A/N: I'm really glad everyone's liking my story so far. It's pretty much
almost over (one, maybe two more chapters) so keep reading and reviewing!
Heero Yuy was a patient man. He could wait without complaint for plans to come together for days. You had to be a patient soldier. Brash never won any wars (at least that's what they said in training). He could barely remember himself pre-training. Now he had a slight idea as to who he had been.
For the past three hours Heero Yuy had stood next to Relena listening to the most stupid and obscure ramblings ever. At one point he'd been ready to kill every person in the conference hall, save Relena. There were itchy bugs under his skin that he longed to scratch at.or at least jump around with.
Which was why he was outside eyeing the pristine buildings lobby where Relena was instead of right next to her. She was "finishing things up" with the committee members. Another second of that yammer would drive Heero insane.
Relena was happy at least. Her obstetrician had called that morning to say that she had passed into the last two months of her pregnancy. "Only two more months," she had cried gleefully, not knowing Heero had been behind her. Was he really that bad?
"Goodbye!" Heero heard Relena call out. Despite the fact that she was now eight months pregnant Relena still walked with an almost casual elegance. Relena smiled as Heero opened the jet-black limousines door. "Thank God that's over!"
Heero nodded in silent agreement as he helped Relena into the limo. "Pargan, take us to the circus please," Relena ordered.
"I hope things went well with Trowa and Quatre," Relena commented.
Heero nodded.
This was generally how most of their conversations went. Relena did most of the talking and Heero exercised his neck. It wasn't that he didn't pay attention; he didn't really have anything to say.
"Ooh, it's so pretty out," Relena purred. Heero nodded yet again. The colony was decked out for the holidays. Christmas decorations adorned even the most stoic of buildings.
"They'll make it snow tonight," Heero finally said, gesturing to the looming "clouds."
"That'll be so nice."
Heero nodded just as Pargan announced that they had reached the circus. Heero helped Relena out of the car and they headed towards the circus.
The outside of the tent wasn't decorated, but inside several strands of Christmas lights had been put up. Heero spotted Trowa near the lion cage stowed in the shadows of the tent. "Trowa!" he called.
As soon as Trowa made his way over Relena knew something was wrong. "How did it go Trowa?" she asked.
"Bad," he said simply. "He hasn't quite healed yet. I think we should give him more time."
Heero sighed. "We should have given him more time from the start. What exactly did he do?"
Trowa's eyes flashed as he remembered the gun Quatre had pointed at him. "Nothing really," he said stiffly. Heero took his word, but Relena had seen the glimmer in Trowa's eyes. Sensing that there was more to this than Trowa was letting on she glanced at Heero. Trowa wouldn't say a thing in front of Heero, but maybe if it was just her and him Relena could get Trowa to talk.
"Heero," Relena said.
Heero knew that tone. He straightened himself and prepared for an order.
"I'm hungry."
"What do you want?"
"I don't care. And get something for yourself okay? I'll stay with Trowa."
"But-"
"A mad gunman is not going to barge into the circus the moment you leave. And if he does Trowa's here."
Trowa nodded in agreement when Heero threw his stare at him. "Fine. I'll be back in five minutes. Tops," Heero said as he turned to leave.
"Heero dear," Relena called before he got too far away.
"What?" he asked.
"Don't assault anyone with plastic forks and knives like last time okay?"
Heero flushed as he nodded and left.
"Something's wrong," Relena said as she turned to face Trowa. He looked slightly taken aback at the declaration and Relena smiled. "Trowa, I'm pregnant so I'm feeling very sensitive to mood changes right now. That and I do have women's intuition."
Trowa let out a small, almost inaudible sigh. "He told me he hated me."
"Trowa he didn't mean that."
"I know, I know. I know he's really messed up right now. I'm not blind. But there were other things."
"Tell me Trowa."
Trowa looked at Relena evaluating her. He took a deep breath and spewed out what had happened at Quatre's. "He told me never to come back. He told me not to have anyone else come to check on him. He called us all 'fucks.' He-he-drew a gun at me Relena!"
Relena opened her eyes in surprise at the last thing Trowa said. "No," she whispered.
"Why does that hurt so much? He wanted to kill me. Why does that bother me so much? It shouldn't. He wasn't in his right state of mind. But it was him and-God I don't know what I'm saying."
Relena raised an eyebrow at what Trowa said. Why did it hurt so much? He didn't know. Damn. Everyone but the two involved knew Trowa was in love with Quatre. Relena knew she had to address that and she saw no point in betting around the bush, especially considering Heero would be back potentially any second.
"You know Trowa, it's possible you love him."
It was Trowa's turn to raise an eyebrow. "He's my friend," Trowa said as though that cleared everything up.
"No, I mean like I love Heero."
Trowa's eyes widened as everything clicked into place. For one brief second every mystery in the universe cleared up as Trowa came to the conclusion he'd been denying himself for so long. "I love him," he whispered.
Relena nodded happily. She put her hand on Trowa's shoulder. "He's going to be fine. Have a little patience. We need to give him his space. He'll come around."
At that point this was all Trowa needed to hear and more. He put his faith in Relena's words. Relena smiled brightly and let her hand drop from Trowa's shoulder. She turned towards the front of the circus tent just as Heero entered. "Right on time," Relena said.
Heero strode calmly towards the pair, a bag of food in his hand. Trowa could tell he'd been running. Heero looked at his watch. "Almost four minutes," he said. "I'm getting old."
"Blame me. If you'd assaulted somebody like last time you'd have been here in half the time," Relena said, smiling.
"Hn," Heero stated blankly and handed the bag of food over to Relena. "We'll see you around Trowa! Take care of yourself!" Relena called as she and Heero left.
Trowa sighed as he watched them disappear from sight. He knew Quatre didn't mean the things he said, but it still stung. 'Because I love him.' The thought brought a blush to his face. 'When Quatre gets better I'll tell him,' he thought. 'I don't know how but I'll tell him. I'll tell him I love him.'
Before Quatre had found out about his mother he had loved Trowa as well. Loved him deeply. But he had never told Trowa for fear of being rejected.
Now Quatre was not in the mood to love anybody. Now he sat in his bed staring into space.
His servants had learned already what the new Quatre required. You left his meal at the front of his door, knocked politely and ran away before he could come out. Sometimes he would eat his meal and you'd take the spoils. Other times the plate would be untouched and you'd think about all those poor kids in Neo-Ethiopia.
Quatre only did things necessary for maintaining homeostasis. On occasion he showered. He lived in the dark space between reality and dreams. He barely slept because when he did he'd see that face. His mothers face. He refused to face the problem, opting instead to delve into the comforting dark space that was beyond feeling.
He lived like this for three weeks and did not notice how the time flew. His friends did of course.
Every night Trowa would prey for the sound of a phone. Prey that Quatre would be on the other line. He didn't need an apology then. Just his voice.
The others were not taking it as badly as Trowa was, but they all missed Quatre. He was the one who usually arranged for them together and without him it was hard to coordinate things. Quatre remembered everyone's schedule. Without him they lacked knowledge of each other's personal lives.
They hadn't really seen each other since the fateful day Quatre found out. Only Relena pursued having them get together, but it was hard for her as well. She was at, her opinion, the worst stage of her pregnancy and sometimes getting out of bed was a chore, let alone calling her friends.
On a freezing day in late December, just a few days before Christmas, Relena got a feeling. The same feeling she'd had during the war when she knew she had to find Heero. She woke that day with her feeling. The feeling to go see Quatre. It had been long enough.
At first Heero refused her. "You're too far along," he said. "I want you to stay here."
"Something's going to happen if we don't get there today. He'll do something soon. Something to himself. It's bad enough we left him this long alone already."
Heero narrowed his eyes at her, but he knew she could not be dissuaded. Despite his better judgment he had Pargan drive her to the Winner mansion. He went too of course.
Quatre's servants were pleased to see some of his friends. Maybe they'd get their old master back. Relena allowed Heero to accompany her all the way up to Quatres door but then she stopped him. "I'm going in there alone."
"Relena-"
"Don't start. I'll leave the door cracked should a deranged assassin manage to get through the window. I need to speak to Quatre alone Heero."
He really hated when she did that to him. He wanted to always stand by her side, to protect her. But he knew she needed to go in alone. He consented to being the sentry with a 'hn' and she went inside.
Relena walked in cautiously. She had purposely not told Heero that Quatre had a gun or she would have never been able to come in here alone. And she knew it had to be just her and Quatre.
When she saw him on the bed she almost cried. He was the shell of the man she once knew. He was skinny, his face had an unnatural color to it and his eyes were blank and devoid of anything.
"Quatre?" she asked gently.
Quatre was about to snap at her when he noticed who she was. "Relena?" the sane remnants of his mind forced the question up.
"Yes Quatre. It's me," Relena smiled, glad that he hadn't shown any aggression yet.
Then he registered her 'delicate condition' and a long stream of thoughts ran through his head. They went through his mind like a chain, linking him back to his misery. They went something like this: pregnant-me-pregnant- mother-tubes-pregnant-mother-my fault-pregnant. He shook his head free of the thoughts and became angry at Relena.
"Get out," he hissed.
She sighed. She knew it would come to this. "Quatre, I know you're upset about your mother. Don't you want to talk about it?"
"No! Get out! I don't want to talk about that. Get out!"
"Quatre, we really need to talk about it."
"No! Didn't you hear me? I said get out! I'm tired of dealing with you brainless idiots! Get-"
In one swift movement Relena had moved to Quatre and gave him a hard smack across the face. He looked shocked as hell. Relena dropped all pretense of gentleness. "Get a grip Quatre! Get a goddamn grip! Do you know what you've become? You've lost yourself Quatre! You've lost everything that used to be important to you! You refuse to see your friends and you threw out and hurt someone who cares about you a lot!"
"Trowa." Quatre whispered, still looking stunned.
"Quatre, I know this is hard for you but stop acting like a spoiled brat. It's tough but you need to get a grip on reality! Get out of yourself! We miss you and we want to help you!"
Quatre looked up, dumfounded at Relena. He had been rudely awakened back to reality and that horrible scene with Trowa replayed itself in his mind. Had that really been him? "Oh God what's wrong with me?" Quatre asked. "What have I turned into?"
Quatre locked eyes with Relena and sucked in a sharp breath as he remembered everything bad from his life. From when he acted like an idiot in his childhood, to finding out about his mother and ending at the incident with Trowa. Quatre felt all the bad emotions gather up inside of him and position at his eyes. Through the bleariness of a million tears Quatre could still see Relena. And then he saw his father smiling at him, talking about the beauty of the earth. Then all the memorable moments with the Magnacs. Happy pictures buzzed around Quatres brain, reminding him of all the things he lived for. The best pictures were ones with Trowa. They seemed to glow and shimmer in Quatres mind.
With the collision of happy and sad Quatre saw how much of an idiot he'd been. Rejecting his friends and happiness just so he could wallow in his misery. Just because he felt he deserved it. How fucking selfish could he be?
Throughout it all Relena stayed with Quatre, patient. Finally, Quatre choked out a sob and threw himself into Relenas arms, crying as hard as he could. Relena put her arms around Quatre and hugged him close to her. She slowly rocked him back and forth, comforting him.
They stayed like that until Quatre had exhausted all of his tears, and even then Relena rocked him until his breathing patterns returned to normal. Eventually Quatre released himself from Relenas hold and gave her a weak smile. "Thanks Relena," he sniffled.
Relena smiled and made a gesture as to say 'think nothing of it.' "I can't believe you came all the way out here to save me when you're so far along," he said.
Relena laughed. "Oh please Quatre, I heard enough of that from Heero."
Quatre smiled. "Speaking of which, where is he?"
"Probably eavesdropping as we speak."
On the other side of the door Heero stiffened. After a moments hesitation he poked his head through the door and gave Relena an angry stare. This only made Relena and Quatre laugh.
"Oh Heero I mean nothing by it!" Relena said, in between fits of laughter.
Heero grumbled to himself as he brought himself into full view. He eyed Quatre, assessing him quickly. "Well, Heero I suppose you want to go then," Relena said, bringing herself to her feet before Heero could rush over.
Heero said nothing, but offered an acknowledging nod to Quatre. Relena turned to Quatre and gave him an awkward hug. It had been easier to hold him when she was sitting down. Blushing slightly she asked, "Quatre can I use your bathroom please?"
"Of course," Quatre gestured to the bathroom, hoping it wasn't a terrible mess. Relena walked over to the bathroom giving Heero a quick look as if to say 'I do not need help with this.'
Heero turned his attention to Quatre and asked, "Do you think I hover over her too much?"
"Well, just a little bit. But you're just doing what feels right to you.right?"
"Exactly," Heero said, nodding fervently. "And I'm trying to-"
"Heero," Relena interrupted.
"Yes?" he asked.
"Call the hospital and tell them we'll be there in ten minutes."
The information didn't quite register with Heero, so as he made his way, calmly, to Quatre's phone he asked, "Why are we going?"
"Well, Heero remember when the doctor explained how we'd know when the baby was coming?"
"Oh the water-" Heero stopped mid-sentence, mid-way to the phone and turned to face Relena. His eyes widened with shock. "Having-baby?" He managed to get out.
Quatre stifled a chuckle. It was strange to see Heero act this way. "Yes, Heero. The baby is coming."
Heero remained stationary, just sort of staring at Relena. Relena, in turn, sighed and asked Quatre if he would call the hospital. "The 42nd street one?" he confirmed.
As soon as Quatre got off the phone, Heero regained himself. "Let's go," he offered his hand to Relena, who gladly took it, knowing that within a few hours he'd stop this foolishness. That and she sub-consciously planned to crush his fingers when the contractions came.
By the time they got to the hospital, Heero had to switch hands because his fingers were throbbing pretty badly. Quatre had accompanied them to the hospital on Relena's request. He wouldn't be going into the delivery room, but he had orders to call Zechs and Noin after an hour to tell them what was going on.
Quatre reached Zechs on his cell phone. The reception was terrible. "Zechs! It's Quatre!"
"Catherine? But she's right in front of me." Catherine? Oh they must be at the circus. At the circus with Trowa. Quatre's heart beat a little faster. "No! Quatre! Quatre Raberba Winner!"
There was a long crackly pause. "Quatre?" Quatre could hear a few shocked responses on the other side. "Yeah Zechs, listen Relena just went into labor."
"Relena's your neighbor?"
"Relena. Went. Into. Labor," Quatre enunciated clearly.
"Labor? Labor!"
"Yeah, at the 42nd street hospital."
"We'll be right over!"
Quatre hung up the hospital payphone and went back to Relena's room. When he had left the doors were open, now they were closed. Surely she couldn't be that far along. Didn't labor take hours upon hours? Nothing could be wrong could it? She had seemed fine when she went in didn't she? Why was he feeling so weird?
No, not weird. Normal. He felt normal. He was happy. He wasn't wallowing in misery. He shook his head at the pathetic thought of himself in that bed for all this time. Perhaps he should go to a therapist to talk about the issues he had about his mother? Yes, that's exactly what he'd do. That's what he should have done in the first place.
"Quatre!" Quatre turned his head to see Zechs, Noin, Trowa, Catherine, Duo and Hilde heading towards him. "Where's Relena?" Zechs asked.
"She's in there," Quatre gestured to the door behind him. "I don't know if they'll let you in. You'll need to ask a doctor." No sooner were the words out of Quatre's mouth that Zechs zeroed in on a doctor and started asking him fast questions.
"I'm sorry," the doctor said. "They're only allowing the father in that particular room right now."
Zechs looked close to murder until Noin dragged him away from the doctor, whispering in his ear not to make a scene. "He's in there right?" Zechs asked Quatre sharply.
"Who Heero? Yeah, he's in there."
"Good," Zechs nodded, glad at least that Heero was with his little sister. Then he remembered that it was Heero who had gotten Relena pregnant and in pain in the first place. Noin seemed to follow Zechs' train of thought so she suggested that her and Zechs take a walk to the food court to get something for everyone. They were defiantly going to be there for a while.
"You better get some for Sally and WuFei too. I called them on the way over," Hilde said.
"Okay, so that's nine meals. I'm not going to be able to carry all that and I really don't trust Zechs when he's like this," said Noin gesturing to Zechs who was staring violently at Relena's door. "I'll come too," Catherine said, standing up. Trowa stood up silently after her signaling that he would come as well.
"Okay," Noin said and she dragged Zechs down the hall with them to find the cafeteria.
"Well, I never thought this would happen today," Duo said smiling at Quatre. Then his expression grew serious. "So, you're okay now?"
"For the time being," Quatre said. Then he took a breath. "I'm going to see a therapist."
"I have a friend who is a therapist. She's really good. Do you want me to set up an appointment for you?" Hilde asked.
Quatre smiled. It felt good to smile. "Thank you Hilde. I really appreciate that."
A tiny yawn made Quatre blink in surprise when he noticed that Duo and Hilde had brought along their one year old daughter, Brooke. She was nestled in Hilde's arms. She had Duo's trademark brown hair. It was already long, by one-year-old standards at least. How much more time until her hair was longer than her fathers?
Duo caught Quatre staring. "Quatre-"
"It's weird isn't it? How life goes on?"
"Are you sure you're okay Quatre?"
"Yeah Duo, I'm okay."
Duo gave Quatre a big smile just as Sally and WuFei came rushing down the hall.
"So," Sally said. "What did we miss?"
~*~
Sorry this took so goddamn long to get out. It was a little hard to write. Tell me what you think.
Heero Yuy was a patient man. He could wait without complaint for plans to come together for days. You had to be a patient soldier. Brash never won any wars (at least that's what they said in training). He could barely remember himself pre-training. Now he had a slight idea as to who he had been.
For the past three hours Heero Yuy had stood next to Relena listening to the most stupid and obscure ramblings ever. At one point he'd been ready to kill every person in the conference hall, save Relena. There were itchy bugs under his skin that he longed to scratch at.or at least jump around with.
Which was why he was outside eyeing the pristine buildings lobby where Relena was instead of right next to her. She was "finishing things up" with the committee members. Another second of that yammer would drive Heero insane.
Relena was happy at least. Her obstetrician had called that morning to say that she had passed into the last two months of her pregnancy. "Only two more months," she had cried gleefully, not knowing Heero had been behind her. Was he really that bad?
"Goodbye!" Heero heard Relena call out. Despite the fact that she was now eight months pregnant Relena still walked with an almost casual elegance. Relena smiled as Heero opened the jet-black limousines door. "Thank God that's over!"
Heero nodded in silent agreement as he helped Relena into the limo. "Pargan, take us to the circus please," Relena ordered.
"I hope things went well with Trowa and Quatre," Relena commented.
Heero nodded.
This was generally how most of their conversations went. Relena did most of the talking and Heero exercised his neck. It wasn't that he didn't pay attention; he didn't really have anything to say.
"Ooh, it's so pretty out," Relena purred. Heero nodded yet again. The colony was decked out for the holidays. Christmas decorations adorned even the most stoic of buildings.
"They'll make it snow tonight," Heero finally said, gesturing to the looming "clouds."
"That'll be so nice."
Heero nodded just as Pargan announced that they had reached the circus. Heero helped Relena out of the car and they headed towards the circus.
The outside of the tent wasn't decorated, but inside several strands of Christmas lights had been put up. Heero spotted Trowa near the lion cage stowed in the shadows of the tent. "Trowa!" he called.
As soon as Trowa made his way over Relena knew something was wrong. "How did it go Trowa?" she asked.
"Bad," he said simply. "He hasn't quite healed yet. I think we should give him more time."
Heero sighed. "We should have given him more time from the start. What exactly did he do?"
Trowa's eyes flashed as he remembered the gun Quatre had pointed at him. "Nothing really," he said stiffly. Heero took his word, but Relena had seen the glimmer in Trowa's eyes. Sensing that there was more to this than Trowa was letting on she glanced at Heero. Trowa wouldn't say a thing in front of Heero, but maybe if it was just her and him Relena could get Trowa to talk.
"Heero," Relena said.
Heero knew that tone. He straightened himself and prepared for an order.
"I'm hungry."
"What do you want?"
"I don't care. And get something for yourself okay? I'll stay with Trowa."
"But-"
"A mad gunman is not going to barge into the circus the moment you leave. And if he does Trowa's here."
Trowa nodded in agreement when Heero threw his stare at him. "Fine. I'll be back in five minutes. Tops," Heero said as he turned to leave.
"Heero dear," Relena called before he got too far away.
"What?" he asked.
"Don't assault anyone with plastic forks and knives like last time okay?"
Heero flushed as he nodded and left.
"Something's wrong," Relena said as she turned to face Trowa. He looked slightly taken aback at the declaration and Relena smiled. "Trowa, I'm pregnant so I'm feeling very sensitive to mood changes right now. That and I do have women's intuition."
Trowa let out a small, almost inaudible sigh. "He told me he hated me."
"Trowa he didn't mean that."
"I know, I know. I know he's really messed up right now. I'm not blind. But there were other things."
"Tell me Trowa."
Trowa looked at Relena evaluating her. He took a deep breath and spewed out what had happened at Quatre's. "He told me never to come back. He told me not to have anyone else come to check on him. He called us all 'fucks.' He-he-drew a gun at me Relena!"
Relena opened her eyes in surprise at the last thing Trowa said. "No," she whispered.
"Why does that hurt so much? He wanted to kill me. Why does that bother me so much? It shouldn't. He wasn't in his right state of mind. But it was him and-God I don't know what I'm saying."
Relena raised an eyebrow at what Trowa said. Why did it hurt so much? He didn't know. Damn. Everyone but the two involved knew Trowa was in love with Quatre. Relena knew she had to address that and she saw no point in betting around the bush, especially considering Heero would be back potentially any second.
"You know Trowa, it's possible you love him."
It was Trowa's turn to raise an eyebrow. "He's my friend," Trowa said as though that cleared everything up.
"No, I mean like I love Heero."
Trowa's eyes widened as everything clicked into place. For one brief second every mystery in the universe cleared up as Trowa came to the conclusion he'd been denying himself for so long. "I love him," he whispered.
Relena nodded happily. She put her hand on Trowa's shoulder. "He's going to be fine. Have a little patience. We need to give him his space. He'll come around."
At that point this was all Trowa needed to hear and more. He put his faith in Relena's words. Relena smiled brightly and let her hand drop from Trowa's shoulder. She turned towards the front of the circus tent just as Heero entered. "Right on time," Relena said.
Heero strode calmly towards the pair, a bag of food in his hand. Trowa could tell he'd been running. Heero looked at his watch. "Almost four minutes," he said. "I'm getting old."
"Blame me. If you'd assaulted somebody like last time you'd have been here in half the time," Relena said, smiling.
"Hn," Heero stated blankly and handed the bag of food over to Relena. "We'll see you around Trowa! Take care of yourself!" Relena called as she and Heero left.
Trowa sighed as he watched them disappear from sight. He knew Quatre didn't mean the things he said, but it still stung. 'Because I love him.' The thought brought a blush to his face. 'When Quatre gets better I'll tell him,' he thought. 'I don't know how but I'll tell him. I'll tell him I love him.'
Before Quatre had found out about his mother he had loved Trowa as well. Loved him deeply. But he had never told Trowa for fear of being rejected.
Now Quatre was not in the mood to love anybody. Now he sat in his bed staring into space.
His servants had learned already what the new Quatre required. You left his meal at the front of his door, knocked politely and ran away before he could come out. Sometimes he would eat his meal and you'd take the spoils. Other times the plate would be untouched and you'd think about all those poor kids in Neo-Ethiopia.
Quatre only did things necessary for maintaining homeostasis. On occasion he showered. He lived in the dark space between reality and dreams. He barely slept because when he did he'd see that face. His mothers face. He refused to face the problem, opting instead to delve into the comforting dark space that was beyond feeling.
He lived like this for three weeks and did not notice how the time flew. His friends did of course.
Every night Trowa would prey for the sound of a phone. Prey that Quatre would be on the other line. He didn't need an apology then. Just his voice.
The others were not taking it as badly as Trowa was, but they all missed Quatre. He was the one who usually arranged for them together and without him it was hard to coordinate things. Quatre remembered everyone's schedule. Without him they lacked knowledge of each other's personal lives.
They hadn't really seen each other since the fateful day Quatre found out. Only Relena pursued having them get together, but it was hard for her as well. She was at, her opinion, the worst stage of her pregnancy and sometimes getting out of bed was a chore, let alone calling her friends.
On a freezing day in late December, just a few days before Christmas, Relena got a feeling. The same feeling she'd had during the war when she knew she had to find Heero. She woke that day with her feeling. The feeling to go see Quatre. It had been long enough.
At first Heero refused her. "You're too far along," he said. "I want you to stay here."
"Something's going to happen if we don't get there today. He'll do something soon. Something to himself. It's bad enough we left him this long alone already."
Heero narrowed his eyes at her, but he knew she could not be dissuaded. Despite his better judgment he had Pargan drive her to the Winner mansion. He went too of course.
Quatre's servants were pleased to see some of his friends. Maybe they'd get their old master back. Relena allowed Heero to accompany her all the way up to Quatres door but then she stopped him. "I'm going in there alone."
"Relena-"
"Don't start. I'll leave the door cracked should a deranged assassin manage to get through the window. I need to speak to Quatre alone Heero."
He really hated when she did that to him. He wanted to always stand by her side, to protect her. But he knew she needed to go in alone. He consented to being the sentry with a 'hn' and she went inside.
Relena walked in cautiously. She had purposely not told Heero that Quatre had a gun or she would have never been able to come in here alone. And she knew it had to be just her and Quatre.
When she saw him on the bed she almost cried. He was the shell of the man she once knew. He was skinny, his face had an unnatural color to it and his eyes were blank and devoid of anything.
"Quatre?" she asked gently.
Quatre was about to snap at her when he noticed who she was. "Relena?" the sane remnants of his mind forced the question up.
"Yes Quatre. It's me," Relena smiled, glad that he hadn't shown any aggression yet.
Then he registered her 'delicate condition' and a long stream of thoughts ran through his head. They went through his mind like a chain, linking him back to his misery. They went something like this: pregnant-me-pregnant- mother-tubes-pregnant-mother-my fault-pregnant. He shook his head free of the thoughts and became angry at Relena.
"Get out," he hissed.
She sighed. She knew it would come to this. "Quatre, I know you're upset about your mother. Don't you want to talk about it?"
"No! Get out! I don't want to talk about that. Get out!"
"Quatre, we really need to talk about it."
"No! Didn't you hear me? I said get out! I'm tired of dealing with you brainless idiots! Get-"
In one swift movement Relena had moved to Quatre and gave him a hard smack across the face. He looked shocked as hell. Relena dropped all pretense of gentleness. "Get a grip Quatre! Get a goddamn grip! Do you know what you've become? You've lost yourself Quatre! You've lost everything that used to be important to you! You refuse to see your friends and you threw out and hurt someone who cares about you a lot!"
"Trowa." Quatre whispered, still looking stunned.
"Quatre, I know this is hard for you but stop acting like a spoiled brat. It's tough but you need to get a grip on reality! Get out of yourself! We miss you and we want to help you!"
Quatre looked up, dumfounded at Relena. He had been rudely awakened back to reality and that horrible scene with Trowa replayed itself in his mind. Had that really been him? "Oh God what's wrong with me?" Quatre asked. "What have I turned into?"
Quatre locked eyes with Relena and sucked in a sharp breath as he remembered everything bad from his life. From when he acted like an idiot in his childhood, to finding out about his mother and ending at the incident with Trowa. Quatre felt all the bad emotions gather up inside of him and position at his eyes. Through the bleariness of a million tears Quatre could still see Relena. And then he saw his father smiling at him, talking about the beauty of the earth. Then all the memorable moments with the Magnacs. Happy pictures buzzed around Quatres brain, reminding him of all the things he lived for. The best pictures were ones with Trowa. They seemed to glow and shimmer in Quatres mind.
With the collision of happy and sad Quatre saw how much of an idiot he'd been. Rejecting his friends and happiness just so he could wallow in his misery. Just because he felt he deserved it. How fucking selfish could he be?
Throughout it all Relena stayed with Quatre, patient. Finally, Quatre choked out a sob and threw himself into Relenas arms, crying as hard as he could. Relena put her arms around Quatre and hugged him close to her. She slowly rocked him back and forth, comforting him.
They stayed like that until Quatre had exhausted all of his tears, and even then Relena rocked him until his breathing patterns returned to normal. Eventually Quatre released himself from Relenas hold and gave her a weak smile. "Thanks Relena," he sniffled.
Relena smiled and made a gesture as to say 'think nothing of it.' "I can't believe you came all the way out here to save me when you're so far along," he said.
Relena laughed. "Oh please Quatre, I heard enough of that from Heero."
Quatre smiled. "Speaking of which, where is he?"
"Probably eavesdropping as we speak."
On the other side of the door Heero stiffened. After a moments hesitation he poked his head through the door and gave Relena an angry stare. This only made Relena and Quatre laugh.
"Oh Heero I mean nothing by it!" Relena said, in between fits of laughter.
Heero grumbled to himself as he brought himself into full view. He eyed Quatre, assessing him quickly. "Well, Heero I suppose you want to go then," Relena said, bringing herself to her feet before Heero could rush over.
Heero said nothing, but offered an acknowledging nod to Quatre. Relena turned to Quatre and gave him an awkward hug. It had been easier to hold him when she was sitting down. Blushing slightly she asked, "Quatre can I use your bathroom please?"
"Of course," Quatre gestured to the bathroom, hoping it wasn't a terrible mess. Relena walked over to the bathroom giving Heero a quick look as if to say 'I do not need help with this.'
Heero turned his attention to Quatre and asked, "Do you think I hover over her too much?"
"Well, just a little bit. But you're just doing what feels right to you.right?"
"Exactly," Heero said, nodding fervently. "And I'm trying to-"
"Heero," Relena interrupted.
"Yes?" he asked.
"Call the hospital and tell them we'll be there in ten minutes."
The information didn't quite register with Heero, so as he made his way, calmly, to Quatre's phone he asked, "Why are we going?"
"Well, Heero remember when the doctor explained how we'd know when the baby was coming?"
"Oh the water-" Heero stopped mid-sentence, mid-way to the phone and turned to face Relena. His eyes widened with shock. "Having-baby?" He managed to get out.
Quatre stifled a chuckle. It was strange to see Heero act this way. "Yes, Heero. The baby is coming."
Heero remained stationary, just sort of staring at Relena. Relena, in turn, sighed and asked Quatre if he would call the hospital. "The 42nd street one?" he confirmed.
As soon as Quatre got off the phone, Heero regained himself. "Let's go," he offered his hand to Relena, who gladly took it, knowing that within a few hours he'd stop this foolishness. That and she sub-consciously planned to crush his fingers when the contractions came.
By the time they got to the hospital, Heero had to switch hands because his fingers were throbbing pretty badly. Quatre had accompanied them to the hospital on Relena's request. He wouldn't be going into the delivery room, but he had orders to call Zechs and Noin after an hour to tell them what was going on.
Quatre reached Zechs on his cell phone. The reception was terrible. "Zechs! It's Quatre!"
"Catherine? But she's right in front of me." Catherine? Oh they must be at the circus. At the circus with Trowa. Quatre's heart beat a little faster. "No! Quatre! Quatre Raberba Winner!"
There was a long crackly pause. "Quatre?" Quatre could hear a few shocked responses on the other side. "Yeah Zechs, listen Relena just went into labor."
"Relena's your neighbor?"
"Relena. Went. Into. Labor," Quatre enunciated clearly.
"Labor? Labor!"
"Yeah, at the 42nd street hospital."
"We'll be right over!"
Quatre hung up the hospital payphone and went back to Relena's room. When he had left the doors were open, now they were closed. Surely she couldn't be that far along. Didn't labor take hours upon hours? Nothing could be wrong could it? She had seemed fine when she went in didn't she? Why was he feeling so weird?
No, not weird. Normal. He felt normal. He was happy. He wasn't wallowing in misery. He shook his head at the pathetic thought of himself in that bed for all this time. Perhaps he should go to a therapist to talk about the issues he had about his mother? Yes, that's exactly what he'd do. That's what he should have done in the first place.
"Quatre!" Quatre turned his head to see Zechs, Noin, Trowa, Catherine, Duo and Hilde heading towards him. "Where's Relena?" Zechs asked.
"She's in there," Quatre gestured to the door behind him. "I don't know if they'll let you in. You'll need to ask a doctor." No sooner were the words out of Quatre's mouth that Zechs zeroed in on a doctor and started asking him fast questions.
"I'm sorry," the doctor said. "They're only allowing the father in that particular room right now."
Zechs looked close to murder until Noin dragged him away from the doctor, whispering in his ear not to make a scene. "He's in there right?" Zechs asked Quatre sharply.
"Who Heero? Yeah, he's in there."
"Good," Zechs nodded, glad at least that Heero was with his little sister. Then he remembered that it was Heero who had gotten Relena pregnant and in pain in the first place. Noin seemed to follow Zechs' train of thought so she suggested that her and Zechs take a walk to the food court to get something for everyone. They were defiantly going to be there for a while.
"You better get some for Sally and WuFei too. I called them on the way over," Hilde said.
"Okay, so that's nine meals. I'm not going to be able to carry all that and I really don't trust Zechs when he's like this," said Noin gesturing to Zechs who was staring violently at Relena's door. "I'll come too," Catherine said, standing up. Trowa stood up silently after her signaling that he would come as well.
"Okay," Noin said and she dragged Zechs down the hall with them to find the cafeteria.
"Well, I never thought this would happen today," Duo said smiling at Quatre. Then his expression grew serious. "So, you're okay now?"
"For the time being," Quatre said. Then he took a breath. "I'm going to see a therapist."
"I have a friend who is a therapist. She's really good. Do you want me to set up an appointment for you?" Hilde asked.
Quatre smiled. It felt good to smile. "Thank you Hilde. I really appreciate that."
A tiny yawn made Quatre blink in surprise when he noticed that Duo and Hilde had brought along their one year old daughter, Brooke. She was nestled in Hilde's arms. She had Duo's trademark brown hair. It was already long, by one-year-old standards at least. How much more time until her hair was longer than her fathers?
Duo caught Quatre staring. "Quatre-"
"It's weird isn't it? How life goes on?"
"Are you sure you're okay Quatre?"
"Yeah Duo, I'm okay."
Duo gave Quatre a big smile just as Sally and WuFei came rushing down the hall.
"So," Sally said. "What did we miss?"
~*~
Sorry this took so goddamn long to get out. It was a little hard to write. Tell me what you think.
