I was hit by the full force of realisation. This entire situation made sense now. Gabriel expected that I was an authentic incarnation of the Monika who he interacted with in the game. That I would therefore be madly in love with him. Obviously I had to correct this misconception when I returned to his room.
But what would be the consequences, my cynical aspect asked. For all you know, you could be somewhere where you have no hope of getting back home. You could be thousands of kilometers from your hometown. Even if you did get home, your changed appearance would cause all sorts of problems trying to reclaim your own life. Would anyone believe you were who you said you were? What if this Gabriel guy is your only lifeline? I'm sure he'd do everything in his power to help the girl he loves. Instead of you being a solitary homeless teenager, you'd have a home.
That's insane! I thought. This is, like, an unparalleled degree of manipulation. You could never live like that! What the hell is wrong with you?
I gave my mirror-self another look. I would be lying if I said I didn't sort of want my real body back, but being Monika was a lot better in some ways. She was way more fit and beautiful than I was. Her face was so clear, attractive, and flawless it almost seemed like a light source. The kind of person every girl dreamed of being. In the flesh, it seemed more unreal than it had on a screen. In games and television, perfect attractiveness is a given. In the real world, people like this are uncommon. Not everyone can be a model.
I was not really sure what to do. If I told him the truth, would Gabriel sympathise with me? Would he believe me? Would he want to believe me? My heart felt heavy, like it was unable to pump anymore and blood was just piling up inside it while my brain suffocated. I fell forward and caught myself on the sink countertop. Heavy, rhythmic breaths passed through my respiratory system. What was I supposed to make of any of this? What was even going on? How did I get into this situation? Was there some higher power who thought this was funny? Was this experience just a psychotic episode? Was I irrecoverably insane? Was anything I was seeing real? I could feel water welling in my eyes. All I wanted was to go home. To be my real self again. To see my friends. Anything but this cold, unfamiliar nightmare. You don't realise how good you have it in life until all the mundane things you take for granted are wrenched from you.
I walked back down the hallway not having come to a conclusion.
When I opened the door to Gabriel's room, he immediately knew something was wrong.
"Hey, have you been crying? What's bothering you?", he said, with a soft, caring tone.
In the background, I noticed he had his computer on, next to his bed. It seemed to be running, was that the Monika After Story mod? Except Monika herself was nowhere to be found. Of course, I thought. I'm here.
"Uh, okay, so..."; I paused for a moment to think about how exactly I was going to phrase this... and paused... and-
"Do you want to go have dinner? We can talk about it there" he supplied.
"I mean, uh, well, I-"
"Alright, let's do it! It'll be a date" he said happily.
"You know, sure, we can do that" I said. I flashed a small smile. Wait, did he say-
Before I could elaborate on my response, he turned around and walked out of his room.
Well, so much for that, I guess. At least I can explain everything to him there.
And so it was that I found myself being driven in a stranger's truck to a, well it turned out to be a Wendy's. Huh, I thought to myself. Could be worse.
We ordered from the counter (out of respect to the real Monika, wherever she was, I ordered a vegetarian item), and took a booth.
"Alright" Gabriel began, smiling, "so what's bothering you?"
I had given a lot of thought over the ride here as to the word choice I was going to employ, so I was immediately able to-
"So do you miss your friends? Or did something about, you know, getting into the real world hurt you? Actually, how did you do that? I'm curious" he said excitedly.
"I mean, actually I'm not complete sure what happened?" I said tentatively. "I kind of just, fell asleep, and got materialised in your bedroom. But anyways what I meant to tell you was-"
"Wait, you go to sleep in the game world?"
"I-"
"That's really weird, honestly, I'd ask you how it works, but I'm more interested in asking you what you think of my bedroom"
"I'm not sure I didn't get that good of a look at it." Something flickered across my mind "Actually, wait, are you sure it was a good idea to bring me here to talk about this? I mean, anyone random person could overhear you talking about 'the game world', notice I look EXACTLY like Monika, and out two and two together. In fact, speaking of looki-"
"I mean, it's what they always do in the movies, I guess" he said, slightly dejected.
Before I or Gabriel could say anything, I noticed that someone was standing next us. A male with soft features, probably about my age, with glasses, a shaved face, and light brown hair; wearing a dark brown jacket and khaki pants. He was smirking slightly, and had his hands on his hips. And looking at me.
"So what is this?" he asked. "A joke?"
Gabriel at first looked lost for words. Unfortunately, he was not. "Oh, what's up, Kyle. Monika, meet Kyle. Kyle, meet Monika. I was special enough for her to choose me". 'Kyle' did not take his eyes off me, which enabled him to get what I could only assume was a pretty good look at my contorted facial reaction to what Gabriel had just said.
"It's rude to stare, you know" Gabriel said, evidently noticing this.
"It's also rude to act like I'm an idiot" the Kyle said. "Actually, what even are you doing? I wasn't aware you had a girlfriend? And someone who would dress up as an anime character for you? What am I even-"
"DDLC isn't anime!" Gabriel and I said in unison. This only made Kyle even more confused.
"Okay you know what, I'm just not even going to be involved in this. Nope. Not happening. You may do whatever it is you are doing in peace". He started to turn around.
"Wait!" I said. "Why don't you eat with us? I can give you half of my veggie burger. Actually, wait, you've ordered something yourself, right? Since, you know, you're here? and-"
"Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Why don't you? I can explain what's happening. Also you need to tell me what happened between you and Mike yesterday. Something about a dent in his car?" interjected Gabriel
"Yeah, sure, okay" Kyle capitulated. He walked over to another table and brought his things over to our booth.
"Wait, you went into a restaurant by yourself?" I said, with a hint of smugness. Kyle immediately went red, but did not say anything.
"Okay, man, you've gotta believe me" Gabriel said. "This is the real Monika, she actually like materialised in my house today"
"Monica? Is that the anime person she's cosplaying as? Good cosplay, by the way. You look... immaculate" Kyle replied. This made Gabriel slightly annoyed.
"You gotta believe me man! Bro, this is wild. Skull emoji" Gabriel shot back.
Kyle rolled his eyes "Clown emoji. Anyways, what's your actual name? Please don't say Monica. If you say Monica I'm going to break out in tears."
I drew upon my very best triumphant grin.
"L-"
"Monika!" Gabriel said.
