The Devil You Don't Episode 01: Freshmen
Teaser
Buffy paced relentlessly between two rows of headstones, eyes glued to the ground, tossing a stake back and forth between her hands. She was wearing a gray tank top under a black hooded sweatshirt, along with black jeans and sneakers. She had been trying to wear more easily washed clothes out on patrol recently. After all, she reasoned, she was going to be responsible for her own laundry very soon, and she wasn't sure she could work the same miracles her mom did getting out the blood stains.
Buffy's pacing had begun to wear a faint path in the grass. Keep in mind, the groundskeepers of Sunnydale's numerous cemeteries took great pride in the quality of their grass. The Sunnydale Cemetery Workers' Association even awarded a prize for the best turf at their annual dinner. Because of that, the grass in a Sunnydale cemetery was almost as durable as what you'd find on a professional sports field. Wearing a path in this grass, even a faint one, required a lot of effort.
Buffy was making that effort and then some. She had already staked two vamps that night, but that hadn't helped her mood any. "So much for 'kicking ass is comfort food,'" she thought sardonically as she scuffed her feet back and forth. She finally stopped her incessant pacing, scowled and looked down at the grave of David White, who was supposed to rise tonight.
Buffy spoke without looking up. "Anything?"
At Buffy's question, Giles stopped what he was doing and looked up. He was facing Buffy, standing behind a chest-high monument one row over from where she stood. He had been flipping through a large book that rested on the broad, flat top of the monument, occasionally making notes on a pad of paper resting off to the side.
"Nothing that you want to hear," Giles replied quietly. Buffy sighed audibly and resumed her pacing.
Giles stopped leafing through the book and walked around to the other side of the monument. He did that in part to remove the physical barrier between himself and his Slayer, but also to give himself a chance to prepare what he wanted to say. He took off his glasses and began cleaning them, as was his custom when approaching a difficult subject.
"Buffy, you soundly rejected all my previous suggestions. I'm loath to make any more," Giles said to his glasses. The conversation having begun, he put his handkerchief away, put his glasses back on and looked up.
Buffy stopped pacing and looked up at him for the first time in this conversation, a wry grin on her face. "You're loath? I made you loath? How'd I do that? I'm not even sure what loath means."
Giles sighed to himself. He would never tell Buffy this, but he wished she didn't feel the need to pretend she knew less that she did, even when joking. No one got the kind of SAT scores Buffy did without knowing full well what "loath" meant.
Bringing his mind back to the conversation at hand, Giles decided to take the direct approach. "If it wasn't obvious before, it's obvious now that our academic tastes are, at the very least, incompatible, if not completely opposite. Asking me to help you select your classes is like..."
Buffy took advantage of the pause. "...asking Xander to help me pick out clothes? No; he'd probably enjoy himself way too much. Ooh, I know! Asking Angel to help me pick out a new man?"
Giles, a bit taken aback by Buffy's last comment, leaned back against the large monument he had been behind earlier. This was the first time he'd heard Buffy refer to her potential objects of affection as men instead of boys, and he wasn't sure he liked the change. Bringing his attention back to the conversation again, he sighed and forged ahead. "Either of those will do. If you already knew this wouldn't work, why did you ask me for help?"
Now it was Buffy's turn to sigh. She turned her back on David White's grave and began walking towards Giles as she spoke. "Because I have no idea what I'm doing. And whenever that happens, I come to you."
Giles looked very pleased, in a reserved British way. Buffy caught the look in his eye, and couldn't resist a little dig. "Of course, the fact that no else's around might have something to do with it, too."
Giles's gaze went from pleased to concerned. He knew Buffy's comment was meant to be playful, but Giles also knew there was a bitter truth in there as well. Angel had left right after graduation, leaving no word as to his whereabouts. Cordelia left for Los Angeles not long after that, and then Xander left for his trip. Neither Slayerette had seen fit to contact anyone since they left. Willow and Oz had valiantly tried to give Buffy as much of their time as they could, but there was no mistaking that their priority was each other. And after Willow started at Crestwood two weeks ago, it became painfully obvious to Giles that Buffy was feeling abandoned.
Giles knew full well that this was a normal side effect of the transition to university life, and that Buffy would have a new social set soon enough. The problem was that she was also the Slayer. Giles had come to firmly believe that the reason why Buffy had been such an exemplary Slayer was because she maintained a strong connection to the real world through her friends and mother. The last thing he wanted was for Buffy to lose the strength and motivation she drew from that connection, even if it was just for a while. All it would take would be one moment of weakness...Giles stopped that line of thought before it went further than he was comfortable with. He fervently hoped that the moment he dare not think of would not come anytime soon.
As soon as he learned of Angel, Xander and Cordelia's post-graduation plans, Giles began drawing up a list of tasks and training to keep Buffy occupied over the summer, hoping to make up for their absence with activity. Fortunately, it had been a surprisingly eventful summer supernaturally, and he hadn't needed to force the issue too much. Things had finally calmed down a bit a couple of weeks ago, just when Willow started university.
Before he'd even had a chance to start in on his list of tasks and training, Giles was surprised to find Buffy making suggestions of things she could do. She had volunteered to help Giles organize the boxes of books he had taken out of the library before graduation. She had spent time exploring possible locations where they could restart her physical training in privacy, now that the library was gone. She had even volunteered to begin working on the more mental aspects of her training, including working with crystals. It was this suggestion that finally convinced Giles that Buffy was doing more than just feeling abandoned. She was procrastinating.
He had discovered, after a little pointed questioning, that Buffy had done almost nothing to prepare for university. She was late picking her classes and she hadn't turned in her room assignment forms. Giles had gotten her to turn in her housing paperwork last week, but getting her to fill out her class selection sheet had been like pulling teeth. He finally decided the only way this would get done is if he took the materials on patrol with her. Giles knew that she wouldn't run away from her duty, and that afforded him the opportunity to talk to her about her classes between vampires. Of course, he had not realized how badly his attempts to help in this process would go.
Giles decided talking about classes was not going to yield any better results tonight. He decided instead to address his abandonment concerns. "Buffy," Giles began, "you know I'm not a part of the Council any more..."
Buffy looked confused at the apparent subject change. "Yeaaah..."
"And that technically, Wesley is still your Watcher," Giles continued.
Buffy obviously didn't like where this conversation was going, and was starting to fidget. "Yeah, but he left town right after graduation for who knows where, so, not doing so well with the watching. What's your point, Giles?"
Giles looked intently at the Slayer, until she met his gaze. "Buffy, I want you to know that I will always consider myself your Watcher. I will be here for you, whenever you need me."
Buffy looked pleased for a moment, but her face fell a little when it was obvious that Giles had more to say. "There's a 'but' approaching, isn't there?"
Giles sighed. He seemed to be doing that a lot tonight. He ignored Buffy's comment and soldiered on. "However," he emphasized, garnering a small smile from Buffy for avoiding using "but," "there are certain things I can't help you with. I can't help you pick out new clothes. I certainly don't want to talk about boys with you. I apparently can't be helpful when it comes to selecting classes that will appeal to your conflicting desires that they be interesting and yet non-demanding, and not fall before 11 a.m. I can't..."
"I get the point, Giles," Buffy interrupted, with a combination of resignation and irritation. She walked over to the monument Giles was leaning against, and stepped up on the six-inch wide lip running around the base so she could easily grab her course catalog. Once she had both feet on the lip she paused, then seemed to change her reason for being there and folded her arms, resting them on top on top of the monument, which thanks to the lip she was standing on came up to her armpits. She rested her chin on her forearms, and gazed out at the mausoleums and crypts in the southern part of the cemetery. "You want me to find some kids my own age to play with," Buffy said, with a slight pout in her voice.
Giles turned around so they were both facing the same direction. Instead of looking at her as they continued talking, Giles joined her in looking out at nothing in particular. "Buffy, you are going to be starting university in a matter of days. You will be thrown into unfamiliar situations, with unfamiliar people. There will be plenty of opportunities for you to, as you say, 'find kids your own age' with which to play. However, as we discussed earlier, you will need to be more careful this time to hide your identity as the Slayer from your classmates."
"Giles, you know that none of that was my fault. Xander overheard, I had to save Willow, and everything just blew up from there."
As Giles and Buffy continued to debate the question of whether or not Buffy even knew how to protect a secret identity, a hand burst through the ground in front of David White's tombstone. Unfortunately, as they had their backs turned and were engrossed in their conversation, neither Giles nor Buffy noticed as the former David White, investment banker, clawed his way out of the ground, enjoying his first few moments as David White, vampire. Not believing his luck, Mr. White hurried his ascent so he could get to the two tasty treats that fate had left for his first meal.
"Please, Buffy," Giles said, still not hearing the vampire, "all I'm trying to say is that you will need to be as cautious as possible around everyone regarding your identity as the Slayer while you are at university." Buffy gave him a look that said "Duh!" louder than words. "But," Giles continued, ignoring the look, "at the same time, you need to be as open as possible to new experiences, and making new friends. And I'm afraid that if you rely on me to fill too many roles in your life, just because I know you're the Slayer and that makes things easier, you might miss out on the joys that can be found socializing with your contemporaries." Although he was stating his concerns regarding Buffy's willingness to make new friends out loud for the first time, Giles decided not to give voice to his fear that not having a strong circle of friends might make her more vulnerable. No point in adding to her fear, Giles thought.
"So, what you're saying is you're worried I'm not going to go out and party enough?" Buffy paused for a moment, taking that in. "Wow. That is about as far away from Mom's before-college talk as you can get," Buffy smiled.
"Yes, well, your Mother sees a different side of you than I," Giles smiled back.
Buffy lifted her head off of her arms as she unfolded them, took the course catalog in her hands, and sighed. "I just wish life was as easy as slaying, ya know? Slaying just so...I don't know..."
"Simple?" Giles suggested.
"Yeah, simple will do. I see a vamp, I stake a vamp." Mr. White had finally gotten out of the ground a few seconds before and started towards his meal, but paused to listen once he heard Buffy use "stake" and "vamp" in the same sentence. "There's no question of choice...except when it was Angel, but you know what I mean. I am the Vampire Slayer, so I kill vampires." Showing a remarkable amount of common sense for a newly-risen vampire, Mr. White decided to find his first meal elsewhere and started to slowly back away. "Nobody's asking me what kind of Slayer I want to be in a few years, or what I should do to prepare to get there. I know how to do what I need to do, and I have you for the things I don't know. But college?" At this, she tossed the course catalog over her head, almost hitting Mr. White, who turned and began to creep away more quickly. "I have no idea."
"Buffy, you really shouldn't worry so much." Giles responded. "The vast majority of students entering university have no idea what they want to do once they are finished, and those who think they do often change their minds before they are done. No one wants you to commit to a certain path right now. You do need to make some choices, and those choices by definition are going to limit what you can do next. All you can do is make the best choices you can based on what you know and feel now."
Another big sigh escaped Buffy's lips. It had been a sighing kind of night for everyone. "I know, Giles, I know. I've just got to buckle down and make some choices. But thanks for the pep talk." She turned towards Mr. White's grave, just in time to see Mr. White upgrade his escape pace from a creep to a dead run. "There you are!" Buffy said, the life back in her voice, resignation gone for now. "Don't you know it's not nice to keep a girl waiting?"
Buffy tore off at a full sprint after Mr. White. After just a few paces, her left foot landed on the course catalog she had tossed away earlier. The catalog skidded to Buffy's left along the surface of the grass that she had worn down pacing, taking Buffy's left foot with it. She lost her balance entirely and pitched forward, landing awkwardly on her right shoulder.
"Buffy!" Giles called, as he hurried to her side, sparing a glance at the back of the rapidly retreating vampire as he did so. "Are you hurt?"
"Just my pride," muttered Buffy into the ground. She tried to roll off her right side onto her stomach to get into a better position to push herself up off the ground, and gave a surprised squeal as pain seemed to burst from her right shoulder and radiate both down her arm and into her torso. She continued the roll until she was on her left side, and then she carefully sat up using her left arm for leverage against the ground. The pain in her right shoulder seemed tolerable, as long as she didn't move her right arm. "My pride lives in my right shoulder, apparently," Buffy said through gritted teeth.
Giles made a few knowing grunts and mm-hmms as he examined Buffy shoulder, earning a few yelps from his Slayer as he prodded the shoulder and attempted to move the arm. "Well, Buffy, you haven't dislocated it, which is actually unfortunate. A dislocated shoulder would be pretty easy to pop back in. It looks like you severely sprained the ligaments and tendons. It will take a while for those to heal, even with your Slayer healing."
"What does that mean?" Buffy asked, her jaw beginning to ache as well from the stress caused by grinding her teeth while Giles examined her.
Giles helped Buffy up, careful to avoid jostling her needlessly. "I think you need to get right home, ice that shoulder, and you'll probably need to keep it in a sling for a few days."
"A few days?" Buffy cried. "You mean I'll be in a sling on my first day of college?" Buffy started pacing, then stopped when she realized it was making the pain worse by jarring the shoulder. She put the energy she couldn't expend physically into the rising agitation in her voice. "This is terrible! I'm going to end up with some stupid nickname, like Lefty, or Sling Blade, and everyone will call me that forever, even at reunions. How can I work on being stealth girl and fitting in when everyone's going to notice me?"
Giles, being well acquainted with the moods of his Slayer, wisely said nothing and let her continue her rant as he guided her carefully out of the cemetery.
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Buffy got out of her mother's black Jeep Grand Cherokee, grabbed her duffel bag out of the back seat with her left hand, and carefully hoisted it onto her left shoulder.
"Are you sure you don't want me to help you with that, honey?" Joyce Summers called from the driver's seat.
"Do you have any idea what having my Mommy walk me to my dorm on my first day will do to my reputation?" Buffy looked into the car from the passenger side window, and noticed Joyce's slightly crestfallen look. "Besides, I don't want to have too many grad students asking me for my Mom's phone number. That's just icky."
Joyce smiled at Buffy's compliment. "Oh, I don't know, dear. I really could use a strong young man around the house. There are so many things I could think of for him to do..."
Buffy cringed. "Eww. No going Mrs. Robinson on me, Mom. I don't think I could deal."
Joyce gave a theatrical sigh. "If you insist, sweetie. You'll be by for the rest of your stuff later?"
"Yeah, Oz is going to lend a hand, and a van, too. We'll be by later this afternoon."
"Okay, see you then. And sweetie?"
"Yes, Mom?"
"Have fun."
With that, Joyce drove off, headed back into the center of town and the gallery. Buffy turned from the sidewalk and trudged up the dozen or so concrete steps to the main part of the campus, keeping her head down as she concentrated on not moving too quickly and accidentally jarring her shoulder. "Damn," Buffy thought to herself, "I hope I don't have to answer too many questions about the sling. The last thing I want to be is the center of attention."
Just as that thought finished going through her head, Buffy crested the steps and looked up at the main campus quad. It was literally full of people. There were rivers of students winding this way and that, all seeming to know where they were going. She saw several tables along the main walkway with signs over them for various organizations, ranging from the UCS GaLeBiTran Student Union (which she would later learn stood for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered, though most people just called the group Galebi) to the Conservative Society. Some students seemed to be following leaders around, others seemed to be milling around with friends, but everyone seemed to know where they were going, or what they were doing. Buffy didn't think she had felt so out of place in her entire life.
As she waded into the throng of people, headed towards where she thought the dorm check-in was, Buffy thought, "Well, so much for being the center of attention."
