CHAPTER TWO: Convince me please
"Than what am I?" Remus said nervously , his eyes coming back to his own very slowly, Sirius seemed not scared, but calm with Remus, and that had helped him a lot.
"Your Remus. That's who you are." Sirius said, not moving, or staring at Remus's scars, as most would do. He just watched Remus with a sense of care in his dark eyes.
Neither spoke at all, yet watched the other with contemplation. Remus hated Sirius, but he loved him too, he was always at home with him around, and they balanced each other out. Sirius loved Remus for being a strong and caring individual more than anyone he had ever known, yet he also hated Remus too, for the mere fact that Remus had hated himself all his life for what he was, how he always had said he was a monster, not a human. But he wasn't a monster, he was Remus J. Lupin.
"Why don't you clean yourself up and get dressed, we have to talk." Remus didn't move, but just stared at Sirius with malicious contempt in his eyes. Sirius locked eyes with him and scowled back at him. "Now. I mean it Remus, I'll be downstairs."
With those words, Remus turned and cleaned his bloody mess up, and fixed his hand with a simple healing spell, though he would have been thoroughly happy to watch himself bleed. He put on trousers and a shirt, and walked right pass the broken mirror, stopping only to look at it and chuckle.
Downstairs, Sirius had made tea and was waiting for Remus. He was looking worn down and more tired than ever, which made Remus' insides squirm at how mean he had been to him. "What time is it?" was all that Remus had managed to say.
"Six-thirty in the morning." Remus nodded and they both sat there, not looking at the other, an eerie quietness decided to take over them both for they didn't know what to say. It was seven o'clock before either had decided to say a single word. Sirius was the first to break the barrier.
"I did love her you know." He would not look at Remus, though he looked thoroughly amused with his cup which was now empty of all contents.
"I know you did." Remus said quietly, only for comfort; of all things to say it for.
"I'm sorry Remus." Sirius looked up at him, but Remus avoided his eyes. "I didn't mean to take her from you. I had no idea that..." Sirius trailed off and Remus looked him in the eyes.
"Yes you did." He said quietly. "You knew I loved her, don't lie." He wasn't being malicious or mean, for there was no sign of it in his monotonic voice. He was simply stating the truth.
"I know you did. I just... I did love her you know, I want you to know that."
"I know you did. You just didn't show it all the time..." He finished his words with "... you decided to be having fun with me instead."
Sirius didn't speak at first, but when he did, it could be heard that he was struggling to keep from yelling.
"I loved her... so much Remus, but I wasn't like you; I didn't know how to... how to show it. You were always the one to comfort her because I didn't know how to, it wasn't natural to help others; it wasn't in my blood. I remember so many nights I would hear her cry, and I felt so bad because I didn't know how comfort her."
"You could've tried."
"And I did try, but I felt; I did love her, more than anyone could say, she was everything to me, and when she died... I; I did love her."
"What about me? Why did you come to me so many nights instead of going to her? Did you think that might have hurt her, even though she said she didn't care, she always did things for others and you know that. So why did you come to me?"
"I was scared."
"Of what?"
"Voldemort is back you know." He had changed the subject and Lupin sat up straight in his chair, his heart racing.
"Jesus Sirius, how come you wait till now to tell me this?" He said, not mad but angered at his waiting.
"I tried to but I didn't know how. Harry was there when it happened."
"Is he okay?"
"He escaped, but Fudge doesn't believe Dumbledore's word and now the order is being called back Dumbledore told me to tell you we need to recall everyone. Severus is working on our side, and so is the Weasley's. I am thinking of letting Dumbledore use my parents old house for headquarters, we could stay there."
"We being... you and the Weasley's...?"
"and you. I want you to be there too, Harry can come and stay with us and..."
"I see you've had time to think it over then?" Remus said with a slight smile.
"Yes."
"Is it a good plan?" He said slyly
"What?" Said Sirius contemplating what the other had meant.
"I am asking you if you think it is a good plan or not." The other repeated
"Yes... I do think it good." He said defiantly to Remus, as if waiting for another argument, but it never came.
"Then I will. I'll move in with you. We need to get going then." Remus said through a smile, which was returned by Sirius, something Remus hadn't seen on his face in so many years.
That week was busy, what with proposing the idea to Albus and regaining the order to its position. A few new people had joined, including one person Sirius hadn't seen since they were a child.
"Nymphadora." Said Sirius into the girl's ear. She jumped and dropped the bottle she was holding, though she did not turn around at first. When she did, she jumped at him, almost knocking him over.
"Sirius! I've missed you so much!"
"I see you've changed, though the hair hasn't, why pink may I ask?" She playfully punched him in the stomach. "You've grown up so much. I can't believe it. I missed you too." Remus stepped up behind Sirius, smiling.
"Remus, haven't seen you in a long time either!"
"Fifteen years, how are you doing?"
"Wonderful, and you!" She said smiling.
"Good. Really good" He said, his eyes bright. Sirius looked at him disbelievingly.
"Than what am I?" Remus said nervously , his eyes coming back to his own very slowly, Sirius seemed not scared, but calm with Remus, and that had helped him a lot.
"Your Remus. That's who you are." Sirius said, not moving, or staring at Remus's scars, as most would do. He just watched Remus with a sense of care in his dark eyes.
Neither spoke at all, yet watched the other with contemplation. Remus hated Sirius, but he loved him too, he was always at home with him around, and they balanced each other out. Sirius loved Remus for being a strong and caring individual more than anyone he had ever known, yet he also hated Remus too, for the mere fact that Remus had hated himself all his life for what he was, how he always had said he was a monster, not a human. But he wasn't a monster, he was Remus J. Lupin.
"Why don't you clean yourself up and get dressed, we have to talk." Remus didn't move, but just stared at Sirius with malicious contempt in his eyes. Sirius locked eyes with him and scowled back at him. "Now. I mean it Remus, I'll be downstairs."
With those words, Remus turned and cleaned his bloody mess up, and fixed his hand with a simple healing spell, though he would have been thoroughly happy to watch himself bleed. He put on trousers and a shirt, and walked right pass the broken mirror, stopping only to look at it and chuckle.
Downstairs, Sirius had made tea and was waiting for Remus. He was looking worn down and more tired than ever, which made Remus' insides squirm at how mean he had been to him. "What time is it?" was all that Remus had managed to say.
"Six-thirty in the morning." Remus nodded and they both sat there, not looking at the other, an eerie quietness decided to take over them both for they didn't know what to say. It was seven o'clock before either had decided to say a single word. Sirius was the first to break the barrier.
"I did love her you know." He would not look at Remus, though he looked thoroughly amused with his cup which was now empty of all contents.
"I know you did." Remus said quietly, only for comfort; of all things to say it for.
"I'm sorry Remus." Sirius looked up at him, but Remus avoided his eyes. "I didn't mean to take her from you. I had no idea that..." Sirius trailed off and Remus looked him in the eyes.
"Yes you did." He said quietly. "You knew I loved her, don't lie." He wasn't being malicious or mean, for there was no sign of it in his monotonic voice. He was simply stating the truth.
"I know you did. I just... I did love her you know, I want you to know that."
"I know you did. You just didn't show it all the time..." He finished his words with "... you decided to be having fun with me instead."
Sirius didn't speak at first, but when he did, it could be heard that he was struggling to keep from yelling.
"I loved her... so much Remus, but I wasn't like you; I didn't know how to... how to show it. You were always the one to comfort her because I didn't know how to, it wasn't natural to help others; it wasn't in my blood. I remember so many nights I would hear her cry, and I felt so bad because I didn't know how comfort her."
"You could've tried."
"And I did try, but I felt; I did love her, more than anyone could say, she was everything to me, and when she died... I; I did love her."
"What about me? Why did you come to me so many nights instead of going to her? Did you think that might have hurt her, even though she said she didn't care, she always did things for others and you know that. So why did you come to me?"
"I was scared."
"Of what?"
"Voldemort is back you know." He had changed the subject and Lupin sat up straight in his chair, his heart racing.
"Jesus Sirius, how come you wait till now to tell me this?" He said, not mad but angered at his waiting.
"I tried to but I didn't know how. Harry was there when it happened."
"Is he okay?"
"He escaped, but Fudge doesn't believe Dumbledore's word and now the order is being called back Dumbledore told me to tell you we need to recall everyone. Severus is working on our side, and so is the Weasley's. I am thinking of letting Dumbledore use my parents old house for headquarters, we could stay there."
"We being... you and the Weasley's...?"
"and you. I want you to be there too, Harry can come and stay with us and..."
"I see you've had time to think it over then?" Remus said with a slight smile.
"Yes."
"Is it a good plan?" He said slyly
"What?" Said Sirius contemplating what the other had meant.
"I am asking you if you think it is a good plan or not." The other repeated
"Yes... I do think it good." He said defiantly to Remus, as if waiting for another argument, but it never came.
"Then I will. I'll move in with you. We need to get going then." Remus said through a smile, which was returned by Sirius, something Remus hadn't seen on his face in so many years.
That week was busy, what with proposing the idea to Albus and regaining the order to its position. A few new people had joined, including one person Sirius hadn't seen since they were a child.
"Nymphadora." Said Sirius into the girl's ear. She jumped and dropped the bottle she was holding, though she did not turn around at first. When she did, she jumped at him, almost knocking him over.
"Sirius! I've missed you so much!"
"I see you've changed, though the hair hasn't, why pink may I ask?" She playfully punched him in the stomach. "You've grown up so much. I can't believe it. I missed you too." Remus stepped up behind Sirius, smiling.
"Remus, haven't seen you in a long time either!"
"Fifteen years, how are you doing?"
"Wonderful, and you!" She said smiling.
"Good. Really good" He said, his eyes bright. Sirius looked at him disbelievingly.
