The Near-Getaway
A/N: You can tell I was watching the Kim Possible Marathon and the Simpsons when I wrote this...
Ten minutes later, Harry, Ron, and Hermione were dueling for their lives in a dark room deep underneath Draco's Evil Condo of Doom.
"How did we escape again?" Hermione asked, realizing she hadn't said anything in a while.
"I bit Manicotti." Ron replied.
"What'd it taste like?"
"It tasted like pure evil."
Harry arched an eyebrow. "...alrighty."
"Okay, think Bill's cooking."
They had vanquished all of Draco's cronies, who had conveniently attacked them one on one, and were standing, tense and tired, waiting for the next big wave of villains, or at least for one to jump off the floor and attack.
They didn't have to wait long as the ceiling crumbled away and Draco appeared in some sort of hovercraft, which boasted a huge ray.
"It looks bad. He's got some kind of ray!"
"What kind of ray?"
"Gravatonic!" Draco called down, waving excitedly.
"Gravatonic? Wow, you're wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend! Ha!" Ron shouted back. "Now THAT was a good one. Britney Spears is so easy to mock."
"Hurry, let's run up those stairs!"
"Wait!" Ron shouted. "Did you say 'hurry' or 'Harry'?"
"I said hurry, why?"
"Just wanted to make sure you hadn't forgotten about me. Hey, look! A get away car!"
"A get away car?" Harry rolled his eyes in an exasperated way. "She's not even trying anymore, is she?"
"Who?" Hermione and Ron were already in the car, waiting for Harry to jump into the driver's seat so they could speed away.
"Nothing." Harry sighed, climbing into the car. "Any weapons?"
"I found a gun!" Ron cried happily; finally, something seemed to be going good for them.
"Fire at will, Ron!"
"Who's Will?"
"Shut up and use the gun on Draco!"
He turned around, took careful aim at Draco's hovercraft...and chucked the gun at it. It bounced off with a small 'ding'.
Hermione twisted around in her seat, glaring at Ron, who was staring at his hands.
"You. Yeah, you. You don't get to do anything."
Despite all their evading and driving and working together and Ron's skill with guns, Harry, Ron, and Hermione were recaptured and being held, ironically enough, in the only Justice of the Peace's office within a hundred miles of Hogwarts.
It was also next door to a restaurant where Padma and some friends from legal aide had been eating dinner. And Padma just happened to be wearing a white dress. Not a good choice in a ribs joint, but she had never had good fashion taste.
Wait-maybe that wasn't as ironic as it could have been. But it was damn coincidental.
When Padma looked out the window and saw her poor friends behind tied to chairs by Draco-er, Padma? Padma! Where's Padma?
"You know, I never really knew any of them that well." She groused to a lawyer friend, gnawing on a rather large piece of meat. "I mean, sure, Hermione and I would compete for grades, and I went to Yule Ball with Ron, but we never hung out, we never talked, we never-"
Stayed on script?
Padma sighed. "Oh no. Harry, Ron, Hermione. They are captured. I must save them by sacrificing myself and wedding Draco."
Finally...er, Padma and friends marched straight away into the Justice of the Peace's office.
"Draco!" She called. "Draco! Fine! I'll marry you! But you must let Ron, Hermione, and Harry go first!"
"Yes!" Draco hugged Ron. "I'm gonna be loved! It worked! And just in time too, you guys were starting to smell." He sniffed. "Or it might have just been Ron, but you know..."
A/N: You can tell I was watching the Kim Possible Marathon and the Simpsons when I wrote this...
Ten minutes later, Harry, Ron, and Hermione were dueling for their lives in a dark room deep underneath Draco's Evil Condo of Doom.
"How did we escape again?" Hermione asked, realizing she hadn't said anything in a while.
"I bit Manicotti." Ron replied.
"What'd it taste like?"
"It tasted like pure evil."
Harry arched an eyebrow. "...alrighty."
"Okay, think Bill's cooking."
They had vanquished all of Draco's cronies, who had conveniently attacked them one on one, and were standing, tense and tired, waiting for the next big wave of villains, or at least for one to jump off the floor and attack.
They didn't have to wait long as the ceiling crumbled away and Draco appeared in some sort of hovercraft, which boasted a huge ray.
"It looks bad. He's got some kind of ray!"
"What kind of ray?"
"Gravatonic!" Draco called down, waving excitedly.
"Gravatonic? Wow, you're wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend! Ha!" Ron shouted back. "Now THAT was a good one. Britney Spears is so easy to mock."
"Hurry, let's run up those stairs!"
"Wait!" Ron shouted. "Did you say 'hurry' or 'Harry'?"
"I said hurry, why?"
"Just wanted to make sure you hadn't forgotten about me. Hey, look! A get away car!"
"A get away car?" Harry rolled his eyes in an exasperated way. "She's not even trying anymore, is she?"
"Who?" Hermione and Ron were already in the car, waiting for Harry to jump into the driver's seat so they could speed away.
"Nothing." Harry sighed, climbing into the car. "Any weapons?"
"I found a gun!" Ron cried happily; finally, something seemed to be going good for them.
"Fire at will, Ron!"
"Who's Will?"
"Shut up and use the gun on Draco!"
He turned around, took careful aim at Draco's hovercraft...and chucked the gun at it. It bounced off with a small 'ding'.
Hermione twisted around in her seat, glaring at Ron, who was staring at his hands.
"You. Yeah, you. You don't get to do anything."
Despite all their evading and driving and working together and Ron's skill with guns, Harry, Ron, and Hermione were recaptured and being held, ironically enough, in the only Justice of the Peace's office within a hundred miles of Hogwarts.
It was also next door to a restaurant where Padma and some friends from legal aide had been eating dinner. And Padma just happened to be wearing a white dress. Not a good choice in a ribs joint, but she had never had good fashion taste.
Wait-maybe that wasn't as ironic as it could have been. But it was damn coincidental.
When Padma looked out the window and saw her poor friends behind tied to chairs by Draco-er, Padma? Padma! Where's Padma?
"You know, I never really knew any of them that well." She groused to a lawyer friend, gnawing on a rather large piece of meat. "I mean, sure, Hermione and I would compete for grades, and I went to Yule Ball with Ron, but we never hung out, we never talked, we never-"
Stayed on script?
Padma sighed. "Oh no. Harry, Ron, Hermione. They are captured. I must save them by sacrificing myself and wedding Draco."
Finally...er, Padma and friends marched straight away into the Justice of the Peace's office.
"Draco!" She called. "Draco! Fine! I'll marry you! But you must let Ron, Hermione, and Harry go first!"
"Yes!" Draco hugged Ron. "I'm gonna be loved! It worked! And just in time too, you guys were starting to smell." He sniffed. "Or it might have just been Ron, but you know..."
