The first thing Bosco did when he entered his own home was open up his liquor cabinet and pull out a gallon bottle of bourbon. He didn't even bother with a glass, he drank it straight out. Jenna watched from the door, her eyes wide with shock at how much he was drinking and how he was drinking it. She walked over and quickly pulled it out of his hand.

"Maurice! Haven't you had enough to drink tonight?" She poured the remaining liquid down the sink, keeping her eyes on him as she did it.

"Don't do that! Why'd you dump that all out?" His voice was whiney as he pulled the empty bottle from her grasp. "This is none of your business Jenna!"

She rolled her eyes and placed her hand on her hip. "None of my business? Maurice, you come to me, tell me about it, and then you say it's none of my business? That makes no sense at all!" She threw her hands in the air and walked into the living room.

He sat down at the kitchen table and put his head in his hands. All he wanted was to be alone. To wallow in his self pity alone. He looked over at his answering machine and noticed the red light blinking and he pressed 'play'. Faith's mother's message filled the silent gap.

He stared down at the machine, even when the message was done playing. The apartment fell silent again. His breathing grew heavy as he felt Jenna touch his arm. "I'm so sorry Maurice."

He slid down to the floor and crouched into a fetal position. Tears fell like waterfalls from his eyes. "I told you she was dead!" He closed his eyes tightly and let out a light scream. "I told you Jenna."

She sat down beside him, not really sure what to say. "Maurice..."

"Just shut up! Just don't talk!" He pushed her hand away. "Get out of my house Jenna."

She stood up. "I don't want to leave you here alone."

He looked up at her, his eyes red and watery. "Well I don't want you here." He stood up and looked her straight in the eye. "I'm not going to tell you again, get out of my house."

She didn't move. Tears began to fall down her cheeks. For some reason she felt used, like Bosco only wanted her for one thing. She quickly wiped them away with the back of her hand. "Maurice, I'm not leaving." She knew he'd do something crazy if he were alone, he just wasn't thinking straight enough to be alone.

He gritted his teeth. "I've asked you to leave and you won't." He walked towards her, his hands in tight fists. She backed up, realizing Bosco was quite upset. "Now I guess I'm going to have to make you leave." He pulled his right hand back, bracing himself to hit her.

She flinched, a cry erupting from her mouth. "Maurice, no!!"

Her cry was too late, he had hit her. Hit her across the face and he couldn't take it back. He looked down at her as she fell to her knees, her nose bleeding from the blow he had sent to her. His fists were still clenched tight together.

"Get out of my house." His voice was rough and raspy.

She stood up again. "Goodbye Maurice." She wiped the blood away and left, slamming the door as hard as she could behind her.

~~

Bosco watched as Jenna exited, the door echo startling him. He crouched back down into a fetal position and stared down at the empty bottle of bourbon that lay near him. He glanced down at his fists that were still clenched tight but relaxing somewhat. He noticed a few blood spots across the knuckle of his right hand and wiped them away quickly with the front of his shirt.

He had done it. Done something he had told himself one thousand times he wouldn't do. He hit a woman. He had gotten violent with the love of his life and now she was gone with the slam of a door. Tears began to flow down his cheeks. He wiped them away and stood up.

He couldn't think of anything else to do so he rummaged through his liquor cabinet in search of anything. Every bottle he came across was empty, not a single drop of alcohol for his tongue to taste.

He grabbed his jacket and headed out to whichever bar his feet led him too.

~~

Bosco staggered up to his mom's bar about forty-five minutes later and noticed the 'closed' sign on the door but he entered anyway. She had let him in after close many times before.

She didn't even turn around to see who it was but spoke through puffs of her cigarette. "Bar is closed, come back tomorrow."

Bosco rolled his eyes and walked up to the bar. "Ma, can I have a drink?"

Rose turned around slowly, recognizing her oldest son's voice almost instantly. She extinguished the slender, white, cancer causing Marlboro. She noticed he was in deep trouble by the way he looked. Sunken eyes, scraggily whiskers, bloodshot eyes. It was all too familiar for her from the past with his father.

"Maurice, you don't need a drink." She nodded her head.

He slapped his hands flat on the counter top. "I NEED a drink."

She grabbed his face, clenching his cheeks slightly together, the whiskers scraping against her soft skin. "You NEED some rest. Go home, go to sleep."

He walked down the bar and grabbed a shot glass. He poured some Jack Daniels and enjoyed the liquid as it burned down his throat. "I don't even know why I bother with a glass." He gave a raspy laugh and lifted the bottle to his lips.

Rose pulled it away quickly. "Maurice! What the hell is the matter with you?!" She placed the lid on it and stuck it under the bar, out of his reach. He didn't answer and left. He didn't want to end up hitting her too.

~~

He finally made his ay home at around 4:45 that morning; he had nowhere else to go. He had a brown paper bag with a pint of vodka in side. Alcohol seemed to be his only friend at the moment, so he was going to cherish it for as long as he could. It was the only thing that made the demons go away, at least for a little while.

He opened up the glass container and threw the lid as hard as he could against the wall and watched as it rolled slowly, then finally stopping a few inches from his boots. He drank down a fourth of the bottle and sat down on the floor near the couch. He turned the TV on and more news of the plane crash showed across the screen.

He stared at it for a few minutes, not really comprehending what was being said. All he knew was Faith was gone, forever. No more childish bickering, no more "sexual talks" about each other's personal lives, but the thing that bothered him the most was no partnership. No more friendship.

He turned the TV off and took one last drink of vodka before setting the remaining clear liquid on the coffee table. He felt nauseated. He began to gag and before he knew it all the contents of what was in his stomach came up, covering his clothes and the carpet beneath him.

He didn't bother to get up, he just sat back and let sleep overtake him as he laid in his own body fluid.

~~

Davis walked into the roll call room, everyone dim and quiet as they stared back at him. He knew something was up, but what? He found a desk beside Sully and shrugged.

"Most of you have probably heard but I'm going to say it anyway." Swersky paused, keeping his eyes down on some papers before him. "Officer Yokas and her family have died in a place crash. They were on there way to California when it crashed into a Missouri field."

Davis' stomach sank. He had not one clue about it. He hadn't even watched the news or read the paper in so long and now he was regretting it. He also noticed Bosco wasn't present, but who could blame the guy? Partners for ten years and now no longer here. Swersky broke his thoughts.

"Davis, either you or Sully give Boscorelli a call, check on him. Make sure he's okay."

Davis nodded. "Will do sir."

~~

He sat back in his desk chair as he dialed Bosco's home phone and stared at Sully. No one picked up, not even the machine. He hung up the phone and sighed. "No answer."

Sully took a drink of his coffee. "Probably doesn't wanna talk."

"I'm gonna go tell Lieu."

Sully nodded.

~~

"So, get a hold of Bosco yet?" Swersky looked up from a stack of paperwork and waited for Davis to answer.

He shook his head. "No sir, no answer."

Swersky crossed his arms over his chest. "We need to talk to him, let him know about the funeral."

"You want us to go over to his apartment, see if he just as the ringer off?"

Swersky nodded. "Yeah, we need to make sure he is okay anyway."

~~

Sully knocked on the door. "Bosco, it's Davis and I. Open up the door." They waited a few moments and got no response. He knocked again. "Boz, open up, Swersky needs to see you." Not a sound from behind the door.

Davis took a deep breath. "Want me to kick it in?"

"Might as well."

Sully stood back and watched as Ty opened the door up to Bosco's world. The apartment was full of empty bottles of booze scattered everywhere. The heavy scent of alcohol lingered over their heads. Davis walked into the living room, noticing Bosco passed out on the floor.

"Sul, he's over here." Davis pointed.

Sully lightly slapped Bosco's cheek. "Bosco, can you hear me? Boz?" Sully looked up at Davis. "You better call a bus, he looks like he is in bad shape."

~~

Davis and Sully followed Carlos and Doc into the ER, tubes sticking out of Bosco's mouth in order to pump his stomach of all the alcohol that he consumed. This brought back memories for Sully. He had remembered when Tatiana had died, he was the same way. Now people close to him were going through the same thing.

Davis handed him a cup of coffee. "Damn, Bosco looked bad." He blew on the warm liquid, allowing it to cool some before he took a sip.

Sully nodded. "Yeah, he did." He really didn't have much else to say.

Dr. Fields approached him, a clipboard in hand. "We had to pump his stomach. He consumed a huge amount of alcohol, off the chart blood alcohol levels. He was at .21 when he was brought in. He's asleep right now, we are just waiting for him to become conscious and have him throw up."

Sully patted Dr. Fields' arm. "Thanks Doctor." He looked over at Davis as Dr. Fields walked away. ". 21? That is a lot, man."

"He'll be okay?" Davis paced back and forth.

"Yeah, we got him here in time."

~~

Meanwhile Davis and Sully decided to pay a visit to Carlos. He was sitting up in bed, watching a talk show. He gave a small wave as they entered, but he kept his attention up on the TV.

"How ya feeling man?" Davis looked at some magazines on the table beside his bed and then up at the TV.

Carlos shrugged, sending a slight pain down to his chest. "Better I guess. I'm sick of being here though." His voice was soft and light. "Not sure how much longer they'll have me in here. What brings you guys here?"

Sully put his hands in his pockets. "Brought in Bosco for alcohol poisoning awhile ago."

Carlos turned the TV off. "What? What the hell happened?"

Sully's face grew solemn but he decided to tell Carlos since Ty pretty much wasn't comfortable doing it. "Faith took a vacation to California, and on her way there, the plane crashed that her family was in. Bosco obviously took it pretty hard so we went to check on him. He was passed out, a bunch of beer bottles and things around him."

Carlos ran his hand over his forehead. "I saw something about a plane on the TV but I had no idea. Send him my regards."

Ty nodded and shook his hand. "We'll do man. See you later."

~~

Bosco slowly opened his eyes to bright lights above him. He could feel something lodged down his throat and he quickly sat up, gagging as he pulled on the chord. His head felt as if it were going to explode. The nurse approached him, pulling the tube out of his throat and holding up a bedpan for him.

He gagged more and eventually threw up what was left inside him, though it wasn't much. He slammed his head back down onto the pillow and took a deep breath. He was tempted to just rip the I.V. out and leave, but his body wouldn't move. He looked to his side and saw Davis and Sully glaring into the window. He looked away quickly, embarrassed and feeling awkward about the situation.

"Get me outta here."

The nurse applied a cold stethoscope to his chest. "You are still under observation."

He flashed her a confused look. "Observation? I'm fine, it's just a hangover." He sat up, reaching for his I.V. chords but Dr. Fields quickly stopped him.

"Where do you think you are going Officer?"

Bosco closed his eyes and swallowed hard. "I'm going home."

"Not until Swersky comes to talk to you. He's on his way over." Dr. Fields looked over some charts and directed his attention back to Bosco. "I'm going to suggest counseling, possibly AA."

Bosco cut in. "What?! What the fuck for?" He rubbed his bloodshot eyes and closed them again. The bright lights were giving him an even bigger headache.

"Bosco, you had alcohol poisoning, that isn't normal."

Bosco shrugged. "Whatever. I just had a binger, I'm fine now." He looked over at the door as Swersky made his way in, his stomach aching more from the scene of his superior walking towards his bed.

Swersky glanced at Dr. Fields. "Can I see him in private for a few minutes?"

The doctor nodded and walked out.

"Bosco, is everything okay with you? You need to talk to someone."

Bosco sat up as best as he could. "I'm fine Lieu."

He scoffed. "You look fine Bosco. Don't lie to me, it'll put you in deeper shit than your boots can tread. We need to talk about some serious stuff. Faith's funeral for one thing."

Bosco leaned on his arm. "And?"

"I'm not going to have you stand up with the rest of the precinct at it. You are gonna sit down with her parents. You were like family to her so I think that would be best for everyone."

Bosco licked his lips. "I.. I don't know if I can handle going to it."

"Well, you are going to be there. Dress uniform. Get well Bosco, everything will be okay. This too, shall pass."

Bosco ran his fingers over his bed sheet. "When is the funeral?"

"Tomorrow. Two p.m. I can send one over for a ride if you need it."

He shook his head. "No, not necessary."

~~

Bosco left thirty minutes later AMA. He really didn't care that they wanted him to stay; he just needed to get out of there and find somewhere to go. The nearest bar was what he wanted. He looked down at Sully and Davis as he walked past them. He could tell they were talking about him by the way they stared.

He didn't say one word to them as he walked past and out the door, into the cool New York wind.

You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

Eddie Vedder

Here I stand head in hand

Turn my face to the wall

If she's gone I can't go on

Feeling two foot small

Everywhere people stare

Each and every day

I can see them laugh at me

And I hear them say

Hey, you've got to hide your love away

Hey, you've got to hide your love away

How can I even try?

I can never win

Hearing them, seeing them

In the state I'm in

How could she say to me

"Love will find a way?"

Gather round all you clowns

Let me hear you say

Hey, you've got to hide your love away

Hey, you've got to hide your love away