God would have it be Monday morning when I wake up. Actually, I don't think God had anything to do with this. I am pretty sure that this is my punishment from someone evil, possibly the devil

...

or my mother, for being a bad kid.

Speaking of the devil, My mother, the happy, loving, woman she is, awoke me by dropping ice cubes all over me. Sometimes I wonder if my mother is insane. I woke up screaming, and jumped out of my bed. This was cause for much merriment for her part, and she danced downstairs giggling as she went.

Why she was dancing I have no idea.

When I asked her about this at breakfast, she simply replied...

"Well D, it's hot out, it's almost summer...you know...summer, when it's hot...." She emphasized the word hot and then took the collar of her shirt and shook it. My lord.

Either my mother was hitting on me, which is a possibility, because she's had to live with my dad all these years, and thus has resorted to this, (My father is not an attractive man) or else...she is hinting to me that she thinks it's too hot for pants and I should be wearing shorts.

She made a point of looking at my pants.

I think my mother might be incestual. (After thinking that terrible thought; I popped two Tylenol, and then headed off to the car. My face still hurts from my swan dive down the stairs.)

Today I really don't feel well, and not just emotionally. I feel kind of sick still. I think I am coming down with something I knew I shouldn't have eaten that chicken fried rice. I will never again eat anything that is goopy unless it is pudding.

Even then I'll force feed it to Quatre first to make sure it's safe.

Uhh. Couldn't finish my breakfast.

...

Not that I ever do.

...

My mom is not a gifted chief.

However she let me sleep in, and then drove me to school...so her being cool in most other aspects of life make up for her lack of cooking ability. Except for her incestualness. That I could live happily without.

The car ride to school was peaceful enough, I kind of just sat there and watched the mountains from my seat as shotgun. My mom was listening to some stupid talk show, and giggling. The talk show people where making fun of teenagers, as the elderly like to do because they wish they where young again.

The radio show my mom listens to usually pisses me off because it's this old woman and her friend yakking on and on about how they would behave if they where kids again and stuff, and how parents don't raise their kids right and it's just so annoying to listen to mean old ladies bitch and bitch at that time of day. The topic this morning was how kids don't read enough, and when the old woman talk show host was at the movies, she saw some kids and the kids didn't know what the movie was about...the old woman talk show host was surprised because she read about the movie she was seeing in the paper.

"And don't you think that kids today should read the paper more..." blah blah blah...so what? I was thinking...kind of...because I was half asleep and kind of in a haze...'They don't read the movie review like you do lady. Big whoop. Maybe they read the important stuff.'

Anyway...the important part was...that I was half asleep the drive there, so when we pulled up to the curb my mom had to nudge me a little, and whisper loudly...

"D we're here..." and I mean really loudly. Like the 'stage whisper' that Quatre is always trying to prefect.

Ugggh...There she goes with the D thing. She tries to make these things that she thinks up nicknames, and it is weird, because sometimes I don't know who she is talking to. I yawned and hopped out, then turned around and shrugged my pack back on. As soon at I accepted the whole weight of the thing, my shoulder hunch down. I imagine that I looked like a depressed turtle at that moment.

A depressed turtle wearing army boots, who has just stepped out of his mother's purple mini van.

…

I need my license so badly.

As soon as I got out of the car, all the horrible feelings I had felt yesterday night resurfaced. It was awful. I felt like puking.

The first bell rang, after what seemed like a decade, most of that decade was spent getting a juice from the venting machine to calm down my stomach and chewing out Quatre. Actually...not so much chewing him out as ignoring him. I really didn't feel like screaming at him and making a scene. So I just walked right past him when I saw him. For a moment it seemed like he got the point.

"Duo I am SOOO sorry about last night..." Blah blah blah. He looked SOOO sorry. His eyes looked sad, and his lip pouted out a little.

Awww. Sad little rich boy.

There there.

I think I'll let him suffer until lunch, because I am just that big of an ass hole. And because I have more important things to do like drink a juice that needs drinking… and go to a class that needs going to.

I headed off without saying anything to him. I am not sure if he understood I was angry, because at that moment Trowa showed up, and Quatre was captured by his loving boyfriend. Trowa then started to eat his face.

GAGAGAGAAAGGGG!

I dragged my sorry ass off to my German class which is my first block of the day, and sat down.

I usually am late to class because my German teacher likes to make very bad jokes, and I tend to get in as little amount of time in there as humanly possible, but I saw Heero walking down the halls so I sped up.

I faced the dreaded jokes of my German teacher instead of my humiliation.

First thing I heard when I entered class; "If your an American when you enter the bathroom, and your American again when you leave, what were you while you where in there? Your a peein! Come on guys. Get it?" At that point my German teacher laughed very loudly and slapped the little podium in the front of the class room.

"Awwww. You guys are no fun. Ah, Mr. Maxwell, I see you are early. How kind of you to join us..."

My German teacher is a pretty nice guy though, even if his jokes are very very very bad, and quite often he tells us about how the Germans consider beer to be a health drink, (and how personally he thinks that in America kids should get to drink every once in a while.) because he never gives me tardies, or yells at me when I fall asleep in class.

First class of the day...was not so bad, I thought. Although I did feel like I was going to barf.

'That's usually not a good thing to do in German class...' I thought.

My German teacher was talking about youth hostels in Germany, and because I was feeling more sick then sleepy, I paid attention.

I sat there and tried to comprehend what my teacher was saying, and it helped me block out all thoughts of Heero, and last night, the destruction of my ego, and the impending puke.

My second block was math, which I had with Hilde. She kept trying to get me to talk about yesterday, but I wouldn't. Every time she said something to me I scooted away from her. Near the end of class I was in the teachers supply closet. My teacher noticed this, screamed at me and then sent me out into the hall. Fine. Didn't really like math class too much any way. I spend the last fifteen minutes in the hall, trying to stop from falling asleep against the lockers.

After class my math teacher came out with my bag, tossed it at me, and asked me if I knew why she had to punish me.

Oh I knew why, I knew exactually why she sent me out in the hall, it was not because I was being disruptive, not because I had really done something wrong...oh no no no...it was because there was a very large box of condoms in that closet, and the teacher next door, the same man who shares this supply closet, is a good looking thirty year old.

However I said no, and she shook her head.

"Duo....Duo....Duo...."

I winked at her and hurried off. She looked bewildered.

Perhaps she doesn't know that the condoms are there at all.

By third hour my Tylenol had started to wear off. I had almost forgotten all about my bruised and abused poor little lovely face of beauty, until that happened. I picked myself up and walked over to the teacher. I was in my ceramics class, so it's not like I had to do anything terribly important like taking notes. I had time to go off and see if I could find a cure for my pain. A cure for my facial pain at least, and that would be in the form of nerve numbing drug...but still.

My ceramics teacher is a jolly, old, (perhaps pot smoking) lady, who laughs and says "Sure..." a lot.

She let me go.

Much to the amazement of no one.

On my long and agonizing journey of about twenty four yards to the clinic something annoying happened.

I spotted the little pink moron herself. She was wearing her lovely little Abercrombie knock off clothing, complete with a hippy want to be jeans, little butt scarf thing that people put around their waists, long peasant sleeves on low necked ugly stripped shirt. Her shirt had light pink stripes all over it, and a little pink heart in the middle. Too much pink. And the neck line was something I looked at, momentarily before I realized how low it was.

I wonder who is trying to get Heero's attention. Sheesh. My face was pounding and I suddenly felt the urge to yack all over her. But that would have ruined her nice pink little outfit.

Seriously, way too much pink.

And she was glaring at me. As usual. Not that I wanted a warm and welcoming smile from her anyway, but I could have gone one day without her 'I am scared that you will take away my boyfriend, so I don't like you, but I pretend I do around my boyfriend so that I look good' looks. She pisses me off so much.

Fake little bitch.

Uhhh. I can't stand fake people.

Theeeeeeeeeeeeen...she opens her mouth to speak. Great. A conversation with Relena. This is consorting with the fake and annoying enemy. I should be shot by my superiors.

Right now.

In the leg.

I hope they hit a major artery.

Then I bleed to death in front of the school clinic.

And the nurse who I am friends with comes out and kind of kicks me with the toe of her boot.

"How was Quatre's party last night?" Her voice annoys me. Actually...it's not just her voice, but the little...needy I need to be loved attitude that she has annoys me.

It's like...she doesn't even like me. Why is she trying to be friendly to me? I really don't like her, and she knows that. Her glares are all subconsis-facial-manifestations, that she doesn't even know she's doing. She is so fake, and I know it. Why doesn't Heero know it?

"Fine. Didn't Heero tell you all about it?" I ask, and then walk into the clinic and slam the door before she could answer me.

Stupid fake annoying Relena.