The lights from the ambulance were flashing brightly in the still-dark sky as Ryan rushed out of the pool house. He was well acquainted with emergency lights, having grown up in areas where such vehicles were more commonplace than ice cream trucks. He'd seen so much, maybe too much in his short life: gun shots, domestic abuse, rape, so as he turned the corner to look into Marissa's driveway, he felt sure that he wasn't going to be surprised by anything he was going to see.
But nothing had prepared Ryan for the sight of Marissa lying on a stretcher, looking as pale and limp as a rag doll. His heart froze in fear that maybe the paramedics were too late, but he met eyes with her father, who silently communicated that they had gotten to her in time. Ryan acknowledged the message, both men visibly shaken as they watched the EMTs wheel Marissa's lifeless body into the ambulance. Ryan's first instinct was to run to her, to reassure her and himself that she would be okay, but her family was standing close by and he didn't think they'd want him there. He wrapped his arms around his chilled body and watched the ambulance speed away, wishing he could be sitting with her instead of standing helpless in the driveway.
"So, uh, I'm sorry about Marissa. I can't believe she would try something as crazy as this."
Ryan spun around to see Seth standing behind him, clearly as shocked as he was. He didn't know what to say in response; he only knew that he had to do something, anything, to keep himself from going insane. He lit a cigarette that he got from his back pocket and took a long, hard drag.
"Do you think we should do something?" Seth asked moments later, "You know, like go to the hospital?"
Ryan shook his head and smiled ruefully. "I don't think Marissa would want me there. It would probably be better if I just stay away from her completely."
"Jeez, man! Enough with the melodrama already! I thought you and Marissa were getting along okay now… She totally digs you, and I'm sure she'd be really happy to see you at the-"
Ryan threw the smoldering cigarette on the ground and stomped on it hard. "I really, honestly don't think that would be such a good idea. I'm tired; I'm going back to the pool house." He walked past Seth, fully intending to find some liquor and drinking himself into a coma. What did his mother always used to say? "Reality is so much easier to live with when you're unconscious." A pained smile crept up his face at the thought of his mother. How ironic it seemed that he would ever take any of her advice.
---
Momentarily taken aback by his harsh tone, Seth watched Ryan walk back to the house like nothing was out of the ordinary. This wasn't at all how he thought Ryan would react to the news of Marissa being rushed to the hospital, and he was determined to find out what was up. Recalling that he didn't see Ryan after his grandfather's party, he began formulating theories in his overly imaginative head. He suddenly had a feeling that there was more to it than what his new brother was telling him.
He wandered into the pool house, surprised to find Ryan sitting at the bar, taking big gulps from a bottle of beer. He walked around the bar to discover several six-packs of beer, as well as an assortment of liquor, which his mother presumably forgot to remove after Ryan moved in. Drinking as the sun comes up, he thought to himself, nothing classier than that. He grabbed a beer and sat at the bar next to Ryan. "When my mom said this place needed some warmth, I didn't realize she meant the warmth that comes with being in a drunken stupor. Sure you don't want some Cap'n Crunch instead?"
"I'm really not in the mood for company right now, Seth." That wasn't entirely true, but Ryan didn't want to have to tell Seth how he had managed to mess everything up with Marissa. He needed time to think, as well as drink. But then again, it's never a good thing to drink on your own. He took a swig from his beer and waited to Seth to ask the inevitable questions.
"Dude, you know that whole tough guy thing doesn't scare me. We're brothers now; if you kick my ass, you'll be grounded, and while it's no juvie, it's still no fun." Seth took a drink from his bottle as well, wondering if he looked as tough as Ryan did. "So, are you going to tell me what happened, or will I have to pull some Japanese torture tactics on you?" He eyed Ryan expectantly, curious as to what could be troubling him.
Ryan returned Seth's gaze, wondering how he would react to everything that happened at his grandfather's party. He knew that Seth would be cool about everything, but there was still some fear that Seth would think less of him somehow if he knew about Gabby. But at this point, he really didn't have anything left to lose.
Seth listened patiently to Ryan's recount of the previous night's events, miraculously managing not to interrupt at any point. When Ryan was done, Seth was speechless for a moment, before exclaiming, "Ryan, that was awesome. I can't believe you made out with my grandmother!" At Ryan's discouraged glance, he quickly switched gears. "Uh, I mean, that really sucks about Marissa. The girl needs to learn how to knock, but I guess that's besides the point… I really thought things were going to work out for you two. God knows you've been sending each other enough smoldering looks since you got here." He reached over the counter to grab another beer. "But you can't just give up, you know. Marissa's lying in a hospital bed somewhere, and there must be something you can do to help her. Regardless of what happened between the two of you last night, Marissa needs you." And I think you need her, too, Seth almost said, but decided to keep to himself. No reason to get all sappy over some beer.
Ryan began peeling the label off of his beer bottle, trying to forget the look on Marissa's face when she discovered him in bed with Gabby. He would give anything to be able to turn back the clock, but he knew that there was no point in hoping for the impossible. Still, something inside him agreed with Seth, he couldn't just give up. She may never want to see him again, but he still wanted her to know that his feelings for her haven't changed. Maybe then she'd give him a chance to explain. Just one chance is all I need, Marissa. Don't give up on me yet.
