Drake & Joshis an American Teen sitcom created Dan Schneider by for Nickelodeon. I do not own any of the characters. P.S. This is based after the events of Josh is done the episode personally if I knew I made someone life better by not being a part of it I would probably go out of my way to make sure that I never hurt them again. Personally I would have had a breakdown lol though mine wouldn't be alcohol and women to escape I personalized the breakdown to the character.

DRAKE'S POV

I've always liked you, you just never noticed. I mean I wanted you attention so badly I kept asking you to play ping pong with me even when you kept saying no. But, eventually you gave in and that sweet side of you was too sweet for me to handle. So, of course when cat called and said she wanted to 'Make out' before class I took off. I took off because I kept thinking of you I wanted to run away from you from these feelings. I hurt you I thought you'd just forgive me, but you didn't.

When you kept ignoring me I was forced to see how lost I was without you, and how sorry I was that I was a bad person. I told the entire classroom how much I needed you I guess you wanted me to tell you. I ran away after that cause I realized how deeply I really loved you and everything that you did I want you to kiss me, hold me, and make me yours.

My heart felt broken I'm sorry that I was such a shitty brother to you. Even know when you saw me playing ping pong and you tried to join in those feelings and your niceness destroyed me. I ignored everything that you said and came close I hugged you all the time but this one was different it was deep and emotional. I could tell you were frozen you didn't really know what to do cause you weren't even sure what it meant.

It was a goodbye hug and I couldn't let them destroy the happiness they clearly built up for themselves, "Joshie", I just used his nickname cause it was probably the last time I'll ever be able to call them that. I didn't look them in the eyes I kept my eyes locked on the wall behind me taking in the last of this warmth that I'll probably never feel ever again.

"I'm sorry I ruined your life I promise I won't hurt you again, so let's just keep things the way that they are now", he seemed a little shaken I don't normally share my feelings.

Maybe he thought things were gonna get better they always do I mean we were brothers, but now I'd rather keep you a stranger, "Why? What do you need me to say that I'm sorry too cause, Im sorry there. So, can we please just go back to the way things were?".

Never they can never go back I just love you too much and for me to go through with these feelings when you don't feel the same would hurt us both forever, so it's just better this way. So, I begrudgingly pulled myself away every cell screaming for the warmth that you provided I wanted all of it, but was never going to have it I can't hurt you again, "No".

I didn't give you the chance to speak I just left luckily there were some close in the laundry room that were clean. I left the house that night. Looking for anything to fill this loneliness that I felt.

RING! That stupid fucking telephone I picked it up, but instead I heard what I was looking for something to fill the void a girl. We made plans and I left immediately.

I was at some party now I could feel the base of the music shaking my body as the room swirled slightly from all the alcohol that I consumed that night. Her soft petite hands dragged me through a sea of people everyone parting as she dragged me upstairs. It didn't take long for us to get there we started making out our lips clashing tongues twining all I really wanted was a little warmth and pleasure. I could see visions of joshes face in hers each kiss starting to feel better and better till I wasn't looking at her anymore it wasn't even her that I was doing it with and my heart felt so broken. But, I kept going even further until our bodies became sweaty messes with me on top of her thrusting until until we were both spent and then I just lied there staring at the ceiling. She made an attempt to communicate with me but even though I heard her I couldn't understand what she was saying. I could see her getting frustrated she gathered up her clothes and left slamming the door behind her. I was finally alone and man was I cold, but instead I just stayed there not moving not thinking just staring at the ceiling.