Chapter 13
The Planet Vulcan
Stardate 2248.4
Spock of Vulcan stepped onto the desert plain of his homeland. It was night time by the time he got there. The stars were bright and enchanting. For a brief moment he looked up at them. He made out the tiny dot in the west. It was the Earth.
As a youth he had spent a vast amount of his time sitting on the hills just watching the stars twinkle and glow as if mesmerised. One day he had wished to travel among them. They had always been out of reach of him because his father had planned out his son's future. He was to join the science academy on Vulcan.
Spock had gone against his father's wishes and left to join Starfleet Academy on Terra. It had caused an eighteen-year rift between father and son.
Spock was once again was on home soil. He hadn't stepped on Vulcan for more than six Vulcan months. Something felt wrong, but something deep down inside him he knew it was a logical thing to do. His career concerning Starfleet was now over. But do I really belong here, he thought to himself.
He glanced up at the velvet sky, once again toward the Earth. No one knew he was coming here. No one knew he had joined the Science Academy all except the tutors. He had enrolled via the Starfleet communications grid on the Stargazer.
Tomorrow all his possessions would arrive by freighter. As for now all he possessed was what he carried with him. Spock wore a desert suit suitable for travelling across desert land. He had decided to travel by foot so as to get reacclimatized to the thin, warm atmosphere.
In the distance he could make out the lights of the city, his home. All was quiet except for the occasional nocturnal desert creature. The stars lit his path towards home for there was no moon orbiting Vulcan.
On a clear night at Gol, one could see the two huge near by planets. It was the only part of Vulcan where these space bodies could be witnessed. He had seen them many times at night when he lived as a Kolinahr postulant some twenty or more years ago.
Spock stepped down from the desert towards a nearby street.
All was quiet except for the hum of aircraft. Rarely did people venture out this late at night. Perhaps a few tourists, but the streets were more or less deserted. Quietly he travelled down the dusty street towards Sarek's humble estate. Surprisingly the electronic gate was unlatched. He wondered why.
Spock frowned in puzzlement when he caught the glimpse of a young girl inside the inner-lit front room. She appeared to be reading. Spock saw her look at him through the transparency. Suddenly the front door opened and she stepped out side.
Who could that is this late at night? She wondered as she stared at the shadowy figure walking up the path.
Then she saw him. Openly she gasped with shock. Spock stared down at her, one eyebrow raised nearly to his hairline. The strange girl suddenly ran frantically back inside.
Sarek was standing in the centre of the living room when Spock finally let himself in. Surprise filled the elder Vulcan's usually passive face.
"Spock!" He said.
"Father?" Spock said with alarm. Sarek frowned.
"Forgive her sudden outburst. She is young and was not expecting anyone this late at night."
"Who is she?"
"A guest," Sarek replied.
Sarek's eyes peered at him so intently that his glare could cut metal. "Why are you here?"
"I have left Starfleet and have enrolled in the academy here on Vulcan. I wish to..." He paused contemplating what to say next. "...I am pursuing a career in diplomacy Father." Sarek raised a startled brow.
"What brought this on my son?" He asked.
"My life in Starfleet is completed. I simply..." He almost said feel. "...I could not continue with something that was pointless. As you are well aware I have never deemed of value the position of command. Therefore I have returned home."
"I see," said Sarek. He sat back down. "You must be hungry. There is food in the kitchen if you wish to help yourself.
"Thank you father, but I must decline. I am rather fatigued." Spock headed toward the stairs. Sarek nodded at him. He paused and remembered that T'Sharl was using his old room. Spock stopped and sensed that his father was about to say something else.
"Wait," he called. "Your have to use the guest room. T'Sharl is staying in your room." Spock knotted his brows together.
"I see." He turned again. " I shall see you in the morning. Good night father." Spock caught sight of the girl peering down the stairs hiding behind the wall.
"Good night my son," replied the other Vulcan. Spock made his way upstairs and across the landing only to be intercepted by that girl. She stood in his door way. Evidently she had been listening to their conversation downstairs.
"Captain Spock," she said calmly, "It is an honour to meet you sir." Spock cocked his head on one side. She had not known that he had noticed her watching them.
"I am...pleased to meet you too," he said. She averted her face from his stony glare. "If you will excuse me. I am tired." Spock paused dramatically. "Also it is quite impolite to eves drop other people's conversations."
"Forgive me." Spock passed her at the doorway. "Good evening..." She nearly said father. Spock stared intrigued.
Who is this girl living here? He thought.
"Good night," he said and entered the guest room. T'Sharl hesitated for just a second. He wasn't how she had expected him to be in person. He had an austerity about him. She couldn't believe it all over again that she was his daughter. Finally she left for her own room.
Spock awoke early. The sky was still black. He found no sense just lying there so he got up, dressed and went down stairs. To his surprise T'Sharl was sitting alone in the darkness. He reached over and picked up the environmental remote control unit then adjusted the light. From her appearance it appeared that she hadn't slept at all and she didn't seem to notice him enter the room. Spock sat down.
"Are you ill?" He asked. She jumped.
"No, sir." She shook her head and stared down at the floor and smoothed the creases in her pearly night robe. "I could not sleep. That is all."
Evidently you have not slept at all, he thought. For some time they sat in silence with only the ticking of Amanda's grandfather clock for company. "Are you hungry?" Spock said at last. He got to his feet and wandered over toward the food replicator situated in a wall panel. She shook her head once more.
"Thank you, but I do not feel very hungry." Spock said nothing and ordered himself an Altair water. A favourite drink of his accompanied with toast and butter which was an traditionally an Earth breakfast as well as Vulcan. Spock sat down and took a sip of the water.
"Obviously there is something on your mind." She half glanced at him.
"I am sorry that I offended you last night. I was not expecting..." Her voice faded. Spock frowned.
"Have I met you before?" He asked. Something about her was strangely familiar.
"Oh, no," she said defiantly. She defiantly seemed familiar in some way. Spock caught her eyes. He frowned in puzzlement. They were clear unsaturated blue. Perhaps she had mixed blood. That would explain her emotionalism.
T'Sharl clasped her hands together to stop them from trembling. Why was she feeling like this? She was behaving illogically. She wanted to tell him. To tell him everything, but how? She felt, as she believed her mother had felt. Embarrassment and stupidity. He has to know, she decided. But how do I tell him? Mentally she sighed. She had to say something. Something that would give a hint. Whether he'd see it.
"Captain Spock..." She stopped and prepared herself. It was now or never. It was illogical to withhold the truth forever. The longer she waited the harder it would be. He glanced up from his toast. T'Sharl swallowed hard, swallowed down the nausea she felt. Alien emotions swept through her like nothing she had ever felt. It was terrible. "...Sir..." She took a deep breath. "...There is something you need to know." She stopped and felt quite sick. All colour seemed to drain from her face.
"You appear quite unwell. Perhaps-" He stood up. She interrupted him.
"No. I must speak it out." He sat back down again. "You are... Your are my father." T'Sharl said quickly with one breath. He stood up abruptly. Uncontrolled emotion flashed across his face, then it was gone.
"You are quite unmistaken for it is quite impossible-" She interrupted him once more.
"I believe you know my mother."
"I do?"
"Yes." She nodded and flicked back a dark curl of hair off her face. "My mother, she was your protégé." She paused. "Saavik." Spock felt his legs buckle beneath him and he sat down abruptly. It had to be an elaborate lie. It was obvious, but the girl was also a civilised Vulcan. Logic did not permit her to lie. Spock however found it almost incomprehensible.
How could there be a possibility to this? True he had felt something for the young woman, but it was something he could never admit to and he had never let those emotions over sway his judgement and senses.
Saavik had been nothing more than a young girl. If she had permitted this to happen he surely would have declined her offer of intimacy.
He gazed at the girl who claimed she was his daughter. It was completely impossible. What she had said was ridiculous. Saavik had been a very important person in his life, someone who he could admit to himself that he cared for, but now she was so far away. He hadn't seen her in twelve years.
After remembering when he woke up from the refusing ceremony on Vulcan twelve years back it suddenly occurred to him why she may have been so distant. Every time she had tried to establish conversation back then, she had been lost for words. Spock remembered her trying to tell him something, but she had been unable to.
Undoubtedly he must have undergone Pon Farr on the Genesis planet due to the regeneration of his body, but it hadn't really occurred to him until now that Saavik may have been directly involved. He had remembered nothing following those few hours after he had died while aboard the Enterprise. He did recollect someone saying that he had been bought to Vulcan from the Genesis planet.
Spock gazed at the girl and frowned. She still looked ill. Why was she saying this to him? There were methods to test if she was really his offspring, but was it really necessary? What she had said was so overly outrageous.
Spock then remembered James Kirk's words about Genesis. "They found you as a little kid and you grew up at an extraordinary accelerated rate. It was Proto matter caused it. We had to get you off that planet as soon as possible. That was something I sure hell wouldn't like to repeat again. But as things usually go my friend there were problems."
Spock decided that he must review the reports, which had been made about the Genesis. Despite the reports being top secret there had to be some limited information regarding the project made by crew personal who were involved. There may be some information in the Vulcan science academy.
T'Sharl did appear quite similar to how Saavik had looked at the same age. Spock realised he was being swayed by the notion. She may well be Saavik's daughter, but he was defiantly not her father.
Saavik would have told him. She knew him well enough to at least say something didn't she? Had she tried the few days before the Klingon Bird Of Prey took off and left Vulcan early in twenty-two eighty-six? Spock couldn't accept it. This girl was nothing more than a stranger to him. Nothing had happened between himself and Saavik. They weren't even bonded.
Any advances before marriage was considered disgraceful on Vulcan. The girl was lying. Spock looked at her once again. She was the correct age, she had the same facial characteristics that Saavik had and something else. Spock suddenly noticed an unmistakable resemblance to Amanda.
"It is impossible," he said. "What you are saying is ludicrous. Why do you say such nonsense?" Spock felt his wall of restraint crumbling yet again. T'Sharl said nothing. "You are a Vulcan." Once again he got up and prepared to leave.
"Please, don't go." She came over to where he was standing. She reached out. "Please." She repeated. He finally complied and sat down. "You must believe what I say is true. I understand how you must... feel," she said very quietly "Ambassador Sarek. He-"
"It is impossible," he said repeatedly.
"It is not. It's true I am your daughter." Spock moved his eyes and fixed them at a point on the wall.
"How can you be? I do not even recollect how..." He sat lost in thought trying to remember something that did not, could not have happened. T'Sharl cautiously knelt down beside him.
"Saavik said it happened on the Genesis planet."
"Genesis," he said quietly. He looked into her large blue eyes. Then why didn't she tell me? He asked himself yet again. Was he finally beginning to accept the girl's unbelievable words were true?
"Mother kept it from me too," she said. "Amanda told me when I was six. Mother only admitted it to me two days ago. I was aboard the USS Lincoln at the time and I approached her about it when I declared that I was to return here and join the academy and study archaeology."
"I do not understand why Saavik would want to keep something like this from me. All this time." He shook his head. Was she afraid? Saavik is never afraid. "I will contact your mother," he said with a hint of irritation in his voice. T'Sharl grabbed his arm. Spock stared at her. His gaze penetrating. She was so emotional.
"I don't think that's wise," she said hesitantly.
"Does she not know that you have told me?"
"She mentioned I could, but Father..." He looked deep into those eyes so much like Saavik's except for the colour. They were glistening. T'Sharl averted them. Tears began to form. Why did she feel like this? What was happening to her? The word father sounded strange, inappropriate and completely unnecessary to him.
"I am sorry," he said finally and very quietly. He decided she was telling the truth.
"I do not lie," T'Sharl said. Spock nodded.
"Forgive me for not believing you. It is just that I do not remember any of it T'Sharl." He looked across at her. "T'Sharl your name means, New Dawn." He reached out his hand to her. She took it. "I never thought in my wildest imagination that I would discover that I had a daughter."
"Then you are not angry with me?"
"No." He shook his head. "I must however contact your mother. Please remember that this it is not your responsibility, or your fault." She looked down at the floor. Nothing could persuade him otherwise.
"Father..." He looked up at her. "Please forgive mother."
"There is nothing to forgive T'Sharl."
"Thank you."
"Does Sarek know?" He said. She nodded coyly.
"I was trying to tell you. Yes. He knows too. He had wanted mother to contact you for a long time. I'm not sure whether she would have told me about you at all. I think she was ashamed." Spock raised a startled Vulcan eyebrow.
"Why? I do not understand why Saavik would believe that. What is done is done. It can not be reversed," he said remembering Doctor McCoy's words. T'Sharl said nothing. She gathered he was a little offended.
Spock got to his feet. "I must go. I wish to contact your mother."
"Yes of course."
Spock stepped over to the communications system. The communication network was open. It would only take a few minutes to establish contact with the Lincoln.
Spock had waited for over fifteen of those minutes and to no avail. The officer sitting at the consol peered at him nervously and shook his head. "I'm sorry sir, the ship appears to be out of range for personal calls. Perhaps if you try again later." Spock nodded.
Finally he gave up. "Very well," he said without even a hint of disappointment in his voice. "I will try again later." There had definitely been a problem somewhere. Every time the young Starfleet communications officer had tried to establish a link he had been greeted with the deafening sound of static.
The young lieutenant managed a forced smile then the communications screen went dark. Spock came back into the room. His expression was as passive as ever. "I could not make contact. I believe that there is a communication block somewhere."
