Thank you for your reviews and I apologize that this chapter is a month late. This has nothing to do with me being lazy. (Lazy, me? Oh no, of course not! *innocent smile*) In fact, I was out of town for a month on vacation and unfortunately, there was no way I could go online at my holiday place. Not to mention my files are saved in my laptop and I had to leave it behind. =_=;
But as a compensation, I'll try and have a couple of future chapters out early. I hope to see lots of reviews for this chapter then!! :p And as for those of you waiting for the second chapter of "The Missing Soldier", I hope you can be patient. I've got it written and it just needs editing, hopefully it will be up soon.
Immortality
Chapter 3: Sayonara, my innocence
By: Lady of Earth
Edited by: Cher Chan
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters in this fic or the song
"Immortality". Characters from SM belong to Naoko Takeuchi and
characters from DBZ belong to Akira Toriyama.
And I will stand for my dream if I can
Symbol of my faith in who I am
There was no sign of the dark forces at all and it puzzled her
greatly. After all, why was she sent to this dimension when there is no trace of
evil forces anywhere?
She sighed in frustration as she sat down on her couch. Gohan was suppose to
come and study with her tonight. She smiled slightly at the thought of him,
but then shook the thought out of her head. 'Kami-sama, what am I thinking? I
can't act like this! The fate of this world...his world is in my hands.'
She paused.
'I don't even know why he's helping me. I'm the one given the duty to destroy
his planet?' She grabbed a pillow and hugged it tightly. 'How can I think if my
head is jumbled up?' A faint blush was creeping up her cheek. Letting out
another sigh, she finally got up.
She was growing restless with her constant thought of Gohan.
The day before, they had gone to Venus and she had told him a little about
her old friend, the senshi of love. But in midst of explaining one of Venus' old
match making schemes, she was growing red on the face. He hadn't noticed it for
some reason. But at the times in which he wasn't looking, she gave him a
look-over. He was attractive. There was no denying it. Endymion was all right
when it came to looks, but Gohan was different. He had
the charm, the strength and kindness as well as the looks. Everything any girl would
ever want in a guy.
But she wasn't any girl, she tried to remind herself.
The day before that he was telling her about some of his friends and how they
were like. He told her jokes that made her laugh and he made comments that made
her blush and at times, made himself blush too. One point, while they were
looking at the barren land of Mars, he said out of the blue, "You have such
sad blue eyes."
She stared at him with surprise. "Why do you say that?" She asked.
"I just feel that when you're happy, truly happy, they would look
more beautiful than they already do." He said, his cheeks colored the
moment the words flew out of his mouth. She too became red on the face and she
muttered a thank you to him and quickly suggesting it was time for them to go back.
She stopped suddenly as a thought came to her mind. She summoned the chain
out of nowhere, the golden chain appearing in her hand. On the chain was a
golden ring. It was simple, with the exception of the encrypted message.
"Immortality."
Her mother, Queen Serenity, gave it to her. She didn't know what was the
purpose of the ring and what the message really meant. Upon asking her mother,
the queen instead smiled mysteriously.
"You will know, my dearest. You will know."
Before she could ponder beyond that, her doorbell rang, announcing Gohan's
arrival.
"Who were you in your first life?" Asked Gohan suddenly.
She looked up from the homework she was working on to his curious face. She
smiled softly. "I was called Serenity at that time and I lived on the
Moon."
"I heard from Piccolo-san you were the Tsuki no hime."
A nod was all he got for an answer as she went back to work. The crescent
moon on her forehead shone for a brief moment before the light died out once
more.
"What's that symbol on your forehead?" He asked.
She looked at him with an amused expression. "You're more curious than a
kitten." She commented, which drew a blush on his face, before answering.
"It's the crescent moon of the White Moon Kingdom. It's who I am."
"Usa, I want to know more about your past." Gohan said, swallowing.
"Will you tell me?" He asked with caution.
She put her pen down on her paper and gaze at his face.
Sometimes she felt as if she was the teacher and he was the curious young
student. Other times however, it would be vice versa. And there are times when
she felt as if she was still an ordinary girl with no one other than him to
worry about.
"My name was Tsukino Usagi. I was a normal school girl who had problems
with the gravitational pull of the Earth." She began. Upon seeing Gohan's
blank look she blurted out, "I was a klutz."
"Oh." This caused him to snicker slightly.
"I had a best friend called Naru but no boyfriend. That is until the day
I stumbled upon the black cat with a crescent moon on her forehead." She
smiled in recollection. "Luna, the cat, had been the one to reveal to me my
other identity as the Tsuki no Senshi. I was to protect the Earth from the on
coming plots of the Dark Kingdom. I had no idea of my memory as the Moon
Princess at this time for my memory and my senshi's had all been erased during
our rebirth. One by one my senshi began to appear as we fought the forces of the
Dark Kingdom." She paused for a moment.
"I didn't remember of my past until Endymion was hurt." She said
softly.
"Who is Endymion?"
"Endymion is...was the Prince of my Earth. And the one I was destined
to be with. But that had been out of duty and nothing else. I
never really felt love with him. Only a strong sense of compassion mixed with
friendship and the love of a sister to an older brother." She explained.
"I see. So you had to be with him regardless of the fact that you didn't
love him?"
She nodded. "My friends and I, the sailor senshi as we called ourselves,
fought the Dark Kingdom. It took both my strength and Endymion's to defeat the
Dark Kingdom. There were just too many battles fought after that...I cannot
recollect. But I do remember, most vividly, the day it all went wrong." She
paused.
She didn't know whether she should continue or not. Gohan reached out and
touched her hand. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." He
said quietly.
She shook her head. "It's time for someone to know. I cannot live as the
only person to know this." She whispered. She swallowed and then continued.
"A new force of evil descended upon my Earth and for some unknown
reason it did not do anyone or anything any harm. It simply sat and watched as
we went on with our lives. But I knew of its existence and I couldn't sit still.
I knew what it was and what it was able to do. But I had doubts of whether or
not I should do something before it attacked." She looked up and looked at
Gohan in the eye.
"I attacked it first without consent from my friends. I've made errors
all of my life and never have I made such a fatal error before." She closed
her eyes at this point. "Its power was beyond my capabilities and my
comprehension. I never knew such strength existed in the Cosmos.
Attacking it was a futile attempt.
It merely made it angry and finally drew it out of the shadows and made it
attack. The first attack had been merely a test of strength. My friends were
killed in the attack but they were brought back to life. We all thought we won
the war."
Her eyes began to water at this point. And the tears fell from her face and
her voice grew bitter as she struggled on.
"But we were wrong. We didn't even harm it. It hid once more, into
the depths of my Earth to watch us once more. And at the moment when we
thought we had found peace, it attacked. The sheer power of the first attack
killed half of the planet. But it was just beginning. My friends struggled on,
tried to hang on to save the planet we all have grown to love over the years. I
begged the aid of other warriors, the Starlights. But even with their help, we
were mere insects to this weapon. This...destructive force. My friends were
killed in the second attack. I was on my own once more. I gathered my strengths,
evolving into a warrior that was not suppose to appear until thousands of years
in the future. I gathered the strength of the stars and planets, begged for more
strength to the ancient powers. I had no idea, when I pleaded...."
She fell silent. He was about to rush over to her side to comfort her, when
she began to speak once more.
"It was destroyed. Although not completely, for it would destroy the
balance of the Cosmos if it was. It was forced back to a new prison, where it
would not do harm to others. But it was far too late, this salvation. Earth had been completely destroyed. It was impossible for my friends to live once
more and they are forced to roam as mere apparitions and lights in the dark
corners of the galaxies. And this...was my punishment."
She looked out the window at this part, but never paused on her story.
"I pleaded to the ancients to lend me strength the fight the evil, but I
never realized the consequences of such an action. An old friend came to me, to
explain the devastating truth about my Earth. And she had to bear the burden
of telling me what I have done, not only to my friends but also to myself.
By receiving the powers of the ancient, I have also accepted a string
attached to the gift. I became the most powerful being in the Cosmos. I have the
ability to create and destroy everything in my will. But the power to create,
they have taken away from me. I wanted to beat the evil being so badly that I
vowed to destroy it every single chance I had if I were to be given the power of
the ancient.
I had no idea, at this time what a mistake I made at making this vow and
plea. I thought I would only have to beat this enemy a couple of times in
different realities, instead I am forever bound to go from reality to reality to
search for any sign of this evil being and for me to purify it. And that being,
I have to destroy the Cosmos in that reality itself so time would repair the
damages. But in order to do that, I have to kill countless lives and have to
see Earth being destroyed over and over again before my eyes and by my own two
hands. I never realized the consequences of asking the ancients for strength to
protect my Earth and for that mistake...I must face an eternity of
destruction.
For I am Shi no Tenshi, the Preserver of Good and the Destroyer of
Lives."
She kept her head down, she didn't want to face him. The voice inside her head was screaming at her for telling him her past. He hadn't the right to ask. She had no business telling him! At the inner turmoil, she looked up at him and find she couldn't bear his pitying eyes. She felt ashamed of herself, crying like a little girl when her duty, above all, was a task that even an adult could even carry.
"Now you have heard my story. And now," She got up. "I must ask you to leave." She opened the door of the apartment and held it open.
His mouth was wide open at this, but he shut it and picked up his books. As
he was about to walk out, he stopped before her. He did not look at her, but
instead look out the door and spoke.
"I understand why you would want to isolate yourself from living beings.
But by blaming yourself and wallowing in self-pity you will never be able to
accomplish anything.
You are immortal, you have seen all and you know almost everything. But you
don't know this. There are people who care. There are people who want to help
you, but if you keep on pushing them away, you will always stay in the abyss
that you are in.
When I fought Cell, all those years ago, I tried not to fight. And let him beat me senseless and all that time, I was asking myself over and over, how could my otou-san do that to me? He practically gave me to Cell on a silver platter." He paused and let out a short laugh.
"Of course what I didn't know was that he was only pushing me to my limits. He had so much faith in me, even more than I did in myself. I guess that was his way of showing his love to me. Demo, I thought at that time that I stood alone. I now know that I was mistaken, my otou-san was with me all the way. And it's the same thing with you now, Usa. I am here for you. Don't think that I'm not. I ask because I care, I offer my help because I care." He turned to look at her.
There was no pity in his eyes, there was only understanding. And the deep understanding of the pain she went through nearly caused her to gasp, if it hadn't been for her long term practice of never showing what she feels inside.
"Don't let yourself drown, Usagi. At least, not alone. I know someone's failed you once, not giving out a hand to you as you drown in your sorrow. Demo, it's different this time.
Do not dwell on mistakes you have done in the past. What is done cannot be undone, demo while you couldn't save your Earth, you can save yourself." He was silent for a while, looking into her eyes. And for a brief moment, the shield she had over her eyes fell. And he saw the turmoil within her, the part that was trying to break free and the part that held it back.
There was nothing much he could do for her, it was her decision, whether or not she was going to let someone help her this once or be forever alone. He let out a sigh and walked out of the door.
She stared at a distant space in silence, as the tears kept on falling. They
were not tears of sadness or self-pity any longer. They were the tears of
longing.
She looked up at the clock on the wall.
3:17 AM
She hadn't slept at all. Staring into the darkness of the apartment, her eyes had gotten used to the dark long ago. She lived in the shadows, so she has grown accustomed to the dark. She laughed bitterly. Gohan was right, she was afraid. She longed for light and yet, she feared the sun's rays.
She had waited long ago for that helping hand to pull her out of the whirlpool that she was sucked in. Demo no matter how hard she shouted and how long she pleaded, no one came. That hand never reached her. And for such a long time, she thought, no one would ever understand her misery.
Iie.
She didn't want to drown anymore. If this was the only chance she has of happiness, so be it. She'd take it. No matter what the risk might be. She had to talk to Gohan...Now. Demo, how will she do that? She didn't know his phone number, well, she wouldn't call him anyway. It would only anger his okaa-san. And from the stories he told her about his okaa-san, she's the worse person to talk to when angry.
Suddenly, she knew how. Telepathy.
She hadn't the gift of it of course, but the first time she had seen Gohan she knew what she felt. Her eyes had seen the line that connected their souls, how ever different they could be. Though he did prove that they are not as different as she would think, at this she smiled softly. Closing her eyes, she began to send her thoughts to him.
'Gohan.'
It was like a whisper at first and he had dismiss it for a dream. But the second was slightly louder, as if the person was right next to him. He sat up, trying to see who was there.
'Gohan, can you hear me?'
His eyes widened as he suddenly recognize the voice. "Uh. Usa?" He asked quietly. The soft sound of her laughter reached his ears and he suddenly smiled at the sound.
'Gohan, you don't have to speak. Just through your mind, I can hear you.'
"How-" He stopped. 'How did you do this?' There was a silence. She was debating whether or not to tell him what she knows. But she quickly ruled that it's for him to find out.
'One of those extras that came with the job.'
'Why are you calling me, Usa?' He asked. He wanted to know whether or not she was angry at him, after what he said. He had seen anger in her eyes too, besides the pain. And he didn't know who the anger was directed at.
He heard her sigh. 'You're right, Gohan. I am afraid. And I have never had anyone understand me like you have and...I guess that frightened me too. Demo, I'm calling you because I need a favor.'
'Anything Usa.'
'Can you take me somewhere, so I can forget about who I am for just a day?'
He had thought he heard wrong for a moment, but after a while, he knew she must have said it. He grinned. He was more than willing to help her. And he knew the perfect distraction for her.
'I'll be at your place by ten o'clock. We'll skip school tomorrow.'
'Not tomorrow, I have to do something. The day after.'
'All right. I'll see you then.'
'See you. And Gohan?'
'Hai?'
'Ayasumi.'
'Ayasumi Usa.'
