Ryuichi walked into NG studios in the normal fashion, adorned in a big T-shirt and bright red pants, and of course his Kumagorou was being clutched in his arms as he nuzzled it with his cheek. Nothing seemed particularly different about him, right down to the lost, confused look he always seemed to wear wherever he went. He had a feeling that he had forgotten something, though this was nothing out of the ordinary, seeing as though he forgot everything every day. Luckily, Tohma knew about his forgetful nature, and therefore had nailed up a bulletin board to the wall right next to the elevators where he could post things that Ryuichi needed to remember.
However, today, like most days, Ryuichi forgot to look at the bulletin board to see what he forgot, thus ended up wandering aimlessly around the halls in one of the upper levels, bored out of his mind. He wasn't quite sure what he was supposed to be doing, but being easily distracted, he had no time trying to remember before his attention was diverted. Strangely enough, Ryuichi found his mind wandering to none other than Yuki Eiri. Or rather, what Yuki had done. It was the strangest thing, Ryuichi decided. For some reason, after Ryuichi had gotten out of the shower, Yuki made him give his key back. Ryuichi didn't know why Yuki wanted that key, since he had another one, actually two considering that he had taken Shuichi's.
Maybe that key was special to Yuki. That was probably it. Ryuichi didn't mind giving Yuki that key. He had no particular attachment to it. It wasn't that important. Ryuichi couldn't figure out why one key would be so special to anybody when it had two duplicates that were exactly like it. Yuki was a strange person. But that's okay, because Ryuichi was sure to just take one of the duplicates that Yuki wasn't quite so attached to.
"Na, Kumagorou…" Ryuichi said, placing Kumagorou on the ground in front of him and staring into those beady black eyes. "Sorry I couldn't take you to see Yuki-san, but then I wasn't sure what Yuki-san would do so in case he took me hostage I thought that if I didn't come back you could go get some help." Ryuichi nodded his head assertively to accent his words.
Kumagorou stared at him. The lights in the hallway were bright, making little white pinpricks of light that shone on the upper right hand corner of its black eyes.
"Uhn? Don't you forgive me, Kumagorou?" Ryuichi asked.
Kumagorou continued to stare at him.
"Kumagorou?" Ryuichi said. He pouted at his little friend and crossed his arms in irritation. That pose only lasted a few seconds, though, because when Kumagorou still didn't respond, Ryuichi grabbed its ear and flung it across the hallway where it smacked against the wall and made an echoing click when one of the eyes collided with the floor.
Ryuichi stared at the crumpled heap of pink angrily for a few seconds before his eyes began to gather tears. He knelt down and picked up the stuffed rabbit, dusting it off and noticing a dark spot on its head that he had never seen before. He wondered if it was the beginning of a bruise.
"Kumagorou! I'm so sorry!" Ryuichi cried, hugging the rabbit tightly as the tears began to flow down his cheeks at an alarming rate. "I didn't mean it, I swear! I'll get a doctor!" He stood up and darted down the hallway, cradling Kumagorou tenderly. He didn't stop once, not even to catch his breath from running up two flights of stairs because waiting for the elevator would take too long, just in case Kumagorou was on the brink of death and every second counted. He reached his destination quickly and swung open the door. Although out of breath, the years of singing had done wonders to his lungs; after the long run, he was still able to take a deep breath and let out a resonating, "TOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMAAAAAAAA!!!"
Upon spotting his long-time friend, however, his eyes widened as all worry vanished from his mind, and the pink rabbit fell to the ground, forgotten.
It wasn't really as though they were doing anything wrong, really. Shuichi had squirmed back into his own chair, and although his hair was rumpled and his shirt was hanging off his shoulder, he was acting pretty normal with only a trace of sheepishness hidden in his movements. Tohma was smiling, as ever, and acting as though he had not just been caught kissing Shuichi.
"What is it, Ryuichi-san?" Tohma said calmly, still smiling.
Ryuichi frowned as he pulled back his foot and let it fall forward, sending Kumagorou bouncing further into the office. Shuichi stood up awkwardly and picked up the stuffed rabbit with shaking fingers.
"Sakuma-san," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He stepped towards Ryuichi and held up the rabbit, though he was only met with a distant gaze from a pair of wide blue eyes. The gaze only lasted a few seconds, however, before it fell into a worried frown as Ryuichi snatched Kumagorou back into his own arms and hugged it gingerly.
"Poor Kumagorou!" Ryuichi sang, shifting his weight from one foot to another. "I'm being so mean today. I'm sorry."
He paused and stared at Shuichi for a moment before his gaze slid to Tohma, who was watching him curiously with his arms folded over his chest. Ryuichi grinned, even though his mouth was halfway hidden by Kumagorou's head, and lifted the rabbit's small arm in a wave.
"You guys are gross," Ryuichi said as he stepped backwards through the doorway and grasped the handle. "I thought people only did that stuff in books." With that, he pulled the door shut and, placing Kumagorou securely on his head, slowly sauntered away, still unsure of what he was supposed to be doing. Perhaps he should have asked Tohma, but then he forgot, and he decided he shouldn't go back now because the two would probably be going at it again. With a dissatisfied sigh, Ryuichi made his way towards the front doors. Maybe he should just go home. That sounded like fun.
Or, at least more fun than having to see Tohma and Shuichi together.
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After hours of picking out every single spot of pink in the crowd with the vain hope that it might possibly be Shuichi, Yuki found himself forgetting what the color pink looked like altogether, and instead began focusing on all different shades of red, and, beyond that, once he even noted how much a small navy blue handbag an old woman was carrying reminded him of the color of Shuichi's hair.
Yuki was beginning to realize that he was obsessed. He had fully understood what he had been doing when he had rejected Shuichi in such utterly cruel ways beforehand again and again. He knew what possible effects it would have on the cheerful singer's psyche; in fact, he had been depending on those effects to cause Shuichi to hate him so that maybe the brat would leave him alone and he could have a few moments of some peace and quiet so that he could work on his novels.
Now, however, the so-called peace and quiet was suffocating him. He was dependant on Shuichi. He had taken for granted that the brat always came back again and again, no matter how many times he was insulted and kicked out. It had made Yuki believe that he really did love him, though now it seemed that Shuichi only came back because he had no one else to go to.
Unconditional love. As long as there was no one else.
But wasn't that a condition?
Yuki sighed and shifted uncomfortably in the public bench that he was currently occupying, and had been for the past two hours. He had retreated onto the streets just to have a touch of hubbub so that he could breath again. Shuichi's absence was killing him. He couldn't write, he couldn't sleep, he couldn't eat. He was going to slowly starve to death and it would all be Shuichi's fault.
"You should go home," he said aloud to himself, knowing it to be true. He was baking in the sun; judging by how his life had been going the past few days he would wake up the next morning fried to a crisp and barely able to move in a severe sunburned state. If he didn't starve to death, perhaps surviving off the stored strawberry pocky that Shuichi had collected for nearly a year once he ran out of all other food, being too lazy to go shopping ever, he would surely die of Shuichi-induced melanoma. Either way, his imminent doom was swiftly approaching, and it was all Shuichi's fault. Everything was always Shuichi's fault.
Yuki pushed himself to his feet as he pulled the last cigarette out of the pack and pushed it into his mouth. His lungs were burning, seeing as though he had bought this pack just before he had sat down on that bench, though Yuki ignored the horrible sensation and lit the cigarette quickly with the lighter he had bought along with the cigarettes; his old lighter was too bothersome, seeing as though he could not peel off that sticker picture of Shuichi on it, and therefore it found a new home in the trash can.
"Go home now," he muttered to himself, just quietly enough so that only he would hear to ensure he would not make a fool out of himself by talking to himself in front of complete strangers. As he walked, he decided to make a vow not to think about the pink-haired brat for the rest of the day; however, just as he thought that, memories of all the wonderful times he'd had with that very brat began flooding his mind. As he retreated into his own head, he saw only enough to make sure he would not run into anything, though most of his brain began to dwell on the one who, just two days ago, had been the most important person to him. Who still was the most important person to him.
A small silver earring, a birthday present, that had come with the words, "I know you said you didn't want a present, but I thought since your ear's pierced anyway, I'd get it for you. I think it'll look really nice."
"You say everything looks nice on me," he had replied coolly, throwing the earring onto the table.
Shuichi had looked so hurt then, it made Yuki's heart clench. He didn't cry. He merely looked at the earring sadly, as if Yuki had rejected him instead. "It's because I love you," he had said softly.
Yuki pulled the cigarette out of his mouth and dropped it on the ground, silently wishing that he had bought two packs instead of one. He sighed heavily and fingered the ring in his ear—the truth was, he had only said that to be an annoying bastard, like usual. It did look good on him. He had just been so petty. It was why Shuichi had gone to Tohma, he assumed. Tohma would never say or do things like that. Yuki couldn't blame him…
"What the hell am I thinking?" Yuki hissed, though still quietly so the passersby would not hear. "Tohma's got no chance against me. What kind of idiot would choose him?" He frowned determinedly, just as a dark shadowy figure rushed towards him, and Yuki had to jump to the side to avoid a collision. Returning to reality, he realized that the figure was actually a man in a business suit, who, although quite rude, was rather normal. Upon further inspection of his surroundings, Yuki found that he was standing just outside the NG Records building. Musing silently to himself, he wondered just how he had gotten there; he had to have walked at least to miles from the park bench to arrive there.
Glancing at his watch, he realized it was about an hour after he had last checked. Shuichi would still be working. If Yuki would just go through those double doors…his rehearsal was on the third floor, fourth door to the right…he would be there…singing, as always… There was nothing to it…just through those doors…
It required no debate. It was simple, and he was already there. He gathered his anger, just for effect so as not to lose his reputation, and pushed through the doors, though he did not make quite as much of an entrance as the last time just to make sure he wouldn't be hassled by the secretaries again.
However, as soon as he saw a certain someone hovering over the front desk giving instructions to a secretary, he realized that perhaps it did require a bit of debate. He had forgotten to consider that this person worked here too, and that he might possibly run into him before he did Shuichi. He suddenly felt like an idiot with nowhere to run; he had already noticed him.
"Eiri-san?" he asked, straightening his body and looking almost frightened, if possible.
"Seguchi," Yuki said, starting towards the elevators again. He was already past Tohma when the latter swung around and caught up to him quickly.
"What are you doing here?" he questioned, and Yuki could still sense a hint of something that resembled fear in his voice. He reached the elevator and pressed the up button, though he stood with his hands in his pockets and pretending to be indifferent to Tohma's presence, even though it irritated him immensely.
"I'm here to pick up the idiot," Yuki replied, deciding it best to tell the truth. He couldn't think of another excuse, and it was easier this way. Besides, it didn't matter at all as long as he did it in an exceptionally cool manner, being the cold Yuki who maybe because he had so much free time and nothing better to do he would pick up the brat.
"He called you?" That was hurt in his voice this time, Yuki decided. And that was not a good thing. Definitely not.
"No," Yuki replied angrily. The elevator opened, though Yuki paused before entering. "He hasn't come back for two days, you know."
"Of course," Tohma said. His voice was back to its usual snide tone. "You did kick him out, remember?"
"That doesn't mean he can't come back," Yuki replied, catching the elevator door just before it closed. He stepped inside, and Tohma followed quickly. "He always did before."
"Hmm, Eiri-san…" Tohma sighed. There was a cynical note to his voice, and Yuki felt as though Tohma knew something that he didn't. "I think we need to talk." With a smirk, Tohma reached out and touched the button on the elevator, to the floor for his office, and waited for the doors to close before he spoke again. "I don't believe Shindo-san will be returning."
Yuki lifted an eyebrow at Tohma, urging him to continue, though he had an ominous foreboding that he didn't want to know.
"It seems as though Shindo-san is not as loyal as you believed him to be. In fact, he is rather quick to desert you—"
"What did you do?" Yuki asked through clenched teeth, though more than anything he found himself nervous and dreading the answer.
"It wasn't entirely my fault. Shindo-san was more than willing," Tohma said. Yuki gripped the railing of the elevator tightly, willing himself not to smash Tohma's face with his fist, not to ruin the mocking smile he always wore.
"You…" Yuki hissed, glaring at Tohma fiercely, though the latter hardly noticed. He merely crossed his arms and smirked even more, remaining silent until the elevator dinged and opened. He tilted his head back to gaze at Yuki mockingly before speaking.
"I told you that staying with Shindo-san was not a good idea," he said, and then turned and strode out of the elevator. "I really must be getting back to work though. I shall see you later, but please do not hassle Shindo-san about this." He raised his hand in a wave without even turning around before turning a corner and disappearing from sight.
The doors closed soon after that, though the elevator remained stationary, having not been called on yet. Yuki sighed, and, running his hand through his golden locks, sunk into a sitting position against the wall. His hand slid to his ear, and he fingered the earring there gently in indecision before lowering his hand and closing his eyes sadly.
"What a waste," he whispered as the elevator started again in descent for the next passenger.
TBC
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Notes: Goodbye, humor… I salute your parting.
Well, I guess with all these Sorry-Yuki-I'm-Cheating-On-You fics have got to have some… drama… in them, but there is a logical reason for this, actually. That being, I am very depressed. There's a logical reason for that too. My first major grade of my English class this year, (an essay, yay) and I got a 64% (which in my class is an F). That makes my grade an 81% in the whole class, which is not enough to stay in honors, so if I don't raise to a 90-something % by the end of the quarter…or semester…or something, I'm not gonna be able to stay in honors. I'll be very sad then.
And then it goes something like this:
"Oh, what did you get on your essay?" that girl asks.
"64," I reply. "And you?"
"91. Can you believe that? I so could have done better than that," the girl says. I stare at her.
I really don't like essays. But something good, I got the first volume of the Gravitation graphic novel in English, and it is very happy yumminess. Only they all look so different from the series… Tohma is masculine, how frightening is that? And I'm reading along… and I say, "Wait, who is that?" Though upon looking at it further, I realize it's Shuichi. Seriously, he does not look like Shuichi. He looks like Ryuichi does in the original doujinshi "Help." (Which is a great doujinshi if you like explicit sex scenes…and can read kanji, a department in which I am lacking. It's about Sakuma Ryuichi, his guitarist Hiroshi, Uesugi Tatsuha the romance novelist, and Nettle Grasper!) Yeah… Enough notes? Yeah, I think so.
Until next time.
Cassi
