Title: Winds of Change

Author: Kary Starr

Ship: Harry/Hermione

Rating: PG-13/R

Summary: After the Great War, things have changed. Hermione learns to deal with what life is really about, and how to deal it-realizing that not everything can be handled on her own.

Genre: Angst, Romance, Humour

Story Canon: 1-5

AN: School has started back up and sorry to report, I thought senior year was supposed to be a lot of fun (YEAH right.I've had more homework in the last two weeks than I had almost in the span of last year.no, not really, but it is quite a bit of homework). So in other words, I've been busy. And then we broke our computer.again.and could not get online until we got a better anti-virus system, which meant, terribly, 5 weeks of waiting to even check my mail, because my school system is fucking anal retentive and feels the need to control every goddamn aspect of every waking moment. But enjoy this. I hope you do. Guess what: my friend Anita made me an awesome bracelet today. It's green and black and says, "Severus." Because I have so many chapters and really, so little to say, I think I will end this here and let you all read.because I know this is something you *so* want.

Disney movies rock.

"Family is just a dirty word for CENSORSHIP!"

Read and review.

* * *

Chapter Four: Green

* * *

Hermione awoke later that evening, and heard the murmured voices as people entered from their evening class. She stretched and the red blanket fell off her. She glanced down at it and sighed.

"Hermione, you're awake," Ron said, from behind her. She turned around and rested her arm on the back of the couch.

"Yeah, I am," she said. She noticed a small blonde girl sitting next to him, at his arm. It was Luna Lovegood. With Ginny and Dean Thomas, another seventh year Gryffindor (they'd been dating since the end of Ginny's fourth year). And they were sitting with Harry...and Cho.

"Are you feeling all right?" Harry asked, his arm resting on Cho's shoulders comfortably. They must have been talking; Hermione instantly felt like an intruder, gazing at the three couples.

"Um, fine," she muttered, standing. Her heart was hammering in her chest- her stomach plummeting and rising, like she was riding on a roller coaster of emotions. The one thing that she did not want to deal with right now was Cho and Harry.

"Hermione," Luna said, dreamily, looking quite peachy again, "may I talk to you for one moment?"

"Here?" Hermione said, picking up the blanket.

"No, outside," she continued, oddly reminding Hermione of Professor Trelawny, the Divination teacher. Luna stood and Hermione followed her out of the Gryffindor Common Room.

When they were alone, Luna turned to her, her pale eyes bright. "I can't believe what happened today, I just wanted to tell you..."

"Oh?" Hermione replied, looking at Luna with mild interest.

"Yes, when Ronald was wandering after his encounter with Parvati-she dumped him, of course, for Draco Malfoy, did you hear?" Hermione shook her head. Luna continued. "-anyway, he walked by me...and at the sight of him, I started to weep. He came over to me and asked me what was wrong. Ronald was never one for the obvious," she said pointedly. Hermione knew this, but didn't say anything. "He kindly put his arm around me and lead me to a chair. Of course, I could not tell him, but instead he was so kind about it-and then he said, 'Luna, why were you so upset the other day?' I replied, 'I was upset with you, Ronald.' He looked concerned, and then...reached over...and took my hand, ever so gently. 'I'm sorry, Luna,' he said quietly. And then I gave him a quick kiss on the lips-to tell him that he was forgiven. Well, Ronald thought it was much more than that, and he kissed me back." She sighed out loud happily. "It was bliss, Hermione."

Hermione smiled, not really wanting to smile, but knowing that was what she was supposed to do. "I'm so glad that you are happy, and Ron too," she said, giving Luna a hug. "He's so lucky-and you're good for him. Maybe you'll convince him that there are more emotions, and he can then have a tablespoon."

Luna grinned, her eyes sparkling. "I'm am very happy, Hermione." She walked over to the portrait. "Coming?"

She was looking away from Luna, tears threatening to fall. Oh, this emotion, much greater than any death, was eating her away more than she could even imagine. Now they are all happy-good for them, she knew. But what about her? Was it fair to be miserable to make sure that they were all happy? Was it fair to her?

Of course not, but she missed her chance. It was her fault. Or maybe it was fate. Either was, Hermione was consumed by jealousy of her friends.

"No," she said firmly, almost angry. She turned to Luna tears shining in her brown eyes. "Um, I'm going somewhere else. I think I'm gonna take a walk."

Luna was taken aback. "Hermione, you did not like Ronald, did you?" she asked suddenly.

"No, no, Luna," she said, with a sigh. "I do not like Ron. He's a great guy, but not the one for me. Um, Magellan," she said, turning to the Fat Lady, the portrait and entrance to the Gryffindor Tower, and she swung opened obediently. "I'll talk to you later."

Luna cocked her head and smiled sweetly. "All right," she said. "I shall see you later, then?"

Hermione nodded, biting her bottom lip. "Yeah," she replied softly. "See you."

Luna entered and the portrait swung closed. Hermione stared at it, though the Fat Lady was there, reading a book, not noticing her. Finally realizing herself, she walked away, and sat in the middle of the hallway, with her knees up and her head on the top. She tried to breathe steadily.

She should be doing her homework, not moping around. She regretted missing her classes, but at this point, she was wondering if that should be the only thing she concentrated on. Hermione was upset that she got so worked up over nothing-maybe she should just let them live on, not bothering them; after all, it's not like she's on the top of anyone's list anymore. She hated being single when all her friends had someone. Though, this here has never happened: never has Harry, Ron, Luna, and Ginny had other people. Even Neville was "sporting" a girlfriend-Susan Bones, in Hufflepuff. God, she was so lonely.

That, and she was sure that acting sulky would only get her as far as a blind date. Ugh, she could just see Ginny and Luna scheming to interfere. Lucky her. With that thought, she realized that she could not be sullen. She needed to be happy. Hermione needed to make sure that none of them decided that it would be a good idea to cheer her up with a "guy," one that she knew would never work. Why? Because her heart is set on another.

Hermione stood and made her way over to the Tower when she was stopped in the hall by none other than Draco Malfoy and his co-whore, Parvati Patil. They were...well...somewhere between making out and having sex, though Hermione did not want to witness either. She didn't know where to escape, so she turned around and was going to walk back, when a voice drifted to her.

"What could the little long-mollared bushy-haired Mudblood want at this hour?" Draco Malfoy drawled, with Parvati, wiping her mouth, grinning madly.

"I'm trying to get back to the Tower, you twitchy ferret," she spat, not wanting to deal with his shit right now.

He walked away from Parvati and over to her, setting a hand around her shoulders and pulling her in close. Hermione's body went stiff and, struggling, tried to free herself of his unwanted grip. Parvati started to giggle. God, she wanted to hit her. Hard.

"I actually think that Gryffindors aren't too bad anymore," he breathed into her ear. Parvati giggled even louder, and Hermione's hand spasmed in response to her untamed will to smack her.

"I know one that kisses very well," he continued, putting a hand on her chin and turning her face to his. She looked into his deep ice blue eyes with her narrowed brown ones. He grinned, his perfect teeth very, very close to her own. Though she wasn't grinning.

"Malfoy, if you don't get your hands off of me right now, I won't make the same mistake Lorena Bobbitt did, throwing it where the police could find it," Hermione hissed at him, though it did nothing to phase him. Lorena Bobbitt was a crazed Muggle woman; Hermione doubted he knew who she was.

Malfoy, if possible, leaned in close to her without actually touching her face. "Aw, what's a little harm? You don't have a boyfriend, and it's not like there's a line for Miss Hermione Granger, resident Mudblood, to be wanted, now is there?" And with that, he planted a kiss on her lips.

Hermione was stunned for a moment, not willing to register that one of her worst enemies was giving her something so sacred that she was saving for that one, namely Harry, should he ever get rid of Cho, and that Malfoy, of all people, was giving Hermione her first kiss.

She pushed him away, maybe a little too late, and wiped her mouth vigourously. "How do you catch girls with such a poor kiss?" she snarled, seriously grossed out.

"You certainly didn't seem to pull away quick enough, Granger-dear," Parvati said from the sidelines, giggling so hard that whatever made her smart was surely falling out of her head with all the banging around going up there. "What, never had one of those? That's what happens between two people that like each other, you know-they kiss, and maybe more."

"Well, I certainly know you've had much more," Hermione replied, her face red as the setting sun, "since you could probably write a dictionary with all the boys you've slept with...what, is Malfoy like, five thousand twenty?"

Parvati's makeup flushed, though she wasn't sure that the coloured five inches of blush and powder would qualify for any sort of embarrassment, and suddenly, Parvati had nothing more to say, her mouth clamped, and her lips pursed.

"Don't talk to my girlfriend like that, Granger," Malfoy said with a sneer. "That was uncalled for."

Hermione was now fuming, and she started to spit before she could think. "What," she bristled, "calling her a slut behind her back is better? Because that's what she is-boys may think she's pretty, but I call her used."

A resounding slap came from both sides, Malfoy walloping her left cheek and then her head snapped back to the left with a sting on the right, from Parvati. "How dare you!" she shrieked.

"You started this!" Hermione shouted back, hand prints on both cheeks. "You might think it's funny to do this, but when push comes to shove, you always lose!" And with that, Hermione stomped off to the Towers, leaving before any of them could say another word.

* * *

Hermione stormed into the Gryffindor Common Room, still angry and upset, trying desperately to rid her mind of that horrible, horrible thing that had happened just minutes ago. The people formerly known as "friends" ignored her angry walk of Death, lucky for them-though she was upset they didn't even ask what was wrong.

She went into her room, yanked open the maroon curtains and flopped onto the bed. Hermione felt tears, once again, stain her cheeks. Oh, that was surely going to get around the school-Hermione Granger, the good one, the smart one, the Mudblood, kissed Draco Malfoy, spawn of Satan and proud card- carrier of Assholes Anonymous.

Hermione felt like she was going to be violently sick, if it were not for Ginny, who had entered her room and sat at the edge of her bed.

"I heard," she said quietly, looking at the floor. Hermione raised her head and looked at her.

"What...what did you hear?"

"From Parvati," she said solemnly. "As she walked into the Common Room with Lavender. She said that you and Malfoy had kissed."

She groaned and shoved her head into her pillow. "I need a disinfectant," she mumbled into the sheet. "God, everyone's gonna know by tomorrow..."

"When Harry and Ron found out, they practically shoved each other aside to get out of the Common Room door. Cho was very upset about this, though I think it was Harry rushing out because of you that made her angry. Luna sat there with a smile plastered onto her face. I think she's getting a nasty idea to get Parvati back."

"Harry...and Ron know?" she said to Ginny, thankful that the pillow protected her from the blush that Ron's younger sister might see.

"Yep." She put her hand on Hermione's back. "You all right?"

"No," Hermione muttered, her shoulders shaking because she was going to cry. "It's not all right, oh my God, Malfoy kissed me! And it..." Hermione paused, then shook her head. Too humiliating if it got out that that was her first. "...it was a bad kiss too. He's a terrible kisser."

There was a pause. And uncomfortable pause.

"Ginny?" Hermione asked, looking up. "What is there? What?"

She cleared her throat. "Ah, Hermione," Ginny said gently, "that's what he said about you."

Hermione's stomach seized. Ugh. Not only did she have to endure the taunts of being kissed, but the taunts of being a poor kisser, too. And what if...a certain someone heard them? What if he believed them? Oh no, oh no...

Big fat tears streaked down and were sucked into the pillow. Hermione never felt more sick than she did now. Surely, surely, she felt worse when Harry was going to be vapourized before her eyes? No. Hardly. Hermione felt impending doom weigh heavily on her shoulders, seeping through her torso and settling into her stomach. Everything on her ached, like she'd run a marathon. And here, the youngest Weasley tells her calmly that Harry knows, and that supposedly she was a bad kisser. Hermione thought she was going to die.

"Ginny, can I be alone for a bit?" she asked timidly. Her eyes felt puffy, trying to restrain bawling, just for a couple more minutes...

"Yeah, Hermione," she said, standing up. "You know, if you want to talk, I'm down the hall. We never seem to talk anymore."

Yeah, you and everyone else... Hermione thought. Why was everyone so bloody insistent on her talking to them? Can't she just have some secrets to herself? Why can't they just leave...her...alone?

"Night, Ginny," Hermione mumbled to her red-haired friend, and closed the maroon curtains. When she heard the door click closed, Hermione's body felt that one needed release, and tears came flowing out of her, tears that had been pent up for so long.

There went her chance with Harry. After hearing Malfoy had kissed her, surely she was damaged? Lucky he did not do more, like his counterpart father has, no doubt, but kissing her was bad enough. Especially passing around sacred information like how good/bad she was. Hell if she knew she was decent or not; it's not like she'd had experience to compare it with.

A bit premature, isn't it? she thought. Perhaps. She didn't know if Harry would ever break up with Cho; they've had their rough patches over the last couple of months, constantly bickering, only to make up by making out. It saddened Hermione every time they forgave one another...just one more fight, she thought, one more and then they'll be done. Hermione was very petty about this, only in her mind-she certainly would never tell a soul this.

But every fight was followed by, "I can't live without you!" and then their relationship would be renewed. It irritated Hermione beyond anything she knew to see this happen.

But now it didn't matter. Hermione's been kissed by the King of Assholes, Draco Malfoy, and her pure reputation tarnished, surely to be embellished later on, especially if Viktor is dragged into this-she never kissed that missing link for nothing, but there was times when he was close on making his move. Ugh, Hermione thought he was nice, but he was not the one for her. To be perfectly honest, when she found out Krum had to be on his Quidditch Schedule, and couldn't see her at all, she was more than relieved. She wrote him letters, but eventually, the letters got further and further apart, until none came in reply. Then she found out on the news that Viktor was sporting a model from Hungary, and he was happy- Hermione knew that she was out of a potential boyfriend, thank God.

Ron shut up about it all-he never liked Krum, but that was only because, in late one night of sixth year, Ginny told her that Ron liked her. That was disturbing. She ignored it, and never told anyone she knew, and gave Ron no advances to take. That seemed to quiet him.

Of course, Hermione knew that Ron liked her all along, it didn't take Ginny or a genius to know that. Ron was so obvious about it, so protective, always trying to kip a seat next to her, always trying to be nice (when he could and wasn't bickering). In fact, before their fifth year, during the summer when they were cooped up at the Order of the Phoenix Headquarters (Sirius's mum's house), Ron was very close to her at times. Too close.

The only person she ever, ever wanted to be close to was Harry.

And Harry, unfortunately, was just too far away.

* * *

"Attention, attention please," Professor McGonagall said sharply. "Please, may I have your attention?" Her frazzled hair, gray with age and stress, fell out of its perfectly placed bun as she slapped her hand on the Head Table.

"I have two announcements today," she said, after clearing her throat and readjusting the square-rimmed glasses that perched atop her nose. "One is the new Head Girl and Boy, plus the House Prefects." The murmurs died down instantly; suddenly, the dinner-time chatter in the Great Hall was nothing but whispers of wind.

Hermione was looking forward to this after the last few days of taunting and terrorizing she'd experienced-namely from Slytherin-and Harry's absolute mission to avoid her at all costs. Cho must have made him; she wasn't there to keep an eye on him and there was nothing more she'd like to catch him in the act from her informant sources. Cho Chang was a very, very jealous girlfriend.

She was jealous of Hermione's attention from Harry.

For all that could be deduced, Hermione had no idea why-if Cho was half as jealous as Hermione was of she, Cho would be greener than a golf fairway. Hermione had already boiled over twice to these new couples, plain old walking out of the room when she felt the stinging sarcasm bit at her tongue, screaming to be flung her happy friends. Ginny and Dean were no new problem; Ginny was always too open with her relationship, often telling Hermione things she didn't want to hear, like how romantic he was on Valentine's Day (one of the good ones) or how Dean knew just where to touch her to make her scream (one of the worst ones).

Luna and Ron were relatively new, so they didn't pose as much a threat as normal-but they still were playing tonsil-hockey in the Common Room, apparently working for the top of the list after Ginny and Dean, or even worse, Parvati and Malfoy.

Oh, it was lucky, lucky for her that Mr. Malfoy was allowed into the Common Room, accompanied with the Whore-ific Parvati. And they certainly didn't hesitate to go at it. In front of everyone. But not before they threw a couple of comments her way. Her favourite part of the weekend was when Parvati invited Malfoy into the room the seventh year girls shared. Oh, Hermione certainly heard an earful that night, trying to sleep in the midst of Parvati's orgasmic throws of passion.

The weekend ended with Cho and Harry playing the "Let's Avoid Hermione" game, coming close to appearing to Apparate out of rooms she walked into (knowing full well, of course, that Hogwarts doesn't allow any sort of Apparating or Disapparating anywhere).

So, naturally, almost knowing full well she was going to be named Head Girl and was going to get her own room off the Gryffindor Common Room was something she was looking most forward to.

"Our Head Boy is Harry Potter," McGonagall stated. Harry, whom Hermione was absently watching, stood and went over to the Head Table to receive his pin. He was surprised, though. No other non-Prefect had ever become Head Boy since, Hermione assumed, his father. "And our new Head Girl is Hermione Granger." Hermione stood and went to the Table to stand by Harry, getting her own pin.

It was gold with a lion on it, a helmet with red feathers pouring from his top, and the words "Head Girl" calligraphed across the front. It pleased her. She, without thinking, turned to Harry and grinned.

Harry gave her a small smile and turned away from her. Hermione wanted to ask him what was wrong (why the hell won't he talk to her...?), but was cut short when she realized that she was surrounded by eight fifth years, all holding the Prefect pins as inquisitively as the first time she held her very own. The only Prefect from fifth year Gryffindor she recognized was the familiar mousy-haired Dennis Creevey, brother to Colin Creevey, who died in the Great War.

"You may all sit now," Hermione heard, and she reluctantly sat. Harry was Head Boy; this would make them closer, as both of them had to consult constantly about nearly everything. But Cho's disregard for her could make this difficult.

God, Cho was so stupid.

Hermione's attention was soon drawn, however, not from her envy-induced thoughts but to the second of McGonagall's bullets on the agenda.

"There will also be a ball, a sort of a Christmas celebration, open to fifth years and above, on December 21, the night before term ends. Only couples will be permitted; formal dress required. That is all."

On her right, Ginny squealed in excitement. "Oh, new dresses! That's wonderful!"

Yeah, Hermione thought. Wonderful.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I feel as if I should add some Tom Jones music here.

Sternite: No, it won't be a one-way love; I hope not, anyway.

Robaatsu: many more than just one! Hell, I think this'll be a very, very long story, or maybe I'll shorten it up. Dunno yet.

CNJ: Any girl can be jealous in any situation-I like to look at the perspective of, she's known him longer, and imagine unrequited love. It sucks.

Josie: it's not a dark lust story.^^ yeah, it is. By the way, I really wish I could go to NYC. I'm totally going to embarrass you guys when we go see The Producers. grin

sarahrae3391: Of course, I'll email you! Yay! An emailer!