"Well, Venom ran afoul of Cell. There was only one witness, and he says that Cell got him, then left. However, Washuu's scanners are still picking up some kind of alien signature in the area. You should go check it out."
"Roger." Phil utilized the Mystical Powerup, and blasted away.
He arrived about five minutes later and took out the pokedex-like scanning device. He found a trail of blood. He followed it, and found the mutilated corpse of Yoshi. "Ick. OK, obviously Venom still hasn't gone along with the normal super-hero method of taking them alive." He found another pool ten meters away. The scanner decided that this was also human blood, but there were tiny flecks of something alien strewn about in it. The scanner began to flash various colors as attempted to narrow it down. Finally, it flashed a dark purple. "Damn! There's an alien symbiote around here somewhere." Phil readied a sonic grenade. He waved the scanner about, and it said that it was in a nearby alley. He cautiously walked in. He waved it around at eye level, then looked up. That was when the tiny black creature attacked his leg.
Phil attempted to activate the sonic grenade, but a pseudopod from the symbiote knocked it out of the alley. Phil powered up his Chi, attempting to extricate the alien costume with a wall of energy. Unfortunately, it had already slipped under his clothes. All that he managed to do was fling away a few tiny scraps of symbiote, but they came back quickly enough. Phil leapt sideways, hoping to knock it off. He slammed into the wall hard enough to shake loose a few bricks, but the alien simply clung to his skin. "Damn!" It took him a few moments to realize that he was clinging to the wall via Venom's powers. "Well, this is new."
Suddenly, the symbiote connected with his mind. It related the entire sad tale of Cell's attack, and told him that he wanted revenge. "Yeah, you symobiotes do revenge rather nicely." Phil weighed the pros and the cons. On the one hand, he now had a black alien costume bonded to him, possibly forever. On the other, he had all sorts of new powers, like the ability to stick to walls. Webbing would also be cool. Plus, he realized that it would give him a significant boost in strength. "And I'll never have to shop for clothes ever again." This statement alone was enough to make up his mind. "OK, fine. You can stay. Now, we're going to lay down some ground rules. First, no taking over my body when I'm asleep. If you do it, I will find a way to get rid of you. Rule number two: we don't eat spleens, and no making a mask as ugly as Venom's. Got it?" It signaled affirmative. "Good. Now to go home." On a whim, he reformed the costume into Spiderman's and began to websling through the city. After a few moments, he grinned beneath the mask. "Now this is cool."
* * *
"Lord Schlager, our sensors have picked up an object heading our way at high speeds. It is roughly the size of a standard bipedal organism, but it's oddly flat in one spot. We'll have visual in a moment."
"Very good, Mister Sulu." Schlager had picked up the evil Sulu from the alternate dimension some time ago, and had put him in charge of his flagship. The screen came to life, and there was an almost comical being flying towards them. He was naked, and looked like he was made out of chrome. However, the oddest thing about him was that he was riding on a surfboard of the same material. "T'Keela, what do was have on this guy?"
The Twi'lek woman looked down at the tiny computer. After a few moments, she responded, "My Lord, according to our archives, he is a being known as the Silver Surfer. He was apparently a herald of Galactus, the devourer of worlds."
"Yes, he always has been bad for business. Rather inefficient, eating the population with the planet."
"The Surfer has since betrayed Galactus, and has become something of a hero, crusading for "Truth and Justice." A rather futile pursuit, yes?"
"T'Keela I didn't ask for commentary. What kind of power does he have?"
"He is infused with what is known as "The Power Cosmic." His skin is incredibly durable, he can fire energy beams, has incredible strength and has some kind of psychic control over his surfboard. He could prove an interesting quarry, my Lord."
"Very good. Mister Sulu, bring us to a halt. I shall be naught but a moment."
"Yes, Lord Schlager."
With that, Schlager teleported from the bridge. He unsheathed his massive broadsword and pointed the tip at the Surfer. They somehow communicated telepathically. "Silver Surfer, what a pleasant surprise. What brings you to my part of the universe?"
The silver man glared at him. "You know very well what you've done, murderer. I come for justice for the people of Se'kushia who lie dead, and freedom for those who remain."
"Well, that's nice and all, but I for one was planning on playing with you for a bit, perhaps remove one or more limbs, then reveal how little of my full potential I was actually using, then probably you beg for death. How do you like that?" The Silver Surfer's only response was to fire a bolt of energy at Schlager. The horned man didn't even seem to notice the beam of cosmic energy. Schlager faded away, then reappeared with his knee in the Surfer's gut. The Silver Surfer managed to stop his flight by catching himself with board. Schlager unsheathed the broadsword.
Silver Surfer sent a bolt of energy at the sword. "This shall melt your weapon... what? It remains intact? How is this possible?"
Schlager grinned. "This sword is forged of adamantium. I believe you've heard of it." He slashed down, and the Surfer barely managed to avoid the blade. The Surfer focused more cosmic energy.
"You shall not live to harm more innocents, monster!" Twin beams of energy flew out from his hands. Schlager's face contorted in agony as the power struck his chest, incinerated the silk robe. After a few moments, the Silver Surfer found himself unable to continue his attack. A bruise marred Schlager's chest, but there was little other damage. "What!?"
Schlager glared at the Surfer. "That hurt. And you ruined my favorite robe. Prepare to die!" The Surfer, realizing that he was horribly outclassed, flew away. Schlager stayed on his tail. "You can't run, you pathetic weakling! Come back here so that I may smite thee!" Just as he finished his useless chatter, Schlager's foe went to light speed. "Damn!" Schlager teleported back onto his bridge.
"That coward! And I was so looking to dismembering him." He sighed. "I'm depressed. Let's go lay waste to... Alpha Centari. That should make me feel better. To hyperspace, mister Sulu."
"Aye, my Lord."
Meanwhile, the Surfer was flying with all possible speed towards Earth. "The humans must be warned. Perhaps the Fantastic Four can aid me again. This being had powers to dwarf even Galactus' might! His mad campaign must be halted!"
Elsewhere:
Lotion awoke. She took a quick glance of the area, and determined that she was in her grandmother's hut. The old woman was sitting by her bed. She had a stern look etched into her features. "What have you done?"
"What do you mean, Grandmother?"
Gel's features grew even sterner. "I didn't think that I had raised any idiots, but I was wrong. You saw what he did to Soap, and how easily he did it. What were you thinking?"
"I'm not sure. I felt drawn to him. Besides, he's kind of cute."
"WHAT? This is more than some fling, you fool! The Kiss of Marriage is just that! You are now married in the eyes of the tribe! It one of our most sacred vows! You just committed yourself to bring home a man with strength far greater than any member of our tribe."
"Exactly, Grandmother. If I could bring him in, his blood could give the Amazons greater strength than any supposedly "modern" power!"
"You forget that he specifically stated that he wouldn't honor our customs. He is rebellious, and too strong to be brought to heel with physical strength."
"Grandmother, men are simpletons, with only one thing on their mind."
Gel sighed. "I had thought that I had raised you better than that. Haven't I told you that you cannot judge one by their gender?" She sighed in an even more dejected tone. "I suppose the prattlings of an old woman are nothing compared to our tribe's propaganda. That "Phil" was very intelligent. I only foresee failure in your efforts. However, it is too late for regrets. Did you ever consider how you would track one who could fly?"
"I didn't know that he could fly when I kissed him!" She hadn't considered that. She had blacked out shortly after he had taken to the air.
"I suppose you had no way of knowing that. I will give you what aid I can. You can take the family sword." Lotion looked in awe as Gel unsheathed the ancient weapon. Carved into the katana was a pictographic history of Lotion's family. That Gel was willing to bestow such an honor upon her showed that she had great faith in Lotion herself, if not in her quest. "Here. He dropped this. This should help you find him." It was a journal with the words "Ralph's Diary: Keep Out. That Means You, Phil!" written on the cover. She flipped it open. "I believe that it is in English, but these maps are excellent. From what I can gather, he is currently residing in Japan, in this mountain range. I cannot help you beyond that."
"Thank you, Grandmother."
"I pray that you have not doomed yourself. Should you fail, you will be unable to return to this village. I shall miss you."
"And I you, Grandmother."
"Good luck, Lotion." Lotion quickly left the hut, almost forgetting to grab her pack. Gel sighed. "Ah, the impetuousness of youth."
A few hours later, at the Masaki shrine:
Phil tiptoed in, carefully making sure not to be too loud. According to a nearby clock, it was three in the morning. Or at least, that's what he thought it said. He cursed silently to himself. "Damned Japanese lettering system!" He had arrived a few hours before, and was very happy to be back. He yawned loudly. "I'm gonna sleep till noon. Yeah, that sounds good."
"Hello, Phil."
"Huh?" There, sitting in the shadows, was Ayeka. "What're you doing up, Princess?"
"I've been waiting here for the past eight hours."
"What?"
"You lied. You said that you would be training today. You never came back after lunch. I spent all day hiding in my room, fearing your next attack. But nothing came. What's even worse is that you made those innocent children lie. They said you were plotting. It is obvious that you were doing nothing of the sort. Where were you?"
"Not that it's any of your business, Princess, but I was getting the people who live near Jusenkyo Springs out of Cell's path of destruction."
"The what Springs?"
"If you must know, it is a place of great sorrow. A few thousand years back, something caused a great pocket of black magic to form over a part of the Bayankala mountain range in China. Some say it was the created to reflect the sorrow felt by somebody after the death of a great leader. Others say that some belligerent wizard decided to inflict some evil upon humanity. Nobody really knows. Now, the idea is that, over the millennia, some people and creatures wandered into this cursed place and would, through some accident or another, drown in the pools. Now, if somebody falls into one of these pools, they assume the form of whatever fell into the pool last, or, if they drown, the pool is remade so that whoever falls in takes their shape. Of course, you aren't identical to the person who drowned in the pool. You look like you would have had you been born as that kind of creature or person. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get some sleep."
"I'll get you yet, you monster!" As Phil trudged up the stairs, Ayeka began to think. "These cursed springs... they sound like that pointless Anime, Ranko ¾ or something, that Ryoko is always watching. I see possibility..." And then the Ayeka, she had an idea. An awful idea. Ayeka had a wonderful, awful idea. "I'll make myself a Santy Claus hat and coat." She pondered this for a moment. "Maybe I should try again." Since this could take a while, what say that we skip to the next scene.
End Part 27
