My Immortal

Chibi Arwen

Disclaimer: I don't own GW, and that's that.

Warnings/Notes: This is mostly from Heero's POV. He's reflecting on the death of Duo. This is done to Evanescence's song 'My Immortal'. It just fit the bill for what I was looking for. But anyway, please don't kill me. I like my life, thankyouverymuch.

I REPOSTED! YAY! I fixed all the little grammatical errors, and made the lyrics easier to read and differ from the actual story. /Lyrics/

~*~Story~*~

I looked at the clock for what seemed to be the millionth time. 'Why? Why'd you leave me here, all alone? I need you. It hurt, not being able to do anything, say anything. No one here to comfort me the way he could. Duo.....you knew that going on that mission injured would kill you.

The rest of us had been on our own missions, but he was injured from a previous one, and decided to stay out of the way. But when Sally, I guess, called, he wouldn't wait for us to get back and take it. I didn't find out how far gone he was until I was back. And Sally called, to tell us that Duo was on a mission. We had know he minute that the door to the safe house didn't burst open to allow Duo to come flying out to greet us. He had even left a note for us.

/I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all of my childish fears

And if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave

Because your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone/

Duo, I need you back. I can't take it. Why are all these memories surfacing now? The time before we 'became an item' when you had the bad dream and asked to sleep in my bed with me. When your hands were injured and I had to do everything for you. The smell of your hair, the taste of your lips, the ever-present shine in your eyes. Duo, dammit, why did you have to leave now?

Please come back, Duo.

/These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase/

You were my human safety net. I knew that no matter what happened, Duo was there to stop my fall and make everything okay again. That smile, it lit up my entire day. You were my angel. My guardian. And I tried to protect you, keep you safe from the horrors of the world. But how was I supposed to do that if you go on a suicide mission, without even contacting me first! Duo, you idiot.

/When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me/

Have you ever realized how easy it is to cry, curled up in a fetal position on your bed like this? Bury your under the blankets and sheets, trying to make sense of life. Trying to get over losing the most important thing in the world to you. I'd comfort you when the world beat down on you, I'd love you when others misunderstood, I was alive only because of you. I'd die to save you, Duo. So why did you die for no reason at all?

/You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

But now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me/

It has been a week. All I do is think about you, dream about you, everything I do, or see, or hear..... it all reminds me of you. Quatre tries to make me feel better, even though he knows there's nothing he can do to stop the pain in my heart.

/These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase/

The feel of your hand in mine, the warmth of your body against me, the love in your eyes, your touch, your very soul. I'll never feel any of it again. Never. Duo..... why'd you leave me alone in this world? I'm like a new tightrope walker performing for the first time in front of a crowd without anything to catch me when I fall. Just the thought of you made me able to deal with life, able to get back on track and keep going.

/When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me/

I keep telling myself that you're not coming back, but in my heart, I still wished that one morning I would wake up with you next to me, grinning and sniffing at whatever breakfast Quatre has decided to cook. But I know, even deeper in my heart than that one wish, that you won't. You're gone for good, and though you're probably watching me from the gates heaven, you were never really there to begin with. We were together, we loved each other far too short a time for you to have really been mine, and I to have been yours.

/I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

And though you're still with me I've been alone all along/

Please, Duo. Please come back. I need you now more than ever. I can't take it anymore Duo. I loved and needed you then, I love you and need you more now.

(*!*NOT HEERO'S POV ANYMORE!!!!!*!*)

Thinking he heard someone come into the room he had once shared with his braided love, Heero poked his head out from under the covers of the bed he was curled up in. Looking around, he saw the faintest bit of brown in the corner of his eye. Turning to look at whatever-it-was, Heero gasped and blinked hard.

"Duo?!" he choked out through his tears.

There, at the foot of the bed, was Duo. But he was.....translucent! And he had wings! This was new......

Heero put a hand out to touch the man he loved, and pulled back swiftly when he went straight through the braided American. "Duo, what-"

Duo laughed, his crystalline figure shaking with mirth. "I'm dead, Hee- chan. Remember?"

Heero's eyes slowly began to water as he remembered what had happened, recovering from the brief lack-of-though when he saw Duo.....well, Duo's ghost, anyway. "So then, why are you here?" he asked. A tear slipped down his cheek.

"Because I came to say two or three things to you. One, I love you, Hee- chan. I always have, and I always will."

"Two?" Heero asked, looking into the cloudy eyes of Duo's ghost. It was like looking through a foggy window at night.

"Two," Duo continued, "is that I don't want you telling the others about this. You know them. they'd have you put in the loony bin."

"And then what's three?" Heero asked again, another tear streaking down his cheek as he knew that Duo would be leaving soon.

"Well, three's more of an action than telling you something." Duo leaned forward and down until he was face-to-face with Heero. Gently, he kissed the Japanese boy.

/When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me/

As Duo's chilly, mist-like lips over Heero's, his tears came freely. When they pulled away from the not-quite kiss, Duo smiled sadly at Heero. "I've gotta go, Hee-chan. come on, now, stop crying. I hate it when you cry, especially for me."

"Goodbye, Duo....." Heero whispered as Duo began fading away.

"Good bye, Hee-chan," Duo said, as if from a distance, before fading completely.

~Owari~

Chibi Arwen: *sniffs* Okay, I cried writing this. I hurt me so much to do this, but it was either keep it in my head and suffer, or put it in Word and then put it up on ff.net. So I chose the latter. Now, before I start with my shameless advertisement of other fics.

Chibi Arwen