Gaius had to refer to the book he had given Merlin and his many anatomy texts. It had been so long since he had last used magic for healing. He didn't count the time he'd used magic for a potion to save Merlin. That had been a parlor trick compared to what was now required. The healing itself took even longer. By the time Gaius's limited strength had abandoned him, night had fallen and Arthur had long been asleep in his chair.

Gaius didn't know what to make of the young prince. While Arthur had never borne as much hatred towards magic as his father, he had no love for those who practiced it willingly. Gaius had seen Arthur order magic users' arrests and had heard his diatribes many times. His distrust had only grown with the rising threat of Morgana.

What had changed for him to now order Gaius to do magic? He would have done it regardless of the threat of death. He couldn't let his ward die if he could prevent it, but it was unnerving to perform magic under Arthur's stony watch. Had Arthur's fondness of Merlin been enough to change his mind? From the way he flinched when he looked at Merlin's face, Gaius wasn't so sure. He hoped he wasn't saving Merlin only for Arthur to publicly execute him.

Gaius examined his work as he rewrapped Merlin's wounds. He hadn't been able to do as much as he'd hoped, more than two decades without practice had left him rusty, but he prayed it would be enough to save Merlin's life. His breathing was clearer now than it had been before, the puncture wounds in his lungs repaired. The internal bleeding from the beatings had been stemmed and the blood sent back to its rightful places. The infection Gaius was unable to completely eradicate, but the crimson tendrils had faded and no longer spread up Merlin's neck.

When his strength returned, Gaius would see about removing the last of the infection and beginning to close the worst of the wounds, but that would have to wait for the morrow. Gaius wet a rag and placed it on Merlin's feverish brow then nudged Arthur to wake him. Arthur snorted loudly, but did not stir. Gaius nudged him again, but it was useless, Arthur wouldn't be moving any time soon.

Gaius sighed and fetched a pallet and bedding from Merlin's room. It was still disheveled from when he'd left. Gaius couldn't bring himself to clean it while Merlin had been missing. It had felt too much like giving up on him.

He made his bed by Merlin's side. Gaius doubted he'd be able to sleep. His ears strained to make sure Merlin was still breathing. But against his will, sleep took him the moment his head hit the pillow.

"Arthur, run! It's you she wants, run! I can hold her off. Arthur!"

Arthur jolted awake and for at first he didn't recognize his surroundings. It took a moment for him to remember drifting off as Gaius chanted over Merlin in some strange tongue.

"No, no!"

Arthur's eyes adjusted to the light of the candle on the nightstand by Merlin's head. Merlin was thrashing about with his glazed eyes wide open, trapped in whatever nightmare he was seeing.

Arthur could make out Gaius's sleeping form on the other side of Merlin. How he could sleep through Merlin's shouting Arthur couldn't understand.

Merlin screamed hoarsely and something shattered in the dark. Arthur knelt by the bed and grabbed a bandaged wrist that nearly collided with his face.

"Merlin," Arthur whispered. He said it again louder when Merlin didn't react. "Merlin, stop struggling, it's not real."

Merlin stopped struggling for a moment. His eyes slid to Arthur's face, but there was no light of recognition in them as he spoke. Arthur could hardly make out the words through Merlin's mangled voice. "She's going to kill Arthur, I have to stop her."

Guilt stabbed Arthur between the ribs. Merlin really had been trying to protect him all this time, enough that it was the subject of his nightmares?

"She's dead, Merlin. You killed her. I'm right here living because of you. Go back to sleep."

Merlin shook his head slowly. "You aren't real. None of this is real. Arthur's out there and she's going to kill him. I chose all wrong, I should've been there. She's going to kill him she's going to kill him she's"

Merlin's eyes drifted to the ceiling as he muttered. Tears leaked from the corners of his eyes. Arthur felt his forehead with the back of his hand. Sure enough, he was burning with fever, hotter than when they'd brought him to Gaius.

Arthur took the cloth lying on Merlin's pillow and drenched it again in water and pressed it to Merlin's brow. Merlin flinched at it, but Arthur held it in place until he had settled. Arthur searched for some more cloths and found them on a nearby table. He wet those too and placed them on Merlin's neck and wrists. Might as well make himself useful if he wasn't going to sleep.

He tried to talk Merlin down when he started shouting for Arthur to run again, but Merlin had only repeated what he'd said earlier Arthur wasn't real. He wanted to dismiss this as the delusion of a fevered brain, but the words sent a chill through him. What had Merlin gone through?

The damp cloths seemed to help at least though Arthur's assurances couldn't. Merlin's thrashing weakened and his eyelids drooped until sleep took over once more.

Merlin woke to the smell of crushed herbs and old wood. His thoughts were slow as if his mind was made of syrup. Pain….no that wasn't what he was feeling. Everything ached. That wasn't right, was it? It was supposed to be much worse than that. Morgana must have something special planned if she was muting his pain.

His heartbeat thundered in his ears as he waited for the pain to begin again. His fist clenched reflexively, but the movement was cut short by the restraints in his hands. He couldn't even move his fingers. He tried to jerk his legs but they were bound in place too. Paralysis. So that was her game this time. Panic gripped his throat. He couldn't breathe. The fire would return soon, he knew it, he-"

"Merlin?" someone said softly. That wasn't Arthur's voice, or Morgana's. He was dimly aware that he should know who it belonged to, but the harder he reached for the answer, the more it slipped away.

Merlin's eyelids twitched, but he clenched them shut. She was trying to trick him. If he opened his eyes, there'd undoubtedly be some fresh horror awaiting. Let him stay in the soft, painless dark a little while longer.

"Merlin, can you hear me?"

A wrinkled hand brushed against his forehead. He recognized that hand too. Merlin's eyes cracked open of their own accord. His heart sank.

"Gaius, not you too," Merlin croaked.

Up until this point, Morgana had left his uncle out of the illusions. She'd preferred to have Arthur and the knights in them instead.

The not-Gaius wrapped Merlin in his arms, squeezing just enough to send a slight jab of pain into Merlin's ribs. Merlin didn't react. This was where Morgana would reveal herself. She'd turn into Gaius and gut him like a fish, or Gaius would become a swarm of spiders gnawing at his flesh, or maybe he'd simply be killed by Morgana while Merlin watched.

Merlin could take that. He knew they were all illusions, it didn't matter how much they screamed so long as he wasn't in pain. Merlin would have to act upset though, or maybe she'd give up on the illusions and go back to torturing him.

The not-Gaius pulled out of the hug and sat on the stool by Merlin's cot. He smiled fondly at him.

"It's good to have you back, my boy. You gave us quite a fright. How are you feeling?"

Merlin didn't bother to answer, he scanned his surroundings as best he could trapped on the bed as he was. Morgana had done a good job with this one. It looked just like his and Gaius's chambers right down to the smells. The threat was here somewhere.

"I suppose it's to be expected you are a little disoriented. You've been out for ten days and have half a dozen medicines in your system. It might take a bit for you to fully wake up." The not-Gaius said in a light tone.

Merlin couldn't take the suspense anymore. "Alright, Morgana, I know you're here! Enough with the games. Just do something already!"

The not-Gaius's face crumpled. He pressed a hand on Merlin's shoulder. "Morgana's dead, Merlin. You aren't there anymore. You're safe now."

Merlin tried to scoot away from the not-Gaius, but was once again stopped by the restraints. They looked like splints in this illusion. Merlin was impressed with how accurate this one was. He didn't think Morgana knew anything about medicine. Or she was so far inside his head she could use his mind to fill in the gaps in her knowledge.

"Of course she'd make you say that. You are just a part of the illusion," Merlin said casually then shouted into the air again. "You think I'll let my guard down again so you can break me, do you, Morgana? It won't work, I'm not going to fall for it again."

Still no Morgana appeared. He didn't even feel pain as punishment for his words. She was very committed to this, wasn't she?

Not-Gaius's eyes watered. "Morgana got inside your head?"

Merlin scoffed. "Of course she did. You already know that."

"Can you tell me what they were like? What did she show you? Perhaps there was a tell in the illusions, some way we can prove to you this is reality."

"I'm not stupid, Gaius. Even if there was a tell, Morgana is just using you to cover it up."

Not-Gaius sighed. "Then we will just have to let time convince you. There won't be any more pain, Merlin. I promise."

He clasped a hand gently around Merlin's.

"I should warn you that Arthur knows about you having magic. He ordered me to inform him when you awoke and I suspect he hasn't completely forgiven you, or anyone else for that matter, yet."

Merlin would've panicked if any of this was real. As it was, he merely accepted the soup not-Gaius fed him, annoyed that he couldn't persuade him to remove the splints. He had to admit getting to taste food again and his stomach not cramping with hunger were nice, even if it was imaginary.

Merlin spent most of the day dozing and waiting for Morgana to get bored of the charade. He probably should have stayed alert, but his eyelids felt like they were made out of lead and his thoughts struggled to move through his mind.

Merlin woke to a familiar voice talking with not-Gaius. Equal parts fear and anticipation gripped his heart. Waiting for Arthur to make his appearance had taken an awful long time, he'd almost been convinced that this was reality.

"Leave us, Gaius. I need to speak with him alone."

"Arthur, he's not in his right mind, surely this can wait for-"

"No. This conversation happens now."

Not-Gaius sighed. "Very well, sure."

Merlin heard the door close and the sound of Arthur's footsteps. They stopped and wood scraped against stone. Merlin opened his eyes to see Arthur glaring at him. Merlin returned the sentiment.

"You lied to me."

Merlin shoved himself into as much of a sitting position as he could manage, something that was difficult to do when all one's limbs were stiff as a board and one's torso was almost equal parts bandaging as it was flesh.

"You going to kill me then?" Merlin asked bluntly.

"You haven't left me much of a choice!" Arthur exclaimed. "You knowingly practiced magic in Camelot for years in full knowledge of the laws and consequences of it and have led my best men to commit treason. How can I call myself a prince of Camelot if I don't uphold its honor? What would you have me do?"

Arthur's face darkened when Merlin stared flatley at him in response. "Aren't you going to defend yourself?"

"What's the point?" Merlin laughed bitterly. "You've made up your mind about magic and about me. There's nothing I can say to change it."

Arthur shot up, sending the stool clattering to the ground. "The point?" he shouted. "The point is that my best friend has been lying to me for years and everyone knew about it but me! The point is that I've been trying to reconcile who you are with the man I thought you were. The point is that I'm desperate for a reason not to send everyone I care about to their deaths and you are the only person who can stop me."

A chill wracked Merlin's body. A familiar voice whispered in his ear. This is real. The knowledge hit Merlin in the gut. If this really was happening, Arthur was going to kill others too? Everyone Arthur cared about, but…

"The knights know?" Merlin found himself asking.

"Yes, they all know," Arthur spat. "And every one of them chose you over their sacred duty. Gaius too. And Guinevere. Do you have any idea what you've put me through these past couple of weeks? Do you know what it's like to have everyone you know betray you?"

Now Merlin was seeing red. "What you've been through? I just woke up after being tortured by Morgana for gods know how long and its not even the first time I was tortured. I have spent years risking my life every waking moment for you. I've drunk poison, been captured, stabbed, shot, attacked by countless magical creatures and people all while knowing if you knew who I really was you would kill me. Do you really think that you'd have let me live if I'd told you the truth the day we met?"

Arthur didn't speak. They both knew the answer.

Merlin continued. "And you feel like I've betrayed you? You betrayed me every time you stood by and let your father kill innocent people for magic. Do you think we all chose to be this way, Arthur? Morgana betrayed you because she couldn't control her ability to see the future and she feared that if you or Uther found out, she would be killed. She was right. She and I helped a druid child escape Camelot because even children are not shown mercy. And I was born with magic, I was using it before I could walk. I grew up knowing my mother and I would be cast out of our village or killed by our neighbors for something beyond my control."

Arthur's face went pale. "You-you didn't choose this?" he asked weakly.

"I didn't."

Arthur sunk to the ground. "All this time, I thought… I thought sorcery was evil. But if you didn't choose this…"

"There is no evil in sorcery, only in the hearts of men," Merlin replied

Arthur chuckled, but his face didn't lose its pallor or far away stare. "You sound like an old man spouting proverbs."

"And you sound like a clotpole," Merlin said with a ghost of a smile.

"I had Gaius use magic to heal you," Arthur said.

"What?"

"You were dying," Arthur explained. "I hated you, but I couldn't let you die, not after all the knights told me about what you've done for me. So I asked Gaius to save you. I guess that makes me a hypocrite, doesn't it?"

"Definitely," Merlin assured him, but the grin on his face took all the sting out of it.

"I can't keep magic banned now, can I?"

"Not unless you want to order your own execution for treason," Merlin said helpfully.

Arthur got up off the floor and dusted himself off. "I should go tell Gaius he can return, he's probably convinced I've killed you. You should've seen how defensive he was every time I visited."

Merlin nodded, a bad idea it turned out as it set his head spinning. Arthur opened the door then hesitated.

"Merlin?"

"Yes, Arthur?"

"Thank you. For everything."

The door closed behind him and for the first time in a very long while, Merlin felt relief. Morgana would never have made an illusion like this. Kilgara's voice rang in Merlin's mind. The choice has been made.

Morgana crowed with laughter as Merlin's blood boiled. He would've screamed if he wasn't choking on his own blood. He was a fool to think the dream had been real. Every fiber of his being screamed in agony. He couldn't take it any more, he couldn't!

Merlin woke up in a sheen of cold sweat. His bed was drenched in it. His breathing came in shuddering gasps. The scars where Morgana's chains had once bound and pierced him throbbed with the ghost of his pain. He felt the blanket twisted at his feet. He ran his fingers over it focused on the feel of the stitching on his fingers. He felt the straw in the mattress poking his skin. Looking up at the ceiling, he counted the strips of wood across it. 48 across.

Merlin brushed the damp hair from his forehead then went about his morning routine. At least today wasn't one of the days when his senses betrayed him even in his waking hours. Those were getting less frequent, but it didn't make them any less terrifying.

He stood by Arthur's side in the throne room in clothes finer than he'd ever worn before. His tunic was made out of real cotton dyed royal blue trimmed with silver thread. He resisted the urge to squirm under the eyes of so many noblemen and peasants alike. He supposed he would need to get used to that now. He spotted Gwaine in the crowd, who gave him an eager thumbs up. Merlin smiled.

Arthur wore his father's circlet on his head and his pendant around his neck. His clothing was even finer than Merlin's. To Arthur's right sat Guinevere. She fiddled with the ring on her finger, still unused to the weight of it on her hand.

Arthur addressed the court. "Today marks the end of our mourning period for the late King Uther. He was a great and just king, who deeply loved his people, a fact that we must never forget. However, he was also a man who made mistakes. Mistakes I vow to correct to the best of my ability as king to ensure a future of peace and prosperity in Camelot. Today the foremost of these changes is to take place. Let it be known throughout all of Camelot that from this day forward, magic is no longer banned under penalty of death."

Nobility and peasantry alike gasped and murmured at the news, most with looks ranging from worry to disgust to horror. Only those that had known Merlin's secret along with a small handful of townspeople celebrated the news.

"I understand that magic has long been feared and its practitioners shunned," Arthur continued. The crowd silenced. "But it was not too long ago that Camelot was a land unplagued by the threat of evil sorcerers and creatures, a time where magic users could practice freely and use their gifts to heal, make harvests bountiful, and protect our lands from attack. It was the very banning of magic that opened our kingdom to the dangers of it, as a kingdom without an army welcomes invasion. We must push past our fear and uncertainty, and must not punish those who have only used their gifts for good."

"Today I appoint Merlin to the position of Court Sorcerer. He is an honorable man who risked his life countless times on behalf of myself and of Camelot using magic even though his kind were persecuted. Under his guidance, we will end the enmity between those with magic and those without."

Arthur raised his fist. "To a new age!"

The crowd echoed the cry. "To a new age!"