What would happen if Kuwabara had his own TV show...part 5!
Note: KUWABARA LOVERS, YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE THIS CHAPTER, BUT I WANTED TO HAVE SOME FUN! (the kitty does NOT get hurt) IF YOU LIKE KUWABARA, GO READ MY FIC CALLED "She Chose Me?" THAT I WROTE ABOUT KUWABARA! (it really shows his good side) ALSO IF YOU LIKE JOEY FROM YU-GI-OH, PLEASE DON'T READ THIS! Also, I'm a big potty mouth in this chapter, but it's censored!
(The show now takes place in a stadium...that is empty. Well, almost empty, besides the hundreds of cheering people...or Just a cricket chirping)
Keiko: Hello, everyone and welcome to THE FIFTH AND FINAL EPISODE OF YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT! I'm your new host, Keiko!
Sora: AND I'M SORA!
Lina: I'M LINA!
Botan: AND I'M BOTAN!
Keiko, Lina, and Botan: AND...Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs does not own Yu-Yu Hakusho, Slayers, or any other anime. If she did...the world would be in chaos.
Sora: AND TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO TORTURE KUWABARA! FANGIRLS, THIS EPISODE IS DEDICATED TO YOU AND ANYBODY WHO HATES KUWABARA and/or JOEY!
Lina: LET'S BRING OUT THE VICTIM!
Botan: LET'S ASK THE AUDIENCE HOW TO TORTURE HIM!
Audience: *cricket chirps, and a paper flies by Botan in wind*
Botan: um, or not.
Godrina: you scare me.
Botan: Thank you! ^_^
Godrina: that's not a good thing.
Botan: oh.
Godrina: MOVING ON! I am Godrina, better known as Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs, also known as GotC, also known as Godri, also known as hey person.
Lina, Sora, Botan, and Keiko: O.o
Sora: COFFEE! SUGAR! SUGAR! COFFEE!
All but Sora: O.o
Godrina: You scare me too.
Sora: THAT'S OKAY!
Lina, Botan, and Keiko: O.o
Keiko: before we bring out our torturee, we would like to explain WHY THIS IS THE FINAL EPISODE!
Lina: why it is, isn't it? (insider joke...at school we'd say it is, isn't it in this really corny voice because the guy in a commercial that was on like five years ago...oh forget it, it's too complicated.)
Godrina: Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
Botan: we have brain problems here, don't we?
Godrina: Hn. You should talk.
Botan: You know I can hear you, right?
Godrina: yeah, and your point is...? I'm holding a microphone, I know that whatever I say, everyone can hear it.
Botan: oh, do come now! You're just like Hiei, party pooper.
Godrina: Hn.
Botan: T_T
Keiko: aww, you made Botan cry.
Godrina: so?
Lina: OFF TOPIC!
Godrina: Hn.
Keiko: Right. So this is the last episode because we are going to torture the host in this one! Let's hear it for the mastermind behind this completely stupid random insanity fic about torturing people, penname Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs, the one, the only Godrina!
Audience: *single person claps*
Godrina: (Thank you, Kitsune of Light!) man, are you stupid, Keiko.
Keiko: T_T...can we just get on with the relentless bashing of Kuwabara and Joey?
Lina: why is Joey in this fic in the first place?
Godrina: BECAUSE I HATE JOEY AND HE STINKS!
Lina: allllllllllrighty then. Let's get Joey!
*sleeping Joey (who is hugging a teddy bear and wearing care bear pajamas) appears on the stage.*
Lina: Care Bears, AAH! MY EYES!
Godrina: me first!
Joey: No, I don't want to go to school today, mommy. I wanna stay home and bake cookies with you! (another insider joke... but I'm waaaaaaay too lazy to explain it.)
Lina, Keiko, and Botan: O.o
Sora: COFFEE COFFEE SUGAR SUGAR COFFEE!
Lina, Keiko, and Botan: O.o
Godrina: *rings a giant gong next to Joey while wearing earmuffs*
Sora: Holy *beep* that is loud!
*gong continues to vibrate until silence returns.*
Joey: *wakes up* no, mommy just five more minutes...snore...
Godrina: :O WHAT THE *BEEP*?
Keiko: O.O I guess he's still asleep.
Sora: COFFEE! *dumps hot coffee on Joey's face*
Lina: *whince* oi, that burns...and I'm a fire sorceress...
Joey: ahhh, nice shower, *snort*
Godrina: *eye twitch* that's not...normal...
Botan: that's it, I've had enough of you. You're all too crazy for me! *makes her paddle appear and tries to fly off, but is struck by lightning.* WHAT WAS THAT FOR?
Godrina: I just wanted to see you get struck by lightning.
Botan: but you did, in Bonds of Fire (the Yu-Yu Hakusho movie, IT ROCKS!!!) I get stuck by lightning in the thunderstorm while flying out of the spirit (that must've taken me like five tries to spell, rei is MUCH easier to spell) world.
Godrina: yeah, well, then the camera angle was bad.
Botan: you're so mean! O_O
Godrina: no, I just don't give a *beep* what happens to you, because you're scared of everything and I don't know why, aren't you the CRYPT KEEPER? YOU CAN'T DIE!
Botan: I'm not the crypt keeper, I'm the grim reaper.
Godrina: they're the same *beep* thing!
Botan: watch your mouth!
Godrina: around WHO? THIS IS A PLACE WHERE NO *beep* PERSON IN THEIR *beep* RIGHT MIND WOULD *beep* *beep* *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* WATCH THIS *beep* *beep* EXCUSE OF A TV SHOW! WHY? BECAUSE IT IS USUALLY HOSTED BY A *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep*!
Keiko: you shouldn't say such bad things about kuwabara.
Godrina: I CAN IF I *beep* WANT!!!
Botan: @_@
Keiko and Lina: O.o
Sora: SUGAR! *Dumps a GIANT bag of sugar out on Joey, completely burying him.*
Lina: Buncha ameturs...*digs through the sugar, and holds Joey's nose*
Joey: *still asleep* Boy, you sure know how to build a great sandcastle, Yugi, but do you hafta do it on my stomach?
Godrina: I know how to wake him up...*mentally, to Joey* Joey, there is cake here...
Joey: cake?
Godrina: yes, and pizza, and cookies....
Joey: *wakes up* (remember people, he's covered in sugar and coffee...) nnnhh, SUGAR! *begins to devour the sugar*
Godrina: Hehe, I still got the touch.
Keiko: what did you do?
Godrina: I am the authoress, I can make anything I want happen in my fics. *makes a coconut drop out of the sky and hit Keiko on the head*
Lina: O.o
Keiko: @_@
Godrina: ^_^
Lina:...please, don't hurt me, almighty authoress...
Godrina: *makes all the sugar dissappear*
Joey and Sora: T_T
Godrina: Don't worry, you're the only girl left besides me. But, I don't like how similar your powers are to mine, but I don't want to be left alone with all these boys...
Lina: -^_^-
Godrina: goes backstage, and drags Kuwabara out, who is tied to a chair.
Kuwabara: Is it time for the special surprise part of the show yet?
Lina: why, yes it is! *evil grin*
Godrina: *drags out a kiddie pool, that is about five feet deep because it goes into the stage, somehow...* uh huh! ^_^
Kuwabara: I don't like that look you're giving me...
Joey: COOK? WHERE? FOOD?
Godrina: *beginning to get annoyed* no...there is no food, Joey.
Joey: T_T awwww...
Lina: *hits Joey on the head with a frying pan* Yeah, no food.
Joey: @_@...
Lina: LET THE RELENTLESS BASHING CONTINUE!
Godrina: you scare me...
Lina: -^_^- that's a compliment.
Godrina: hn.
Kuwabara: WHAT THE *beep* IS GOING ON HERE?!?!
Lina: *holds up an extrodinairly cute kitten*
Godrina: Aww...I don't want to watch this...*disappears*
Sora: COFFEE! *dumps coffee on Kuwabara's head*
Kuwabara: Ow, that is hot...
Sora: I know! ^_^
Lina: alllrighty...ahem...
Kuwabara: It's Eicachi!
Lina: yes, and I don't think she can swim either...
Kuwabara: NO! DON'T DROP HER IN THERE!
Lina: -_- can I make this more fun? Please?
(oh, all right, just get on with it.)
*cardboard shark fins pop up in the kiddie pool*
Lina: you can do better than that...
(so?)
Lina: oh, forget it. Now, I don't think she will swim very well either, especially if the pool is full of sharks.
Kuwabara: NO! EICACHI!
Lina: yes, Eicachi. *drops cat in the pool*
Godrina: *appears, catches cat in midair, and puts a rock in it's place, and dumps red food coloring in the pool, all in a split second, then disappears, so no one could possibly have seen her* Yeah!
Kuwabara: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Lina: yes.
Godrina: *appears* that's it, I don't like you anymore, because you weren't supposed to REALLY drop the cat in, you were supposed to make it look like you did...but I had to jump in and save the poor thing's life! *snuggles kitten* ^_^ I love kittens...*makes a piano drop out of the sky and land on Lina*
Sora: Sugar?
Godrina: coffee.
Sora: ^_^ *runs off in search of a Starbucks*
Godrina: coming soon to a Starbucks near you, and insane final fantasy guy in search of coffee and sugar, courtesy of Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs and her muse, Shigara.
Kuwabara: wow, that was a pretty good surprise, but what happened?
Godrina: -_-
Kuwabara: I-*gets attacked by a flying gorilla*
Godrina: ^_^ That's all for this fic! I might write a season two if I get enough reviews or bored, which might not happen until next summer, which is when I have all my spare time. No kittens were harmed in the making of this fic, and if you actually took the time to read this! I LOVE YOU! No, not THAT way...oh well, does this explain it? *hands you a virtual cookie* You'll get another one if you review. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, REVIEW! TTFN! Ta Ta For Now!
Note: KUWABARA LOVERS, YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE THIS CHAPTER, BUT I WANTED TO HAVE SOME FUN! (the kitty does NOT get hurt) IF YOU LIKE KUWABARA, GO READ MY FIC CALLED "She Chose Me?" THAT I WROTE ABOUT KUWABARA! (it really shows his good side) ALSO IF YOU LIKE JOEY FROM YU-GI-OH, PLEASE DON'T READ THIS! Also, I'm a big potty mouth in this chapter, but it's censored!
(The show now takes place in a stadium...that is empty. Well, almost empty, besides the hundreds of cheering people...or Just a cricket chirping)
Keiko: Hello, everyone and welcome to THE FIFTH AND FINAL EPISODE OF YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT! I'm your new host, Keiko!
Sora: AND I'M SORA!
Lina: I'M LINA!
Botan: AND I'M BOTAN!
Keiko, Lina, and Botan: AND...Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs does not own Yu-Yu Hakusho, Slayers, or any other anime. If she did...the world would be in chaos.
Sora: AND TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO TORTURE KUWABARA! FANGIRLS, THIS EPISODE IS DEDICATED TO YOU AND ANYBODY WHO HATES KUWABARA and/or JOEY!
Lina: LET'S BRING OUT THE VICTIM!
Botan: LET'S ASK THE AUDIENCE HOW TO TORTURE HIM!
Audience: *cricket chirps, and a paper flies by Botan in wind*
Botan: um, or not.
Godrina: you scare me.
Botan: Thank you! ^_^
Godrina: that's not a good thing.
Botan: oh.
Godrina: MOVING ON! I am Godrina, better known as Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs, also known as GotC, also known as Godri, also known as hey person.
Lina, Sora, Botan, and Keiko: O.o
Sora: COFFEE! SUGAR! SUGAR! COFFEE!
All but Sora: O.o
Godrina: You scare me too.
Sora: THAT'S OKAY!
Lina, Botan, and Keiko: O.o
Keiko: before we bring out our torturee, we would like to explain WHY THIS IS THE FINAL EPISODE!
Lina: why it is, isn't it? (insider joke...at school we'd say it is, isn't it in this really corny voice because the guy in a commercial that was on like five years ago...oh forget it, it's too complicated.)
Godrina: Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
Botan: we have brain problems here, don't we?
Godrina: Hn. You should talk.
Botan: You know I can hear you, right?
Godrina: yeah, and your point is...? I'm holding a microphone, I know that whatever I say, everyone can hear it.
Botan: oh, do come now! You're just like Hiei, party pooper.
Godrina: Hn.
Botan: T_T
Keiko: aww, you made Botan cry.
Godrina: so?
Lina: OFF TOPIC!
Godrina: Hn.
Keiko: Right. So this is the last episode because we are going to torture the host in this one! Let's hear it for the mastermind behind this completely stupid random insanity fic about torturing people, penname Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs, the one, the only Godrina!
Audience: *single person claps*
Godrina: (Thank you, Kitsune of Light!) man, are you stupid, Keiko.
Keiko: T_T...can we just get on with the relentless bashing of Kuwabara and Joey?
Lina: why is Joey in this fic in the first place?
Godrina: BECAUSE I HATE JOEY AND HE STINKS!
Lina: allllllllllrighty then. Let's get Joey!
*sleeping Joey (who is hugging a teddy bear and wearing care bear pajamas) appears on the stage.*
Lina: Care Bears, AAH! MY EYES!
Godrina: me first!
Joey: No, I don't want to go to school today, mommy. I wanna stay home and bake cookies with you! (another insider joke... but I'm waaaaaaay too lazy to explain it.)
Lina, Keiko, and Botan: O.o
Sora: COFFEE COFFEE SUGAR SUGAR COFFEE!
Lina, Keiko, and Botan: O.o
Godrina: *rings a giant gong next to Joey while wearing earmuffs*
Sora: Holy *beep* that is loud!
*gong continues to vibrate until silence returns.*
Joey: *wakes up* no, mommy just five more minutes...snore...
Godrina: :O WHAT THE *BEEP*?
Keiko: O.O I guess he's still asleep.
Sora: COFFEE! *dumps hot coffee on Joey's face*
Lina: *whince* oi, that burns...and I'm a fire sorceress...
Joey: ahhh, nice shower, *snort*
Godrina: *eye twitch* that's not...normal...
Botan: that's it, I've had enough of you. You're all too crazy for me! *makes her paddle appear and tries to fly off, but is struck by lightning.* WHAT WAS THAT FOR?
Godrina: I just wanted to see you get struck by lightning.
Botan: but you did, in Bonds of Fire (the Yu-Yu Hakusho movie, IT ROCKS!!!) I get stuck by lightning in the thunderstorm while flying out of the spirit (that must've taken me like five tries to spell, rei is MUCH easier to spell) world.
Godrina: yeah, well, then the camera angle was bad.
Botan: you're so mean! O_O
Godrina: no, I just don't give a *beep* what happens to you, because you're scared of everything and I don't know why, aren't you the CRYPT KEEPER? YOU CAN'T DIE!
Botan: I'm not the crypt keeper, I'm the grim reaper.
Godrina: they're the same *beep* thing!
Botan: watch your mouth!
Godrina: around WHO? THIS IS A PLACE WHERE NO *beep* PERSON IN THEIR *beep* RIGHT MIND WOULD *beep* *beep* *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* WATCH THIS *beep* *beep* EXCUSE OF A TV SHOW! WHY? BECAUSE IT IS USUALLY HOSTED BY A *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep*!
Keiko: you shouldn't say such bad things about kuwabara.
Godrina: I CAN IF I *beep* WANT!!!
Botan: @_@
Keiko and Lina: O.o
Sora: SUGAR! *Dumps a GIANT bag of sugar out on Joey, completely burying him.*
Lina: Buncha ameturs...*digs through the sugar, and holds Joey's nose*
Joey: *still asleep* Boy, you sure know how to build a great sandcastle, Yugi, but do you hafta do it on my stomach?
Godrina: I know how to wake him up...*mentally, to Joey* Joey, there is cake here...
Joey: cake?
Godrina: yes, and pizza, and cookies....
Joey: *wakes up* (remember people, he's covered in sugar and coffee...) nnnhh, SUGAR! *begins to devour the sugar*
Godrina: Hehe, I still got the touch.
Keiko: what did you do?
Godrina: I am the authoress, I can make anything I want happen in my fics. *makes a coconut drop out of the sky and hit Keiko on the head*
Lina: O.o
Keiko: @_@
Godrina: ^_^
Lina:...please, don't hurt me, almighty authoress...
Godrina: *makes all the sugar dissappear*
Joey and Sora: T_T
Godrina: Don't worry, you're the only girl left besides me. But, I don't like how similar your powers are to mine, but I don't want to be left alone with all these boys...
Lina: -^_^-
Godrina: goes backstage, and drags Kuwabara out, who is tied to a chair.
Kuwabara: Is it time for the special surprise part of the show yet?
Lina: why, yes it is! *evil grin*
Godrina: *drags out a kiddie pool, that is about five feet deep because it goes into the stage, somehow...* uh huh! ^_^
Kuwabara: I don't like that look you're giving me...
Joey: COOK? WHERE? FOOD?
Godrina: *beginning to get annoyed* no...there is no food, Joey.
Joey: T_T awwww...
Lina: *hits Joey on the head with a frying pan* Yeah, no food.
Joey: @_@...
Lina: LET THE RELENTLESS BASHING CONTINUE!
Godrina: you scare me...
Lina: -^_^- that's a compliment.
Godrina: hn.
Kuwabara: WHAT THE *beep* IS GOING ON HERE?!?!
Lina: *holds up an extrodinairly cute kitten*
Godrina: Aww...I don't want to watch this...*disappears*
Sora: COFFEE! *dumps coffee on Kuwabara's head*
Kuwabara: Ow, that is hot...
Sora: I know! ^_^
Lina: alllrighty...ahem...
Kuwabara: It's Eicachi!
Lina: yes, and I don't think she can swim either...
Kuwabara: NO! DON'T DROP HER IN THERE!
Lina: -_- can I make this more fun? Please?
(oh, all right, just get on with it.)
*cardboard shark fins pop up in the kiddie pool*
Lina: you can do better than that...
(so?)
Lina: oh, forget it. Now, I don't think she will swim very well either, especially if the pool is full of sharks.
Kuwabara: NO! EICACHI!
Lina: yes, Eicachi. *drops cat in the pool*
Godrina: *appears, catches cat in midair, and puts a rock in it's place, and dumps red food coloring in the pool, all in a split second, then disappears, so no one could possibly have seen her* Yeah!
Kuwabara: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Lina: yes.
Godrina: *appears* that's it, I don't like you anymore, because you weren't supposed to REALLY drop the cat in, you were supposed to make it look like you did...but I had to jump in and save the poor thing's life! *snuggles kitten* ^_^ I love kittens...*makes a piano drop out of the sky and land on Lina*
Sora: Sugar?
Godrina: coffee.
Sora: ^_^ *runs off in search of a Starbucks*
Godrina: coming soon to a Starbucks near you, and insane final fantasy guy in search of coffee and sugar, courtesy of Godrina-of-the-Cyborgs and her muse, Shigara.
Kuwabara: wow, that was a pretty good surprise, but what happened?
Godrina: -_-
Kuwabara: I-*gets attacked by a flying gorilla*
Godrina: ^_^ That's all for this fic! I might write a season two if I get enough reviews or bored, which might not happen until next summer, which is when I have all my spare time. No kittens were harmed in the making of this fic, and if you actually took the time to read this! I LOVE YOU! No, not THAT way...oh well, does this explain it? *hands you a virtual cookie* You'll get another one if you review. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, REVIEW! TTFN! Ta Ta For Now!
